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Yu is, at this point, no stranger to fear. He and his friends have been risking their lives on a regular basis for months at this point; he can pretty confidently say he knows fear. It lives in every shadowed corner of the TV world and every fog-covered night of Inaba; it bares its teeth in every too-short breath when an ally’s weakness is struck and every pounding heartbeat when the Midnight Channel activates. And surely Yu has had his own share of the more deeply personal brand of fear—the kind that showed itself when threat letters began appearing in Dojima’s mailbox, when Nanako was kidnapped, when Dojima nearly lost his life trying to catch Namatame. Yu has felt that kind of blood-chilling fear as well, more than he cares to admit, and he knows it well enough.
But absolutely nothing can prepare him for the way his heart damn near stops when his phone rings and it’s from the hospital. A place which only has his number in case of emergency.
He has no words for the way he flinches at the caller ID or the way he trembles as he accepts the call and lifts the phone to his ear, pulse erratic, already dreading whatever the doctor on the other end of the line will say. His friends shield him from other customers’ prying eyes with concerned expressions of their own, and Yu can’t even meet their eyes—
“Is this Narukami Yu?”
“Yes,” Yu says quickly. “Yes, that’s me—what is it?”
“We need you to come to the hospital right away,” the doctor says. His voice is even, but only barely so. “As soon as possible, please.”
Yu forgets how to breathe for a second. “Is Dojima’s condition worse?”
This time, the doctor’s reply is painfully heavy: “Not Dojima-san—it’s Nanako.”
He doesn’t hear whatever follows; Yu hangs up and lowers the phone, ears ringing.
Nanako....
“I have to go,” Yu says.
Immediately Yosuke is at his side, eyes wide, reaching to put a hand on his shoulder: “What’s wrong? What happened?”
“I need to get to the hospital right now.”
His friends go still, except for Yosuke, who simply nods and says, “Let’s go, then. C’mon.”
Yu grabs Yosuke’s hand like it’s a lifeline and takes off in a run, Yosuke right alongside him as always; through the haze of panic in Yu’s mind, he can hear the others following close behind without question or hesitation, the same way they’ve always followed him through dungeon after dungeon in the TV world, the same way they’d followed him straight through the TV to find Nanako when Yu couldn’t wait a second longer to look for her. It’s a reassurance that he’s not alone, but a minor one against the racing of his heart and mind, the cold dread of what awaits him. Yosuke’s hand is the only grounding force, steady even though Yu’s grip is probably far too tight to be comfortable for Yosuke.
Something terrible is waiting for him. Yu knows this in his heart.
Still he runs as if getting there quickly enough will prevent what he fears, until they actually get to the hospital and up a flight of stairs, and there’s a doctor waiting down the hall in front of what he knows is Nanako’s room. Yu almost stumbles, then, and Yosuke’s quick to take over—he pulls Yu the rest of the distance down the hall, calling something back to the rest of the team that Yu doesn’t process in the slightest as they practically skid to a halt in front of the doctor.
“I’m afraid only family is allowed inside,” the doctor says.
“He’s family,” Yosuke answers at once, squeezing Yu’s hand for a brief moment before letting go to gesture to the door. “That’s his sister in there.”
The doctor’s eyes widen slightly. “Ah, Narukami-kun.”
Yosuke turns to Yu and says, “Go. We’ll be outside if you need us.”
Yu nods gratefully at him and rushes into the hospital room.
There’s two nurses in a low conversation next to the screen monitoring Nanako’s vitals, but Yu ignores them both to hurry to Nanako’s side, scanning her up and down for any sign of pain. Her breathing is shallow and her skin too pale; she looks just as unwell as when they’d found Namatame holding her hostage, and Yu’s chest tightens painfully at the reminder of why she’s here at all.
“Nanako,” he whispers. “I’m here, your big brother’s here.”
“Narukami-kun, we need you to talk to her,” one of the nurses says from behind him. “Keep her conscious. We’ll do all we can. We’ve sent for Dojima-san as well.”
Yu doesn’t reply directly, but he takes one of Nanako’s small hands into both of his own and speaks again, a bit louder: “Can you hear me, Nanako? It’s Yu.”
Nanako stirs just barely, eyes fluttering partway open; Yu forces his grip on her hand to remain loose.
“Big...bro?” Nanako murmurs. “You came...?”
“Of course, you’re my sister.” Yu tries to suppress the trembling in his own voice in what is probably a very futile attempt not to worry her. “I need you to stay awake for me, okay?”
Soft brown eyes barely manage to focus on his face as Nanako says faintly, “It hurts...I’m scared. Please don’t leave....”
“I’m not going anywhere, I promise. I’m right here,” Yu says. His hands are shaking now, too badly to possibly hope Nanako can’t tell. “Please just stay with me, okay? Everything’s going to be okay, you’re gonna be alright, just focus on my voice. Stay awake for me. Dad’s on his way, the doctors are getting him for you.”
Behind him, the heart monitor starts beeping rapidly. Yu tries to block it out, but he can’t—it’s a mirror of his own heartbeat, panicking as his sister’s breathing shallows even further, a sure indicator of Nanako slipping out of his reach—
No, don’t go, please don’t give in.
“It’s gonna be okay, Nanako, just hold on a little bit longer,” Yu says desperately, unable to look away from Nanako’s face. “Please just hold on, until Dad gets here at least.”
The nurse, suddenly: “Get out of the way—help me with this!”
No, not yet, Dojima still isn’t here!
Yu can’t move, paralyzed by a new kind of terror he’s never felt before. The doctor is rushing around to the other side of Nanako’s cot, the heart monitor keeps beeping, and someone stumbles into the room with heavy, uneven footsteps; Yu’s grip on Nanako’s hand tightens as his throat starts to close up, struck by too much emotion for Yu to possibly describe.
“Where is she?” Dojima’s rough voice demands. A moment later he’s at Yu’s side, focused only on Nanako: “Can you hear me, Nanako?”
The heart monitor switches from rapid beeps to a shrill, drawn-out note. Yu’s heart promptly shatters in his chest.
She’s gone.
The doctor says something in their general direction; Yu doesn’t hear a single word, ears ringing too loud for him to possibly make out anything coherent. Dojima has fallen to his knees, and Yu’s entire body is shaking, and Nanako is so still, so lifeless—
“Nanako,” Yu says hoarsely. “I’m sorry.”
He isn’t listening to whatever the doctor is trying to tell him and Dojima—he can’t listen; what’s the point? What does it matter? Nanako’s heart has stopped, she isn’t breathing, and nothing else matters to Yu other than that he’s losing his little sister, the girl he risked his life to rescue with no regard for his own safety. He and his friends tried so hard to get her back in time, and now it’s for nothing, it doesn’t matter anymore—they failed her.
Yu failed her, and he already knows he’ll never be able to forgive himself for it.
That realization is the only thing echoing through his mind, drowning out Dojima’s broken cries and the doctor’s words, right up until someone starts to pull him to his feet. Yu tries to resist on instinct, but the grip on his upper arm is as firm as it is familiar, and eventually he has to turn to face Yosuke, whose gaze is immensely pained but steady despite the tears welling up in Yu’s eyes against his will.
“I’m sorry,” Yosuke murmurs, brushing his thumb against Yu’s uniform sleeve. “I’m so sorry, partner.”
Yu throws his arms around Yosuke’s torso and buries his face in the crook of Yosuke’s neck with a sob; immediately Yosuke returns the hug, one hand on Yu’s back keeping him firmly in place while Yosuke gently cards the other through Yu’s hair in soft, soothing motions. He doesn’t so much as wince from Yu’s fingers digging harshly into his back or the way Yu shudders so badly in his arms, and the steady warmth Yosuke offers is the only thing that’s keeping Yu from collapsing to the floor from the nearly unbearable grief clutching his very being, the pain he can’t escape.
There’s a Nanako-shaped hole in his life now, after all—there can be no escape from that.
⬥ ⬦ ⬥
Some time passes in a haze. Yu has no way to tell how much, and he doesn’t care.
At some point Yosuke has to release him, guiding him gently back outside of the hospital room. Yu can’t meet any of their friends’ gazes, so Yosuke addresses them in a quiet, solemn voice, keeping a tight grip on Yu’s hand once again; the exact words of their responses are lost in the haze of the grief, but Yu thinks they’ve offered condolences. They’ve all cared for Nanako too—Yu is far from the only one who loves her—but they seem to understand that it’s different for him, having fully accepted her as his little sibling within moments of meeting her and having done everything in his power to take his “big bro” role seriously ever since. Eventually Dojima stumbles past as well, headed down the hall; Yu barely registers this in his mind, and he certainly doesn’t question it—Dojima is technically still a patient here too.
That is, he doesn’t question it until Adachi appears and notes aloud that Dojima’s room isn’t in that direction.
Yu doesn’t process the implication immediately, but Yosuke does. Barely a moment later Kanji has Adachi by the lapels as Yosuke urgently asks where Namatame’s room is. Only once Adachi stammers out a room number does Yu connect the dots to what’s happening, to what a clearly rage-stricken Dojima has set off to do, and Yu forces himself to focus enough to see his friends trading panicked glances.
“We have to stop him,” Yukiko says quickly. “We need to hurry.”
“Come on,” Yosuke tells Yu. Then, to Rise: “Lead the way, navigator.”
Rise nods determinedly and says, “Follow me, everyone.”
She takes off at a quick jog; Yu and Yosuke hurry close behind, the rest of the group following once again. Rise leads them around a corner and up two more flights of stairs—only the months’ worth of experience spent moving up and down through areas of the TV world keeps Yu from stumbling again, or losing his breath too much—and then she turns down a side hallway into a wing Yu didn’t know existed; Yosuke nearly slips on the linoleum from the sudden change of direction, but Yu yanks him back upright by the arm on pure instinct as Rise signals for them to stop a moment later, eyes narrowed as she sticks her head around the next corner.
“What’s wrong?” Chie gasps, barely avoiding crashing into Kanji.
“Dojima-san’s trying to force his way in,” Rise says. “The room’s guarded by a pair of officers that are trying to hold him off, but he’s determined....”
“We gotta get him back to his room,” Kanji says, “but how do we do that?”
“I don’t think he’s likely to listen to any of us,” Naoto sighs. “He’s angry and hurt, and he wants either answers or vengeance from Namatame, or possibly both. I can’t say I blame him for it, either.”
“I could go for some answers too,” Yosuke says grimly, “but Adachi’s almost definitely trying to catch up with us, and no way he’d let either Dojima-san or us inside that room.”
“Adachi-san doesn’t have all that practice running up and down stairs that we have,” Naoto says. “Even so, we don’t have much time. What are we going to do?”
They direct this last bit at Yu, who has to blink for a moment, surprised to be addressed; then he processes the question and the context and grimaces, running his free hand through his hair with a sigh.
“We need to get Dojima out of here before he pulls his stitches, or does something he’ll regret later,” Yu says, wincing at the rough quality of his voice. “But...he deserves answers, and I want to get them for him. I need to talk to Namatame. I have to know why this happened.”
“So we split up,” Yukiko says at once. “A few of us take Dojima-san back to his room, and the rest of us work out how to distract the officers away from the door. One of us will probably have to divert Adachi, too.”
“I might be able to bluff a way inside the room for Yu and myself, but we shouldn’t risk being overheard talking about the TV world,” Naoto says pensively. “So luring the officers away is probably our only option.”
Rise whips around, then, and hisses, “I hear footsteps!”
Kanji curses under his breath and yanks open the nearest room door, then says, “It’s empty, everybody in!”
The entire group scrambles into the room; Kanji holds the door almost-closed so they can listen with bated breath as Adachi runs past, oblivious to their presence. Yu’s grip on Yosuke’s hand tightens; Yosuke absently brushes his thumb across the back of Yu’s hand in turn.
“Dojima-san!” they hear Adachi exclaim from around the corner. He sounds worn out, but also relieved to have found Dojima as he adds, “What do you think you’re doing? You shouldn’t be running around yet, you’ll reopen your wounds!”
Dojima’s response is only partly audible, the words unclear but his furious tone very distinct. Everyone turns to Rise, who has the best hearing out of the group; her brows furrow slightly as she nods to Naoto.
“You werer right,” she whispers, “he wants both answers and revenge. Adachi’s trying to convince him back downstairs—”
She’s cut off by a broken shout from Dojima.
“Why does he get to live when Nanako doesn’t?!”
Yu’s breath catches, tears welling up again at the reminder of the unfairness of this entire situation, but he doesn’t dare move still. Yosuke offers him a soft glance but doesn’t speak either.
“We need to wait for Adachi to get him out of here,” Rise says, still quiet.
“Even if he does, the guards probably won’t leave,” Chie protests. “They wouldn’t dare leave a suspect unguarded, right?”
“Not unless there’s a bigger threat for them to handle,” Naoto says. Then their eyes widen. “Wait, that’s it. We have to fabricate a threat.”
“Without getting caught? I dunno about this,” Chie says.
“We’ll just have to coordinate really well,” Yu says, squaring his shoulders. “I need answers, for both Dojima and myself.”
“If we split into groups, one person from each group can be in a call with me so I can navigate,” Rise suggests. “How many do we need?”
“Naoto and I should stay here, so we can convince the guards to leave if they don’t believe the threat. Other than that, we need a group to stage the threat and someone to wait nearby to make sure they’ve left this wing,” Yu says. “Rise, you should be in that group. Yukiko, stay with her just in case. Yosuke, Chie, and Kanji, you three will handle the threat. Where’s Teddie?”
“He stayed downstairs in Nanako’s room,” Yukiko says. “He blames himself.”
“He’s not the only one,” Yu murmurs. Then, at a more normal volume: “Are they gone, Rise?”
Rise listens intently again for a moment, then nods. “They must be headed down the back staircase—not the one we took.”
“The easiest threat to fabricate without getting caught would be some kind of suspicious bag left in a conspicuous location,” Naoto says. “Essentially a fabricated bomb threat. They’ll be forced to investigate—especially since we’re at a hospital.”
“My school bag is back downstairs, by where we were waiting outside Nanako’s room,” Yosuke says. “If we’re careful, we can grab it, and stuff it with our jackets or something. I’ll make it work.”
“I’ll open a call with you and Naoto, then,” Rise agrees. “We should hurry—Adachi might decide to look for us.”
“Let’s go, then,” Yu says. “We’ll meet back up in front of Namatame’s room as soon as we can.”
⬥ ⬦ ⬥
The plan goes remarkably well. They’re all reconvened in front of Namatame’s room within fifteen minutes thanks to Rise’s guidance—apparently she’d taken the time to learn the entire layout of the hospital when Nanako had first been admitted—and although Yosuke, Chie, and Kanji are all slightly out of breath, having gone down to the lowest floor and back up in a relatively short time, they’re all still visibly determined as they follow Naoto into the room.
It’s a fairly nice room, all things considered. It’s rather large; although the lights are off, there’s a bit of moonlight from the windows, allowing them to see the general contents and layout of the room—including both a large luxury television at the far end of the room and Namatame himself, scrambling to try to open one of the windows. Chie shouts in surprise, and she and Kanji rush over at once to pull Namatame away from the window; Yukiko quickly checks the window mechanisms to ensure they’re tightly locked, while Naoto and Yosuke make sure to block Namatame’s line of sight to the door.
“What do you think you’re doing?” Yu says sharply, almost instinctively reaching for a katana that doesn’t exist.
“It’s you kids?!” Namatame yelps, too surprised to resist Kanji shoving him closer to the group. “The ones who could go into the other world?”
“Damn right it’s us,” Yosuke says. “Don’t try to run. Seven of us and one of you—I think we can take you.”
“We’re here for answers, Yosuke-senpai,” Rise reminds him. “Calm down.”
Yu clenches his fists. “It’s us, yes. And that was my little sister you kidnapped, so you’re going to tell us what we want to know.”
“No! No, I—she was in danger!” Namatame pleads. “I had to save her, I had to protect her—that world was safer—!”
“You kidnapped her!” Chie says indignantly.
“I was trying to help her—”
“Stop trying to justify your actions,” Yu interrupts. “That world isn’t safe, and you took Nanako in there. My sister is dead because of you. So you need to tell us why you’ve been doing all this, and why you’ve been targeting us. Almost all of us have nearly died because of you.”
“No, no—that’s not right,” Namatame says, but it’s really more of a terrified sob at this point. Yu’s heart twists with disgust. “I was only trying to help—I had to save her....”
“You hid your tracks well,” Naoto suddenly says. Their voice is unusually cold, drawing the group’s attention to them as they continue. “You hid in plain sight, so that we couldn’t catch you. And your particular methods would be untraceable to anyone else—anyone except us, of course. Your victims would never know what happened to them, and there would be no way for us to even determine the exact cause of death. The perfect serial crime, I’d say.”
They take one step forward, then another. Rise flinches at the icy fury in Naoto’s eyes, and even Kanji looks wary; Namatame starts to push himself backwards on the floor before seemingly thinking better of it. Yukiko glances nervously between Naoto and Namatame, eyes wide.
“But you made a fatal mistake. You hurt someone we care about,” Naoto says, still glaring down at Namatame. “Nanako-chan was like a sister to all of us. She was Yu’s sister. You crossed a line.”
“Naoto,” Rise quietly interjects.
“This is a luxury suite—rather undeserved for a criminal like yourself. Most hospital rooms don’t have this much space. They certainly don’t have such a large television,” Naoto continues, undeterred, still impressively even despite the cold tone. “In fact, that television could easily accommodate an adult man without resistance. Not that anyone would ever know, of course. After all, who would believe that a person could enter a TV? And it’s very difficult to get back out of that world without help.”
Yu’s blood runs cold, but Kanji beats him to a response: “What’re you talking about, Naoto?”
“They’re right,” Yosuke speaks up, also watching Namatame. Unlike Naoto, his eyes are burning, his own display of anger that Yu has only rarely seen before. “No one would have a clue what happened. There would be no tracks, just like with what you did, you bastard. No one would ever find you—not before the Shadows could, anyways.”
“Stop it,” Yukiko says loudly. “You’re both out of your minds.”
“Justice would be served,” Naoto says. “He’d pay for what he did to Nanako, and to all of us.”
“At the cost of making us murderers! We’d be no better than him!”
“He kidnapped you too, Yukiko,” Chie argues, crossing her arms. “Half of us got kidnapped by this douchebag, and we would’ve died too if Yu didn’t rescue us!”
“Yeah, but—this still isn’t right,” Kanji insists. “It doesn’t sit right with me, Chie-senpai. We spent all that time tryin’ to stop this guy from throwing more people in. We can’t just turn around and do the same shit he did, especially knowin’ what it’s like in there.”
“He’s right,” Rise quickly says, “we can’t do that. It’s not right.”
“That didn’t stop him from taking Nanako!” Yosuke shoots back. “What does it matter if we trade one life to save potentially dozens more?! He’ll never be able to hurt anyone ever again.”
Yu finally forces himself to speak: “Stop that.”
“We wouldn’t even be killing him ourselves,” Yosuke says, turning towards Yu with clenched fists. “The Shadows would take care of it. He couldn’t hurt any of us again.”
“You could leave the room,” Naoto adds with a hint of sharpness. “You wouldn’t be complicit. As far as you’d know, nothing ever happened. Only Yosuke-senpai, Chie-senpai, and I would be liable. The rest of you can have plausible deniability.”
“Hell no—we’re a team,” Kanji says, “we gotta decide together.”
Yukiko shakes her head fiercely and says, “I’m not okay with this. I don’t want to be involved in anything like this!”
“You’re the deciding vote, and you’re our leader,” Yosuke says. He’s still holding Yu’s gaze. “Just say the word, and I’ll handle it.”
“Don’t you dare!” Rise retorts. Her eyes are glistening slightly. “You know this isn’t right, senpai!”
“Wait. Everyone just—wait a minute,” Yu says. “We have to talk about this.”
Yosuke shakes his head angrily. “What is there to discuss? He’s the reason Nanako got hurt. Don’t you think he deserves it?”
“Stop. We’re missing something.”
“Like what? What is there to possibly miss?”
“We don’t have the whole picture about Namatame’s intentions,” Yu insists.
“What does it even matter?!” Yosuke says impatiently. “Dojima is hurt and Nanako is dead because of him! You have the chance to avenge your family, and you’re hesitating? Make a choice, Yu!”
“You can’t put that choice on me!” Yu screams, broken and raw.
Everyone else flinches away, including the now-subdued but clearly still afraid Namatame. Yosuke’s impatient expression is replaced by shock, mirrored on the others’ faces as well, and Rise inhales sharply as tears spill down Yu’s cheeks for the second time tonight. Yu’s breathing is heavy and his pulse too quick, but he keeps glaring at Yosuke as he forces the tension out of his shoulders.
“Do not put that choice on me,” Yu says roughly. “Don’t you dare ask me to choose whether to become a murderer for my family’s sake.”
Yosuke searches his expression for a long moment, gaze slowly losing its heat. Yu sighs, long and tired, and tries to straighten up as best he can.
“We’ve been through enough already. I’ve been through enough already,” Yu says, suddenly weary. “I’ve already had my family threatened and hurt because of my actions in the TV world. He hurt Nanako, yes, but it was because of me. I chose to keep going in to save the people he was kidnapping. You all followed me, but I’m the one who led the charge. Nanako was targeted because I refused to stop. She’s dead because when Namatame carried out that threat, I promised to bring her back in time and I failed. I didn’t hurt her—I just didn’t save her, either. I already can’t forgive myself for that. Do you really think that, after I failed my little sister, I could really live with myself if I then turned around and hurt someone else?”
“Yu-senpai....” Yukiko murmurs.
“I....” Yosuke sighs. “Dammit.”
“I may be our leader, but I’ve always tried to make sure we decide things as a group,” Yu tells him. “You know that. But I’m not going to negotiate on this. Yes, I’m angry at Namatame, and yes, I’m grieving Nanako, but this is one line that I will not cross. She would never forgive me if I became a killer on her account.”
Something achingly sad settles in Yosuke’s expression. The others glance at each other, then back at Yosuke, waiting to see his response.
“You’re right,” Yosuke says quietly. “Of course you’re right. Yu...I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking clearly.”
“I know,” Yu says, only half as firm. “I’m sorry too. I didn’t mean to shout.”
“No, I—you were right to do it. I deserved it.” Yosuke hesitates, then offers a hand. “I’m really sorry. I shouldn’t have said any of that. It’s not fair for me to use your grief against you. I promise, it won’t happen again.”
Yu ignores the offered hand in favor of simply pulling Yosuke into another bone-crushing hug, reminiscent of the one Yosuke had given him back in Nanako’s room. Yosuke lets out a startled half-laugh but returns the hug just as readily; the others collectively sigh in relief, and soon Yu and Yosuke are surrounded by the rest of their friends too, warm and steady and reassuring despite the tension from mere moments ago. Rise and Chie both laugh wetly, and even Naoto sounds oddly choked as they murmur an apology to Yu.
“We’re better than this,” Kanji sighs without any real exasperation. “No more nasty fights like this, alright?”
“No more,” Yosuke promises. “I’m sorry, everyone.”
“Just don’t ever do that again!” Rise replies.
Yu can feel Yosuke’s nod against his shoulder, and the way Yosuke’s thumb brushes against Yu’s spine in another silent apology. He responds by threading his own fingers into Yosuke’s soft bronze hair and pressing a kiss against the tiny bit of exposed skin on Yosuke’s neck, above his uniform collar, a gesture Yosuke immediately returns.
“I’m sorry for hurting you,” Yosuke murmurs, loud enough for only Yu to hear.
“I forgive you,” Yu quietly replies.
The group breaks apart again; Yu rubs the tears out of his eyes and offers Yosuke a small smile to support his words. Yosuke huffs another laugh, shaking his head in disbelief, but takes Yu’s hand again anyways.
“We’ll figure out what we’re missing,” Yosuke says. “We’ll stick to what we’ve been doing—finding the truth, and pursuing justice. And I promise I won’t falter again. I’ll be with you to the end, partner.”
Yu nods. “To the end.”