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Nancy gets a far off look in her eyes, a smile playing across her lips. “Barb was just so… Barb, unapologetically. She was never afraid to be herself, never worried about fitting in or being popular. She didn’t care if anyone talked about her high-waisted mom jeans, or her tomboy haircut. She wouldn’t do anything stupid like shotgun a beer just to impress her boyfriend and his asshole friends.” She rolls her eyes at herself. “She was one of the bravest people I’ve ever known. I just think about what I’ve done– what I was doing while she was being killed by some, some creature, and I know that no matter how hard I try– I’ll never make up for it. I’ll never be as brave as she was.”
Robin puts her hand on Nancy’s shoulder, and Nancy turns to look at her with a startled expression. “I’m sorry about Barb,” Robin starts, fumbling for the words. “I didn’t know her all that well, but– I knew of her, I saw you guys in the hallways and stuff, she was– like you said, just smart and cool in her own way. Way out of my league. Um,” She laughs nervously at the slip, and talks faster to cover it up: “But I think you’re pretty brave. I don’t know if Steve ever told you, but I used to think you were just one of those stuck-up girls like Carolyn or Tammy. But I used to think the same thing about Steve, everyone did, until something weird happened with you two and Jonathan Byers of all people, and you were suddenly… different. You had this huge don’t-mess-with-me vibe, I guess now I know it’s because of all this stuff with the upside down.” She rubs the back of her neck. Nancy watches her talk patiently, happy just to hear the sound of her voice and have her company. “Uh, anyways, I think that you’re about to go try to blast an interdimensional, telekinetic monster-man with a shotgun. I’d say that’s pretty brave.”
“You get used to it,” Nancy shrugs. She looks down at the shotgun in her lap and wraps her hand around it. “You have to defend yourself somehow, right? And the people you care about. That’s probably the bravest thing I can do. …What about you?”
“What?” Robin asks.
“What’s the bravest thing you can think of?”
“For me?” she clarifies. Nancy nods, and Robin gives the matter serious contemplation. The scariest thing she could ever do… Her face grew pale and serious. She glanced at Nancy from the corner of her eye. “It’s, um… If I tell you, do you promise to never tell anyone else?” Taken aback, Nancy nods. Robin takes a breath. “Okay. I think that kissing a girl is the bravest thing I could ever do.”
Nancy’s eyebrows raise in surprise. “That– that would be, …brave.” The thought terrifies Nancy, it’s a thought she’s had before, but all she can think about is the expression of horror or disgust that would appear on her mother’s face if she ever found out. Her mother, her father, everyone at school, everyone they told about it. They would all look at her and just know. It’s similar to what she felt for those few hours in the morning between being with Steve at the party and learning that Barbara had gone missing that day after school. It had been so easy for Steve to not care about the staring. Nancy was usually the one to worry about things. And then she shot apart a creature called a Mind Flayer, and not even the assholes running the school paper could scare her anymore. Maybe she was brave.
She looks over at Robin, who has gone quiet. Her hands fidget with the laces of her boots, where her leg is drawn up to her chest. She’s pointedly not looking at Nancy, and Nancy realizes she’s waiting for her verdict. “Are you- do you- Is kissing girls something you want to do?” she asks.
Robin nods her head without looking up from her shoe. “You can’t tell anyone. Nobody knows but Steve.”
“Steve knows?”
“Yeah. He’s… he’s a good guy. He gets it.”
Nancy nods her head in satisfaction. “That’s why you two aren’t dating, isn’t it?” Robin laughs. “No seriously, I’ve been wondering. Steve kept saying there was a reason you weren’t interested, but he wouldn’t tell me what it was. I knew it had to be something big, because he’s usually pretty horrible at being platonic.”
“Ugh, tell me about it,” Robin rolls her eyes. “He’s been sort of insufferable around you, no offense. If Jonathan were out of the picture I”m sure he would have made a move by now. It’s actually disgusting to watch.”
Nancy blushes.”He’s a good guy, like you said. I still… I still have feelings for him, just… not necessarily romantic ones. We’re kind of moving in different directions, and… Well, I’m glad you two are friends.”
“Me too. Even if it means I keep getting roped into this bullshit,” Robin gestures to the battle preparations around them. Nancy sobers, her face drooping. The atmosphere is tense when they stop to think about it, and they all know that it’ll all come to a head soon. Nancy studies everyone’s faces, etching them into her mind so that they won’t ever fade, even if the worst happens. She reaches Robin’s face last, and meets her sky-blue eyes, surrounded by soft freckles and wavy auburn hair.
Nancy feels brave. “Hey, Robin?”
“Hmm?”
“Close your eyes.”
Robin huffs a laugh. “Okay?” she smiles, closing her eyes. Nancy leans in and delicately presses her lips against Robin’s, holding them there for a second, long enough to register her soft warmth. Then Nancy leans back to find Robin staring at her, wide-eyed, frozen in shock.
She has a moment of doubt and quickly asks, “Was– was that okay?”
Robin puts her fingers to her lips and starts to smile. “Nancy Wheeler! Who ever would have thought!”
“It was a kiss for good luck,” Nancy blushes.
Her eyes flashing, Robin says, “Then Vecna doesn’t stand a fucking chance!”