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“For the next point of order,” Yue Qingyuan announced, smoothly cutting off the inciting squabble between Wei Qingwei and Qi Qingqi, “this zhangmen has received several missives from Huan Hua Palace over the course of the last few weeks and thought it wise to bring them to everyone’s attention, in case anyone else receives similar… requests.”
A collective groan went through the room. “You too, Zhangmen-shixiong? Those Huan Hua dogs really know no shame,” Qi Qingqi quipped, leaning back in her chair. Despite her not having needed sleep for decades now, she suddenly looked exhausted. “They have been hounding me for the arrays Xian Shu stitches into our Spring Festival performance robes—the ones that imitate their fluttering in the wind—for at least two months now! What, do they expect I will just give away our peak’s secrets just like that?”
Liu Qingge huffed, glaring at Yue Qingyuan as he crossed his arms before his chest, a distinctly annoyed air around him. “They asked for the Bai Zhan forms too.”
There was a beat of silence. “The very secret Bai Zhan forms?” Shang Qinghua blurted out, sounding as baffled as all of them felt.
“Qian Cao recently received requests asking for instruction on how to create antidotes for several very rare afflictions, as well as some of the more uncommon ingredients,” Mu Qingfang spoke up hesitantly. “This healer didn’t think anything of it at the time, but with every peak being pestered like this, those requests do stand out in hindsight.”
Amidst the growing unrest, Shen Qingqiu calmly picked up his cup of tea and took a sip, looking to everyone in the room like his martial siblings’ problems could not have bothered him any less.
“What about Shen-shidi?” Yue Qingyuan cut off Lan Qingming’s complaints about the presumptuous request for a dozen barrels of Zui Xian's incredibly rare spiritual pear wine his peak had received—the very wine so difficult and time consuming to produce that Zui Xian was only able to make about two dozen barrels a year in total. Turning towards Shen Qingqiu, Yue Qingyuan watched his favourite shidi watch his martial siblings rile each other up with their outrage over the number and content of the infuriating requests both they themselves and each other had received. “Has shidi received any such requests from Huan Hua as well?”
Setting down the cup, Shen Qingqiu turned his attention away from the Crystal Cake he had been eyeing and towards Yue Qingyuan, visibly displeased over the distraction. “They tried exactly once. This shidi took care of it, it is not worth mentioning.”
The room was suddenly so silent that a rain drop landing on the floor would have seemed as loud as thunder, the whisper of robes from the slightest movement like a roaring river. Every single peak lord’s attention was focused on Shen Qingqiu, who didn’t pay them any more mind than he would a Minor Honeycomb Dragonfly flying by. “How in the world have you managed that, Shen Qingqiu.” Qi Qingqi leaned forward in her chair, her gaze locked on her least favourite shixiong.
Shen Qingqiu met her eye, fully encompassing his aloof scholar persona to everyone who didn't know any better. “This one told them to stop bothering this master.” His voice was calm, but the malicious glint in his eyes betrayed the part of his explanation he was willfully leaving out.
“So did I! Dammit Shen-shixiong, stop being like that.”
“Shidi,” Yue Qingyuan interrupted Qi Qingqi calmly before she might do anything ill-advised like jump over the table and try to throttle Shen Shixiong who, by the looks of it, was just waiting for an excuse to use his poisoned needles on her. Even if he hadn’t switched to an even more fast-acting poison than last time, this would be such a hassle. “Asking on behalf of everyone present, will Shen-shidi, as Cang Qiong’s lead strategist, do this zhangmen the honour and support his martial siblings in dealing with this persistent insult of an assault on our sect?”
Consideringly, Shen Qingqiu let his gaze wander over everyone in the room, meeting several pairs of pleading or daring eyes, before he turned back to Yue Qingyuan, holding his gaze with narrowed eyes. “It will cost you. Every single one of you.”
Shoulders sagging the slightest bit in relief—Shen Qingqiu had agreed much faster than Yue Qingyuan had anticipated, something he maybe should have been more worried about than he was, but that was the least of his problems at the moment—Yue Qingyuan gave him a single nod of acknowledgement. “Whatever shidi wants.”
He did not acknowledge the self-satisfied look on Shen Qingqiu’s face, so full of that familiar anticipatory glee. With this taken care of, he steered the meeting towards the next point of order.
***
Shen Qingqiu had prepared a stack’s worth of paper, his favourite brush, and an unused ink stick. He had freed his schedule today specifically for this, brewed his special Xinyang Maojian Tea and got out the Osmanthus Cake he had been saving for a special occasion. The next several shichen were for fun.
Beside the as of yet unused paper laid a note with all the things Huan Hua had requested from his martial siblings. From the special arrays Xian Shu had developed for their performance robes, over Wan Jian Peak’s characteristic blacksmithing techniques and the source of their strongest materials, even the requested list of merchants Cang Qiong had friendly relations with from An Ding Peak, disguised as simply asking for advice.
And, most infuriatingly of all, the request Huan Hua had sent to Qiong Ding Peak, demanding reparations for a group of Cang Qiong’s disciples supposedly stealing several kills from Huan Hua as they were nighthunting near Huan Hua territory. How dare!
Shen Qingqiu seethed even just thinking about it. He would make them regret not only trying to steal his sect’s secrets, but trying to do so this lazily. Surely they had asked for what was about to hit them.
Taking a sip from his tea, Shen Qingqiu began writing.
Hao Chen, he began the letter, not even bothering with any pleasantries.
Cang Qiong has recently received Hao Chen’s request for the roots of the Golden Willow Dandelion. This Shen Qingqiu writes on behalf of his shidi, Mu Qingfang, as his Qian Cao Peak is in desperate need of some Sticky Vine Blossoms. This one is sure our sects could reach a mutually beneficial agreement that will be satisfactory to both parties, as surely Huan Hua would not demand such favour without offering adequate recompense in kind.
Heh, good luck with that one, assholes. Shen Qingqiu would be very surprised indeed if any of them got past the Sinister Striped Tiger Drake. Putting the letter aside to let the ink dry, he took another sip of his tea, emptying the cup. He refilled it before picking up another sheet of paper and moving on to the next request on the list that needed his attention.
Lai Xiaoli,
this Shen Qingqiu writes to inform our close allies at Huan Hua Palace that a group of our disciples ran into a Bronze Antlered Daybreak Takin that escaped into Huan Hua territory. Of course, this Shen Qingqiu immediately thought to give Huan Hua warning to be careful around their borders and take care of the beast before it may become a problem.
Shen Qingqiu wondered how long it would take them to figure out he was sending them on a wild goose chase. Weeks probably, right? If that singular request asking about anything he might know about the Unicat he had received was anything to go by—clearly fishing for a copy of one of Qing Jing’s compiled bestiaries. Ha! A Unicat of all things, one of the most well-documented beasts of this realm. The sheer laziness of the request was an insult Shen Qingqiu simply couldn’t ignore.
He sipped on his tea before turning to the next letter. And the next. And the next.
Several shichen later, dozens of missives were ready to be sent out over the course of the next days, weeks even if he spread them out a little. Some more scathing than others, some utter bullshit that sounded just eloquent enough to trick idiots into thinking it wasn’t. To add insult to injury, Shen Qingqiu added a handful of standard talismans to some of his reply to the most blatantly daring of the requests. You dare ask An Ding for their specially tailored featherlight talismans? Well, Shen Qingqiu very much doubted those Huan Hua fools would even notice this one didn’t have any of the additions Shang Qinghua had added to the ones Cang Qiong used, so he was sure they wouldn’t dare bother Cang Qiong again once they did figure it out.
Leaning back, Shen Qingqiu picked up the tanghulu he had been saving for last from the far corner of the table and bit into it, enjoying the sugary crust mixing with the tartness of the hawthorn as he let his gaze slide over the stacks of messages lining his table. It tasted even sweeter now, with the knowledge of a task thoroughly taken care of.
On the outside, Shen Qingqiu was the image of a perfect scholar taking a break from his hard work. On the inside, he was cackling in anticipation of how exactly his counterattack on Huan Hua might be received. Maybe those Huan Hua idiots would be puzzling over his words, too intimidated to ask for clarification. Or, even better, ask and give Shen Qingqiu an opening to decimate them even more thoroughly.
He hoped someone would cry. Shen Qingqiu would count it a success if word got back to him that someone broke out in tears.
Served those Huan Hua wannabes right. If any of them dared attack Cang Qiong again after he was done with them, he would obliterate them until they begged to be allowed to do him favours. This was Shen Qingqiu's world and if he felt merciful, he might allow them to live in it.
***
“For the next point of order,” Yue Qingyuan announced at the next peak lord meeting, “this zhangmen would like to share that he has received a missive from Huan Hua’s Old Palace Master apologizing for the trouble his sect has given us and not a single one more.” He looked around the room, meeting everyone’s eye. “This one wanted to make sure none of his shidi and shimei had any more trouble either?”
A collective shaking of heads confirmed that yes, none of them had, in fact, received any more absurd requests.
To Yue Qingyuan’s right, Shen Qingqiu was sipping on a cup of fragrant tea and savoring the selection of snacks Yue Qingyuan had provided for him, consisting of all his favourites. He was not even trying to hide his smug expression. In a way, Shen Qingqiu was almost disappointed this verbal exchange of blows was already over this quickly; he didn’t even get to send the last third of the letters he had prepared!
Maybe he should send them out anyway. Huan Hua had started this was, after all. Surely they had asked for it.
“Shen Qingqiu, you bastard. You really did it.” In her eagerness for answer, Qi Qingqi leaned closer, her chair squeaking lightly beneath her. “How in the world did you get them to stop?”
Setting the cup down, Shen Qingqiu took up his fan instead and snapped it open, hiding the lower half of his face behind it. “That is for this shixiong to know and for shimei to never figure out, if she knows what's good for herself.”
Qi Qingqi rolled her eyes, but didn’t argue. She knew better than to question his allegiances and accepted the boundary he put down with the usual grace she liked to exhibit.
After all, Shen Qingqiu might be a bastard, but he was Cang Qiong’s bastard, and none of them would forget that.