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Karen’s lasagna was, as always, incredibly delicious.
Once they had finished the DND campaign he had spent weeks organizing, and Holly had taken their place along with her friends, they all went upstairs for lunch.
A wave of nostalgia washed over him, seeing his sister like that; she reminded him of a younger him just a few years ago. He felt as though he’d lived five different lives since that day, since the day everything began. Since the day Will went missing. Will.
They cried before finishing the game. Cried for all the pain Vecna had caused. Cried from the traumas they now had to face. Cried because they were no longer kids. Cried for all the people they’d lost. Barbara. Bob. Billy. Eddie.
Eleven.
They all knew she was… gone. But they chose to believe anyway. Maybe she was finally free, far from Hawkins, finding her true self, discovering who she was meant to be. At peace.
Mike truly hoped she was at peace, wherever she was now. He had been especially affected by the situation. Though he had never really been in love with her, he had loved her deeply. Not romantically, but as a best friend. She had become one of his best friends, teaching him a lot of important things he didn’t even know about himself. He would grieve her forever, he knows that. But he wasn’t the only one suffering, and he was aware. Dustin, Lucas, Max were too. Everyone. But there was…
Will.
The day she… passed, Will stayed silent. He didn’t cry, he didn’t scream. He just… existed. No one made any attempt to get him to speak – though trying would have been a waste of time. Mike stuck by his side. A week had passed before Will finally showed any sign of emotion. Mike was with him in his new room at the cabin. El’s room. It was still filled with her things, with her scent, her essence. No one had dared to touch anything, not even Hopper.
They were lying on her– now his– bed, not really doing anything. Will had spent the last days just lying there, sleeping or lost in thought. He barely ate. He was depressed. And Mike knew he wouldn’t be able to get him to speak or do something, but he felt like he needed to be there. He wanted to be there. So he stayed.
Will sat up suddenly, walked to a corner of the room, knelt down and picked something up from under the desk. From Mike’s vantage point, it looked like a small notebook, covered in stickers. Will stayed perfectly still, just looking at it. Then he opened it, and went through the pages. Mike simply watched him. Not stared. Watched. He was so focused that he barely registered when Will gripped the side of the desk and slumped to the floor with a heavy thud. Sobbing. Mike scrambled up and rushed over.
“Will. Hey, hey, what’s wrong? What did you…” He saw it. The notebook, now closed, had a cute cover he assumed El had decorated.
Wondertwins memories ❤️
To: Will The Wise
From: Jane (Eleven) The Mage
(Heroes by Peter Gabriel)
He knelt beside Will, and hugged him from behind. The boy was still sobbing, crying hard. Mike could almost feel the pain Will was enduring. Yes, he had lost a friend, but Will… He had lost a sister. And he knew how much she meant to him. Their connection ran deeper than anyone else’s. They understood each other perfectly, and Will had lost her forever. And, as always, Will’s pain was his own.
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Will..”. He hugged him tightly, so tightly, and Will melted into the embrace, clutching the notebook.
“It’s..” It was the first word Will had spoken since Eleven was gone. He’d spent the past week communicating only with nods or shakes of his head when he was asked something. “Huh? What is it, Will?”
Will could barely speak through the sobs, gasping for air. “Cmon, breathe… It’s okay. Just breathe with me, yeah?” Will calmed down a little bit, and finally spoke.
“It’s my fault…” His voice was shattered. “What? No! No, Will, it’s not… Why would you think that?” The boy turned his head to look at him, his eyes red-rimmed and swollen, face etched with exhaustion. And Mike still couldn’t help but think he was heartbreakingly beautiful.
“She’s been saving me for y-years… Even before we knew each other. And I… I couldn’t save her. Not even once.” Knowing that Will felt like that genuinely broke his heart.
“You did save her, Will. You made her feel human. You were the best brother she could have asked for.”
Will let out a broken laugh. “Did she tell you that?”
“Yes. She did.”
“What…?”
“When you were away in Lenora, she mentioned you in every letter. She said she felt so happy whenever she was with you. That she loved painting with you, that you taught her to draw in a way that made her feel special… loved, not judged. She loved just spending time with you, even doing nothing. She adored going to the movies with you, and discovering new music. She loved how understood you made her feel. She was so grateful to have you when she had nightmares, because you had them too, and you’d sleep side-by-side, and she felt safe, safe by your side. She told me… she told me that you being her brother was the best thing that ever happened to her, and she wouldn’t change it for anything. She loved you, Will, with her whole heart. And she would hate you thinking like this. She’d want you to be happy.”
Mike was crying now, too, and Will turned fully to hug him, sobbing hysterically again, the notebook pressed between them. The only thing he had left from his sister. They stayed there on the floor, crying, grieving, mourning together.
“She didn’t deserved that. She was supposed to be free, she was supposed to go to school and feel l-like a fucking normal person. I want her back, Mike. I need her back. I miss her so much.” Will cried.
“I know. I know, Will. I miss her too.”
Eventually, they calmed down, and Will went through the notebook. They laughed and cried over pictures of him and El in Lenora, drawings she’d attempted after Will taught her the basic skills, little notes she wrote to Will thanking him for everything. She had been planning to give it to him as a present for his eighteenth birthday.
Hopper told me about butterflies. They are insects, colorful. They fly.
You and I are butterflies. I’m purple, you’re yellow.
One day we will fly away together. As brother and sister.
Love you so much.
-El
That was the last thing Eleven got to write in the notebook.
A purple butterfly flew past the window.
Will was doing better now, but he still had really hard days, days where he just cried. And Mike, of course, stayed by his side. Always.
But he knew he was still a coward. Because he also knew…
There wasn’t a single day he didn’t think about when Will came out to everyone, the day he admitted he didn't like girls, and also the day Mike started putting the pieces together, realizing that Will, his best friend since… forever, basically, had a crush on him. Had. Because if he’d understood correctly, Will was over him by then. They never broached the subject again, and he wanted to, desperately wanted to. But he’d never found the courage, and he hated himself for it.
Today, though, he felt.. different. After talking to Hopper before graduation, he realized that he was leaving himself behind. His hobbies, his passions… everything. He was becoming the version of himself he’d always wanted to erase. He was… a carbon copy of his dad.
At the end of the summer, Max and Lucas were planning to leave for college together in California. Dustin was leaving too, though he was not leaving Indiana. And Will… Will wanted to leave as well.
New York.
And Mike knew– he knew– he was going to lose him. Will would never come back to Hawkins, especially now that Joyce and Hopper were moving to Montauk. And he wouldn’t see him again, because he was a coward. He would stay in Hawkins, working a lame job and leaving his passion for writing stories in the past. He would marry some random woman he didn’t even love, and spend the rest of his life in a miserable marriage, just like his parents.
They’d probably meet again on some random day in thirteen years from now at a party reunion, and he’d have to face Will with another man. Someone who made him happy, made him smile, was building a future with him. Another man who wasn’t Mike. And the thought was destroying him. Absolutely destroying him.
“Mike, honey!”
Will? Oh, no. His mom. “Dude, you totally zoned out. We’re leaving, it’s getting late.” Lucas said.
“Wh- Oh, oh yeah, of course, sorry, I was just… Anyways, yeah. Let’s… let’s go.” He stammered.
“You okay?” Dustin asked, eyeing him.
“Yeah! Yeah, absolutely, don’t mind me.”
“Ooookay. Whatever. Lucas, I didn’t bring my skateboard. Can I ride with you?”
They headed out to the garage where they kept their bikes parked. Everyone said their goodbyes and took off. Will lingered. “Are you sure you’re okay? You really spaced out back there.” He gave a soft chuckle.
“...Yes. Yes, don’t worry. It was nothing.” Coward.
“Mm, okay then…” Will said, sounding unconvinced. “See you tomorrow?”
“Yeah. Tomorrow.”
Well, I’ve been afraid of changin’
‘Cause I’ve built my life around you
But time makes you bolder
Even children get older
And I’m getting older too
Will grabbed his bike.
“It was a seven.”
“Huh?”
“The roll, it was a seven. The Demogorgon… it got me.”
Mike stares.
“Well, see you tomorrow!”
Will leaves. The lights flicker.
Mike grabbed his wrist. Will turned to look at him, surprise and confusion painted across his face. His beautiful face. Their eyes locked.
“Do you wanna be friends?”
Will nods, happy.
It was the best thing I’ve ever done.
“Am I really just your Tammy?” He’s tearing up.
“...What?”
Binary star sink like the setting sun
Too happy with ourselves to notice when the change had come
So you think
The losing side would never break dividing lines
But sanctity wasn’t in doubt
Me and Michael
“What you said. At The Squawk. I figured you were talking about me when you said you had a crush. I need to know. Was it really just a crush?”
Will looks at him, startled. “Mike… Why are you bringing this up now? Why…”
“Will, I can’t.” “You can’t what? Like me back? I know that, Mike! That’s why I’ve already-”
“I can’t be just a crush. I can’t be just you Tammy. I need… Don’t leave me. I want to go with you. I want to leave for New York with you, I want us to rent an apartment together. I want a future with you.”
“Mike… Mike, what, what are you…?”
“I… I love you, Will. I love you. Please. I’m sorry. Fuck, I’m so sorry.” Mike let go of his wrist and started crying, really crying. He covered his face with his hands, ashamed. Will didn’t love him back. He was late. Too late. He’d always been late. He feels Will’s warm hands on his hands, pulling them away to look at him. Will was looking at him, really looking. And he was… crying, too. Mike had made him cry again.
“Shit, no… No, Will, don’t cry, I-”
“Mike…”
“No, no, please… just let me talk. Let me say what I should’ve said years ago.” Will didn’t protest, just waited, his gaze steady. He was… such a beautiful crier. Focus, Michael.
“I’m just… I’m so incredibly sorry. For everything, for everything I’ve said to you, for the way I’ve treated you. I was just… I was just so scared, Will. And I know that’s not an excuse, I’m not trying to excuse myself, I’m just… so in love with you. I think I always have been. But when I started to realize, I froze, and I started acting like a complete asshole. I treated the person I care about most like shit, and you have no idea how much I regret it. I don’t deserve you. I don’t deserve your forgiveness, I know I don’t. But… I love you, Will. So much it hurts. And I don’t want to be scared anymore. Loving you isn’t scary; it’s amazing. You’re amazing. I don’t want to spend forever missing you, I can’t lose you, not again. I need you. I want you. I love you. I love you.”
They were holding hands, and Will was looking at him with an intensity that stole his breath. Mike loved his eyes. Will was still crying. “Do you remember… the day I unlocked my powers?”
“The day you became a sorcerer.” Will laughed softly. “Yeah… I… Do you know how I found the strength to use them? To believe in and accept myself?”
“...How?”
Will smiled. “I thought about my favorite things… my favorite people. I saw myself with my mom, painting. I saw myself with Jonathan, building Castle Byers. But do you know what was the first thing I saw?”
“What did you see?” Mike asked, dazed.
“Myself. I saw myself. On a set of swings.” Mike smiled through fresh tears, remembering. Will continued, his voice soft but broken. “And… I saw a black haired boy walking toward me. He sat next to me. And he asked… he asked if I wanted to be his friend.”
“It’s still the best thing I’ve ever done.” Mike whispered.
“And saying yes… It’s the best I’ve ever done, Mike.”
“Does this mean…?”
“You’re everything I know, Mike. You’ve always been there. I love you, too. You’re not just my Tammy. You’re not just a crush. You’re the love of my life, Michael Wheeler. And even if I wanted to, I could never, ever forget about you. No one could ever make me feel the way you do. And I don’t want anyone else. I want you.”
“Oh my god.” Mike breathed, pressing his forehead to Will’s. Both of them closed their eyes, laughing through their tears. “I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I never want to lose you ever again… The day they pulled your… body from the water.. I felt like my life stopped. I felt numb. I lost myself when I lost you. Each time you’re gone, I forget who I am. You bring out the best in me. The real me.”
“You’re gonna make me start bawling again, stop.” Will giggled wetly. “God, I love you…”
Mike cradled Will’s face with both his hands, gazing into his eyes, admiring the boy in front of him, the strongest person he knew. The boy who’d survived his abusive father for years. Who’d endured the cruel words tossed at him since he was just a little kid. Who’d spent years being haunted and tortured by an interdimensional monster that stole his innocence and his childhood. The boy who was willing to sacrifice himself to save everyone. Who’d hidden his feelings and his true self for years out of fear. Who learned to accept himself and saved the whole world. The boy he was deeply, madly in love with.
“I’m in love with you, William Byers. My sorcerer.”
Will laughed again. “Will you ever stop calling me that?” “
Maybe. I’m cursed, I need a cure.”
“Oh yeah? What kind of cure?”
“A true love’s kiss.”
Pushed around and kicked around, always a lonely boy
You were the one they’d talk about
Around town, as they put you down
And as hard as they would try, they’d hurt to make you cry
But you never cried to them, just to your soul
Run away, turn away
Mike felt Will inch closer, closing his eyes, but still slightly unsure. And he thinks. He wanted to stop being a coward. He wanted to follow his heart. So he did. He closed the gap between himself and the boy he’d spent years yearning for. His best friend. His love. His everything.
He kissed Will.
The moment he felt Will’s soft lips against his, he melted. Everything disappeared. Every negative thought, every shred of guilt and worry, vanished. He let himself feel. He let himself love. He deepened the kiss, one hand sliding to Will’s waist as if it belonged there, the other cradling his face, thumb stroking his cheek with a tenderness that made Will sigh into his mouth. Will grabs Mike’s hair by the back of his head and lets his hand rest over his shoulder, close to his neck.
Will kissed him straight back, gentle with the motion but with enough firmness to slide in his tongue and – Jesus, was this actually Will’s first kiss? After a minute, they broke apart for air, and Will can’t help the huge grin decorating his face as he smiles up at Mike. Mike whose breath is so heavy, his chest rising and falling in a way that Will can’t quite pull his eyes away from. And Mike.. Mike was utterly lost.
Will had always been beautiful, that was undeniable, but like this, he was something else. His hair looks- was– soft, cheeks flushed, eyes slightly glassed over. “Holy shit.” He breathed.
“I think you definitely cured me… Sorcerer.”
He teased, his own grin widening.
Will rolled his eyes, a little giggle escaping. Mike could have died happy right then.
“I’m so lame, I know.”
“I didn’t say it.”
Mike’s smile was genuine.
“You didn’t have to.”
I never meant to cause you any sorrow
I never meant to cause you any pain
I only wanted one time to see you laughing
I only want to see you
Laughing in the purple rain
Purple rain, purple rain
He leaned in again, slower this time, their lips meeting in a quiet, tender kiss, as if Will was something precious, delicate. They found an easy rhythm, a familiar push and pull, Will humming contentedly every few seconds.
And Mike finally, finally felt like something in his life was going right.
The lights flickered.