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The mug was definitely gone.
Josh had looked everywhere in his office for the 16-ounce white ceramic mug with the periodic table printed on the side. He had noticed immediately that it was missing from the shelf where he kept his mugs. The other two were still there exactly where he expected them to be: a beige Johnson & Johnson mug and a purple Zyprexa mug. They were both swag from medical conferences he’d attended in the past.
He wouldn’t have cared if either of those mugs had gone missing, but he did care about the one that did. It was larger than either of them, so it could hold more coffee and he needed to make fewer trips to the break room. He really liked the image as well. It was a reproduction of a vintage periodic table.
The mug was also a gift from Wolf.
Josh sighed. There wasn’t a lot of clutter in his office, so he’d been able to search the area fairly quickly. He even checked all of the drawers and filing cabinets even though he knew there was no way he would have placed the mug in any of them. He’d looked in the break room as well even though he knew he would never have left it there.
The thought had occurred to him that it might have been accidentally broken by the cleaning staff, and they’d been too afraid to tell him. He hadn’t considered this for very long though, because it would have meant that the mug was gone forever.
So there he was again, moving books around on his shelves as if the mug would magically materialize on one of them.
“Looking for something?”
Josh turned around to see Nurse Silva standing in the doorway, smirking at him. He felt embarrassed, then told himself he was ridiculous for feeling that way. Nurse Silva had no idea what he was looking for.
“Missing a mug? The one with the periodic table on it?”
Josh’s eyes widened. Surely Nico couldn’t read minds! It was an absurd thought, one that Nico clearly was unaware of because telepathy wasn’t real. But perhaps Nico had found the mug somewhere and was returning it to him. He felt a spark of hope in his heart.
“I am. Did you find it somewhere?” Josh asked, sounding more eager than he’d intended.
“Not exactly,” Nico said casually, starting to examine his nails.
“What do you mean? Do you have it or not?” Josh couldn’t quite keep the annoyance out of his voice. If Nico had it why wasn’t he returning it to him?
“You have to do something first.” There was a smug smile on Nico’s face.
Josh crossed his arms and stared at Nico incredulously. “Are you trying to ransom my coffee mug?”
“Yes!” Nurse Silva replied cheerfully.
Not only had the mug been stolen for some inexplicable reason, it was now being held hostage until its kidnapper’s demands were met. Josh couldn’t quite believe what was happening. He just wanted his mug back.
“Very funny. I’d like my mug back now.”
“Why do you care so much about it?” Nico tilted his head and grinned. “Is it because Dr. Wolf gave it to you?”
“No!” Josh said defensively. “I want it back because it’s mine. Come on, give it back. I’m not in the mood for this right now.”
“You’ll get it back. You just have to pick a fight with Dr. Wolf first.”
“What? You can’t be serious.” Josh studied Nico's expression, expecting him to laugh and give up on the joke any moment. He probably didn’t even have the mug at all and had just made a lucky guess about what Josh was missing.
Nico just shrugged. “I guess you don’t care about that mug after all.”
“It’s my property! You can’t just take things that don’t belong to you. I want that mug returned now.”
“You know what you have to do. Just make sure I get to watch when it happens.”
Nico leaned against the doorframe and smiled smugly at Josh again, unfazed by the increasingly hostile expression that was directed at him.
“I will fire you,” Josh threatened.
Nico snorted in response. “For what?”
“Theft! Of personal property. Hey stop, where are you going? I want that mug!” Josh sounded increasingly desperate as Nico laughed and walked away from him.
“You know what you have to do,” he said in a taunting tone before he got out of earshot.
Josh sank into his chair, feeling defeated. It was only a temporary setback, though. He vowed that he would do whatever it took to get his mug back. (Except what Nurse Silva had asked him to do.)
Josh wasn’t proud of what he did next.
It was easy enough to search Nurse Silva’s workstation while he wasn’t there. He even managed to do it while awkwardly making conversation with Nurse Flores, who he had almost nothing in common with. She made an excuse to escape the uncharacteristically friendly chief as soon as possible, leaving him free to quickly open and close the drawers. He didn’t find the mug.
Nico’s locker was the next location to check out. Josh went there in the middle of a shift to reduce the chance that he’d be caught applying the lockpicking skills that he’d acquired from YouTube. The mug wasn’t there either.
He was looking up Nico’s home address when his phone buzzed. It was a text from Beau. He decided to read the message later and opened his Maps app to enter the address. He stared at the dot representing Nico’s address on the map for a moment before a voice in his mind asked him what the hell he thought he was doing.
It was a mug. He was considering breaking into an employee’s house to retrieve a fucking mug. But it felt insufferable, knowing that Nico had it and was obnoxiously refusing to return it. He should just let it go. It was only a mug after all. There was nothing special about it. He could probably find the exact same mug online if he wanted.
Just a mug.
Josh closed Nico’s employee record and cleared the address from his phone. He sat back in his chair and closed his eyes. Getting into a fight with Wolf wasn’t anything out of the ordinary, although it hadn't happened since he told him that he was with someone.
Thinking about Beau reminded him to read the message he’d ignored earlier.
Are we still on for dinner at my place tonight?
Beau was going to cook dinner for him, something he’d never done when they dated before. He was still the same person in many ways, but he treated Josh very differently after they’d gotten back together. Josh had felt like he was taken for granted before, that Beau had only cared about his own needs and wants. Now he was always asking what Josh wanted, and meeting him halfway if they disagreed on anything. It was refreshing.
Josh texted him back: Yeah, can’t wait
He considered adding a heart emoji to the end of the text, but it didn’t feel right. His thoughts drifted back to what he’d have to do to get his mug back.
“I want proof.” Josh glared down at Nurse Silva, taking full advantage of his height to try to intimidate him.
“Proof of what?” Nico asked coolly, annoyingly oblivious to how short he was next to Josh.
“That you actually have my mug. Take a photo of the mug with today’s newspaper.”
“Newspaper? How old are you? I’ll send you a photo and you can look at the metadata.” Nico paused. “You do know how to do that, right?”
Josh stalked off, swearing under his breath.
Several hours later he received a text from Nurse Silva. It was a selfie of him with a shit-eating grin, the mug pressed obscenely against his cheek. Josh was outraged. If he wasn’t so focused on rescuing his mug, he would already be thinking of ways to take revenge.
Nurse Silva was leaning against the wall of the hallway just outside Josh’s office, casually checking his phone. Josh had told him when he was meeting with Wolf, and thankfully Wolf was on time. He made sure that the blinds were open so that Nico had a clear view of them, then scowled and flipped him off before closing the door.
Wolf sat down on one of the chairs next to the coffee table across from the couch. Josh was about to take his usual seat on the couch, then realized that Nico wouldn’t be able to see him if he did that because his back would be to the window. He sat awkwardly in the chair next to Wolf, who raised an eyebrow, seeming slightly confused.
“So what did you want to talk to me about, Chief Nichols?”
Josh cleared his throat. He had fielded some minor complaints about Wolf from the staff since he’d taken the position of Chief Medical Officer that he had said he would address but never did. He had justified this by telling himself he had never specified exactly when they would be addressed. Perhaps Wolf would take the bait before he had to address them at all.
“You were doing well with turning your charts in on time, but you’ve been slipping recently.”
Wolf considered his words briefly, then said, “That’s true. I’ll do better.”
Josh was unprepared for Wolf to agree so readily with him, and his mind blanked as he tried to think of something else to say. He regretted not making a list.
“Okay, great.” He suddenly remembered something Thorne had said to him recently. “You’re sometimes not available for consults when you’re on the schedule. It’s really important for you to be on site or on call when you’re supposed to be.”
This was a somewhat ridiculous thing to bring up given that Wolf was practically living at the hospital and had often consulted when he wasn’t on the schedule at all. But maybe that meant he would be provoked into defending himself, preferably in a manner that was visually obvious to the pesky nurse lurking outside.
Wolf frowned. “When? When Thorne needed a consult for Michelle? I had to deal with a personal matter, but I made sure my interns were available.”
“You needed to let someone know.”
“I did. My interns knew.”
“Someone else.” Now Josh was getting somewhere. He glanced discreetly out into the hallway to check if Nico was watching. Nico made a gesture with his hand that indicated he wanted more, and Josh had to refrain from flipping him off again.
“Like who? You?” Wolf looked mildly annoyed.
“Sure.”
“Fine. I’ll text you the next time this extremely rare situation occurs. Hopefully it will be in the middle of the night.”
Josh didn’t have anything to say in response, but he felt like he was on the right track. The mention of Michelle reminded him of something he’d heard (or rather, overheard) about Wolf’s interns stealing an ambulance to transport her to New Jersey. They hadn’t actually made it there, and the ambulance was never reported stolen, so Josh hadn’t been forced to take action, but bringing this up to Wolf would probably get the result that Nico wanted.
“Your interns stole an ambulance.”
“No they didn’t, that’s absurd,” Wolf declared, but wouldn’t make eye contact with Josh.
“They were seen loading Michelle into an ambulance and driving away.”
“And yet there she was, back in the hospital when I went to check on her.”
“Back in the hospital? You’re admitting that you know she was taken out of the hospital?”
“Well, according to this ridiculous scenario you’ve described to me.” Wolf scoffed. He certainly didn’t look happy, but he was nowhere close to engaging in an argument. Josh groaned inwardly. Trust Wolf to not fight with him the one time he needed him to.
“Your interns are out of control. You need to do a better job of getting them in line.” Josh tried to sound as antagonistic as possible.
“Maybe I do. Otherwise I wouldn’t be losing half of them.” Wolf sighed and leaned back in his chair.
Josh froze. He wanted to comfort Wolf, to tell him that he had done an amazing job with his interns and taught them so much about how to be better doctors and better people. He wanted to hug him and tell him that he had done nothing wrong at all.
He looked out the window again. Nico feigned a yawn, then checked his imaginary watch and tapped it, looking meaningfully at Josh. He should have just given up on the stupid endeavor. But that would mean he might never see his mug again.
He thought about Wolf showing up at his office with two mugs of coffee. It was soon after they’d started dating and Josh had felt that electric nervousness of being with someone new. Wanting an excuse to see Wolf, he had cleaned the mug and gone to his office to return it.
“Keep it,” Wolf had said. “I want you to have something of mine.”
“Why did you take so long to tell me that you wanted to be with me?” Josh asked, perfectly aware that he might be walking into a minefield.
“What?” Wolf narrowed his eyes.
“I waited for you. Even though you never asked me to. Even though you didn’t give me any sign that I should.”
“I was dealing with shit. You knew this. You said you understood.”
“Well maybe I didn’t. Because I wouldn’t have done the same thing to you.”
Wolf’s eyes flashed with anger. “You have no idea what I was going through. What I’m still going through. You’re too busy fucking your new old boyfriend and calling me in here to give me a hard time about inconsequential things.”
“Leave him out of this,” Josh said through gritted teeth.
“How can I? He has everything to do with this. You’re blaming me for taking too long to tell you how I feel so you don’t have to feel guilty for getting together with someone so soon.”
“I didn’t want to be with someone else. I wasn’t going out there looking for—trust me, I wasn’t in a hurry to get my heart broken again.”
Wolf seemed surprised by Josh’s admission, as if he hadn’t known the depth of Josh’s feelings for him. He shook his head.
“Yet here you are with someone else. Because it’s easy. Not like it was with me.”
“I liked that it wasn’t easy with you,” Josh said softly.
Wolf didn’t say anything in response and they sat there quietly for a while. Josh thought about being with Beau. They hadn’t fought since they’d gotten back together. They didn’t fight much when they were together the first time, either. They certainly hadn’t disagreed as radically as he and Wolf had about a patient’s treatment. He wasn't being challenged all the time. They could just have quiet, pleasant evenings together. It was peaceful.
“Why are you bringing all of this up now? You moved on. You’re happy now,” Wolf said flatly.
Josh looked at Nico again and saw him give a thumbs up before walking off.
“Yeah. I’m sorry. I’m a dick.”
Wolf managed a small smile. “I know.”
“Fuck you,” Josh said grumpily to Nico as he grabbed his mug out of the nurse’s hand.
“Now, is that any way to talk to someone who’s just brought you such a nice gift?” Nico chided him.
“You stole my mug and then ransomed it!”
“Hey, it was for a good cause.” Nurse Silva was unrepentant.
“What cause? Is this how you get your kicks?”
Nico smiled sympathetically at Josh. “Nah, I knew something was wrong with my dads. I had to try to fix it.”
“What do your dads have to do with anything?” Josh asked, confused.
Nico sighed and started to explain as if he was speaking to a child. “I mean you and Dr. Wolf. You stopped fighting. It wasn’t a good sign.”
“We are not your dads. There is no ‘me and Dr. Wolf’. I have a boyfriend.”
“Right, right. You dated him before, didn’t you? What makes you think it will work out this time?”
Josh crossed his arms. “First of all, that is none of your business. But things are a lot better this time. It’s like he’s a better version of himself.”
Nico shrugged. “I wonder, is even the best version of himself as good as an okay version of Dr. Wolf?”
Josh tried to say something in response but couldn’t.
Wolf was sitting at his desk, working intently on his charts. It made Josh feel unreasonably pleased. He was holding a mug of coffee and knocked on the open door of Wolf’s office with his free hand to get his attention, then went inside when Wolf beckoned him in.
“Hey, is this a good time to talk?” Josh asked.
“I could do with a break from—“ Wolf gestured at the pile in front of him. “—this.”
Josh smiled awkwardly and closed the door behind him, then took a seat on the chair in front of Wolf’s desk and set his mug down.
“I’m really sorry about what happened the other day. I should be supporting you. Being a friend. Not attacking you or whatever the fuck I was doing.”
Wolf nodded. “It’s okay. I think we both had things we needed to say.”
“I broke up with my boyfriend. My ex-boyfriend. My ex-ex-boyfriend.” Josh stared intently at his hands.
“You did? What happened?” Wolf asked, not sounding as sympathetic as perhaps he should.
“Nothing, really.” Josh looked back up and met Wolf’s eyes. “I just didn’t think we had a future together. It wasn’t what I was looking for in a relationship.”
“I’m sorry. I hope you do find what you’re looking for.”
Josh’s heart began to race. He was starting to second guess himself. What right did he have to ask for anything from Wolf, after everything that had happened between them? But he’d never forgive himself if he didn’t try.
“I think I had it. What I wanted. I had it with you.”
Wolf didn’t say anything, but he looked thoughtful, studying Josh’s expression for a while as if he was trying to determine if he was being honest. He listened intently as Josh continued.
“I know you don’t owe me anything, and I don’t expect anything from you, but I wanted to tell you how I feel. Because I haven’t for so long, and that’s not okay.”
Josh stood up slowly and turned to go. “I’ll let you get back to work.”
“Wait.” Wolf got up from behind his desk and moved to stand in front of Josh, looking up into his eyes. “You broke up with him for me?”
“I hoped that you’d want to be with me if I did, but I don’t want you to feel bad if you—“
Wolf interrupted Josh by kissing him quickly then stepping back. They both looked surprised, even Wolf, even though he had been the one to initiate the kiss. The shock lasted only for a moment, though, as Wolf moved close to kiss Josh again, letting himself sink comfortably into Josh’s embrace.
“I missed you,” Wolf mumbled against Josh’s lips. “I missed us.”
“I missed you too. And I know this makes me a dick but I missed you while I was with him.”
“I already told you, I know you’re a dick,” Wolf said with a chuckle.
Josh laughed and hugged Wolf even harder, taking his time to kiss him and breathe him in, to familiarize himself again with the feel of his body under his hands. Finally, he released Wolf and sighed.
“I have to get back to my office for a meeting. Can I take you out to dinner tonight?” Josh looked apologetic.
“I’d rather eat in,” Wolf said boldly.
Josh grinned and picked his mug up from the desk. “I’ll meet you at your place.”
Wolf looked at the familiar mug in Josh’s hand. “Hey, did I give that to you?”
Josh nodded. “You did. I was going to return it, but I think I’m going to keep it instead.”
“You should.” Wolf gave Josh a final kiss before he left the office. “It’s a great mug.”