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"What if he doesn't like me?"
"You've been friends for 5 years, Flux..."
"What if he's not ready?"
"Come on, Flux..."
"What if he doesn't like men and I ruin everything?"
"Flux..."
"What if he hates me?"
"FLUIXON!!!"
Fluixon visibly flinched at the sound of his older sister saying his full name. He took a deep breath and sat down on the couch.
Currently, the two siblings were in Cynikki's apartment. When she moved in with her r̶o̶o̶m̶m̶a̶t̶e̶ Cass, the room had been cold and filled with a lot of sad energy. But after four years of university, the dorm had become a cozy space with a homely atmosphere.
"Will you finally listen to me and stop poking holes in my carpet?" Cynnika asked, clearly furious. Fluixon wanted to say something, but his sister quickly interrupted.
"Flux, you know I love you, but oh my god, you have to tell him how you feel!"
"I can't, you know... Saps is my friend, and if he doesn't agree, my confession will ruin everything." Fluixon's voice grew noticeably quieter. Cynnika immediately knew he wasn't joking.
The thing was, towards the end of high school, Fluixon realized he had a crush on his best friend, Saparata. However, now, halfway through his first year of college, the purple-eyed boy is certain of his feelings. But can you blame him? After all, who could resist that white hair, beige irises, and that smile...
Oh god, that smile.
"I know how you feel, Flux, but eventually you'll have to tell him you like him. Otherwise, it'll destroy you from the inside." His sister's sudden words woke the boy from his trance. Now very aware of the present, he leaned forward and grabbed his head.
"Why does this have to be so hard?" He groaned, tugging at his black locks.
"Everything will be alright, raven." Cynikka comforted him, removing her hands from his hair.
"I even have an idea how you could tell him."
"HOW?!" Flux suddenly spoke, snapping out of his momentary depression.
"Tomorrow we're going to Schpood's New Year's party, remember? Invite Saparate and confess your feelings."
"What?" he asked, bewildered. He didn't want to admit it, but the plan, despite its simplicity, made sense. Probably even more so than his 60-point, four-page A4 project featuring five puppies, a ton of flowers, fireworks, and a Mexican band.
Yeah, Flux might have been a good strategist... but he wasn't much of a romantic.
"There's no 'what', Fluxie. You ask him tomorrow if he'd like to be your boyfriend and you kiss until dawn, is that clear?" Cynnika said with a wide smile, getting up from the couch.
"Ugh, you're disgusting!"
"And you're head over heels in love, so get to work!"
Flux couldn't stop thinking about Saparat for the rest of the day. He kept staring at the previously sent message.
Fluxie💜: Hi
Saps💙: Hi! What's up?
Fluxie💜: Want to go to Schpood's party together?
Saps💙: Sounds good, but what brought you to parties so suddenly? You hate them.
Fluxie💜: I want to try something new.
Saps💙: Hey, what did you do with the old Fluixon, you pathetic knock-off! 👿
Fluxie💜: Ha ha, very funny.
Saps💙: Btw, I'm glad you want to go!
Saps💙: I'll wait outside your room at 7 PM and we'll go together, okay?
Fluxie💜: Sounds good.
Fluxie💜: See you at 7 PM.
Saps💙: Can't wait ❤️
Saparata couldn't wait to go to the party with him. And he left a heart at the end!!!
Fluxion's heart pounded, even though he knew it meant nothing, as the two of them flirted with each other almost constantly.
Because of his sleepless habits, mostly caused by uncontrolled overthinking, he always had sleeping pills in his cupboard. Usually, due to his slightly undernourished frame, he only took one pill, but this time he was tempted to take two.
So, despite the unspoken feelings that gripped his thoughts, the boy fell asleep almost immediately.
"I'm not going anywhere."
"You're going."
"I'm not going."
"You're going!"
"No..."
"YOU'RE GOING!"
Cynikka's booming voice echoed through the room. The girl cared for her brother, but his hiding from the confrontation with Saparata was starting to get on her nerves.
Fluxion resignedly sank onto the couch, but even though the furniture itself was the most comfortable thing to sit on, the brunette was still tense, as evidenced by the twitching of his lower eyelid and the quiet twitching of his left leg.
After a moment, Cynikka left the room briefly, only to return with tea in hand.
"If not today, when, Flux?"
Although Fluxion was one of the most stubborn people on the planet, his sister's stubbornness was head and shoulders above his own.
"If not today, then never."
Five minutes before 7 p.m., his best friend knocked on the door of Fluxion's dorm.
"You look good, Saps," he greeted with a nervous smile.
"Thanks, Flux! Are you ready to party?"
"Yeah, sure..."
"Everything okay?" Saparata asked worriedly. He know his friend inside and out and knew when something was wrong.
"I'll be alright," Flux said, his voice laced with the uncertainty he'd so carefully concealed.
"Are you nervous about the party? Don't worry, it'll be fine. After all, we're going together, right?"
Oh, if only Saparata knew it wasn't about the party.
The student residence where Fluxion lived was fortunately located close to the very center of the city, so the walk from the dorm to Schpood's house was quite short, taking less than half an hour. It was already dark outside, but the road was quite well-lit thanks to the city streetlights. Every time they found themselves under one of those streetlights, Fluxion couldn't believe how long he could have been so blind. The warm light illuminated and added color to Saparata's snow-white skin. Fluxion could swear he saw small beige freckles on his friend's cheeks. When Fluxion looked a little higher, he saw pupils the same color as the hidden freckles on his cheeks. Long black lashes and eyeliner-adorned eyelids added contrast to his eyes. Finally, Fluxion couldn't tear his gaze away from his friend's lips. Compared to the rest of his face, they were slightly pink and, something the boy would have given his hand for, lip gloss.
When they finally reached Schpood's house, Fluxion couldn't hide his admiration. Schpood's parents were very wealthy, so they were able to give their son his own apartment in the city center and the means to become a perpetual student. No one knew how old he really was, but the fact that almost everyone at the university knew him spoke volumes. Although, Schpood was a cool guy nonetheless.
When the two finally entered, Fluxion's senses were immediately overwhelmed by the loud music and the sheer number of people inside.
"Damn, Schpood really showed off this year," Saparata said, equally surprised.
"You say that as if there weren't hundreds of people here every week," Fluixon snorted.
They both went inside and, after greeting all of Saparata's friends, sat down on a nearby couch. Fluixon took a deep breath and tried to clear his thoughts. The sooner he did, the sooner he'd get this over with.
"Saparata, I..."
"Want a drink?" Saparata interrupted.
"Wh-What?"
"I'm really thirsty, I'll get us something," Saparata said, getting up from the couch without even looking at his friend. He quickly walked to the kitchen, leaving Fluixon alone.
At first, Fluixon was annoyed to be left alone in a room full of strangers, but he had to admit that a drink would be a welcome boost.
Fortunately, just as they were starting to get bored, Saparata entered the room with two glasses in his hands. With a bang, the white-haired man collapsed onto the couch and began drinking. Fluixon wasn't a fan of alcohol, but he had to admit that the drink Saps gave him was very good. The drink had a noticeable hint of alcohol in the soda, but it wasn't too bitter, and the ice cubes added just the right amount of refreshment.
One of the things Flux liked most about his friend was the way they talked. No matter what topic they came up with, Saparata was always 100% engaged, making even a conversation that would normally bore the brunette seem like a big deal with Saparata, with a million different twists and turns. This is how their small talk escalated into a heated discussion about the threat posed by spiders found in bananas at the supermarket. Flux insisted that these were small incidents and shouldn't worry about them. Saps, on the other hand, insisted that there was always a slim chance of finding them there, and that was why he wouldn't eat bananas for the rest of his life. When people around him began to take an interest in their conversation, Fluixon realized it was already 9:00 PM. Damn, he had to hurry.
"Want to dance?" The brunette suddenly interrupted, staring intently at his already empty glass.
Saparata almost choked at this.
"I'm seriously starting to wonder if you're really some fake clone or something, Bro."
"If you don't want to..." He didn't manage to finish.
"Of course I do." Saparata smiled and pulled his friend into the middle of the room filled with dancing, drunk teenagers. At first, they both made very uncoordinated movements, but after a moment, they fell into a calm rhythm, swaying against each other. Fluixon felt his friend's arms wrap around his waist, a shiver ran through his body, but not the unpleasant kind caused by the cold or horror, but the pleasant kind caused by drinking warm tea in winter, petting his beloved cat, or feeling his beloved's breath on his lips. Fluixon couldn't help but wrap his arms around his neck. The brunette immediately looked down, missing his sister's smile and the thumbs-up from the girl sitting on her lap. Most importantly, he didn't notice the massive blush on his friend's face.
Suddenly, the entire atmosphere was interrupted by none other than Schpood himself. The brown-eyed man climbed onto a nearby table and began giving a loud speech in his own style. The two instantly separated. Both were red-faced.
"Ladies and gentlemen, I am glad that in this year, 2025, we will be seeing each other again to celebrate not only the end, but also the beginning..." At that moment, Fluixon stopped listening. He liked Schpood, but he really could have given up on speaking, especially when it interrupted his time with Saparata.
When Fluixon turned to Saparata to mock the host, he realized the white-haired man was nowhere to be seen. Curious, Fluixon walked a short distance only to see him chatting with his own friends. The purple-eyed man cursed under his breath and moved back to the nearby couches. The boy was so dazed by his previous interaction with Saparata that he didn't even notice he'd sat down right next to Cynikka and her new girlfriend, Cass.
"Congratulations, Flux! Well, that wasn't so hard, was it?" Cass smiled. Fluixon could tell that whatever his sister knew, Cass knew too.
"Congratulations on coming out of the closet, little brother," Cynikka snorted.
"I haven't told him anything yet, Cynn," the brunette stated nonchalantly.
"What!" They spoke in a chorus.
"What do you mean you didn't tell him?! You were literally making out!" Cynikka fumed.
"We haven't had a chance yet..."
"Flux," Cass interrupted. If looks could kill, Fluixon would be dead right where he was.
"If you don't tell him how you feel by midnight, I'll skin you alive."
"And you better hurry, you've got about an hour left," Cynikka added.
Before Flux could answer, the girls pushed him off the couch and told him to look for Saparata.
At first, Fluixon thought his friend would be where he was standing before, but besides a couple of teenagers kissing, he found nothing. He decided to check the kitchen, and oh god, how he wished he could go back in time and punch himself in the face. In the kitchen, Saparata and Turntap were embracing each other, clearly flirting. Fluixon almost fainted at the sight. He quickly left the room, and just as he was about to leave the party, he ran into his other best friend.
"Oh god, man, is everything okay?"
"Leave me alone, Thomas."
"Not so fast, Flux, I can see something's wrong."
"It's nothing." After these words, the brunette tried to get past his friend and run as far away as possible, but the brunette's strong arms held him in place. Thomas's arms weren't so bad after all...
"Calm down and let's talk. I can see you're on the verge of panic." After these words, Thomas led Fluixon outside. Schpood's garden was as impressive as the house itself. Trees and bushes surrounded them on all sides, and in the center stood a fountain with some kind of Greek or Roman sculpture.
"Want to tell me what happened?" Thomas asked, handing him a drink out of nowhere. Flux took a sip and immediately grimaced. He knew the brunette preferred stronger drinks, so to avoid being picky, he decided to drink the whole thing.
He didn't know if it was the alcohol or the emotions, but as soon as they finished their glasses, they started telling Thomas everything. From the beginnings of his crush to his jealousy over his crush's earlier flirtation.
"So jealousy is eating you up, huh?"
"You could say," Flux sighed.
"What if we make him jealous?" Thomas blurted out suddenly. Flux had always known his friend had stupid ideas, especially when he stole his teacher's gradebook in elementary school and kept writing straight A's, but this time he'd broken his stupidity record. Despite everything, Fluixon surprisingly agreed.
"Okay."
And that's how they both ended up in a chair right outside the kitchen. Flux sat on Thomas's lap as Thomas hugged him tightly around the waist, just like Saparata had almost an hour ago. Luckily, his sister and her girlfriend had long since left the room to find a secluded bedroom.
Fluxion and Thomas were having a good time flirting until Saps left the kitchen, presumably to look for a friend.
When Saps looked at Fluxion, his smile instantly faded. Instead of being angry like Fluxion had predicted, the white-haired boy grew sad and ran upstairs.
Fluxion immediately realized he'd screwed up. He got off Thomas's lap and ran upstairs to try and fix what had been broken.
Fluxion ran upstairs and saw Saps sitting alone on the balcony. He quietly stepped outside and sat down next to his friend.
They sat in silence for a while, watching the fireworks outside. Fluxion glanced at his phone and realized it was about five minutes until midnight.
"Hey," he said casually. When he didn't hear a response, he decided to continue.
"I'm sorry, Saps, I didn't mean for this party to turn out like this." Silence remained.
"Nothing happened between me and Thomas."
"You don't have to explain yourself, Flux. I have no right to get between you and Thomas. I'm just a little disappointed you didn't tell me sooner." Saparata glanced at the boy next to him, and only now could Fluixon see the tear tracks on his cheeks.
"I didn't tell you anything because there was nothing, Sap."
"It's okay."
"No, it's not okay. I screwed up, and I know it. I could have been honest with you from the very beginning, but I preferred to hide."
"You don't owe me anything..."
"I'm Sap because you're my best friend, and I..." He didn't finish. The words caught in his throat.
Outside, the fireworks began to appear more and more. Below them in the garden, he could hear people counting down to the new year. The sound was so loud that he had to shout to hear anything.
10.
"Saparata, I..."
9.
"It's okay, Flux, I understand."
8.
"You don't understand, I have to tell you something."
7.
"What?"
6.
", I... I love you."
5.
"What? I can't hear you."
4.
"I love you, Sap."
3.
"You have to speak louder."
2.
"I LOVE YOU, SAPARATA!"
1.
As the clock struck midnight, Fluixon couldn't hold back. If not now, then never. The brunette pulled his best friend in and captured their lips in a New Year's kiss. Saparata was shocked, staring wide-eyed at Fluixon, but when his brain realized what had just happened, he couldn't help but return the kiss, melting into him. The roar of fireworks and the screams of people would have given anyone a headache, but at that moment, only they mattered. Even though the kiss was sudden, they both felt like this was where they wanted to spend the rest of their time.
When their lips parted due to lack of oxygen, they were both silent. Bright, colorful fireworks exploded before them, yet they both stared at each other.
After a moment, Saparata broke into a broad smile and burst into loud laughter. Fluixon stared, stunned, still in shock that he had just kissed his best friend. After a moment, it seemed as if he had a flash of insight, and they, too, began to laugh at the absurdity of their situation.
When they finished laughing, Saparata, without saying a word, placed a small kiss on Fluixon's lips. For a moment, the two sat on the balcony, watching the fireworks and holding hands, but after a moment, they felt a sudden January chill and went inside.
Saparata pulled Fluixon onto the bed and smiled at him with that gentle and kind smile reserved only for him.
"I love you, Saps," Fluxion said, looking into his eyes.
"I love you, Flux," Saparata replied with an even wider smile.
After the party, when both were too tired to return, they lay down together in bed in one of Schpood's many guest rooms. Fluxion wrapped his arms around Saparate, and they both fell asleep, curious to see what the new year would bring them.