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“Bones!”
“Damn it, Jim. Get out of here”
Jim’s nose scrunched up as he cocked his head to the side, offering an ‘are you kidding me’ half-smile.
“And let you have all the fun?” Jim quipped, grabbing hold of his chief medical officer’s shoulder.
Bones shrugged it off with an unimpressed glare, then, continued to do whatever the hell he’d been up to before Jim had kindly interrupted.
“So...is there anything I can do to help?” Jim rocked on the balls of his feet, hands clasped politely in front of him.
Bones let out an angry huff as he yanked a seemingly important chunk of wires out from the broken console.
“Yeah, you can start by shutting the hell up” he snarled.
Jim’s smile slipped slightly, “Ouch, Bones... I thought doctors were supposed to be comforting”
Bones didn’t bother to grace Jim with a glare, “I’m off duty”
“Not for another seven minutes, actually” Jim corrected.
“Shut up”
An alarm began to blare loudly overhead, casting the two Starfleet officers in an angry red light.
“Warning: Complete system failure on deck 11” a calm robotic voice informed.
Bones gave Jim a scathing look.
Jim held his hands up defensively, “I didn’t do it”
Bones ignored that and dug further into the side of the ship; his upper torso leaning so far into the hole he’d created that he was practically a part of the ship.
“You know…if you’d let me help, we can get this thing over with faster and go for lunch” Jim declared.
“Go to hell, Jim”
Jim sighed, crossing his arms over his chest and bracing his back against the wall.
There was a sudden tremor that shook the captain upright, accompanied by a sickening flicker of lights.
“Life support is now off-line. Oxygen levels depleting” the robotic voice informed.
“Ain’t that just grand” Bones muttered angrily.
Jim rolled his eyes, ready for this to be over.
“Artificial gravity malfunctioning” the speakers stuttered.
As if to prove it, both officers began to levitate.
It appeared to interfere with Bones ability to fix this mess.
A loud curse rattled out from the panel of wires before the cause of said anger (an escaping tool) drifted out from the console, merrily flipping end over end on its path to freedom.
Out of the good doctor’s reach.
Bones receded from the panel, snatching at the tool.
He missed.
“Jim, fetch me that tool” Bones demanded, one hand now clutched to the wall to prevent his own departure.
“Thought you didn’t want my help” Jim replied.
Bones stared at Jim for a moment more.
“Fine. I’ll get it myself” he growled stubbornly.
Jim hadn’t expected a decent retort.
Pouncing from the wall, Bones launched his body towards the tool, catching it with ease. As he met up with the second wall of the corridor, Bones rotated his body, planted his boots on the new surface and frog leaped back to his original position.
Jim thought it was quite the spectacle.
It made it all the more unfortunate that the tool never managed to offer assistance. Time had run out.
The robotic voice let out a shrill pitched whistle, signaling the point beyond which no one could survive.
At this point, the artificial gravity slammed them both back to the floor.
As Jim stumbled back to his feet, Bones belly flopped onto the floor, emitting a groan akin to an outraged beast.
“Simulation terminated”
Jim clapped his hands together, praising his medical officer’s shining results, “Outstanding effort, Bones”
Bones pushed himself up to his feet, his face filled with a barely disguised fury.
“It would have been, if you hadn’t barged in here and nit-picked at my back like an ape on steroids” he poked Jim in the chest accusingly.
Jim slapped Bone’s needle-like finger away, rubbing at the sore spot with a frown, “There’s bound to be a distraction or two on board during a crisis, Bones” he stated, matter-of-factly. “You’ve just gotta ignore ‘em”
Bones shook his head vigorously and shoved the infuriating child aside, walking at a pace that would suggest he clearly didn’t want Jim to follow.
Jim followed anyway.
As the simulator doors whooshed open, Scotty walked in to greet the duo.
Bones promptly marched passed while Jim raised a finger, “Rain check, Scotty” he apologized, a warm smile on his face.
Scotty closed his mouth, turning on the spot to witness the hasty retreat.
Spock would have been proud of the new heights his eyebrows had reached.
“Come on, Bones! It was just a practice run” Jim whined, struggling to keep up with his friend’s angry pace.
“Yeah, well the threat was still a real one” Bones shot back, taking a sudden right.
Jim backpedaled his momentum and jogged to catch up.
A second bay door opened as the duo reached the cafeteria.
“So you do want to have lunch” Jim chuckled.
“Take-out” Bones corrected.
Jim frowned, “You’re really gonna hold a grudge about this?”
Bones held a tray up to the food replicator and ordered his usual southern chow, “Till the day I die, Jim”
“Now who’s exaggerating?” Jim pointed out.
Bones merely turned his back on Jim and headed for the nearest turbo lift.
Jim pondered following the doctor this time, weighing the likelihood of an early demise against his innate need to banter.
Of course, Jim chose the turbo lift.
The cramped compartment became intensely awkward, surprisingly fast. Neither man said a word.
The lofty music didn’t help.
As the door slid open, Bones set off again. This time, he was headed for his quarters.
“Um…so are we gonna share or are you gonna wait for me to fetch-“ Jim proposed.
“Why don’t you make like Spock and pester another poor soul” Bones suggested, pressing the pad to his door and drifting in.
Jim followed up with a useless remark, “Because, Bones, I’m busy having lunch with my favourite grumpy space doctor”
Bones dropped the tray loudly onto his desk and turned to Jim with a flat look, “Aren’t you overdue for a check up?”
Jim’s smile flipped into a worried frown lightening fast.
“Uh, I think Scotty wanted to talk to me about something when we ran by him earlier. Don’t wanna keep him waiting. Nice talk, though…” Jim rambled, retreating from the doctor’s room, down the hall, and into the turbo lift before anyone could argue.
Bones shook his head, returning to his meal, “Typical”