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He couldn't take it anymore.
Without saying anything to anyone, Nick finished his drink and left the ZPD Christmas party. He stepped out onto the second-floor balcony, greedily inhaling the cool air and leaning on the railing.
The restaurant was decorated with hundreds of small lights, making it glow warmly through the heavy rain. The air in the Rainforest District was pleasantly fresh due to the humidity and constant wetness. It managed to distract him from his never ending spinning thoughts.
But the distraction didn't last long. It never did.
For several weeks now, Nick hadn't had a moment's peace. When he wasn't trying to convince himself that everything was okay the way it was, he failed to distract himself from those bright, lavender-colored eyes. Because everything was not okay. How could it be?
How he wished he could sit inside the restaurant with the others, laughing at the bar and making fun of the other police officers' dancing styles. Or getting upset about the mediocre food. Or even just pretending to listen to Clawhauser as he talked about his favorite donuts. But how could he, if Judy was standing there looking like the sun and the stars and the moon and everything else that was just... beautiful.
For weeks he had been struggling with himself. In the consuming effort not to make a mistake, not to walk over to her and destroy their friendship.
Because his mind and heart were at war. His mind told him not to ruin anything, his heart sang of opportunities and what-ifs. His mind carefully weighed up next steps, his heart blindly rushed in one direction and ignored warnings. His mind made resolutions, his heart broke them.
And day in, day out, it was all about her.
When he wanted nothing more than to close his eyes and dive deep, Judy managed to make him fly and give him back his perspective. Because the more he wanted to distance himself from her - and he tried -, the stronger she pulled him toward her. Maybe it was because her smile numbed his senses, or because he lost himself in her eyes again and again and couldn't find his way out. Or didn't want to.
Maybe it was because she saw him. Really saw him.
Maybe, even if he couldn't admit it to himself, she had that power over him. Judy didn't know she had it, but she wielded it skillfully nonetheless.
“Nick, is everything okay?”
Because Nick's mind and heart were at war, and Judy was both the cause and the answer.
A knowing, faint smile spread across his face as he continued to gaze at the dense rainforest in front of him and the gondolas slowly passing by.
“Nick?” Judy asked again, uncertain. She took a few steps toward him .
His mind won this round. Again.
“Hey, Carrots! Of course. Just couldn't stand Chief Beef's dancing any longer!” He put on his typical grin. Judy laughed and walked straight to Nick, standing next to him at the railing. They were silent for a few seconds.
“You know I'm always here for you, Nick? I meant every word I said in Tundratown. I... I just wanted to reassure you of that.”
And the battle entered the second round.
Nick noticed how his thoughts were screaming at him again and how his grin disappeared. Don't make a mistake now! Everything is fine between you two! You trust each other, you've told each other how important you are to each other. What more do you want?
Judy watched him as his face experienced a hundred different emotions at once, as he resisted, as he fought. How much she wanted to help him. A few weeks after their success with the reptiles, she noticed it. She noticed how distracted Nick had become. How much he was struggling with something.
“No matter what it is, no matter when or if you tell me, I'll stay with you,” she smiled gently at him, gathered all her courage, reached out, and kissed him on the cheek. "Merry Christmas, Nick."
And all hell broke loose.
It was overwhelming how she crumbled his facades without a hint of effort. She shifted stone by stone with an ease that made his sturdy walls tremble. His mind warned him. He should fearfully try to maintain his protective wall against her. He absolutely needed to! But after what felt like two million battles, it finally happened.
His heart prevailed. For the first time.
Slowly, he turned to her, just before she started walking back towards the door. “Judy, if I kissed you right now, would you reject me?”
She stared at him with her mouth open. For a few seconds - probably hours - nothing happened.
Nick's mind kicked back in. It was a brief victory for his heart, less than four seconds ago, and already he regretted it. We've been fighting for so long and now you've ruined everything, you idiot! echoed through his head. Why can't you just...
And there it was. It was a micro-gesture, a single blink at the wrong moment and he would have missed it. But Judy shook her head. Although shake was definitely the wrong description here. The movement was so brief, so gentle, so easy to overlook. An answer so quiet you could easily miss it. As if the volume had been turned down to the minimum.
Barely audible, yet deafeningly loud to Nick.
The idea came to him before the confidence did. Nick hesitated, his paws hovering as if he weren’t quite sure he was allowed to touch her like that. His heart urged him forward. With a rush of adrenaline, he lifted Judy by her hips and sat her on the railing in front of him.
She was so close to him. So close.
The way his pulse roared in his ears so loudly he was certain she could hear it too. His heart, victorious but unsteady, had dragged him here. And now that it had won, it seemed just as terrified as he was.
He swallowed hard. “I'm supposed to look confident now,” he murmured, voice quieter than he intended. Her eyes softened, steady and reassuring, and something in his chest loosened just enough to let him breathe again. But eventually, his mind fell silent and his heart sang.
He leaned in slowly, painfully aware of every inch between them, giving her time to change her mind. His heart hammered, his nerves frayed. But when their lips finally met, it felt like stepping off solid ground and discovering, to his astonishment, that he could fly.
The rain was now dripping more heavily on the canopy, enveloping the two of them.
He himself broke through the last stones of the protective wall he had been maintaining when their lips touched.
Every warning his mind had screamed at him for weeks, dissolved into nothing but warmth and astonishment. The kiss was soft and yet it hit him like a tidal wave. It wasn’t fireworks or chaos; it was recognition. Like something inside him had finally clicked into place after being misaligned for far too long.
Judy wrapped her arms around Nick's neck and pulled him closer to her.
He should have known. How often do you hear that you should listen to your heart? And all those cheesy, saccharine quotes were freaking right.
For the first time in a long while, Nick Wilde wasn’t guarding himself. The instant she felt his hesitation give way, she knew. She had sensed his fear for weeks, the way he held himself back, the careful distance he forced between them. And now, in this kiss, she felt him choose her. And not just as a partner.
They pulled away from each other slightly and Judy pressed her forehead against his, her chin on his snout.
“I- Nick, you're... that was...”
“Just so we’re clear,” Nick interrupted her insecurely, glancing at her, “this is usually the part where I make a joke and emotionally retreat.”
Judy smiled at him, patient and warm. “And are you going to?”
He sighed. “I’m considering it. Strongly. Very on-brand for me. But," his voice changed, "I can’t, because Carrots... You're the one, Judy. I didn't tell you in Tundratown because I thought it was enough for you to know that you're the most important animal in my life. But it's not enough for me. You're so much more than that. You are my life.”
Judy stared at him with teary eyes and a gentle smile.
“Will I have to wait another decade for the next kiss?”
“The gondolas are still running. If we catch the next one, you'll only have to wait a few minutes.”
Judy jumped off the railing and hurriedly pulled Nick behind her.