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Language:
English
Series:
Part 2 of Parallel Lines
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Published:
2013-04-15
Words:
696
Chapters:
1/1
Kudos:
7
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188

Jealous

Summary:

Nikko's just jealous of Cal replacing him, that's all.

Work Text:

Nikko's jealous of Calvin, that's all. Cal's the one to get his father's approval, the one who gets to be there out in the field all the time, the one who Dad turns to when he wants something done. The one who's usurping Nikko's place as Solomon Zond's son. Who wouldn't be jealous in Nikko's place?

That's not what really annoys him, though. What really annoys him is that he can't lie to himself any more. He always told himself that it didn't matter that he never got to see his father, he was happy getting thrown out of school on a regular basis. He didn't need the old man in order to be himself, he was just Nikko and that was enough.

If he's jealous of Cal, then being Nikko Zond matters more than he wants to admit. He hates that. He hates it that his father matters to him at all, after all the time he's spent away. He hates it that he puts his father in more danger than he can ever make up for, and gives nothing back. He hates it that he wants to be useful more than he wants to be independent, and he hates it that he isn't useful. In fact the only remotely useful thing that he has done for his father is save Cal's life, and how stupid was that?

He sometimes wonders what would have happened if he hadn't been with his mother when she disappeared.

It's not like he wants to be Cal, he's not that desperate. Cal is the ubergeek after all, a man so obsessed with knowing it all that he got degrees in both archaeology and astronomy. Or something like that. Nikko doesn't really care, all he remembers is that Cal picked up the ultimate in arts geekery and science geekery, which makes Cal unquestionably a geek. Nikko has a healthy respect for knowledge — it's hard to blow up toilets if you haven't paid attention in Chem class — but he has standards too, and Calvin Banks goes so far into geekdom that even admitting to know him is a socially painful thing.

For example, Nikko finds it pretty funny watching Cal in a club. Cal is a drowning man who never realises that he can't swim. He attracts girls easily enough, what with his bad boy looks, his taut body and those soft brown eyes, but he doesn't keep them more than five minutes. He must just open his big mouth about some truly fascinating piece of Etruscan pottery and put his girl of the night straight to sleep. Nikko's usually too busy doing his own cruising to laugh out loud, but he always feels like it. It's the one thing about Cal that he knows he doesn't have to be jealous over, and it feels good.

So no, Nikko doesn't want to be like Cal. He's studying because his dad insists, and hell, Juliet's a good enough excuse for any teenager. He watches the History Channel because, crap as it is, it's always there when he can't sleep. He trains because he's always been good at gym class, and so that fitness is one less thing that his father can exclude him over.

And he saved Cal, insisted on dragging all of them down that crevasse, because it was what his father expected. True, Dad hadn't said anything positive about Cal's chances, but they'd kept on at him about teamwork all week, and Nikko could take a hint. If he wanted to.

It had nothing to do with the funny feeling he got in the pit of his stomach when he saw Cal lying there in the wreckage, all twisted and helpless. It wasn't the relief that he'd been expecting at having his rival out of the way, it wasn't even disappointment at not having beaten Cal himself, it was something much worse. Nikko didn't often admit to being afraid, particularly not for someone else, but at least this wasn't really being afraid as such. He was just scared that he'd never get the chance to prove that he was better than Cal, that's all.

After all, he's jealous of Calvin.

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