Chapter Text
It felt like the whole world was suddenly flipped upside down. One week, everything was perfect. Flawless. No more hiding, no more running away, no more worrying about the past, or the future. But then, once the time was up, it returned. The burden of getting pushed back into the old body, the version of Elisabeth the industry has left to rot, simply because she was no longer the ‘pretty girl’ that they wanted. And now, she was doing the exact same thing to herself. She spent her weeks in utter misery, sunken into the sofa, either watching TV, or emptily staring out of the window at the billboard outside the apartment complex, with the text ‘Pump It Up, with Sue’ printed on in big bold letters, accompanied by the picture of a young, twenty - something year old girl, wearing a bright pink bikini so revealing, it almost felt like she was making a joke out of herself, just counting down the seconds until she gets to be her again, even if for a single week.
Elisabeth didn’t have anything, or anyone to live for anymore. No family, no friends, and the only people that brought her some semblance of joy in life ended up throwing her away once she was no longer useful to them. It wasn’t easy suffering through an entire week like that, so it was no wonder that, as Sue, Elisabeth always felt the need to squeeze out as much time as she could while she was still this ‘better’, ‘more youthful’, ‘more perfect’ version of herself. But even that seemed to have betrayed her in the end, and as she stood over the bathroom sink, scrubbing her hand so hard it almost felt like her skin was about to peel off, Elisabeth internally cursed herself for not figuring it out sooner. The rules were as clear as day: One week in, one week out, without exception. Even a few extra hours could have severe consequences, and yet, she still found a way to mess it up. ‘’That stupid bitch Sue…Why couldn’t she just respect the balance?’’ She mumbled under her breath.
Eventually, after several minutes of desperate scrubbing and scratching, Elisabeth let out a frustrated groan and stepped away from the sink, raising her left hand to look at the damage again. The skin around her pointer finger has begun to blacken and wither away, taking on a sickly, ashy appearance. The nail, which used to always be trimmed and filed to perfection, occasionally painted with a few coats of a classy red polish, has now lost all of its former color and shape, and it seemed like if Elisabeth pulled hard enough, it would slide right off her finger. It was a repulsing sight, one that no amount of water, products, or procedures could ever reverse. They have already made that abundantly clear. ‘’What’s been used up on one side is lost on the other side.’’ Said the monotone voice over the phone speaker. ‘’There’s no going back.’’ It was the ugly truth of being a user of the Substance, but it was hard to admit that it was indeed Elisabeth who has let go of herself like this, and not Sue. All she wanted was to just start over, live a better life in a better body. She knew to always respect the balance, but Sue didn’t. All of this was her fault. Elisabeth slowly reached out, her healthy fingers briefly brushing over her lower back, sending a sharp jolt of pain through her spine. Just how much fluid did she take from her? And, more importantly, if only a few extra drops cost her an entire finger, what would’ve happened had she taken any more…?
Elisabeth stood in front of the long row of windows in her living room, looking out into the distance with a vacant look on her face, just like she always did during her weeks. While was still boiling with rage from Sue’s blatant misuse of the Substance, she couldn’t help but feel like it was, to a degree, understandable. She was just the vessel, after all. Other than giving birth to her, she had no purpose in this world. If she wanted to give herself a little extra time before having to switch, she had every right to do so. She was the only loveable part of her, after all, there was no point in trying to deny it anymore. And yet, despite this inner turmoil, there was something else hidden underneath it all. A different feeling. Loneliness. The harsh reality that the only person she was able to build up even the slightest bit of attachment to was the ‘perfect’ version of her own self, all her insecurities combined into a single suit of flesh, hit her like a ton of bricks. She was more alone than ever before.
Elisabeth walked back over to the sofa and sat down, wearily running a hand through her hair. Now that she knew there was nothing to be done about her newly earned deformity, all there was left to do was to spend the week wasting away, until she can finally switch and start living properly again. As much as she wished there was a way around it, it seemed like there was none. She’s dug a hole so deep for herself that she couldn’t see the surface anymore. Elisabeth sighed and began trying to think of anything, anything to do to distract herself from all that’s happened to her that day, but there were hardly any meaningful options. Well…Maybe except for one. An idea suddenly sparked in Elisabeth’s mind, and she quickly got up and hurried towards her closet to grab her jacket. Runmaging through one of the pockets, she eventually pulled out a crumpled up, grimy piece of paper that looked like it’s been dropped in a puddle of water before getting clumsily fished out by someone. On it, there was a set of numbers, with a hurriedly scribbled text under it, reading ‘’Call me!’’. For a moment, she hesitated. but there was nothing else left to do.
Ringing echoed through the bathroom. Elisabeth was sat on the toilet, holding a phone against her ear with one hand while nervously fidgeting with the other, shoulders tense. She has received many phone calls throughout life, but she was almost never the one making the call. She just hoped she could get through it without messing up the script in her head that she practiced for so long. After several more seconds of dragged out ringing, a click could be heard on the other side. Elisabeth immediately tensed up. ‘’Hello?’’ Said the voice from the speaker. ‘’Hi Fred…It’s Lizzie!’’ She responded, a bit sheepishly. Fred. Elisabeth’s old friend back from high school. By sheer coincidence, she just so happened to bump into him on her way from picking up food for Sue earlier that day. She didn’t like to admit it, but there was not much she remembered about him. In fact, she had a hard time recalling ever even having friends in high school. But that didn’t seem to be the case for Fred, quite the opposite, in fact. The moment he saw her, all the memories flooded back, and he couldn’t help but stop to tell her how beautiful she still was despite all the years that passed, and even offered to give her his number, before, however, accidentally dropping the note with it in a puddle. Luckily, despite nearly getting destroyed by Fred’s clumsiness, Elisabeth decided to keep the note, in case she ever felt the need to call, despite it being extremely unlikely. But now, she was quite glad she did. There was a brief moment of silence on the other end, which put her on edge, ‘’…Hello?’’ She said anxiously. ‘’…Sorry, I—I’m in shock.’’ Fred responded after a few moments, his voice switching from a casual, upbeat tone to a more incredulous one, before letting out a disbelieving laugh. ‘’Wow, wow wow! I…I thought I’d never hear from you again after—‘’ ‘’—Oh, gosh, not at all!’’ Elisabeth quickly cut him off to reassure him. “I’ve just…I’ve just been really busy lately.’’ She paused for a moment before speaking again, her voice starting to become a bit more hasty. ‘’So, listen, I was thinking that…’’ another pause. ‘’…That we could, maybe, get together, and…Grab a drink?’’ No response again, which made Elisabeth even more anxious about the whole ordeal than she already was. She repeatedly ran her fingers against the piece of paper with Fred’s number laying on her lap in order to soothe herself a little bit. ‘’…A-Are you still there?’’ She asked, barely being able to stop the subtle shaking in her voice, her eyes darting restlessly across the room. ‘’…Sorry, I—I’m in shock again!’’ Fred finally admitted through the speaker, sending an immediate sense of relief through Elisabeth’s body. ‘’Oh!’’ She laughed out loud. Fred excitedly chimed in. ‘’I could book Luigi’s! At eight?’’ ‘’Um, eight at Leu…Igis it is.’’ Elisabeth said, stumbling over her words a bit, but it didn’t matter at this point. ‘’I…I will see you tonight.’’ She said with a sense of finality, her voice no longer shaking, as a smile spread across her face. ‘’Alright, bye!’’ Fred replied excitedly. ‘’Okay, bye.’’ She replied back, feeling even more excitement than him, but made sure to conceal as much of it as she could, before hanging up and sighing in relief. It was done. She did it. She’s overcome her fears, and has secured herself a date. Her body finally had a purpose. Now she just had to get ready to make sure she’ll be on time.