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1. The wish to feel his breath on my skin by LowPolyRen

   Fandoms: 崩坏：星穹铁道 | Honkai: Star Rail (Video Game)  

   • Explicit
   • Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
   • No category
   • Work in Progress

   14 Sep 2026

   Tags

   • Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
   • Mydei/Phainon (Honkai: Star Rail)
   • Mydei & Phainon (Honkai: Star Rail)
   • Phainon (Honkai: Star Rail)
   • Mydei (Honkai: Star Rail)
   • Other Honkai: Star Rail Characters
   • Phainon Needs a Hug (Honkai: Star Rail)
   • Phainon-centric (Honkai: Star Rail)
   • Trans Character
   • Alternate Universe - Modern Setting
   • Dead Dove: Do Not Eat
   • Angst and Hurt/Comfort
   • Angst and Tragedy
   • Childhood Memories
   • Fluff and Angst
   • This is an ode to a dead girl
   • they're broke ass bitches
   • sex stuff happens
   • Poetry
   • My Heart is on Full Display; One Drop of My Blood Feeds Each Memory; My Scars are Mine Alone to Bear
   • No beta we die like anaxa cackling and exploding into glitter
   • I don't do PhaiNaxa normally but there's a reason okay?
   • Caenis' is Phainon's mom because I don't want to make Audata look bad ever again
   • Check each chapter description plz
   • Phainon Has a Vagina (Honkai: Star Rail)
   • Phainon Has PTSD (Honkai: Star Rail)

   Summary

   Phainon is feeling things after the consultation for top surgery...

    

   CW: dysphoria, dysmorphia, description of child abuse, talk of suicide & depression, assault, drugging, etc
   This doesn't have an ending and has a "To be continued" at the end because the story is still... being written
   It will remain open-ended until it finds a good ending.
   Hopefully it finds one.

    

   This story is based heavily on the unfortunate reality of a person who buried the girl he used to be in a garden filled with flowers taken from his grandparent's houses.

   Language:

   English

   Words:

   75,868

   Chapters:

   41/?

   Collections:

   1

   Comments:

   6

   Kudos:

   33

   Bookmarks:

   8

   Hits:

   1,699