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How did we end up like this?
We had everything. But it was never enough for you, was it?
Macaque sighed as he watched the brotherhood from a distance. Their boisterous laughs could be heard from the other side of the mountain, their voices loud and grating to his ears. In the middle of it all was Wukong, his sun, his king, his everything.
He felt his eyes sting, tears ready to fall but didn't thanks to his stubbornness. He couldn't show he was upset; tonight would be like every other night. Except tomorrow is the day they will go fight heaven.
A crash followed by laughter directed his attention to the party. Wukong was laughing, drenched in wine that stained his yellow robes blood red. He dropped into his shadows to emerge in a corner of the room, putting on his acting smile.
"I got more fruits-Wukong? Look at you." he grumbled as he went to pick his king up.
"Macaque-hic! There you-hic are-hic!" Wukong said, draping his arms around his shoulders and burying his face in the crook of his neck.
"Took your time, monkey. Got lost in the jungle?" Peng snickered, always wanting to talk down at the other.
Macaque simply ignored them, focusing on the drunk monkey in his arms.
"I think that the party lasted long enough. We need to be sober if we want to fight tomorrow."
"Macaque is right," agreed Azure as he stood up from his seat. "Brothers, I bid you goodnight. Tomorrow is the great day we will conquer heaven! Let's rest and gather our energies!"
They all agreed and got up to return to their rooms in varying degrees of stumbling, but all managed to stay on their feet. Macaque bid them goodnight and then looked at Wukong, who showed no signs of moving.
"Wukong?"
"Moonlight?" he slurred, looking at him with one eye, not bothering to lift his head.
"Let's go clean you up, shall we?"
"Noooo." he whined, tightening his hold on Macaque's shoulder. "Carry me~?"
Macaque huffed, unamused by his childish act, and picked him up in a princess style. Wukong simply rubbed his cheeks against his shoulder, purring slightly and sighing in contentment.
He dropped in a shadow and reemerged before the hot springs, entering them with his clothes still on. He knew it was a losing battle to try and unlatch Wukong from himself.
"Uh?"
Wukong blinked groggily and looked around, confused. His mind took a few seconds to register where he was, and he turned to look at Macaque with a pout.
"I said no-hic-bath...you meanie."
"Yeah, how mean of me. You clearly weren't drenched in wine, my bad." Mac teased him as he started to undress his silly King.
"I was?" he wondered, clearly not remembering what happened before.
Mac tossed the drenched clothes out of the pool and then took off his own, letting the water soothe his aching body and heart. Wukong was leaning over the stone, head cushioned by his arms and a pleased smile on his face.
"Wukong?"
"Mihuo?"
"Do you love me?"
Wukong nodded fast enough to get dizzy.
"Yes, I loveee you! You are my best bud for-ever!"
This made Macaque smile, even if it was a sad one. Wukong was always sincere when he was drunk.
So maybe, if he forsaken the war to stay with him, he could stay. Please don't make him leave.
"How much do you love me?"
"Thhiiiiissssshhh much!" He threw his arms wide open, making water splash around.
"Really?"
"Yes!"
"Enough to stop the war with Heaven?"
This seemed to make him pause, connecting the words in his mind.
"The war?"
"Wukong," he took his hands "don't fight Heaven. Don't fight the Jade Emperor. Do it for me. Listen to me." he pleaded, tears returning to his eyes, lips wobbling with contained sobs.
"Tell me we will stay together, basking in the sun and eating fruit forever. Promise me you won't fight tomorrow."
He flinched slightly when a hand touched his face, and he looked up at Wukong to see him closer than before. "Mihou... don't be sad."
Wukong wiped away his tears, and Macaque couldn't help but lean into his hand, pressing it firmly against his cheeck.
"Why you sad?"
"I don't want to lose you..."
"You won't. I am the strongest in the universe; no one can beat me! And with you watching my back, I have nothing to fear!" He smiles widely, full of confidence and reassurance in his words.
Macaque felt his heart squeeze tightly in his chest as a lump formed in his throat that he swallowed with force.
"What if I am not here?"
"Uh? Of coursh you are! Why would you ever leave me? Silly~"
He says this like it's the most simple thing in the world, like it's so certain that Macaque would never leave the side of his King. And Macaque pressed his lips thin because it's true. What is he without Wukong? The Sun and the Moon. The King and his Warrior. They could never depart for too long without hurting for the presence of the other. And yet, Wukong left him time and time again, and Macaque stayed, waiting for his return just to see him get away again.
Macaque felt an ugly sensation bubbling in his gut, something vile wanting to lash out. He clenched his hands, squeezing the other he was holding, pricking the skin with his claws. His face scrunched, brow furrowed, mouth pulling into a silent snarl. The cord was pulling tautly, threatening to snap and unleash all he had held down.
"Mihuo?"
Wukong's voice calling his name so softly, almost worried, snapped him back to himself. He almost reeled back at seeing his reflection in the water, not recognizing himself in it. Something so vile, so filled with anger, that was not him.
He looked at Wukong; his expression was soft, confused, with his head tilted slightly to the side.
Macaque took a deep breath before smiling at him, letting his grip on his hands relax again.
"It's nothing. You are right. Better we dry ourselves and go to sleep."
"Oh, right. I wanna groom you later~" he said, getting up and leaving the water.
"Yeah, let's do this."
Once outside, Macaque took Wukong's hands and dropped them and the wet clothes back inside the mountain, right in their room. Wukong wobbled slightly but kept his ground as he walked to get some rags to dry them.
They dried themselves, ruffling their fur to get the water out, until they were semi-damp. They picked some pants, and Macaque laughed as Wukong fought to get both legs inside one hole. They sat in their shared nest, filled with soft blankets and animal pelts, all to create the best soft and warm bed they could have.
They spent the time in comfortable silence, grooming each other and letting out small chirps in their mother tongue, something they did only when alone or with their troop. That was something that Macaque missed; since the brotherhood formed, they spent less and less time using their mother language and more human language.
Sometimes he regretted teaching it to Wukong, just to think about how stupid of a thought it was. He would have learned soon anyway, with learning under Master Subodhi and traveling in the mainlands.
When they finished, they cuddled together in bed, Wukong's head on Macaque's chest and arms wrapped around him tightly.
"Wukong?"
"Mh?"
"What would you do if I am gone?"
"You won't."
"But what if I am not with you for a long period of time or ever again? What would you do if I were kidnapped? Hypothetically," he prodded, idly dragging his fingers through the other’s hair as he lifted it to look at them.
"I won't let them take you," he said with a conviction that made Macaque's heart skip a beat. "I would look for you until the ends of time."
They stared at each other for a long time, no one daring to drop the other's gaze.
"What if I left of my own volition? If it was my choice, would you hate me?"
Wukong stayed silent, and Macaque would have thought he fell asleep if he was not looking at him.
"I don't know. I know I would be sad without you; maybe at first I would be angry, but I think I'd miss you too much to not have you by my side again." he says sincerely, tilting his head to meet the scratch at his head.
His answer seemed to relieve Macaque slightly, but it also made it more difficult to let go.
"Why would you ever leave me? Aren't you happy with me?" he asks, rubbing his face on the other's chest.
"I am. You make me the happiest." Macaque reassure him reciving a hum in reponse.
"I don't want you to hate me," he murmurs as he stares at the ceiling, his voice wobbling with strain to keep it in control.
He wraps his arms around Wukong and tightly squeezes them against himself, drenching himself in their presence and smell.
"I love you."
"I love you too, plum."
Wukong snuggles more into their embrace, and after a breath, he is out cold, body slack as he loses himself in the sleep.
Macaque stays like this for a few moments, taking it all in, marking Wukong's presence in his mind. The softness of his fur, the weight of his body pressed to himself, his sweet scent of peaches.
Buddha, he is going to miss him so much.
With frightening care, he detangles himself from the other, replacing himself with a pillow to let him clutch at. With silent steps, he got up from the nest and gathered his clothes and traveling equipment.
Once dressed, he wrapped himself in his biggest scarf so that it would also function as a cloak, and retrieved a wide conical straw hat from the closet.
He looked back at Wukong and kneeled beside him to gingerly kiss his cheek, watching him smile in his sleep.
"I'm sorry." he whispers.
He looked around for the last time before shadow portaling himself outside the waterfall.
He slowly began to walk down the mountain, taking in its beauty under the moonlight, sealing it in his memory. He listened for the troupe sleeping in the trees, for the nocturnal animals walking in the forest.
When he arrived at the beach, he stopped by their tree, one of the oldest on the mountain, and caressed its trunk nostalgically. He took from his bag a small box; inside it were his last goodbyes to his other half, and he left it under the tree.
Looking forward to the sea, he takes a few deep breaths, and beginning to tremble slightly, he takes the last step to completely leave his home behind. He closes his eyes, and when he opens them, he is looking at a different forest, on a different mountain from different lands.
Like a rubber band snapping back, his whole body collapses on itself. His knees buckle under his weight, and he catches himself on trembling arms, breath ragged as his eyes burn and his vision blurs.
Deep from his throat, a wailing scream leaves its confinement. All that he tried to contain is let out as he becomes a wailing, sobbing mess.
Today he broke his heart and his loved ones with his own hands. And it's something he would never forgive himself for.
Light filtered through the window, and Wukong squeezed his eyes against it. He grumbled as he turned on the bed, lying on his stomach and throwing an arm to his right.
He furrowed his eyebrows as his arms hit nothing, and even after some patting, he still found nothing. He lifted his head and blinked at the empty space near him in confusion. The side of the nest where Macaque would always sleep was empty, which was strange, as he usually woke up before them.
What time was it? His head was killing him, but a good peach and some morning cuddles should do it.
"Mihuo?" he called as he sat up on the bed and stretched his arms. "Bud?"
No answer.
That was strange, but maybe he just went to tend to the troop before they left for heaven. He got up and idly picked up a shirt lying on the ground to smell it.
"Mh, good enough."
He took longer than he would like to admit to put the shirt on, his head dizzy from the fast movements. God, he really shouldn't have drunk that much yesterday.
He walks out of his room and walks through the corridors, calm steps as he tries to remember what he did last night. He is kind of sure he spilled some wine on himself; he remembers the strong smell and then the warmth of the hot springs. He should really thank Mihuo for helping him. After they win the war, he will gift him the most beautiful dress he can find in heaven.
He exits the water curtain cave and hops on the stone to the shore.
"Good morning, little ones! Today is the grand day!" he smiles at the little monkeys of the troop.
They immediately chirp and hoot at him in greeting but then look around after finding him alone.
"Mh? Oh, yeah, Mihuo woke up before me today. You didn't see him?"
They shake their heads, and Wukong furrows his eyebrows in confusion.
"What do you mean? He should be here; did he not meet you?"
The three monkeys looked at themselves before one stepped up.
"King, the Queen was not seen by the troop this morning."
"We were waiting for King to wake up! But Queen is not here?"
"Uh, maybe he is on the training grounds. Go eat with the others while I look for him," he says before whistling for his cloud and jumping on it.
He makes his way quickly to the training grounds while wondering where Mihuo went. Maybe he is meditating somewhere to calm his mind; he has been way too nervous about this war.
But when he arrives at the training grounds, all he sees is Niu working out, swinging his axe around.
"Brother! Did you happen to see Mi-Macaque somewhere?"
The Demon Bull King, Niu Mowang, stopped mid swing to turn and look at him, sweat falling from his brow.
"I did not see him. I thought you two were together like always."
Wukong feels a strange feeling growing in his gut but quickly waves it away and smiles at his sworn brother.
"He actually woke up before me today; I was looking for him."
DBK lifts an eyebrow at him, finding this very unusual.
"Maybe he is with Azure. The others were looking through the weapons and armor, so there won't be problems during the fight."
"You are right! Mac has always been anxious about this things. Thanks, see you later!"
With a relieved smile, Wukong flies off in the direction of the armory back inside the cave. How silly of him. Obviously, Mac would check every detail before a battle. The moment he sees him, he will drag him away for breakfast; he bets he missed it like always.
Nearing the armory, he hears voices talking, and he enters with a booming call.
"Hey Mac! Buddy, I was-huh?"
Looking around, the only people he sees are Azure, Peng, and Yellow Tusk. They all look at each other with wide eyed expressions, not expecting the sudden entrance of Wukong.
"Wukong? Didn't expect to see you here," Azure tells him, setting down the scroll he was holding.
Wukong doesn't respond immediately, still looking around, expecting his best friend to pop out of the shadows.
"Yeah...did you see Macaque, per chance? This morning?"
"Not really, I thought you two were together."
"Indeed, I have not seen our brother since last night," agrees Yellow Tusk.
Wukong feels his hands clammy, and he quickly wipes them on his legs. He was ready to go look for him somewhere else when a snort stopped him in his tracks.
"I bet that simian ran with his legs between his legs like a coward. Pathetic." Peng sneers from his place on a crate, sharpening his spear.
Wukong feels his heart pound as he awkwardly laughs at them.
"Haha, good joke. I better go look for him; he must be meditating somewhere quiet before the battle."
After that, he leaves and strongly pretends not to hear Yellow Tusk's wonder why Macaque would meditate now when he never did before.
He flies fast out of the cave and begins to look for them in every place he knows.
"Macaque? Macaque!"
He looks in the orchards, at the cliffs, above the mountain.
"Mihuo? Come on, it's not funny!"
He looked under every rock, above every tree, and into every cave.
"Mihuo!"
He was breathing fast, his heart pounding as he thought about every possible scenario. Maybe he got lost in a new part of the island. Impossible; they mapped and went to every nook and cranny of this place. Maybe he is recharging in his shadow realm. He never mentioned the need to do this before.
Maybe he—he—!
Fuck! Where was he?!
He must have told him something last night, some clue or request. He needed to remember!
"Come on, think! You are not the smart stone monkey for nothing!"
Last night, last night...
They definitely went to the spring after the party. Then-then... they talked! About what?!
"Think, think, think, think-"
He-he told him he loved him-or something like that. Then Mihuo asked him something-something that made him cry.
"Ugh! He was crying! I told him I loved him like some silly goose! Then he asked me about-heaven!"
Yes, that's right! He asked him about the war with heaven! He reassured him like always! Then he promised him they would win and stay together forever. And then they went to bed-
"Agh!! Why is it so difficult to remember! I am never going to touch alcohol ever again!"
He descended with his cloud so he could pace in the sand.
"In bed, in bed, in bed-we groomed each other! Then he asked me something?"
Why did Mihuo ask him so many questions last night? He was too wasted! Was this the prank!? Make him regret drinking ever again?!
Not funny!
"Mac! It's not funny anymore! I swear I am gonna punch you the moment I lay my eyes on you!" he shouted into the air, knowing the other could hear him if he wanted.
Oh, he was so angry right now! He would surely get him back for this! He will-
The memory hit him like lightning.
"What if I left of my own volition? If it was my choice, would you hate me?"
Wukong stared at the sand, his body rigid and breath held as the conversation unfolded in his mind.
"I don't know. I know I would be sad without you; maybe at first I would be angry, but..."
"...I would be angry..." he whispered, incredulous.
He didn't. He wouldn't. He-!
"-left."
His breath started to become shallow and fast as the realization hit him.
Mihuo left him. He left the mountain! He-he-
"AAAAGGHHH!"
He screamed.
"How could he leave?! He left me?! Like this?!"
Suddenly, he saw red and felt a burning sensation before he quickly closed his eyes.
"SHIT! LOOK WHAT YOU MADE ME DO! Making me use my laser sight for the first time since I was born!" he screamed in pain.
Motherfucker! He needed to calm down.
Breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out...
He counted until 45 before he could feel himself taking back control of his powers. He blinked and flinched as the light hurt his sensitive eyes. His hands were still trembling, clenched in contained anger, feeling his claws pricking at his skin. Think straight; he needed to think straight.
"He wouldn't leave like this; he would-no, he wouldn't! He-he left something! He has to!"
He was pretty sure that his smile was bordering on delirious, but he didn't care at the moment. He was gonna find him and never let go of him. Ever again.
"Eheheh. That's right. I'll just take him back! He must have left a message for me somewhere."
Where didn't he look? Where, where?
A grin stretched across his face as he finally got the answer right.
He somersaulted through the beach, and in a matter of seconds, he was before their tree. Why hadn't he come here before? So silly of him.
"A message, a message. Where is it?"
He started to look at every inch of the tree and near it, digging in the sand for something, anything. He didn't know how long he had been doing it, but the delirious denial of before had turned into despair.
Tears of blood fell from his eyes, damaged by the laser from earlier, and in his internal chaos, he didn't hear the footsteps approaching behind him until a voice called out to him.
"Wukong?"
"Mihuo!"
He snapped his head back, but his expression quickly melted away when he found Azure looking at him with a worried face.
"So, it is true. Macaque is gone."
"No! He is not! He just-he-I will take him back! He is not gone!" Wukong shouted as he started digging again.
He flinched when a big hand landed softly on his shoulder, grounding him for a moment as his hands stilled and his chest heaved.
"Brother, you won't find anything here," Azure told him, and Wukong clenched his jaw hard.
"How do you know?! You don't know Macaque like I do! He wouldn't leave without telling me something!"
Azure just looked at him sadly before scowling his face back with resolution.
"I had been looking for you. I already searched this place two times before finding you here. If something was there, I would have found it."
Wukong's chest hurt; his heart was being torn apart the more time passed.
"Nothing?" he weakly said, almost afraid of the answer.
"I am sorry, brother, but Macaque has decided to abandon us and our cause," he then said grimly. "But more especially, he abandoned you."
Abandoned...?
"...no...he..."
"He did. Look at you; he clearly chose to leave you like this because he wanted to hurt you. No words of goodbye, nothing."
He left! Macaque left!
These words began to storm in Wukong's mind as he started spiraling in his emotions.
"That—ARGH!" Wukong screamed in frustration as he punched the ground, lifting sand into the air.
"He left! Just like this?!" he started to pace again. "Traitor! Scumbag! Fucking liar! How could he do this to me? I thought we were friends!"
"Apparently not enough."
"We spent centuries together! Went on adventures together! Played, pranked, and eaten-we groomed each other!"
"A sly demon for sure. Using you for their means."
"I know!" he turned around to look at Azure. "I swear to God that when I find him, I am gonna fucking kill him! Right now!" he snarled as he heaved from exertion.
"Yes, you shall make him pay for this," Azure said as he circled Wukong. "He tricked you into thinking you were friends. And when things didn't go as he wanted? He left you."
Damn right he did. He was just a manipulating demon.
Azure stopped before Wukong and placed his hands on his shoulders, making him look into their eyes.
"He didn't trust you to win against the Jade Emperor. He insisted and claimed that we would fail. I say we show him he's wrong."
...yes...he will show Mihuo that he was wrong. Then, when he is the new emperor, he will chase him down and show him who was right in the end.
"Let's dethrone the Jade Emperor," he growls, ready to free himself of his pent-up energy.
He whistles and jumps on his cloud, not waiting before speeding to his cave.
Azure watched him leave, humming thoughtfully as he took a small wooden box from inside his shirt. He opened it, looking at its contents with a grimace. He took the folded paper and read it through one last time before scrunching it up and throwing it away with the box.
He started walking back, resolution on his shoulder as they would soon fight against heaven. Behind him, the box rested in the sand, the wind rustling the crumbled letter near it.
Meanwhile, in a faraway mountain, a black monkey lowered its hat as the wind blew against them, making them shiver slightly. The city was near and night was approaching and he looked longingly at the sky before resuming his walk.