Chapter Text
“I don’t like girls.”
Mikes ears were ringing as he stood in the field outside the squawk. He didn’t know what will needed to tell them all but he definitely wasn’t expecting that. He has this overwhelming sense of heaviness in his heart for some reason and it’s making him feel sick and guilty and stupid. He is stupid, his best friend just shared a part of himself that was probably eating him up inside with fear. And for vecna to threaten to use that against him? Mike wonders if will hated himself. If he pushed people he cared about away just in case they found out. He shook his head. And who’s tammy? And what does it mean, and who was wills tammy? And why can’t he stop thinking about it? He glanced over at the others in the field. They were probably thinking about the impending doom they were about to face. The heavy metal guns in their bags. Fuck. Mike closed his eyes briefly, taking a deep breath. He imagined wills face, tears falling steadily down his rosy cheeks, catching on his long eyelashes. He could see his shaky hands, wringing together for some kind of comfort. And his eyes. Looking over at everyone in the room, how Mike felt when they briefly passed over him..how guilty he suddenly felt. He always feels guilty.
The feeling of a hand slipping into his made Mike startle out of his trance, he looked over at el who gave him a sweet smile, and Mikes frown softened as he tried to smile back. Him and el decided to became just friends after a few months back in Hawkins, el said she felt like she needed to be independent to discover who she was without Mike, and Mike agreed for his own reasons which he never shared with her…or himself.
“Mike.” Eleven almost whispered. “Have you talked to will yet?” Mikes heart jolted and he felt his heart rate rise along with the lump in his throat that hadn’t gone away since he walked in on Joyce and will. “What? Why would I…?” He felt an uncomfortable heat claw up his neck.
“Your his best friend? Surely you would want to talk to him?”
Fuck.
“Yes..yeah.” Mike let out a long exhale.
“Yeah, I should.”
He broke free from elevens hand and took a step forward. His legs felt numb and shaky and his heart rate was at an all time high. Shit. He couldn’t even tell whether he was walking or not until he reached the door. Why was he nervous? He had no reason to be? His hands were sweating though. And his head hurt, and he still felt sick. And just as he was about to reach for the handle, the door swung open and will stopped in front of Mike who, even though he was taller, felt so small in that moment.
“I feel sick.” Was all Mike could say.
“Are you ok? Do you need anything? Are you going to throw up?” Will suddenly looked less shocked and just worried, his eyes scanned over Mike for any signs that he wasn’t ok.
“Sorry. I’m fine..can we…I mean. Do you want to talk?” Mike stammered out. Wills expression didn’t change much, but it seemed more anxious maybe? Mike couldn’t tell.
“Sure.”
The roof of the squawk was actually a very lovely place to be, especially when the sun was going down. Mike stepped onto the roof with a shaky breath and sat down by the edge, not looking at him at will did the same. “So…you..” Mike started. He cleared his throat, ready to try again. “Mike. We don’t have to talk about it. I know it’s…a lot.”
Mike whipped his head around, looking at will for the first time properly.
“I understand if you feel weirded out.”
“What? No I don’t! I don’t.” The second I don’t was said more firmly, Mike needed will to know that he wasn’t weirded out. Which in truth..he was. But not at will.
“Ok.” Will smiled a little and looked out at the orange clouds infront of them.
And Mike wants to cry. He wants to cry and cry and cry and hug will so tight and never let him go and tell him he’s not weirded out and nothing could ever make him not be best friends with him and…and so much more.
“Will? Is it me?”
Wills face says it all. “Yes.”
“So it’s true? You’re over me?” Mikes heart was in his throat. And will just laughed, it sounded nervous and relieved at the same time.
“Of course it’s not. Are you kidding me?”
Mikes lip wobbles and he has to bite it to stop from crying for some reason.
“Do you really think I could get over you in a day?”