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Christmas in the lab was strangely merry. They set up a Christmas tree (Peacock had created a talking one, but it ran off to pursue a life as a bank robber), and all of the younger kids believed in Lady Clause. Iluem had gotten them to make paper chains and wreaths and popcorn garlands. Big Band had been playing jazzy Christmas carols while Squigly sang along, and it was even snowing outside. Not that they could really go outside, but it still looked nice.
Painwheel had been avoiding most of the festivities. She couldn’t remember what Christmas was like with her parents, but even trying to think about it hurt. As for what she wanted, she really couldn’t think of a single thing. She’d grown out of most toys, and she didn’t have any use for the usual things a teenager would like. After all, they were all stuck in her unless they went on a mission. What was the point of looking nice?
Still, she tried to hide it for the little ones. Most of them had only ever known life in the lab, and most of the older ones were used to it. If the holidays were bothering Marie or Squigly, they didn’t show it. And Filia had always loved Christmas. Painwheel remembered that much.
She’d spent most of the day in her dorm reading while the others enjoyed decorating and baking. The smell of fresh-baked cookies and hot chocolate made her mouth water, but she didn’t have the energy to go out there. The cold was making her usual pain worse, and her metal parts made sure she stayed freezing no matter how warm the room was. She was huddled under the blankets when she heard a knock at the door.
“Come in,” she muttered, privately dreading whoever was entering.
Filia came in, holding a plate of cookies in one hand, a mug of hot chocolate in the other, and a second mug in her hair. She placed all three down on the little table they had.
“Are you feeling okay?”
Painwheel shrugged. The answer was no—it was kind of in her name. But she didn’t want to complain. There were four cookies: two messily decorated gingerbread men, a sugar cookie shaped like a snowman, and a dark chocolate cookie with a half-melted marshmallow on the top of it. The hot cocoa was piled high with whipped cream, marshmallows, and sprinkles, with a candy cane in each cup. Despite herself, Painwheel found herself immediately drawn to the warmth and wrapped her hands around the well-worn mug, inhaling the smell of chocolate and sugar.
“Didn’t feel like coming out?” Filia asked gently.
Painwheel shook her head. She sipped some of the hot chocolate. Damn, it was good. Marie had probably made it. That girl could cook.
“It’s just a bit overwhelming,” she said softly. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be,” Filia said. “Peacock and Marie got in a fight because she tried to steal her cookies, and Iluem had to break them up. Then Lent tried to crawl in the oven, and Crawley released some of his maggots into the kitchen, which Marie did not like. Then some of them got on Squigly and started eating her, and now Avian has to come over to patch her up.”
“Wow,” Painwheel said. “Guess I did the smart thing staying here.”
“You bet,” Filia sighed, taking one of the gingerbread men. “Always chaotic here, huh?”
“Yeah.”
Painwheel decided to try the marshmallow cookie. It was fudgy and delicious. For a moment, the holidays didn’t seem so bad. Her and Filia, talking and enjoying cookies. It felt almost familiar. Normal.
She hadn’t gotten the chance to feel normal for a while.
“Want to watch a Christmas movie?”
The words were out of her mouth before she could stop them. Before she could even realize that she genuinely wanted to watch a Christmas movie with Filia. Filia grinned.
“Sure. Want to watch one of those stupid romances and make fun of it the whole time?”
“They’re not that stupid,” Painwheel said, scooching closer to Filia.
For warmth. Nothing else. Filia rested her head on her shoulder as she turned on the TV.
“You’re such a sap,” she said.
“I know you love them too.”
“Only because they’re so hilariously bad. Here, in this one, a girl falls in love with a snowwoman who also runs a Christmas tree farm and hot cocoa shop.”
“Sounds good,” Painwheel said.
She took a sip of her own hot cocoa as the movie started. And for a moment, it felt like Christmas again.