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[Click]
[RUSSIA]
I hope the third appearance of Kyrylo isn't too repetitive for you listeners, but he's a great companion, believe it or not.
[GRAND PRINCIPALITY OF KIEV]
It is only hard to believe because I am of Kyiv, and you, are of Moscow. We should hardly get along.
[RUSSIA]
Hm, but you're dead. I guess that's enough of an exception. Whatever issues I have is with Volyn, Halych, and your son.
[GRAND PRINCIPALITY OF KIEV]
Hm, you mean ignore it completely? This behaviour reminds me of the time when Mstislav Vladimirovich died and you left for Constantinople. And to even fight for her...
[RUSSIA]
You can just say it was for the sake of experience. She was happy I was there as, hm, Her Varangian. Plus, the idea of a unified Rus Land practically ceased to exist when he died. What was the use of having myself there? (Chuckle) You could honestly say the same for Holy Rome, I have no idea why he decided that he still had the power to even rule over his subjects. Oh, must've been terrifying, that form.
[GRAND PRINCIPALITY OF KIEV]
"That form"?
[RUSSIA]
Death's. It has something in tune with what I'm about to talk about today, actually. Which is, again, something about angels. Might be boring, but you'll be surprised by how much of a domain they hold over us Personifications.
[GRAND PRINCIPALITY OF KIEV]
Of which I am looking forward to. I find it quite bothersome that it is always I who does the talking, when it should really be you instead.
[RUSSIA]
Yes, yes. Be happy about it. I'll try to do less with the guests a bit after this. I actually want to drag in Lithuania here some time soon.
[GRAND PRINCIPALITY OF KIEV]
Which one?
[RUSSIA]
Not Skirtautas, obviously, I mean Vaivydas.
[GRAND PRINCIPALITY OF KIEV]
Well, he was the one I expected you to say. Hm, how do you manage to do that? The "making things appear out of nowhere", I mean. I have noticed you have done that several times already, maybe you should talk about that in this... thing of yours.
[RUSSIA]
You mean about The Tunnels? Well, that's an idea. I'd do that soon, maybe later. Who knows. It depends on whether or not I want to say how I do my things of course. I've been thinking more about those doppelgängers that are continents. Maybe after those.
[GRAND PRINCIPALITY OF KIEV]
Maybe.
[RUSSIA]
Enough with the distractions, Kyrylo, you always manage to make me talk about other things. (Huff) Well, angels, hm? Ugh, where do I even start. I know I can't even ask Kyrylo for help, because as open as his eyes may be, he can't see angels without melting. What? Don't look at me that way. You're not something that can take on an angel, Kyrylo. Even I can't. I don't even want to. When will they ever leave me alone?
[GRAND PRINCIPALITY OF KIEV]
There is something horribly wrong with you.
[RUSSIA]
There's always something wrong with me, Kyrylo. Anyway, where was I? Oh, yes, I don't like angels. They're so annoying. There are many types of angels according to Christian angelology, but people need to realise that it isn't really... that's controversial (Nervous laugh). Doesn't matter, the important one are the lower ranked ones. According to that sort of angelology.
Ugh, well, there are the angels, you know. I don't need to talk about them, they're not even important in the first place. Well... they are, but not to the grander scale of things. I already talked about The Principalities, well, Kyrylo did, so it's time for The Arches. Goodness, I want out. I want it out. I want it out of me.
Don't ask, I genuinely don't want to entertain you with the answer. As much as angelology would like to believe, there really is only four important ones to consider when it comes to this rank entirely. You said The Principalities' main role in accordance to Personifications was to ensure they stay alive? Well, The Arches are just there to terrorise us. I don't understand why they're even needed in the first place. Those little...
I'm getting sidetracked. Those silly angels keep making my life harder just because I wasn't specific with my words.
[GRAND PRINCIPALITY OF KIEV]
Is that why?
[RUSSIA]
(Sigh) Yes. Happened twice so far. I'm not keen about it happening again. (Grumble) Four. You can already expect what the first two are, and those are respectively mine and Lithuania's.
[GRAND PRINCIPALITY OF KIEV]
Is that why he acts so oddly when it comes to you?
[RUSSIA]
Oddly? It's normal enough, isn't it? He acts like he's about to go feral about me warring him about you and the other principalities. But whatever. The other two are a bit unexpected, but I'll just say that the third one shares a name with one of the higher types of angels, while the other one is actually just Death.
[GRAND PRINCIPALITY OF KIEV]
You talk about Death a lot.
[RUSSIA]
It's much more bearable than The Rhetoric, trust me. Maybe because it's not mine, but Germany's all fine and dandy. I actually quite like her a lot. Does she know? No, no, she does. She's just in denial. Like everyone is. Because I spread my deniability to everyone I can. Mm, honestly? I want to die, Kyrylo. Is that not a simple enough request?
[GRAND PRINCIPALITY OF KIEV]
You are dead.
[RUSSIA]
Eightfold. I hate this. I'm only this way because I tripped over with my words with an angel, you know. If I didn't do that, I would've just died in 1240, and that'd be it. No kin-slaughter needed. That in itself was also the same case. Honestly. I'm just so looking forward to the next time I do that. I'm not. I really don't like this. Why can't they just bother America? I mean, Vatican already has, but he's not The Arches...
[GRAND PRINCIPALITY OF KIEV]
... Is it alright to have you talk about other things when you are not supposed to?
[RUSSIA]
That's me. I talk about stuff unrelated to what I'm supposed to. They just need to deal with it. I've been losing my cool lately, and it's because of those stupid angels ruining everyone's lives. Surely they're the demons people are afraid about. I don't think there's even anything else for me to talk about. Look, Kyrylo, I don't know why they're there, but I know they're there to just terrorise us so far.
[GRAND PRINCIPALITY OF KIEV]
What did your Godless phase call The Principalities?
[RUSSIA]
Those Foremost, which is just a play of words over princeps, whether or not people realise. Doesn't matter, I should just stop talking about angels entirely. It's draining my already-minuscule soul. Deals? That's another thing. The only reason why I chose this as the topic is for the listeners to understand the emphasis on when I say angels exist, they exist. I don't need to say more than that.
[GRAND PRINCIPALITY OF KIEV]
If anyone else but I were to hear you talk about them, I think they would refer you to a physician, Yelena.
[RUSSIA]
I've been going to a therapist recently, actually. It helps, which, good enough, I guess. But I know that the things I'm seeing are real, so whatever people try to convince me of, they won't. They can't even see you, but I know you're here. You're talking to me, Kyrylo.
[GRAND PRINCIPALITY OF KIEV]
I am.
(Pause)
[RUSSIA]
I was lying. About why I'm not saying anything much.
[GRAND PRINCIPALITY OF KIEV]
It is in your voice... I noticed you did. There is a subtle shake within them to realise that you are being untruthful.
[RUSSIA]
Hm, yes, and people still say I'm hard to read. I'm an open book, really. They just need to spend time with me to pick those little things up.
[GRAND PRINCIPALITY OF KIEV]
Why, then, are you not telling what you wish to say?
[RUSSIA]
That defeats the purpose, doesn't it? (Pause) Maybe another time, Kyrylo.
[Click]