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Stelle admired Dan Heng.
She wasn’t sure exactly when did it start. The memory of waking up to his face close to hers as he was about to perform questionable CPR on her was something that still made her internally squeal, even if she was used to teasing Dan Heng with it.
Was it then maybe? Surely not, unless Stelle was actually a baby chick, imprinting on her soulmate the moment she first opened her eyes. A ridiculous thought, but something March would undoubtedly like if she ever heard that.
When Stelle thought of the word ‘Soulmate’, her usually expressionless face took on a dark pink color. Did she actually think of Dan Heng this way? She wasn’t completely sure, but it was possible – it’s not like she wasn’t aware of how much she stared at him. Or thought of him. Or looked up to him. Or enjoyed his company. Or fantasized of him dragging her into the archives and-
Okay, hold up. She needed to stop that train of thought right now.
Fine, maybe she did like Dan Heng more than a friend or a comrade, but it still doesn’t mean he feels the same way about her. No way around that: she’s loud, obnoxious and a dumpster diver. She constantly disrupts his peace and quiet to hang out with him. Sure, he never complained about her company and at worst almost jokingly admonished her when she went dumpster diving, but he’s just not the type to be mean, right? He’s such a good person and he would just feel bad about telling her that she’s annoying, so that’s why he won’t do that, right?
And yet, he went as far as comforting her and letting her stay when she came to him about her nightmares, never turning her away.
Dan Heng always indulged her when she wanted to hang out or just ask him something. Or when she wanted to show him something she dug out of a trashcan. When she wanted to go somewhere, he always went along with a barely visible smile. During expeditions, he always threw himself in front of her just so that he could shield her from harm. When she couldn’t sleep, he would hold her tight until her worries were gone, always staying with her until morning, and she was always thankful for that.
There wasn’t any sense in denying it. Stelle loved Dan Heng.
And how could she not? The Vidyadhara always stood by her no matter what, after all. The thought had left Stelle less surprised than she expected. Perhaps it was something she had already known, but was afraid to admit. After all, wouldn’t that mean the eventual heartbreak of him rejecting her?
No, stop that train of thought. Spiraling into doubt won’t solve the issue. Stelle smiled. Now that she thought of that, that’s one thing she has in common with Dan Heng. They both tend to overthink things.
***
“Hey, am I annoying?” Stelle felt stupid for asking that question, while Dan Heng looked up at her in surprise, turning away from his desk at the archives. His teal eyes looked her over with a questioning gaze.
“What brought that on?” He looked her in the eyes with a serious expression on his face. “I swear if someone’s messing with you-”
“No-no, it’s nothing like that!” Stelle quickly shook her head, slightly surprised at the sudden protectiveness. “It’s just… I’m always barging in here and disrupting your work… And I constantly get in trouble and you always bail me out. And I bring trash into your room every day…” She looked down, as if afraid to look Dan Heng in the eyes.
“Oh, so you’re aware of your behavior?” Stelle flinched slightly, but then Dan Heng surprised her by holding her hand. She looked up at him and saw a gentle smile on his face. “Well, I want to spend time with you. And I wouldn’t tolerate such behavior from anyone else but you.” He said simply.
Stelle felt warm after hearing his words. Did that mean- No, hold your horses. This still doesn’t mean he’s interested, right? They’re just really close friends. Yeah, that’s right.
“But,” She thinks. “It doesn’t hurt to hope, right?”
Yeah. Maybe he was actually interested in her. Still, Stelle couldn’t help but be scared a bit: What if this blows up in her face? Confessing now would be too risky, they have an expedition ahead of them, and she will be going there along with Dan Heng.
Maybe this ‘Amphoreus’ place will be her chance? Who knows?