Work Text:
The night is still warm. Not as sweltering as a suffocating London summer night but somewhat soft, with a kind wind cooling heated skin.
Teddy is sound asleep next to him.
It's all about trust, he said. Everything is trust.
Jonathan wants to make him trust. Wants to trust himself. Stupid. Foolish. On the verge of falling for him. This beautiful, dangerous man that is supposed to be his prey.
His target. The one he needs to expose and take down like he took Dickie down.
Richard Roper. Teddy dos Santos.
Allegedly alike. The same kind. Yet so different. So very different.
So, Jonathan wants to trust. He wants to tell him. The next time he calls him Matthew. Matt. Matty. A silky whisper in his ear. Velvet smooth.
He wants to tell him. That he's a Jonathan. Only that.
He hasn't been Jonathan for a long time now. He became a Jack, a Thomas, an Andrew in quick succession. Then went on to be Alex for a while. Now he's Matthew - and his heart is not in it. His heart -
Teddy sniffles in his sleep and turns to his side, cuddling against Jonathan's thigh.
Jonathan lifts his right hand, hesitates, listens to the sound of Teddy's breaths, starts to breathe along. He finally touches the messy mop of dark hair, gently stroking. Maybe he can just have this night. Maybe he can have a couple more. Maybe. So many maybes.
-~-
The night is still warm. Not as sweltering as a suffocating London summer night but somewhat soft, with a kind wind cooling heated skin. More humid than Bogotà though. And with the gentle hum of the cicadas that fade into a background noise as soon as you get used to it, coming back fulminantly for a concertesque crescendo only when you make yourself focus on them again.
Jonathan leans onto the windowsill and follows the flickering path of a satellite. Wonders whose it is. Commercial or military. And what it's doing. What-
A hand on his shoulder. A voice in his ear. “Counting stars?” Smooth as velvet.
Jonathan chuckles. “Not exactly.”
“Come back to bed, Matty.”
Jonathan sighs. He turns on his heel and pulls Teddy close in one swift motion.
“Everything is trust, you said.”
“Yes?” It's more of a question than an answer, dark eyes searching his.
Jonathan takes a deep breath and braces for impact. “My name is Jonathan.”
Teddy smiles.