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The crunch of dirt being pierced filled the quiet night. As the shovel filled with soil, carelessly tossed to the side before filling with more, small grunts echoed in the emptiness. Light rain drizzled from the sky. Dirt slowly but surely piled up to Abaddon’s side. He let out a huff as he deepened the hole in front of him.
He cursed his vessel’s small stature as he struggled to reach further into the hole. Abaddon jumped down once his arms were too short to reach the dirt. The skin on his hands were getting roughed up, blisters forming from how tightly he gripped the shovel in his hands. He tossed more dirt onto the pile.
A bird somewhere above screeched, a loud sound in the silence. His head barely reached over the top of the hole and his arms struggled to reach the dirt pile. Some dirt tumbled off the pile, landing at his feet. He let out a short string of curses. In the distance, he heard the once screeching bird explode.
Abaddon started a new pile on the opposite side, still a tad too short to reach it properly. Memories poked at the forefront of his mind as he dug.
Esther ran into the parlor with a big grin on her face as she plopped down next to Abaddon, disturbing the bones he was playing with. She brandished a book and placed it on the floor, immediately flicking to a page she had bookmarked. He squinted at the page. The words stared back at him, squiggles that meant something but nothing at the same time.
“For what purpose have you brought this to me?” he asked, turning his attention to Esther.
“I want you to teach me!” she said. “I’ve tried attempting it on my own, but I just can’t get it right. So I was hoping you’d be able to give me insight as to why. You know, give me a demon’s perspective.”
Abaddon stared blankly.
“So?” Esther asked after a moment.
“Esther,” he began as he turned back to his bones, “I cannot help you if I do not know what you are doing.”
“Right, forgot you can’t read…” She shook her head. “It’s a spell that gives the person the feeling to sneeze but no sneeze comes out. It says it lasts a few hours and I’m going to use it on Ben.”
“Oh, how devious. Then yes, I shall assist you.”
Esther smiled again, flashing her teeth as the two set to work on the spell. Esther read the instructions to him, and he showed her how to properly prepare the runes. Eventually, they had a circle set up in the middle of the parlor, bones placed in the perfect spots with sigils and symbols. There were candles positioned along the outside. Abaddon gave her the proper pronunciation of the spell and Esther got to chanting.
Magic swirled around the circle, twisting around Esther’s legs and filling the air with the smell of sulfur and ozone. The candles sparked and flickered before blowing out. The smoke billowed with the power of the spell before it all fizzled out with a flash of light. Esther stared at Abaddon, an expectant look on her face.
“What?” he asked.
“What do you mean, ‘what?’” Esther asked, throwing her hands in the air. “It didn’t work! What did we do wrong?”
“We did nothing wrong. It should take effect within the hour,” Abaddon explained simply.
“And you’re sure?”
“How dare you doubt Abaddon? Prince of the underworld, cursed descendant of-”
“Yeah, yeah, I get it.” Esther waved him off. “I’ll wait an hour and we’ll check in on Ben later.”
Abaddon nodded before picking up his bones from earlier.
“We should probably clean this up before Mom notices,” Esther lamented. She stared at him expectantly.
He groaned but set his bones back down. “Fiiine,” he said, annoyed.
It took about fifteen minutes for the two to clear the evidence of their ritual. Abaddon didn’t help much, he kept getting drawn toward his bones. Esther had to keep bringing him back to the task at hand. Cleaning the symbols off the carpet was the hardest part, but they managed.
Eventually, they had the parlor looking nearly the same as before the spell, but the scent of sulfur and ozone lingered. Abaddon perched himself on the edge of the couch with bones in hand. Esther sat on the other side of the couch, flipping through her book. It was a comfortable silence between the two of them.
When Kathrine walked passed, a laundry basket on her hip, she seemed a little suspicious of the smell but didn’t push. She ruffled Esther’s hair, who swatted her hand away, and gave Abaddon a simple nod, who returned the nod with one of his own.
Twenty minutes of silence went by, broken only by the sound of bones clinking together and pages turning.
“Hey Esther?” Ben called as he walked in. “Have you seen my harmonica anywhere?”
“No,” Esther said quickly.
“Huh, then I don’t know where it is.”
Abaddon sniffed but didn’t look up, “I do not understand why you insist on playing that confounded instrument, especially when you are not very good at it.”
“I have to practice to be good at it!” Ben defended.
“Mm,” Abaddon hummed dismissively.
“So, Ben, how you feelin’?” Esther asked, looking up from her book with a grin.
“Fine? Why do you…ah-” Ben’s hand flew to his nose. “Nyeh- ah- hah-”
“What is this?” Abaddon asked. “What are these noises?”
“Sorry, I ah- feel like I’m gonna…gonna ah-”
“I… do not understand,” Abaddon said.
“I think,” Esther began, “that Ben is going to sneeze.” She grinned as she spoke, blinking with one eye at Abaddon.
“What did you just do with your face?”
“Esther,” Ben said, a warning in his tone. “Why did you just wink at Abaddon?”
Dirt fell onto Abaddon’s head, a growl escaping his throat. He shook his head. Soil tumbled out of his hair and onto his feet. He shoveled it out of the hole again. Abaddon looked up, blinking against the rain which had begun to fall harder. Mud squelched under his shoes. His shovel scooped more dirt out of the hole.
Abaddon wiped his hand across his forehead. Moisture transferred to the back of his hand, whether from sweat or rain he wasn’t sure. He didn’t really care either. He just had to keep digging. Stabbing his shovel back into the mud, he flung it over his head. Abaddon was too deep in the hole to reach his piles of dirt properly, he just had to hope that whatever dirt he threw out stayed out.
Pain spread through his hands and he leaned his shovel against the dirt wall. He stared at his palms. A few blisters had been rubbed raw and popped. Abaddon let out a quiet hiss of pain before picking the shovel back up. He could focus on the blisters later. Right now, he just had to keep digging. He just had to make a deep enough hole.
Abaddon sat perched on the edge of Ben’s desk, staring at the teen as he read a book. He tapped his fingers along his knees, waiting. He wasn’t sure what he was waiting for, he just knew he was waiting for something to happen.
“Can I, uh… help you, Abaddon?” Ben asked, finally looking up from his book with a concerned look on his face.
Abaddon shrugged, never taking his eyes off of Ben.
“Did you just want to hang out with me?”
‘Hang out’? Is that what he wanted? He wasn’t sure what brought him to Ben’s room in the first place. He remembered prowling through the vents before he stopped at the one just above Ben’s bed. Ben wasn’t in the room at the time. He remembered falling out and bouncing to the floor. He ended up climbing onto Ben’s desk and sat there, waiting. He felt like a gargoyle atop the tallest tower.
When Ben did return, he didn’t seem surprised by Abaddon’s presence. He had just blinked at the demon before settling himself onto his bed and opening his book. The two had been in an unusually comfortable silence while Abaddon stared. Minutes had passed as Ben essentially ignored Abaddon, Abaddon watching Ben’s chest rise and fall with each breath.
Abaddon shrugged again, blinking and letting his eyes wander around the room.
“Well, I won’t kick you out, mostly because I don’t think I can,” Ben said. “But you’re free to stay as long as you’d like. I’m willing to play a game with you or something if you want.”
Abaddon shook his head, he wasn’t in the mood for games. He had already beaten Esther at Connect Four and, for some reason, he didn’t feel the need to triumph against Ben as well.
“Would you want to read with me? I can start the book over, if you want me to, or I can start from where I’m at. You could pick a book if you’d prefer that.”
“That sounds exceptionally boring and a waste of my time,” Abaddon said. When Ben deflated at that, he felt the strangest feeling to backtrack. It was an odd sensation in his stomach. He blinked.
“Though, I suppose I don’t have anything better to do. Your book will suffice.”
Ben smiled and scooted over, patting the spot next to him for Abaddon. He hopped off the desk and padded over. Abaddon climbed up onto the bed and got comfy against the wall. Ben curled his legs under himself, fluffing up a pillow behind him.
Ben started reading from where he left off. Abaddon didn’t really understand what was happening in the story, but he still sat there and listened. He leaned his head back and closed his eyes. It was calming, just sitting and listening to Ben’s voice. The story went through ups and downs. The characters were getting into fights with each other, which Abaddon liked, before making up and being friends again.
Eventually, Esther came into the room. She originally came to fetch Abaddon for an adventure, but she ended up sitting on Ben’s bed and listening to the story as well. Ben kept their attention with how he read, his voice changing for each character. They each sounded unique and felt like they were real. Abaddon liked the different voices.
Climbing out of the hole, Abaddon threw his shovel on the ground. He rubbed the blisters on his hands as he trudged through the rain. His hands hurt from digging. Abaddon picked up a rather large rock and dragged it back to the hole. He shoved it along one edge of the hole and he sat next to it. Pulling a crayon out of his pocket, he began scribbling on the rock. He knew how to spell his name, thanks to Nathan, and he was going to mark this rock.
Kathrine placed a bowl in front of him. He squinted at the loops inside as she poured milk over them. She handed him a spoon. Abaddon picked up one of the loops and sniffed it.
“Just eat it,” Kathrine said, sitting across from him.
“Where are the others?” Abaddon asked, setting the loop back into the bowl.
“Esther is at a sleepover and Ben has piano lessons.”
Abaddon hummed before taking a bite, being met with the taste of fruit and sugar. His eyes widened slightly as he realized what he was eating.
“This is an acceptable offering. For what purpose have you gifted this to me?”
Kathrine took a sip of her coffee, “I figured I would reward you for your good behaviour. You haven’t bitten anyone in almost 2 weeks, and you’ve been keeping Esther and Ben out of trouble. So you get Froot Loops.”
“I have not kept your offspring from trouble. They have simply kept their discord away from prying eyes,” Abaddon explained between bites.
“You know, most people would have just lied and accepted the gift.”
“When have you known me to lie?”
“That’s fair,” she said, chuckling.
Abaddon enjoyed his bowl of Froot Loops while Kathrine finished her coffee. When they were both done, Kathrine took their dishes and placed them in the sink to be washed later.
“So, Abaddon, I was thinking you could help me with a couple things while the others are gone.”
“I suppose I could attempt assistance. Though I would rather spend my time prowling the vents. Consider this a great honor.”
“We might both get what we want. Turns out there’s a mouse problem here and I think they are getting in through the vents. I was thinking you could get in there, you know see where they are coming from and stop them from causing more problems.”
“You are giving me full permission to hunt whatever enters my domain?”
“If you see a mouse in the vents, go nuts,” Katherine said. “I want them gone.”
Abaddon felt giddy as he leapt off the bench and made his way to the vent. He pried the cover off and stuck a leg in.
“Oh, and Abaddon?” He looked up at Kathrine as she spoke. “Keep up the good behavior, and there will be more Froot Loops.”
“Oh, there will be more Froot Loops, regardless of my behavior,” Abaddon said as he slipped into the vents, putting the cover back on behind himself.
Abaddon admired his work. His name stared back at him in bold letters, though the harsh rain seemed to have muddied some of them. He adjusted how the rock was sitting, trying to match the rocks around him. It wouldn’t sit perfectly, but it was good enough. He stared down into the hole beneath him. One last step and everything would align.
His thumb rubbed against his blisters absentmindedly. He was glad he didn’t have to dig anymore. All he had to do was lay down and everything would be fine.
“Abaddon?” Nathan’s voice was heard behind him. “Whatcha doing, bud?”
Abaddon refused to look up. If Nathan knew what he was doing, he was sure to stop him. He didn’t want that. He wanted to finish his project.
“Abaddon,” Nathan continued to pry, “why did you dig a hole between…?”
“Leave me be.”
“Abaddon, I don’t know what’s going on in that head of yours, but I think we should head back to the hotel. Maybe enjoy a cup of hot chocolate?”
“I said, leave me be.”
A sigh left Nathan before his legs appeared in Abaddon’s peripheral. He crouched down to Abaddon’s height and placed a hand on his head.
“Look, buddy, I miss them too. But throwing yourself into a grave isn’t going to bring them back. And I doubt they’d want you stuck like this. So come on. Let’s go home.”
“Why should I? It won’t bring them back, you said it yourself. Why return to normalcy now that my whole world has been ripped asunder once again? The least I can do to honor them is to join them in the ground. If that is where they must rest for eternity, then so shall I!”
Abaddon could feel tears well up in his eyes and he hated it. He wanted to curse Ben and Esther’s souls for daring to make him feel like this. But he couldn’t. Not anymore. Not with them gone. It stabbed into his chest with a pain he didn’t know he was capable of feeling. Especially not over human blips.
“Abaddon, if you bury yourself now, I have the feeling I’m never going to see you again. And I don’t want that. I don’t want to lose you too. You’re the only family I’ve got left, so please. Come back to the hotel with me,” Nathan stood and held out his hand. Even if Abaddon wanted to take it, he knew he couldn’t. It had been years since he was able to hold Nathan’s hand and that sparked more pain in his chest.
His tears began to fall as he sat staring into his own grave. He took in a shaky breath as he shook his head, pulling his knees up to his chest. Abaddon buried his face into his knees. He didn’t want anyone to see him like this. Like he was a human capable of feeling human emotions. He was a demon and he was just having a moment of weakness. A disgusting, insignificant, disturbing moment of weakness.
“Leave me to rot, Nathan. It is what I deserve.”
“Oh, Abaddon, you don’t deserve that. I’m not leaving you. I’ll sit here as long as you need me to. If you ever feel like getting out of that grave, I’ll be here for you.”
Abaddon let out a warbled sound, mentally kicking himself for letting such a pitiful sound escape him. Nathan sat at the edge of the grave, just within arms reach. Abaddon curled in on himself tighter. He wanted to disappear. To stop feeling such grief and pain. He wanted Ben and Esther back. He wanted Kathrine back. He wanted them to talk to him again, cast spells with him, play games, read books, something. Anything. Anything.
All he had left was Nathan. And he had left him before. Stuck as a ghost now, all he could do was talk with him. He couldn’t hold his hand. Tousle his hair. Hold him like he used to. Abaddon supposed that it was better than nothing. Better than not seeing Nathan ever again. Ever hearing his voice again.
He wanted to scream. To punch something. Break something. Anything. Bring back a sense of normalcy in his shattered world. A sense of order to this chaos of grief. It was like he was stuck in a storm that would never end. Stuck with thorns wrapped around his heart.
Abaddon sniffled before lowering himself back down into the grave. He laid down on his side, curling his legs up. He let his eyes close. A tear escaped, falling down into his hair. He didn’t care. If his family rested in the ground, so would he. If his family was doomed to be below the earth, so would he.
“Let it out, bud,” he heard Nathan say quietly.
He didn’t want to, but he was going to. He’d let it out until there was nothing left of him. Nothing of him like there was nothing of them.