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posted by u/futurestr.88
AITA for choosing my cat over my boyfriend?
Hello! It feels strange to come inside of an online space to vent about the current issues regarding my relationship with my boyfriend, but a friend of mine advised that I try here. She said it might prove useful, though I have doubts. No offense to you lovely people, perhaps she knows something I don't and I am always open to learn more!!!
It is only right to have an open mind as a future star!!!!
Moving on, I wouldn't want to bother you by talking too much. As the title suggests, I am here to explain my situation and preferably hear about your opinions within a respectful line. Please don't talk bad about my cat, thank you.
Things were going great between me and my partner, whom I will be referring to as ‘the Director’ from now on. We have a healthy and loving relationship; we like to share things with each other, gift-giving happens here and there, the Director is very specific with his surprise dates and he even stopped creating fire hazards around the house after we became official! I'm really glad he heard my concerns about safety and how my hair gets singed every time he does something over the top. He says he would still continue to love me if I were bald but I'm sorry, I can't bring myself to accept the reality of losing my precious hair.
Well, is it understandable enough? I care about him as much as he cares about me and dare I say, even more than that. You see, the Director is a very special someone that I cherish as my lover and best friend. And I believe with all my heart that this feeling is mutual.
So, with my intentions in mind, could you seriously call me an absent/ignorant/avoidant lover just because I chose my cat over him once?
One time. All it took was one time of this happening and suddenly I'm the bad guy. He treats me like he knows me no more!
It breaks my heart to the shreds. Truthfully, I could never imagine that there would come a day where the Director would behave as if I, his lover of four months, am a stranger. We've been friends for five years before we became lovers, the audacity!
I wonder if it's true that love changes people. The thought of it breaks my heart even more, leaving me feeling all sad and angry: Sad that the Director is playing dirty against me and refusing to communicate properly. And angry that he has the galls to talk so callously about Nyantaro!
As mentioned, Nyantaro is my cat. Actually, he is more than a cat; he is a friend that I treasure wholeheartedly. He understands me on a deeper level that I didn't know animals could do at all before meeting him. I like to think of our bond as something special and we are partners for life; he has my back and I will always have his. You see, friendship is always important to me!
The Director knows that but continues to scrunch up his nose in distaste. You are still my best friend, you know? Are you worried that since we are lovers, now the spot of being my best friend is left empty? Your worries are unfounded then, here I am telling you!
Apologies, I get carried away too easily. Let's talk about the core of my problem.
It was a nice Wednesday evening when everything started to go downhill. I made dinner as always, things that both the Director and I like to eat. There was only one different thing that I also did that night, which was cooking a handmade dinner for Nyantaro too. My friends tell me that I get influenced easily but spare the thought, okay? I couldn't resist when I saw those delicious looking cat meals on my social media feed! Nyantaro agrees too!
While we were eating our dinner, I mentioned Nyantaro's handmade meal that I cooked and other recipes that I want to try in the future for him because come on, Nyantaro meowed so sweetly and looked joyous after receiving his meal, how could I not deliver more to him?
However, the root of my problem started right there. The Director seemed happy for me and Nyantaro, he caressed Nyantaro with his usual smile (so gentle around the edges) but something was aloof. His eyes didn't shine as much and he looked like he was having an argument inside his head, with himself.
I didn't say anything. The Director is very closeted when the topic is about his emotions, he is bad at opening up. So I don't like to push him or demand things from him that he isn't ready for. Instead, I waited.
The second instance happened when I was knitting a small hoodie for Nyantaro. Winter was knocking on our door, so I wanted to have him wear something warm. I could easily buy a cloth that suits his measurements online but I like to do things on my own for my loved ones. So I ended up knitting the cutest hoodie for him!
Guys, he absolutely loved it!!! You should've seen his proud face when he was posing in front of the mirror whilst wearing the hoodie I knitted for him!!
Shortly after the Director happened. I told him about my knitting adventure and kudos to him, this time if I wasn't careful enough I wouldn't have noticed his momentary frown while I was talking. It put me off, seeing that we weren't sharing the same joy of witnessing Nyantaro being warm and cute in the winter.
This whole thing also made me think harder. I wonder if he doesn't like Nyantaro but tolerates him because of me, like how he tolerates seeing veggies in the fridge because I have a healthy diet unlike him?
Oh, woe is me! Isn't this bad? On one side, there stands my boyfriend, who seems to be missing some screws in his head but good hearted nevertheless. And on the other side, our beloved cat Nyantaro! How could the Director harbor any ill filled emotion towards him? Beats me!
The third and last instance came upon us like lightning falling down on a tree. We were about to go to bed after a long day, both of us were battered from work and everyday busy life. Whenever I felt stressed out or lost, I liked to snuggle to the Director to recharge. There is an intimate concept of your lover drawing a wall around you with their body to protect you from the outside world while you sleep, have you ever heard of that? That's what the Director does for me! And I do it for him occasionally as well. Long story short, we like to cuddle.
Alas, the protective walls around me crumbled when we noticed that Nyantaro was trying to lay on my chest to snuggle with me…
Ah…
It was adorable!!!!!!
I was overjoyed to see our cat being affectionate towards me because I've heard from here and there that cats are very picky creatures, they don't show their love to people easily. I feel so loved though, thank you, Nyantaro!
I thought that the three of us could cuddle to sleep but I was struck by my shock when I realized that the Director didn't share the same sentiment with me. He stared at Nyantaro defiantly for a second and turned back to me, looking deep into my eyes as if he was waiting for me to make a decision.
To either choose him or Nyantaro to share cuddles.
That heathen! You don't know, guys, but believe me when I say that despite his less than favorable diet, the Director is bigger and taller than me. That means he could've spooned both me and Nyantaro! I feel like I am going to lose my mind, why is he acting like a kid!?
Now he cuts our conversation short whenever Nyantaro is in the room with us and I don't know if it's TMI (an abbreviation for ‘Too Much Information’, as my friend told me) but he kisses me like he wants to leave a mark on my lips, which is silly. Director, I thought you were a man of reason! What happened to your rationality?
That's it, here everything lies before your very eyes. My friend said I'd feel better if I vent to strangers online for some reason. Since there are already so many posts here, I don't really think this post of mine is going to be much of an eye candy. Still, thank you for reading until here. I appreciate your time!
I feel lost and when I try to compensate with something that I'm sure would make him happy, it does the opposite. Seriously, I wonder if it's because I chose Nyantaro and I keep doing things for him as much as I do for the Director.
What should I do? How should I thread this thin line?
—
“That's it!” Tsukasa exclaimed proudly after he clicked ‘post’ and turned his phone screen to Nyantaro to show him exactly what he had done.
Nyantaro flicked one of his ears at him in question. Or Tsukasa assumed it to be so. He frowned and looked back at his phone, still comprehending everything he had written there. “You don't think that Rui is actually jealous, right?”
Being a cat didn't allow Nyantaro to answer him properly in human language. He only kept staring at him and meowed.
“Hmm…”
—
EDIT: Hello again, guys! I'm quite surprised to see that this post gained as much attention as it did, so I would like to thank you all for your kind comments, funny inquiries and helpful suggestions! Truly, nothing beats the warm and comfortable feeling of having a community right by your side! So I thought about updating you on our situation here and now: We made up!! It turns out my partner was feeling jealous, that's all. And he desperately needs to work on communicating his feelings. I will be helping him thoroughly!
EDIT 2: Isn't it so silly to know that he was feeling jealous because of our cat? I'm still laughing. He thought since I was doing the ‘special’ gestures that I reserved to only him to Nyantaro, he felt replaced somehow. Which is so, so stupid. So much for being called a genius, I guess. You are lucky that I adore this side of you too.
EDIT 3: Upon receiving a high amount of demand, here are some pictures of Nyantaro!!!! ISN'T HE THE CUTEST????
EDIT 4: Nene, it's been months since I've posted this, please stop commenting under this post. I've noticed different accounts making comments recently and Rui informed me that all of those accounts belong to you. I know you like to use this post as a joke but you should get new hobbies. Why do you have so many accounts anyway?