Chapter Text
For someone who was supposed to save the world in the next 24 hours, Will Byers felt completely useless.
Hopper’s small cabin was overflowing with people, all bustling around preparing for the final battle. It was odd, having everyone there. It was basically everyone from Hawkins who had dealt with Vecna or the supernatural in some way over the past couple of years. Gunshots echoed from where Nancy, Jonathan, Steve and Hopper were all training outside. Dustin was gesturing wildly to a complex looking map while Lucas listened half heartedly. El and Mike were off somewhere, probably together. Will knew that they had broken up months ago, but they still seemed so close. Joyce and Murray talked in hushed voices in the corner, occasionally glancing at Will standing in the corner.
Everywhere Will looked, someone was planning, or training, or doing whatever you do when the world may be coming to an end.
Will’s required no preparation, so there he stood, in the corner of the cabin, tapping his foot anxiously. He felt like a ticking time bomb, all this power crawling underneath his skin, but nothing to do with it but wait. Will’s job was to distract the entire army of Vecna so that El could have a clean path to him and finally kill Henry once and for all.
Easy right? After the fifth time Joyce glanced at Will with concern-filled eyes, he decided he couldn’t take it any longer, and walked across the room, opening the door to El’s room, which was blissfully quiet.
He sat on her floor, legs outstretched, and slipped his Walkman over his ears, and sighed deeply as the soft music soothed his brain. He looked around her room, realizing that he had never actually been in El’s Hawkins room. Her room was similar to her room in California, although now, instead of a shrine of Mike, she had pictures of all the important people in her life hung in various spots around her room. She and Will, arms wrapped around each other. She and Hopper, side by side. The Byers family before El had even joined them. It made Will smile how much they all meant to El. He had missed her in the past year. They barely saw each other between all of El’s training and Will’s school. It was so unlike California, where she would sneak into his room without him even noticing, and they would spend hours side by side in comfortable silence, usually with Will painting and El working on homework.
Looking at her walls, Will was filled with a deep fear that he had been trying to suppress. Will knew the real reason he was hiding in this room, all alone, rather than soaking in the time outside with his family and his best friends.
Will Byers was deeply scared.
Every time he looked at one of the faces behind the door, he didn’t see them in the present day, but he envisioned every awful way Vecna could take them from him.
When his mom hugged him, all he could envision was her blood-soaked clothes. When El smiled at him, all he could see was her screaming. When Dustin talked to him, all he could see was a demogorgon slashing through his ribs.
Will was terrified for every person he loved, so instead of facing that fear head-on and spending what may be their last moments together, he hid from them.
Here in the solitude of his sister's room, those thoughts took over. He couldn’t lose anyone today. He had to do everything perfectly, so he went over the plan in his head a couple more times. The plan was drilled into his head so solidly he could recite it on command, but going over it helped distract him from the thoughts, but only a little.
“Boys Don’t Cry” by the Cure started playing from his mixtape, which was ironic as Will felt his cheeks become wet from the tears he was trying to hold back.
He was just Will. The boy his father would tease because he wasn’t man enough. The boy who couldn’t stand up to his playground bullies. He couldn’t take down an army.
Will closed his eyes, trying to take deep breaths, but they weren’t helping.
The door to El’s room suddenly opened, and Will looked up to a lanky and awkward-looking boy crowding the doorway.
“Um..” Mike stared down at Will, “Is this seat taken?” He asked, gesturing to the ground beside where Will was sitting.
If he noticed the tears and panic attack that Will was in the midst of, he didn’t say anything.
Will slid the headphones off his ears and wiped the tears off his cheeks half-heartedly, “Go ahead.”
Mike smiled a little, and Will, like the idiot he was, felt his heart skip a little.
Mike settled down beside Will, his side fully pressed against Will’s.
Over the past year and a half, since the Byers moved back to Hawkins, Mike had been like this. Consistently seeking out will. Sitting beside him in group settings. Making contact, even just in little ways, like brushing his arm against Wills' or bumping his knee against his.
At first, when Robin had talked about ‘signals’ with Vickie that day in the hospital, Will had been given hope, because all Mike gave him were signals. Constantly and relentlessly. Will had attempted to put this theory to the test one day as they were standing in that field. He had tried to send a signal right back to Mike, as if that would do something, but he was just left embarrassed.
Will had accepted that that’s always the way they would be. Friends. Maybe friends in which one was in love with the other, and the other was so oblivious that he continuously pursued friendship rather than the normal reaction, disgust. Friendship was better than nothing. Will could accept that.
They sat in silence for about a minute before Mike let out a small laugh.
Will smiled a little despite himself. Mike always somehow made him do that.
“What’s funny?”
Mike looked away from Will, also seeming to look at the various photos on El’s walls.
“I don’t know. I just feel so useless right now.” He chuckled again, his eyes now fixed on the photo of Will and El.
Will opened his mouth to say something, to reassure Mike. The truth was that Mike was a little useless right now. He didn’t really have any job to accomplish or anything to contribute. He was on lookout duty, something a little pointless when the plan was to kill Vecna once and for all. It was just that whatever job they could give Mike, someone else could do a little bit better. Nancy was better with a gun, Steve was obviously stronger, Hopper had combat experience, Dustin was smarter than any of the party members, and, of course, Will and El had powers.
Of course, Mike wasn’t actually useless. Will needed Mike more than Will needed air, which doesn’t really make up a useless person, but the skill of making Will feel safe didn’t really help when killing an all-powerful monster.
Deep down, Will was glad that Mike was out of the way. Of course, he wasn’t any happier that it was any of his other friends more on the front lines, but Will felt a small comfort that at least Mike might be a little safer on the sidelines.
Still, Will was ready to reassure Mike, to tell him that, of course, he’s not useless. He’s still the heart. (He’s still Will’s heart, although Will wouldn’t add that part.)
Mike cut him off, “You don’t have to say anything or reassure me or whatever, I know I’m useless. I’m dealing with it.”
Now it was Wills’s turn to laugh, “Oh, that is what I was going to say. You’re useless. Why are you even here?”
Mike’s jaw dropped, but they were both laughing, “William Byers! How dare you!”
“I’m an honest guy.” Will was fully smiling now, and the tears on his cheeks were nearly dried.
“Hmm, well at least I’ve accomplished something.”
“What?”
“I’ve cheered you up a little, haven’t I?” Mike turned, making eye contact with Will, their faces only a few inches apart.
“It’s not your job to cheer me up.” Will replied, although he knew he was lying. That had always been Mike's job, and he did it exceptionally well.
Mike’s face got a little more serious. “How are you feeling?”
“Ah, great, just gonna try to save the world or whatever in a couple hours. Not nervous at all.”
At this, Mike’s smile completely disappeared, and Will saw in his eyes that familiar fear that Will had been viewing everyone else with.
Will knew how Mike was seeing Will.
Will, bones snapped and dismantled.
Will, his chest clawed open.
Will, blood seeping out of his open wounds.
Will knew he was the most likely to die in this final battle. He was the one facing down an army of demogorgons. He was the distraction.
In full truth, Will was comfortable with that.
If keeping the demagorgans away from El, from Lucas and Dustin, from Jonathan and his mom, and of course, from Mike, meant Will’s unfortunate demise, he was okay with that. If killing Vecna meant that by some weird hive mind logic, Will would die too, he was okay with that too.
Will viewed the facts like this:
1. He would most likely die today
2. His death would allow others to survive
2. Vecna would most likely die today, too
If it prevented the people Will cared about from dying those grisly deaths he had been envisioning, Will was comfortable with these facts.
Will knew that Mike was not, so he lied. “I’m gonna be fine,” Will whispered to him.
“You don't know that.” Mike whispered back.
Then Will saw something that broke him. A tear slid down Mike’s cheek.
“Mike.”
“Will.”
Will had nothing more to say, so he waited for Mike. That’s how their relationship had always worked. Mike talked, and Will listened. It had been that way since they were kids, and Will drew silly little pictures as Mike rambled for hours about a new comic he had read, or the campaign he was planning, or how his parents had annoyed him. Will had always liked the sound of Mike's voice, and Mike had always liked having someone to listen. That's just the way they were.
“I just..” Mike paused, as though the words were too difficult to say. “I can’t lose you again.”
With that one sentence, Will’s heart shattered.
Will Byers had always loved Mike Wheeler. That was another fact Will could add to the list. He wasn’t quite sure when he had started to love him, when it turned from friendship into this deeper thing. The seed was planted the first day they had met, and slowly, the roots burrowed deeper until the seed sprouted into something that looked suspiciously like love. In the past few years, that sprout had grown into a vine, slowly choking Will with the immense weight of it. Will had tried to prune it, but the only real way he could get rid of it was to pull it out by the roots, but the roots ran deep. He tugged and pulled at them, and sometimes when Mike ignored him or was cruel, it felt almost as though he had weeded out the roots, and then he went and said things such as these, and Will realized that he could never fully get rid of the plant.
Mike continued talking, “I lost you that first time obviously, but then it’s like,” he sighed with frustration, “Even when I got you back it's never like I fully got you back, because then I lost you again when you were possessed, which obviously that was worse for you, but it felt pretty shitty for me too. Then when I had you again…” His words were rambly and breathy and oh so Mike, and all Will could feel was the pressure of the vines, choking him.
Mike sighed again, “When I had you again I acted like an idiot. I should have been spending every minute with you but I ignored you and fought with you.”
Will didn’t know why Mike was doing this. He knew Mike had ignored him. He knew they both fought. He remembers it distinctly.
'It’s not my fault you don’t like girls.'
Mike was now barely breathing in between words, as if trying to get them out as fast as possible, “And then I was always with El, which was stupid I guess, but I just wanted to feel normal you know?”
Will really didn’t know. Mike was the normal one. Will wasn’t.
“I mean, of course, I love El, but not like that.” Mike, who had been staring at the wall in front of him, suddenly glanced at Will.
What does that mean?
Mike continued before Will could even think about what he was saying, “Well… anyways. Then you left for California, and I just… stopped talking to you. Which was entirely my fault, of course.”
Will chose this moment to interject, “That wasn’t entirely your..”
Mike cut him off, “Yes, it was. And then I got to California, and we were weird, and we were fighting, and I just didn’t know what to do. But it’s fine. It’s all fine because that’s all in the past now, and I finally have you back. I have my best friend back. I just..” He closed his eyes and leaned his head against the bed.
Sunlight filtered in lines through the cracks of El’s window, one beam landing perfectly across Mike’s face, and in that moment, on Will's sister’s floor right before what could quite possibly be the end of the world, Mike looked absolutely ethereal.
The vines crushed Will.
“I can’t go through that again, okay.” Mike finally choked out.
“Mike, I'm not entirely tracking what you’re saying.” Will tried to laugh, but it came out weird and strained.
Mike sighed and ran a hand through his hair, frustratingly. “I can’t lose you again, okay?”
At that moment, there went Will’s entire plan went out the window, because how could Will die a hero when it would hurt Mike? How could he ever hurt Mike?
Will turned his entire body towards Mike, and Mike opened his eyes, a thin crystal of tears coating them.
Will didn’t even think about it; he placed his hand on Mike’s face, brushing his thumb over his cheek. He looked cold, all pale skin and starkly contrasting freckles, but his skin was warm.
“You’re not going to lose me.”
“You don’t know that.” Mike raised his own hand to cover Will’s.
At that moment, a million words were on the tip of Will’s tongue.
I love you. I always have. You won’t lose me because I will fight my way back to you.
But Will couldn’t say any of that, so he just stared at Mike, memorizing every little one of his features so he would have something to remember as he took his final breath.
Mike opened his mouth, as if he was going to say something, but then the door creaked open.
Will jumped back, quickly removing his hand from Mike’s face.
Mike frowned at him, and Will looked up at the doorway, away from Mike.
El stood there, looking at them with an understanding and apologetic look on her face.
Will hated how perceptive she was. She could always read Will with a single glance, just like Jonathan. Will wondered briefly if he was just that easy to read, or if El and Jonathan actually just had secret meetings where they discussed exactly how to tell every single emotion Will felt at any given moment. Either way, it was annoying.
“We have 20 minutes.” She said, What she really meant was, say your goodbyes now.
And with that, both Mike and Will got up.
Will hurried out of the room, smiling at El and careful to avoid looking at the boy he had loved. The boy he still loved.
Will was afraid that if he were to look at Mike, the vines would finally kill him.