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It started— okay, Pearl doesn't know when it started, just that it started somewhere.
Maybe it was with high school when she was called a slur, maybe that was it?
"You'd never make a good mother, too spastic." One of the kids, a galeborn, said with a mocking laugh.
"Yeah, and not pretty enough!" A merling added with a smirk. "No one would ever wanna love you."
To say it stung would be going lightly on her. It hurt, it was painful. She's dealt with her bipolar personality for as long as she can remember. The mania, the anger, the ups, the downs. But being called a horrible mother? That was awful.
So she gave up on the wish of being a mother for a long time. A long, long time.
Years later, she forgot about it — she didn't — until the Announcements happened.
Tango sat at his table as they prepared for a meeting. It was being held at Gem's base, a beautiful elven courtyard that she had quickly decorated with various tables.
It was nice to be out of the starting area of Xisuma's base for once, the meeting hall's long table always intimidated Pearl.
The moth wandered past Tango, eyeing him curiously. Was he shaking? Taking a closer look, yep, he absolutely was!
"Are you alright, mate?" She asks in a gentle tone.
"Ah!" Tango yelps as he jumps. "No I'm— I'm fine. I'm totally fine."
The netherborn laughs awkwardly and puts his hands onto the table, scratching at the tablecloth.
"Are you sure?" She asks with worry.
"Yeah, yeah, yeah!" Tango nods his head quickly. She swears she hears his neck pop… ow…
"If you need anyone to talk to, I'll be nearby." Pearl reassures.
"Lovely. I— I won't need that!" Tango laughs tensely. "Totally won't need it…"
"Alright then…" Pearl winces. "I won't bother you then…"
She walks away then, making her way to where her cousin, Grian, is perched on faer platonic boyfriend's wheelchair.
"Pearl!" Scar cheers. "How lovely it is to see you again."
"You saw me just today cleaning your trash out." Pearl says with a laugh.
"And? It's still lovely to see your smile!" The lion then tilts his head and frowns. "Why aren't you smiling by the way?"
"Tango is acting weird." Pearl says as she takes a seat on Scar's other side, a empty spot left to her right for whenever Gem is done cooking soup.
"More cagey than usual?" Scar asks.
"Yeah!" Pearl says with a nod. "It's—"
"Weird? Yeah, Impulse and Zedaph too." Grian notes. "Though to be fair, Zedaph's always been the odd one."
"True… where even is Impulse?" She asks as she looks around.
The tables are slowly filling out. xB has a Keralis lovingly leaning again him while Wels talks to Jevin and Hypno at the same table. False is grimacing as Ren and Doc speak. Bdubs taps his table as Etho watches Cleo and Joe Hills silently. Most everyone is here safe for—
"He's making soup with Gem in her kitchen." Mumbo says easily.
"Without me?" Pearl yells at the shapeshifter.
"Do you always expect them to cook soup together?" Mumbo asks.
"Yes?" Pearl shouts back.
Before anyone else can say another word, Gem and Impulse and whisking around delivering bowls to each table. Gem visits her own table last and Impulse is sat by his boyfriends seemingly as quickly as possible. Odd, a bit, but not unusual.
"Without me? Really?" Pearl asks Gem weakly.
Gem smiles tightly. "It's a secret!"
"But—"
Xisuma is tapping a fork to xyr glass, calling attention to the meeting.
“I know we have several topics to go over today, but there's someone who wanted to make a special announcement first and be the host tonight.” Xe reaches xyr hand out to someone at one of the tables. "Impulse?"
"Impulse?" Grian echoes beside her.
The demon easily walks up to podium, his tail swaying loosely behind him like a happy, yet relaxed cat. He takes the mic from Xisuma before turning to the crowd.
“I know I was brought up here for a major announcement first, but I–” Impulse turns to someone in the crowd with the brightest smile Pearl's ever seen on him. “I think someone else has something important to say first.”
Everyones heads turn slowly to the subject that Impulse points at, a shy little netherborn that she knows the imp-hybrids loves more than anything else: TangoTek.
The netherborn stands slowly, fiddling with the tablecloth then his hands. Pearl thinks she can see him taking a shaky breath.
“I'm– I'm sure not everyone knows, but for– for the past year or so, I– I've been– I've been trying to have a kid and–” Tango pauses for a beat, looking towards Zedaph. “And I'm– well, I've got– I'm expecting. Almost eleven weeks along so I'm– I'm roughly halfway through already…”
The silence is a stunned sort of thing, and then it's broken by cheers. Years of work had actually come to something this time!
Ren and Doc laugh brightly from their table near Pearl's, she turns to see them smiling. Doc almost looks proud while Ren's smile is filled with excitement as his tail goes this way and that.
"Oh, I just know Bdubs is proud of themself." Mumbo says with a laugh.
"Yeah, I bet he'll be flaunting it around soon enough." Grain replies before puffing up. "Look at me, I'm Bdubs! I'm the best dad on the server!"
The five of them laugh, but it's stops as Impulse coughs awkwardly to gather everyone's attention once more.
“I, uh… I also have a major announcement of my own .” Impulse says shyly, swaying from one foot to the other. “Skizz– Skizz's also pregnant! He's– him and our baby are actually the reason I haven't been on as much.”
Pearl can't help but feel like Impulse is bleeding with pride. He's smiling from ear to ear, his tail sways happily, he looks so happy! It's almost infectious, spreading to Pearl.
And, for a moment, she can't help but feel like she wants something like that for herself. Wants to feel the pride of being a soon to be parent, wants to feel the pride of getting some else pregnant. But all that comes out?
"This server has too many eggs!" She bemoans playfully.
"Oh, be happy for them!" Scar says as he pats her shoulder. "They're all having babies! Being fathers… it sounds lovely for them."
"It does…" Her voice turns to a murmur as she turns back to Impulse.
…
She wants that sort of pride…
"I want one." Pearl says one night in bed after having had a lovely bit of sex with Gem.
The dryad beside her tenses up, taunt as a rope. "What do you mean?"
"A baby? A child? Like Skizz and—"
Gem turns over, looking away from her. "Ask someone else..."
"Oh… okay…"
— ❁ – ❁ – ❁ —
For Scar, it started early on. Since he was a kid maybe?
Firstly, he was trans. A girl playing with dolls was nothing new. A girl pretending to mother a doll was nothing new. That desire following after transition wasn't new.
He wanted to be a father… and yet, and yet…
There was a vulpine nurse, a bitchy one that barely cared for him.
"You want to be a mother?" She had said with a barely hidden scoff.
"Yeah, what's wrong with that?" His voice was odd and squeaky from the few months he'd been on T.
The fox paused and looked him over harshly. "People like you don't make good parents." She had said snidely.
Stars, did that make his blood boil in that moment.
He never forgot it, grew angrier even. He let himself stew in that moment for years to come.
He'd be a father some day, his muscles be damned!
Scar hasn't thought about that in a long time, but the dual pregnancies have brought the memories back to the bubbling surface.
He ignores it as best he can, let himself focus on something else. Namely Tango, that poor guy has himself cooped up for months! Or, well, had been cooped up for months.
The netherborn had left the quiet safety of the noodles to open Decked Out 2, a lovely little game. But if anyone asked, Scar was more focused on the roundness of Tango's belly.
It had barely been shown off, an illusive little thing that Scar wanted to see more than anything.
Scar had been circled Tango for a while like the hungry lion that he was. Well, he isn't fully a lion, a tad bit of nature spirit genetics made him lose his mane in the fall like a dandelion. He was a dandelion-lion! Anyways!
“Like I said, a man can't help himself…” Ren said, but Scar wasn't fully listen, he just needed a good way in.
“Speaking of a man not helping himself and you being amazing.” Scar announces as he rolls up to them. “Can I just say how amazing you look?”
Tango jumps as he turns around with a squeak. "Oh?"
“And oh my, do you look amazing.” Scar can't help put coo as he comes ever closer, holding out a hand as he does. “Is it okay if I feel?”
“It's just an egg, Scar. There's nothing to feel.” Tango groans.
“So? I can still hold it up, right?" Scar says before observing Tango's belly. "Your back must be hurting from how low it's weighing.”
“What? Who– who said it was low?” Tango yelped with a awkward laugh. “It's– this is a normal height for–”
Odd… it was low, right? That's how baby bumps usually were this late in.
“Woah, hey, are you alright?” Ren asks as he puts his hand on Tango's shoulder.
“Yeah, totally. I'm fine.” The netherborn says as he brushes the wolf's hand away. “And yeah, I guess you can touch.
Scar can't help the chuff as he slips his hands under Tango's robes. His hands slide around the swell of it, taking in every detail and inch.
He tries to imagine how it would feel on himself, to have that weight in his belly, to feel the tautness as his baby moves. The little flutters of feeling from this imagined unborn baby.
It feels warm, fluffy, he wants to live in it for forever and never let go of it. But the only thing that comes from his slipped tongue?
“Oh, wow.” Scar says gently. “There's more than I thought there was.”
“Yeah, the robes do a lot of work to hide it.” Tango says with the barest hint of a growl.
Scar, taking note of the sound, pulls himself away and out of his imagination. He turns to Grian as the avian appears, a giddy smile on his face as he points to Tango's belly
“Grian, would you want one?”
The avian’s expression turns in an instant disgust as fae blurted out “ew, no!”
And if that didn't make Scar's heart shatter…
— ❁ – ❁ – ❁ —
It's easy for Pearl and Scar to come together, a quiet scheme built by a slap-dashed band of Hermits to get those idiots to rest before the 'Tangdubs' egg hatches.
It is even easier as the two are set to painting and interior design duty of the nursery.
"What do you think Bdubs' vision was?" Scar asks at some point, just to fill the air.
"The Moon Base?" Pearl responds as she looks at the sketch on the wall.
"Yeah, but at sunrise or sunset?" Scar point out.
The two of them both tilt their head. Both squint at it.
"Sunset." They announce together before yelping. "Oh? Why?"
"Because their color schemes of red and orange match a sunset?" Pearl says easily. "You?"
"Bdubs always said Tango was like a warm sunset." Scar says with a shrug.
They get to painting, focusing on opposite walls and looking away from each other.
At least that is until someone talks…
"You know… I almost wish I was making this for my own kid." Scar murmurs after a moment's pause.
"Funny, I was just thinking the same thing." Pearl laughs. "But I have no one to have a family with. Gem doesn't want kids."
"Grian doesn't want kids either!" Scar chirps almost happily as he turns back to her. "What if you and me had kids together?"
They're staring at each other before Pearl is hunching over his wheelchair. "I thought no one would ever ask me!"
Scar smiles ear to ear. Pearl laughs. They hold each other in a tight hug and prepare to make a plan together for the rest of their lives.