Actions

Work Header

gabecast

Summary:

a couple years after god's absence, the council decides to put gabriel (before his descend to hell) to work as their messenger and make educational broadcasts about the new regime to calm the population of heaven down. this is an excerpt from one of them.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

[WARBLED AUDIO, STABILIZED]

"-And I do hope that is of any tranquility to you all, my dear siblings. We musn't be afraid in the face of uncertainty. The horizon is less clear without Him, that is certain, but we must rejoice in His teachings and march forward. With Him in our minds, nothing will alarm us.

Now! We must move forward with my favourite part of the program! I must say, I do find it touching how many brothers and sisters have taken to writing to me in such times of uncertainty. Here is one from one of our devout sisters in Christ:

'Dear Archangel Gabriel,

Have the policies for permanence in Heaven changed at all, or is it that the world has become more sinful than before? My wife and I had just been discussing how we barely see any newcomers coming through the front gates.'

Thank you for taking the time to write me this letter, my dear sister! I must also thank you for wanting to confide in me with such a… ah, delicate question. As it stands, I can't share everything about how the Council has chosen to conduct gate policy, but what I can say is this- yes, some policies have been changed.

This is not to frighten anyone! Instead, I suggest we must all think of it like this: Say there is a farm and its livestock. One day, the farmer decides to leave and place the responsibility of the farm in his shephard sons' hands. Of course, when that happens, it is natural to expect changes in how the shephard sons handle their flock, and so I ask you to meditate upon something Would the sons not be stricter in the absence of their father so as to keep the farm tidy, just as their father would like? Would they not do so with the best interests of their flock in mind? That is exactly the moment we find ourselves in!

We pray for Father's return, as I am sure do all of you, but in His absence the Council must change a few things here and there. Again, this is not to cause any alarm! Let us rejoice in the Council keeping the 'farm' tidy and neat for the return of the Lord. And when He does - that I am certain He will -, He will reward us all for having been so well-behaved, that the Kingdom of Heaven has been kept just as he remembered it!

I hope that answers your question in a comprehensive manner. Okay! I see we have more time for another letter, so… oh, why not? Let me take another one, this one from another sibling:

'Dear Archangel Gabriel,

Is there any reason as to why the Council didn't include you in their leadership?'

Again, I must also thank you for writing this letter and even thinking of my own self enough to feel compelled to write! This one is of a more personal affair, and… and so I almost didn't consider including it tonight, but! I am certain others must have the same question in mind. I can understand why many would find it a confusing choice - and I did too, at first, how foolish of me! - but the truth behind it is far more banal.

Have I not been, throughout all of Earth's history thus far, God's messenger? Time and time again, my role has been clear; I have always been the one to bring forth the Lord's word and just that. I do not come close to the likeness of Michael, that, although my brother, we could not differ any more- Like most of the Council, who is composed of the likes that have fought Satan in arms and done far more to fight than I have!

When I put it like that, does it not become obvious as to why I was not called upon such a duty? Yes! I am aware that… that I have spent my fair time on Earth, that I have communed with humans as much as I have with virtues, and that I am, undoubtly, favoured by Father enough to have been able to announce important deeds to, ah… say, the Virgin Mary and Muhammed. But does that make me fit to rule? The answer is… no! What could I possibly do in a state of emergency in the Kingdom of Heaven when I've no experience fighting demonic forces myself? A good ruler knows both his people and its enemies. That is where I falter.

Now! Am I… particularly… ahem, upset by this? No…! No. No, I am not. I am continuing to do just as I have always done- I am continuing to spread the Holy Word, directly to you all, and I will always rejoice in doing so. I am more than happy to understand that I have far too many lofty ideals as opposed to the necessary iron fist! I… I shall continue putting said lofty ideals to use where they are best fit.

And, say, even if such a state of communicator ceases, I will… I will rejoice in a new role as well! We must all rejoice for whatever the Council sees fit. I know that if they deem me usable in some other sector, then they are right, and I will oblige. If they made me go to the depths of Hell, I would, for I am fit for anything I am assigned to.

So, please! Don't be upset on my behalf. I am not upset. This is the best possible position I could be in, because- see, I get to still commune and talk to you all! Ha! How joyful is it to keep such open communication with my people?

With that in mind, given that I have really stretched the time with our last letter, I must end tonight's broadcast. I thank you all, just as any other time, for listening to me. All I hope for is that each and everyone of you feel touched by the Holy Light tonight. He may be gone, but His power remains. His comfort remains. That is all. Thank you. Good night."

[END OF RECORDING]

Notes:

i had this idea floating in my mind 4 a while as soon as i noticed that gabriel's speech patterns (particularly the double speak) aligned with the speech patterns of another fascist character from another game i rlly rlly love... dr wallace breen from half life 2. so i decided, why not make a 'breencast' 4 gabriel?

i also wanted 2 have an explanation as 2 why the literal most important archangel in the bible wasn't leading heaven 2 begin w/, or why he was even made 2 do actions usually associated w/ the archangel michael instead LMAOOOO so here u go! some bullshit!!