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Ilya had never really imagined his future including kids, he never thought he was gentle or stable enough for them. No matter if any time a relative brought around a child he was always thrilled to take the kid for an entire event, whether they were newborn or a teenager. He adored kids.
Even in public, when kids recognized him he was more talkative than ever. If he was noticed by adult fans he would take a picture and smile, maybe say thank you if they paid him a compliment. But every time young American boys saw him at a dinner, he would always be willing to speak to them. Many were interested in hockey and Ilya would never turn down an opportunity to try and help them improve.
He loved that they also found him funny. When he got to talk with kids he always found himself more open to jokes and dialogue than he ever did with even his close friends and teammates.
Every time he saw a kid with a Rozanov jersey in the crowd his heart beamed. It was his favorite part of his job.
It didn’t take Shane long to catch on when they started talking more. “Do you want kids?” Shane asked once.
“What?”
“I just feel like I see you enjoying your time more with kids around. Is that a thing?”
“Not ‘thing.’ Maybe. I don’t know, I would love to have kids around me more, but I fear I would not be a good father. Too angry, too ill, too rough,” he explained. “Make sense?”
Shane looked at Ilya like he was talking gibberish. For a moment Ilya mentally made sure he wasn’t speaking in broken Russian; he wasn’t. “No.”
“What you mean no?” Ilya asked.
“You’d be an amazing dad. I’ve seen you around kids. The week when you offered to race a group of children for fun and then bought them candy bars after you purposefully lost was the cutest thing I’ve seen a guy do maybe ever.”
“Fast kids!” Ilya insisted.
“Yeah, an eight year old can beat you in a swimming competition. There was a shark in the water, if I remember correctly.”
Ilya smiled. He remembered that well. He spent probably 45 minutes with that group of kids at the resort. They were all really cute, and funny beyond the language barrier. “Hey, little girl Esme was taking swim lessons. It's been decades since I learn to swim.”
“You’re forgetting to make sentences right, that’s how I know you’re lying,” Shane smiled.
“English is stupid language! Says nothing,” Ilya insisted. Shane giggled at him and pressed his lips to Ilya’s. “I’ve loved kids since I was young, but… I don’t know.”
Shane nodded. “Too bad you hate Hayden, his kids are the cutest things ever.”
“If I ever met him again with little ones maybe I’d resign my hatred.” Ilya took a moment. “Kids love me, kids think I’m funny, kids love to play, we have much in common.”
“I think you’d be such a good dad,” Shane told him quietly.
Bringing down his volume, Ilya replied “Thank you. But really, I could never bring myself to.”
Shane sighed. “I wish I could give you kids,” he seemed a little too bummed for it to be joke. “Like, on accident. Just so you’d do it.”
“If you were other father I might. Have beautiful babies, I trust you to be a mama.”
Shane scoffed. “Exactly how I would trust you to be a papa,” he imitated Ilya.
“Quiet. Let’s make some food?” he suggested.