Chapter Text
After the events of the Creel Mansion, seeing what happened to Max, the mind-bending trauma that consumed after the battle, witnessing Dustin holding a mangled Eddie’s body in the upside down and having to use both their strength to pry him off, Steve and Robin became inseparable in a way neither one could have ever planned for… set just a few days after the battle in season 4 instead of the 18 month time jump.
Steve’s house was empty- as per usual. After the “earthquake” his parents told him they needed to get out of town, go contact some of their clients, whatever that meant in the attorney world. But Steve was secretly relieved. He never got along with his parents anyways, really he had been raising himself for the last few years and those assholes would never understand everything he had been through anyways. So he embraced solitude like a badge of glory. But he still got lonely and there was only one person he wanted to call late at night when the trauma of last week's events began to consume his mind.
Meanwhile at her own house, Robin was tossing and turning in bed. It was only 9pm but lately she couldn’t sleep, couldn’t stay awake either. Every time she closed her eyes she was met with mind bending images of the upside down, or nightmares about the world ending. She rolled over and groaned when she saw the red lights of her clock only read “9:02”. Sitting up and throwing her pillow to the side, she flicked her lamp on. Like eerie clockwork her bedside phone began to ring. It made her jump a little.
“Hello…?” She answered, a bit skeptical at who would be calling this late.
“Robin! Hey, it’s me..”
“Well doesn’t this sound romantic.” Robin knew it was Steve, but she loved to tease him.
Steve rolled his eyes. “Yeah, yeah it’s the man of your dreams here to whisk you away…”
“Wow, sounds like you had that one planned” she teased back.
“Steve?” Robin said back when he didn’t respond.
“Listen, this is gonna sound kinda pathetic but are you also having trouble…” Steve began before Robin famously cut him off with one of her rambles.
“Sleeping? Every night Steve, I swear I’m laying here completely wide awake. And NOTHING turns it off, I can’t eat, I can't sleep, I can’t think, it feels like one more thought about what could’ve happened and I’ll lose my mind…” Robin’s voice cracked at the last words and she began silently sobbing into the phone. She didn’t expect it to hit her like that.
“Me too…it’s, it’s okay.” Steve said softly on the other end.
“Come over. My parents aren’t home, they’ll be gone for a few weeks, dealing with some clients of theirs I don’t even know.”
“You— your parents aren’t there?” Robin could feel her heart breaking. As miserable as she was, and despite her parents being utterly clueless about everything that had transpired, it still felt comforting knowing she wasn’t alone under her roof.
“Yeah…I’m used to it. To be honest I prefer it. But I…look I just don’t want to be alone and you’re kind of the only one I thought to call and…”
Robin wasn’t used to Steve rambling, it was kind of endearing.
“Steve. I’m on my way.”
Robin threw some clothes and her toothbrush into a bag and she left, giving her parents an excuse about staying at Nancy’s.
Steve was pacing around his house, the TV glowing in the background, playing reruns on the news about the aftermath of the “Hawkins Earthquake”. Such bullshit he thought.
The doorbell rang.
“Hey.” Robin said with a sad smile as Steve opened the door.
“Thanks for coming. I was just…”
“Watching more earthquake news?” Robin said, gesturing to the TV as she walked over to sit on the couch.
Steve scoffed. “Yeah. I might blow my brains out if I have to listen to one more sob story about how people lost everything.” He clicked the remote to some bullshit channel and threw himself onto the couch.
“Yeah me too….” Robin said as she sat down next to Steve.
Robin looked over at Steve who was clearly in a lot of pain. He never liked to show his emotions, she learned that pretty quickly over the last year of being his most unexpected friendship to date.
“I tried to call Henderson today.” Steve spoke up.
“Is he doing okay?” Robin said with a sadness in her voice.
Steve shook his head. “I don’t know man, I mean he’s been locked up at home avoiding everyone like the plague. I went to see him a few days ago and, god he looked like he had been crying for hours…”
“Can you blame him?”
“No…I just wish he wasn’t alone that’s all.”
“Let’s go see him tomorrow okay? Maybe we can talk him into staying here too for a few days.”
“Oh Robin… you don’t— you don’t have to stay here with me I was just feeling sorry for myself tonight…”
“Shut up Dingus, my parents think I’m staying at the Wheeler’s until at least Monday.” Robin smiled with a teary sadness in her eyes.
Steve smiled back, he was so grateful for Robin. He really had no idea what he’d do without her.
Without another word the two queued up a series of movies to watch on the Harrington's excessively large TV. Around 4 in the morning Robin woke up with a kink in her neck from falling asleep on one another.
“Steve…wake up…we totally passed out.”
Steve, awoken by the sound of Robin’s voice, suddenly sat up and rubbed his eyes. “Shit..” he moved his hand to check his watch, as his eyes adjusted to the early morning light peaking through the curtains.
“You want me to give you a ride to school later?”
“Relax there professor, we got 4 more hours until I have to be in intro to calculus”. Robin finally sat up and rubbed her face with her hands.
“Right…well are you still tired? You can sleep in the guest room, it’s just down the hall from mine, it’s all set up and everything.”
“Yeah, yeah no I could definitely use another hour or so of shut eye. Wake me at 7?” Robin yawned at her last word.
Steve smiled. He loved how comforting it felt having Robin here. Truly the only girl in the history of Steve knowing girls that he had no romantic feelings (well anymore that is) for, and just wanted her around all the time.
The two parted down the hall, and both knocked out until about 7:30. Followed by a very rushed stop at the local Stop n Shop for a breakfast sandwich and a diet pepsi for them both. Steve dropped off Robin at school just two minutes before the first bell. Both promised one another to meet right back in the parking lot at 3:00.
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Over the course of the next week, Steve and Robin were attached at the hip. On the second night at his house they finally got Dustin to agree to come over. After a brutal nightmare about Eddie dying, the two decided everyone was better off sleeping all together on the couch downstairs. Dustin sandwiched between the older two, a tower of pillows and blankets cradling them all. Steve insisted on driving Robin and Dustin to school every day, followed by picking them up. Each afternoon they would go to he and Robin’s shift at the Family Video, while Dustin brought whatever homework he had. Eventually Dustin’s mom threw a fit and demanded he come back home. The kid was pretty lucky to have a mom who truly cared as much as he did.
Steve’s parents phoned just once during the week to let him know they were still dealing with their clients out in Indianapolis . Having two big named attorneys in the state never really phased Steve as a kid- there were weeks where one or the both would be gone at the drop of a hat, especially if they had a certain type of case to deal with. He grew up with a series of random nannies, but once he was old enough to fend for himself, his parents (often stupidly) allowed him to stay home alone. Now at the old age of 19, he was free to be alone for over 2 weeks or more. It usually was a treat to stay at home alone. It made him feel like a true grown up. As fun as it was being “the babysitter” all these years, Steve loved any opportunity to truly be the man of the house. But lately it felt different. It felt isolating and depressing.
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Meanwhile, after a particularly rough day at school- Dustin was biking home, not in the mood for talking to anyone besides Steve and Robin, and even then they could just sit in silence, when Lucas and Mike stopped him in the parking lot.
“Dustin! Wait up man!” Mike was almost out of breath from jogging to keep up with Dustin who lately was fleeing the school like his life depended on it.
Dustin tensed up as soon as he heard his name. He knew how badly he had been neglecting the party lately, but he couldn’t help it. His battery was completely drained. He loved the guys, but sometimes he felt more comfortable being as upset as he was inside around Steve instead.
“So, um we haven’t seen you all week man, are you–” Lucas tried to get the words out.
“I’m fine guys, look I have to run but let’s talk around…”
“NO. Dustin, listen I know you’re going through it, but we just don’t want you to be all alone.” Mike spoke up, with some urgency in his voice.
Dustin could feel regret leaving his voice, “I’m not all alone guys…I’ve been staying at Steve’s last week…”
Right on cue, Mike and Lucas rolled their eyes, sighing simultaneously.
“Yup, you’re new best friend…” Mike muttered under his breath.
“I can HEAR you Mike. And look, he’s not my new best friend, it’s just that–”
“Oh BULLSHIT Dustin! You’ve been superglued to him ever since last year when you spent your entire summer at that stupid ice cream shop.” Lucas piped up.
“Well can you guys blame me?! Steve was actually there for me when the rest of you idiots weren’t after camp last year, and we just…we get along okay?”
Dustin drew in a breath, calming down a little, as annoyed as he was, he did feel a slight sense of guilt.
“Look. You know I love you guys, I don’t wanna start anything, I’m just having a really hard time lately after Eddie…and Steve was kind of there after it all went down. That’s all.”
“I get it man.” Lucas finally said, a little more understanding this time. “I just– don’t forget we’re here for you too.”
Mike nodded in approval.
As Dustin peddled off, after Mike and Lucas both left to go do some homework at Mike’s house, he felt worse than he did before entering school. Nothing was on his mind that was new, but it was just a rough day. He knew his mom was expecting him home, but he instinctively rode all the way to Steve’s house. He would phone his mom there and come up with some excuse.
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Steve’s house was the same. Lonely. He sat in the front room watching bullshit reruns on tv.
The doorbell rang, slightly startling him.
“Hey dude, I’m gonna order some pizza for dinner.” Steve said immediately upon opening the door, to Dustin.
Dustin secretly loved how Steve didn’t ever question why he showed up, or if he was okay, or what he needed. He just knew.
“Robin should be by after her shift at the video. I took off today…”
“You alright?” Dustin wasn’t trying to pry, but Steve never, ever took off work.
Of course the little shit could sense something was off. “Yeah, yeah man I’m ok, just needed to catch up on some house stuff, you know.”
Dustin nodded silently. “Yeah for sure.” He wasn’t going to push it if Steve didn’t want him to.
“So…how was school?”
“Oh great, yeah it was good, we had some quiz in history…bunch of bullshit man, I swear every time you think we’re free from a pop quiz…”
“Dustin.” Steve said, cutting him off.
“Come on, just tell me, it’s okay.”
Dustin should’ve known better too. Steve could pick up on his moods without even seeing his face.
“It sucked, alright.” Dustin threw himself back onto the couch. Steve followed and joined him.
“I just, I try to be present but I can’t explain it…I’m just…I don’t know, I feel…”
“Numb?” Steve said bluntly, staring down at his own feet.
“Yeah…exactly.” Dustin looked up at his older friend, a new wave of sadness washing over him. Was this how Steve was feeling too?
“I get it man. I really do.”
“It’s like even if I want to cry I can’t…like I’ve already got everything out and now nothing seems to matter.” Dustin looked down, kicking his feet as he spoke.
Steve had no clue what to say. He hoped the kid wasn’t just holding back his emotions for his sake, but to hear how badly Dustin was struggling to even feel anything was more concerning.
Suddenly Dustin broke the silence.
“Don’t get mad ok…but do you ever wish your parents were more…”
“Around? Yeah, sometimes Henderson.”
“It’s like they don’t even know me. And I guess that’s why it feels like this sometimes.”
This was probably the most vulnerable conversation the two had ever had, but it felt it was long overdue.
“I feel like that too when I think about my dad being gone…” the thought of his absentee father, bringing a surprising tear to Dustin’s eye.
“He left when I was really young, came around a few times over the years but I guess I wasn’t worth sticking around for so…”
Steve could feel his heart breaking- Dustin was the best kid he had ever met, and the thought of his own father not giving a shit about him made Steve feel physically ill.
“Nah, screw that Henderson. You know you’re worth all that and more.”
Dustin looked up, a little annoyed that the tears escaped his eyes. “Thanks man, you are too.”
Steve smiled sadly, clasping his hand on Dustin’s shoulder. “It’s gonna be ok, I promise.”
The two sat in silence for a while, while the TV continued to play random MTV music videos until the pizza arrived. Dustin phoned for his mom, and Steve actually got on the line and talked to poor Mrs. Henderson for a while, explaining that Dustin was honestly doing him a favor by being around with his parents being out of town and all. Dustin’s mom was a bit hard to convince that Steve was fine on his own, but he managed it.
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Later on after Dustin had gone to bed, the phone rang…it was Robin who had gotten caught by her parents trying to sneak out again to sleep at Steve’s.
“I’m sorry I got you in trouble with your parents…”
“Oh that? They needed a little excitement added to their week.” Robin was clearly trying to make Steve feel better.
He smirked. “Listen, I need to talk to you about Henderson.”
“Is- is he ok? What happened?” Robin was ready to sneak out again.
“No he isn’t, and I don’t know how to help him. He came over today and he was really off, told me he’s having trouble not feeling numb. I told him I felt the same- and I do, it’s just that he’s a kid man, he shouldn’t be dealing with any of this.”
“I know…” Robin was at a loss too. She wanted so badly to help Dustin, but he was stubborn.
“You think he’s just being tough? Like faking it?”
“Nah, no way, he told me himself he can’t even cry he just feels like nothing matters.”
Why did she have to explain everything to men…Robin thought as she began to roll her eyes. “Steve, that’s a classic line all guys say when they are dying inside but they don’t want to show their feelings to each other.”
“What? That’s bullshit. Henderson is not that way at all…” Steve refused to believe that was even remotely true.
“Mark my words, he’s pushing it away, because it’s easier to feel nothing, than feel everything.”
Steve and Robin hung up after chatting for another few minutes, and he couldn’t sleep now thinking of what she had said. He decided he would try one more time to really talk to Dustin tomorrow.
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8am the next morning- Dustin awoke feeling dizzy and groggy. The same he felt for every day of this miserable week. Steve was downstairs waiting for him. He called Dustin’s mom and begged her to let him take him out of school for the day, he had an idea of how to get through to him.
.Dustin approached the kitchen, where Steve was pouring some cereal.
“You’re up? I thought you would sleep until 10am minimum.”
“Funny. Listen, I sort of called you out of school today. And don’t worry your mom knows.”
“Whatever…” Dustin said, not a hint of anything in his voice. Which honestly scared Steve even more. He usually would’ve combated with some ridiculous slew of questions.
“Yeah, yeah so listen, I thought we could take a little field trip of our own, whaddaya say?” Steve crossed his fingers he wouldn’t get shot down.
“I literally don’t care what we do Steve.”
It was obvious this was going to be harder than Steve initially had thought.
“Alright, let’s go then!” Steve swung his keys in his hands and started for the door- not even giving Dustin a second longer to stall.
They drove in complete silence, neither one even stopping to look at one another. A lot of their drives this week were like that, no one needed to say anything.
Before Dustin could even process what this little “field trip” was all about he looked out the window and realized where they were.
The Hawkins Cemetery.
“Shit” he thought to himself. Steve was good. Real good.
“Okay man, let’s go.” Steve turned the ignition off and looked over at a flabbergasted Dustin.
“You– you’ve got to be kidding right?”
“Yeah no, come on dude…we're going to see his grave.” Steve didn’t even have to say the name for Dustin to know they were about to go visit Eddie…
“I don’t need to do this…I’m fine.” He wasn’t going to let up even for a second.
God this kid was so stubborn. Steve knew he had to just keep going along with it and not take no for an answer.
“Okay look Dustin. This “I don’t care about anything” behavior…I know how bad this is killing you. I know it’s all an act, and you just don’t want to really admit how you truly feel. And shit, I’m– I’m saying this all super insensitive and wrong, and I don’t even know how to say it the right way, but I love you man, okay? I’m here for you, however you’re feeling. I just want you to know that and I guess I thought about bringing you here because maybe you could go say whatever you need to say…whatever you’re holding on to…to Eddie. It’s not too late even though you think it is. I promise you it isn’t. But please don’t shut yourself out, not to me, I don’t care if we sit in silence every day, or if you just want to be mad, or scream, or break something, or even if you just feel like crying…that’s– that’s okay too.”
Dustin stared back at Steve. He wasn’t even sure when but he clasped his hands to his cheeks, and tears were falling down rapidly. He crossed his arms as he started crying more, covering his face with his hands. All the pain he was building up was too much to handle after that little speech from Steve. Dammit, he always, always knew how to crack him.
Steve without hesitation walked over and grabbed Dustin, holding him while he cried.
“It’s my fault…” Dustin choked out, through muffled sobs.
“What…?” Steve released his hold to push Dustin back, holding him by the shoulders. “What is?”
“Eddie…I shouldn’t have let him go back that night. He was with me…and he–he cut the rope and rode back to where the bats were…I could’ve–”
“No. Don’t do that. You didn’t make his choice…it is not your fault Henderson. You hear me?” Steve wanted to really make sure the kid heard him on this one.
Dustin nodded, as another sob escaped his mouth. His shoulders shook.
Sighing, Steve pulled Dustin back in, holding the back of his head. “It’s okay…” he said softly.
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Later on that night, Steve dropped off Dustin back at his mom’s, he figured he would need a night to decompress. He'd call tomorrow to check in. For now, he was emotionally exhausted himself.