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Adam sighs, watching the phone ring one again. It’s been a constant for the past couple weeks with him calling his husband. He always hates when he doesn’t pick up, but tonight is Christmas eve and his husband is nowhere to be found.
He wants to give Takashi the benefit of the doubt, but he can’t find it within himself to care any longer. The multitude of arguments they’ve had on the subject only got worse and worse.
All he asks is *one* night.
One normal night.
One single night where they can at least be a family.
Is that so hard to ask for?
When the call finally goes to voicemail, he frustratedly slams the phone down. He brings his head down and sighs, the sound of disappointment sounding throughout the lit room.
The Christmas tree contains a beautiful spread of colorful lights, decorated with love and various ornaments. Presents scattered already underneath the tree, none from Santa yet, of course. The stocking hung by their fireplace with their names written upon in a glittery font.
Keith. Adam. *Takashi.*
When Takashi actually had a moment, they were able to set up the tree with Keith, giving him one of his first real experiences of decorating a tree in a long time.
It had been the happiest day of Keith’s life besides from when they adopted him officially. Claiming Keith as their own, making them a complete family together.
Keith’s eyes lit up with the kind of joy that made him giddy. He felt like he belonged somewhere, right with Adam and Shiro.
As a family.
Though, these days? They seem less and less like a family everyday.
Shiro had been at work for the last few days, supposedly finishing a big project. It’s been so incredibly hard to get a hold of him. Keith was constantly asking if he’d be home for Christmas Eve or even Christmas.
He’d come up to Adam, playing with his fingers nervously as he approached him each time.
”Adam..?” Keith would murmur, softly and with the nerves of a kid having to give a speech.
He’d look up from doing his crossword, sitting on the couch, glasses perched high on his nose.
“Yes, Keith?” He would smile, putting the pencil into the book before setting it down. Adam always had time for Keith, no matter what.
“I… Uhm—“ The child’s eyes looking everywhere but at Adam, “I was wondering if… if Shiro was coming home for Christmas Eve?”
Adam looks at him with nothing but a fond look, “How about we call and ask? I’m sure he will answer.”
Keith’s eyes lit up, the thought of getting to talk to Shiro again made him happy. He was his favorite, considering he was the one who took Keith in. Adam having a hard time adjusting to it, but caring and loving Keith as his own nonetheless.
“Come here, sit.” He hums, patting the seat next to him.
Excitedly Keith uses his little legs and runs up next to him and jumps up onto the couch to sit down. He bounces slightly, unable to contain his excitement.
Adam laughs gently as he wraps his arm around Keith’s shoulder and pulls him in, leaning down and kissing the top of his head.
He pulls his phone out and Keith watches as he unlocks it and dials in his phone number.
The name ‘Takashi’ appears on the caller ID, turning it on speaker mode as the phone begins to ring… ring… ring…
Keith whispers, “Is he gonna pick up?”
Ring… ring… ring…
He only sighs, “Hopefully,” a sullen smile gracing his face.
Ring… ri—
“Hello?” A voice sounds throughout the room.
“Kash—“
A child’s gasp sounds out, “Shiro!” He snatches the phone from Adam, giving him a shock.
“Keith!” Adam laughs, “You have to ask nicely! We don’t take without asking, right?”
“…right.” He whispers softly, embarrassed he just did that in front of Adam, and with Shiro hearing it over the phone.
“Sorry honey, Keith is just excited to talk to you.” He sighs, letting him now hold the phone.
Shiro’s laugh echoes from the phone, “Listen to Adam, buddy. Make sure to ask next time, okay?”
“Okay..” Keith huffs, his brows furrowing, his disdain for being told off clear.
Adam smiles and just gently strokes Keith’s head, “So, Keith has a question for you…” He hums, “Go ahead, ask.”
He’s afraid of what his answer is going to be. Adam knows how he typically is with his work and how he treats it. It’s almost as if Shiro is married to his work rather than he’s married to him.
“Shoot, buddy. I’m all ears.”
“Uhm.. are you gonna be home for…” He turns his head to look at Adam, and he can only just smile and nod, an encouragement for him to ask.
“Are you gonna be home for Christmas eve?” Keith asks meekly, burying his head into Adam’s side.
The call is silent for a bit, nothing coming through so Adam has to ask.
“Takashi? Are you there?” He asks, rubbing Keith’s shoulder soothingly.
“Oh- Yes, yeah. Sorry, I’m just really busy.” He mumbles, clearly more focused on his work rather than focused on the two of them on the call.
Adam can only sigh, “Right, of course you are.” His tone is condescending but all knowing.
Sighing, he replies, “Uh, well… I dunno, bud. I’m really busy here. I’m going to try, okay?” Movements of sound can be heard on his side, slight chatter but nothing overwhelming.
“Okay… I just really want you here..” Keith murmurs, embarrassed that he just really wants Shiro to be home.
“I know, buddy. I’m going to do my best, don’t worry. I’ll bring you back something, okay?”
“Okay…”
Adam squeezes Keith, knowing how this conversation might feel for him. That feeling of not knowing whether or not someone you love is gonna come home. Keith struggled with it immensely at first, but it’s obvious he felt safe enough to know both Adam and Shiro will come home safe to him.
“Hey, why don’t you go get ready for bed?” Adam hums, letting go of Keith so he can get up, “It’s late. Go on, go brush your teeth and I’ll come to tuck you in.”
Keith whines, clearly annoyed he’s being sent to bed, “I don’t wanna… ‘m not tired.”
“You said that last night when I let you watch that movie. You told me you weren’t tired and then I found you sleeping not even 30 minutes later!” He laughs, scooting Keith up and off the couch, taking the phone back from him, “Now go.”
“Ugh, fine.” He groans, standing up off the couch with this grouchy look on his face.
“Say goodnight to Takashi.” Adam tuts.
A laugh sounds from the phone, “Goodnight Keith, love you kiddo. Sleep well.”
Keith only huffs, “Psh.. Goodnight, Shiro…” He mumbles, “Love you too..” Embarrassed he just said that, he runs off to go do as he was told.
Adam can only smile as he watches Keith run off towards his bathroom to go brush his teeth, watching fondly before Shiro’s voice emits out.
“What a handful, hm?” He asks, his voice playful.
He can only sigh, disconcerting as the silence settles between the two.
“Yeah, he is. Would be better if you were actually here, you know?” Adam can’t help it. He’s salty about the fact Shiro isn’t home with them. He should be, anyway, but he’s not. Seemingly Shiro only has eyes for his work rather than him.
“Adam—”
“No. Don’t even,” Adam hushes him, cutting him off, “I know already, you need to work in order to provide for us. I’ve heard the same damn story over and over, Takashi. Frankly, I am sick of it.”
He says his name with such disdain that you can practically feel it emanating from him. His anger, his frustration.
“You were the one who took him in, so why can’t you be the one who’s here for him? You know I care about him and care for him as much as you do, but I feel like I’m always doing the brunt work of it.”
He sighs, frustrated that this is what their relationship has reached.
“I know…” Shiro sighs from the other side, “You know I want to be there with you and him.”
“So, why don’t you act like it? You’re practically married to your work. Was I not the one you married?”
Adam feels himself losing it by the second, he knows he shouldn’t be this upset about it, but it feels like such a valid issue to be upset about. The tears begin to prick his eyes, beginning to slide down his cheek.
“Adam— Please, this isn’t fair to me.”
“Right, and it’s supposed to be fair to me. Of course.” He scoffs.
“I’m trying, okay? Isn’t that enough?”
“No.” He whispers, “It’s not.”
The silence grows between them, it’s deafening and yet so loud at the same time.
It’s loud.
So loud.
“I… I really don’t know what you want me to say anymore.” Shiro says, his voice laced with uncertainty.
“Just—don’t bother. I’m going to put Keith to bed. Goodnight, Takashi.”
“Okay… Goodnight, Adam. I love you?” It comes out as a question, not a statement, not even a declaration of it. Shiro can only hope Adam says it back.
Adam sighs, rubbing his temple, “Love you too, goodnight.”
His response is more clipped and short, ending the call right then and there. He puts his phone away and can only contemplate his life.
Eventually, he gets himself up to go tuck Keith into bed. He walks into his room to find Keith in bed, stuffed hippo at his side with his nightlight still lit. When they found out that Keith was afraid of the dark, they had gotten him a hippo themed nightlight since it was the one he most gravitated towards. They were more than happy to purchase it for Keith when setting up his room to live in.
Keith looks over towards Adam as he approaches, “Did.. you and Shiro have a fight?” He murmurs quietly, squeezing his stuffed animal slightly.
“I heard you say some stuff…”
He only stares, caught off guard by the question before sighing, scooting Keith over in bed to lay with him, “We didn’t fight, Keith. Don’t worry.” Adam hums, gently petting Keith’s head to soothe him.
“But—”
Adam cuts him off, not wanting him to worry about something he shouldn’t have to, “Shh, it’s grown-up stuff. Nothing you need to worry about, okay? You just focus on being a kid.”
“Okay…” He grumbles out, snuggling in closer with Adam, “Can you read me a story then?”
“Sure, Keith. I’ll read you a story.” He chuckles and grabs a book from off his shelf, opening it to begin.
——————
This was last week, and now it’s the night before Christmas. Christmas Eve. Shiro was supposed to be home, or at least he said he'd try. Of course, Adam had full expectations of this happening. He knows his husband and knows how much his work means to him. Especially being some very important over there, it was bound to happen whether he liked it or not.
Adam calls once again, letting the phone ring. He proceedingly gets more and more frustrated as it continues to ring. It’s as if the phone is only taunting him, emitting the most annoying sound as it stops.
He finds hope that Shiro actually picked up, only for it to immediately go to voicemail.
“We’re sorry, but the person you are trying to reach is unavailable right now. Please leave a message after the beep—”
Groaning, he ends the call once more. He shoots Shiro a quick text to let him know to call him back. That it’s important.
When is anything important to Shiro anymore? Not even his own husband, nor the kid he’s taking care of seem to matter at this moment. He finds himself unsure of what he’s supposed to do at this point.
He gets up, wandering around the house, unable to find something to do for himself.
It’s late. Keith is in bed and Shiro still isn’t home.
He supposes he should finalize everything for the morning, since it seems Shiro isn’t coming. Keith, of course, the cute child he is; still believes in Santa. Which isn’t inherently a bad thing, but it does make the Christmas season a whole lot more fun for it. It gives him something to look forward to.
Shiro missed out on all the essential parts of the season: making cookies to give to Santa, gingerbread house decorating, building a snowman, the whole lot of it. The things that make the holiday season essential to Keith.
Adam can only imagine how it will be like when Keith finds out Santa isn’t actually real, but they’ll let him believe as long as he knows.
Before sending Keith off to bed, they both stood at the kitchen table. A plate of cookies being carefully curated by Keith to give to Santa, even including the very much needed milk and some carrots for the reindeer.
Keith insists they’ll be hungry, doing all that traveling in order to help Santa deliver all of those presents. He very much demanded they do it, and so Adam had to go digging into the fridge to find some carrots and put them on a separate plate.
Adam could only laugh at his demands since he seemed so serious about it, of course, he would give in. That adorable child is nothing but spoiled.
He pulls out the multitude of stocking stuffers he had accumulated, placing them delicately in each stocking and filling them to the brim. There was some candy for Keith, not too much since he typically isn’t one for sweets in the first place. A couple mini toys he could play with, and other various items.
Filling up both his and Shiro’s with relatively similar stuff, caught in the rhythm of stuffing them, he hears his phone ring from the distance where it sits on the couch.
Adam could only hope to god that it was Shiro, otherwise he would be in serious trouble. And when Adam is upset at Shiro? He’s upset. The whole ignoring bit, the petty and aggressive things he’d do in Shiro’s presence.
He gets up and walks over towards his phone only to find that it is Takashi calling him. A string of texts popping up on the top screen, he ignores them and picks up his call that he’s been expecting.
“Hello..?” He asks tentatively, “Takashi?”
“Adam—”
Immediately his voice cuts out, he’s not sure why, but this already sounds like one static phone call.
“Takashi? Are you there?”
“Yes. Yeah. I’m he—I’m now just ——”
“What? I can’t understand you, you’re cutting out.”
“I have to—I’ll—see———, love you.”
“Takashi, I can’t hear you!” He whispers, raising his voice slightly in a panic knowing he can’t wake Keith up.
Abruptly, the call ends and that’s the end of that.
Adam can only stare at the phone in disbelief, unable to decipher the fact that his husband had just said a bunch of words and he couldn’t hear a single one.
Goddamnit. He thinks, putting the phone down.
Suddenly, he’s right back where he started. The house is quiet, the sounds of the fire snap, crackle, and pop gently as the flames begin to die out slowly.
He didn’t even bother to go read the text messages Shiro sent him, so he quickly picks back up his phone and opens them. They don’t even make sense, Adam thinks thoughtlessly as he looks at the few messages that were sent.
It seems as if they are missing important context clues, assuming they didn’t send through, which truly can’t be Shiro’s fault. So he won’t blame him for it.
Though, he seriously can’t understand what he was trying to get at.
“Perhaps…” Adam thinks, ”Maybe he is coming home…?”
He could choose to stay up, wait, see if he does hold up his promise of him trying. Or, he can keep the door locked, go to bed, and wake up to open presents without Shiro. If he has to do this without him, he will.
Adam decides to sit back down on the couch, sighing as he contemplates what he should do. He could give him the benefit of the doubt, allowing his window of time to be extended.
Figuring he should just give him some leniency, being his husband and all, he lays down across the couch, putting a pillow underneath his head and a blanket over himself. He’ll sleep for an hour, Adam tells himself, knowing full well he probably won’t sleep for the hour.
He lays for what feels like hours, but it’s only been a good ten minutes, judging by the ticking of the clock on the wall; which is very loud in a house that’s quiet. Turning onto his back, he looks up at the ceiling, the blankness of it putting him in a trance.
Maybe, he’ll count sheep.
That should do the trick.
Closing his eyes once more, he begins to count.
One sheep…
Two sheep…
Four sheep…
Ten sheep…
Fifteen sheep…
Twenty sheep…
Yeah, he can’t do it.
He lets himself wallow in the sorrow of it all, turning onto his side and finding a comfortable position within it. It feels much better than laying on his back, his face pressed against the pillow and it’s so warm against his skin.
Adam sighs as he finally feels himself drift off to sleep, his phone sitting beside him as the sound of more texts come through, but unable to hear due to falling asleep.
Soundly sleeping, he doesn’t hear the click of the door lock being unlocked as a breeze of cold air settles into the dim and quiet house. The door is shut quietly behind whoever it is, having a feeling those who are in there are sleeping. Safe and sound.
The sound of something jingles gently through the room, the sounds of someone shrugging off their jacket and putting things down as they round the corner. A sigh of relief as the person peers into the main room with the tree, noticing the stockings are stuffed and all presents from Santa have already been delivered.
They look around to see if anyone is up, and seemingly no one is. Finally, entering the main room as quietly as he can, he finds someone on the couch, and it is none other than his husband, Adam, who lays comfortably and a slight snore coming from inside. Shiro can only smile solemnly as he knows the pain he’d caused Adam to feel, watching his husband lay there, knowing he had two choices with himself and went with the most viable and trusting option.
With Shiro being gone so long, it tends to affect their relationship. It’s something they’ve been working on, but it doesn’t last forever. He walks over as quietly as he can, kneeling down to brush back the tiny hairs littering Adam’s face.
He sighs as he stares at his husband's peaceful face, placing a kiss on Adam’s forehead.
“I’m home…” Shiro whispers gently, not exactly expecting him to wake up to greet him.
Adam begins to stir awake, his brows furrowing as he feels someone's presence standing over him.
“Mmmnh—” he mumbles out, clearly tired. His eyelids twitch as they slowly open up, blearily peering up at the person above him, “Kashi..?”
He chuckles lightly, “Yeah Adam, it’s me,” smiling down at him, he kisses his lips gently, "I'm home, just like I said I would be.”
“Mm.. Always know how to make an entrance.” Adam murmurs, kissing him back just as gently, “I was worried sick.” He sighs, trying to wake himself up so he can properly talk to Shiro.
“I know, I’m sorry. I’m here now.” He whispers, “Keith asleep?”
“Mmhm, he… wanted to stay up for you, but I told him Santa was coming so he had to sleep.”
“Sounds like our Keith…” Shiro hums, as he watches Adam sit up.
Lifting his arms up, Adam pulls Shiro in for a hug. He wants to feel his touch, his warmth; Although, Shiro is kind of cold from having been just outside, and also smells strange.
“You needa take a shower.” He huffs, sniffing Shiro but continuing to hug him, “You stink.”
Shiro laughs quietly, “Yes, sir.” He replies sarcastically, kissing Adam once more.
“I set up everything else for the morning.” He grumbles, kissing him once more, “I just need to make it seem like Santa came. Me and Keith made cookies and he overfrosted them… You know I don’t do sugar, so..”
“Yeah, I can do it.” Shiro says, pulling himself up and off his grip from where Adam was laying.
“Oh, and there’s carrots, and a glass of milk.”
“Okay, I get it, I get it.” He hums, “Why don’t you go to bed now, you’ve done all the work. You deserve the sleep.”
Shiro pulls Adam up off the couch, “Come on, I’ll put you to bed.” He simply picks him up, considering his strength allows him to right now.
Adam is always in shock whenever Shiro can just pick him up, he forgets he can do that sometimes. He doesn’t complain though, he loves it.
He walks them over quietly to their shared room, the fact that it’s their room astounds him every time. Pulling the covers down he lays Adam down in bed, his knee beside him dipping into the bed as he kisses him once more. Shiro missed the touch of Adam’s lips, as did Adam miss Shiro’s.
“Sleep now, I’ll join you in a bit.” He hums as Adam surges up to kiss him back.
“Don’t take too long, okay?”
“I won’t. You know I always keep my promises.”
Adam sighs, “I know you do.”
“Okay, go to sleep.” Shiro smiles, tucking him into the bed, dimming the light and heading into the kitchen.
When Shiro looks at the cookies, they are overfrosted, as Adam said. He wasn’t kidding, was he? Oh, Keith, Shiro thinks fondly.
Eventually, finishing up in the kitchen, he goes and takes a quick shower to rinse himself off, get clean. Changing into his pajamas, he finally makes it into their shared room, Adam fast asleep right where he left him.
Shiro turns off the lights completely, getting into bed and pulling the covers over him. He snuggles into Adam’s back, having been desperate to be able to cuddle Adam for his duration of being gone, it truly filled him with sorrow.
He lays against his back, thinking.
He finds himself smiling at the thought of him being around always and them being a family. It completes him. It completes them. Maybe they should get a dog… Although, that’s a discussion for another time, of course.
Either way, he got to give Keith a family, and complete his and Adam’s. It fills him with this sense of joy he will never forget for many years to come.
Seriously, what’s better than a gift such as that?