Work Text:
Part 1: Dick should review before posting
@RealDGrayson just posted a TikTok!
[Video Desc.: A shirtless Dick Grayson stands in front of the camera, flexing his arms clearly post-workout. Behind him, barely in frame, is a man in a red t-shirt doing chin-ups. His back is to the camera, but he’s clearly muscular, someone who must work out a lot. Dick does not seem to notice he’s there, or at the very least does not acknowledge it.]
Caption: Just for you ;)
Comments:
@noyouhaveacrush
> i have been blessed upon this day
@WesternWallace
> aww thanks man i appreciate it
@lizardsrcool
> HELLO??? who’s the guy in the back fighting for his life i must know TT
@RealDGrayson
>> Replying to @lizardsrcool: It’s just my brother don’t worry about him, he’s doing fine
@TimDrakeOfficial
> Gross
@yeeouch
>> Replying to @TimDrakeOfficial: agreed
@daylightgivings
>> Replying to @TimDrakeOfficial: agreed
•••
Official Wayne Family Tracker | @WayneTracker just made a tweet!
Official Wayne Family Tracker | @WayneTracker
> there’s another brother??? sorry guys i guess i’ve been failing at my job
Cass(andra) Wayne | @CassNotCassie
>> ? I do not know of anyone new. 5 brothers, like always.
•••
Bruce Wayne | @TheBruceWayne just made a tweet!
Bruce Wayne | @TheBruceWayne
> What is #SecretWayne ? I have not adopted any more children, nor have any been kept secret.
•••
Richard Grayson | @RealDGrayson just made a tweet!
Richard Grayson | @RealDGrayson
> Okay, okay! I think I need to clear something up. When I said that the guy in the background of my most recent TikTok (follow me there btw same @) was my brother, I meant biological. He’s not a Wayne, and he’s not interested in being a public figure, so please respect his privacy. Thanks <3
the cooler RH | @rharchery
>> so, is he single? asking for a friend
Official Wayne Family Tracker | @WayneTracker
>> oh thank goodness, i don’t have to deactivate and go into hiding
Richard Grayson | @RealDGrayson
>>> Don’t sweat it!
Batman is Hot | @batmanishotagenda
>> can we get a name? sorry if that’s invasive, just curious
Richard Grayson | @RealDGrayson
>>> Jacob!
•••
Messages
—> Cass!! (1 unread message)
Stephanie 👎 (1 unread message)
Cass!!
Richard
Brother #1
It’s fine, I got it under control!
Cass!!
Of course
Brother #1
In my defense, I didn’t realize he was in the video when I filmed it
•••
Messages
—> Stephanie 👎 (1 unread message)
Stephanie 👎
HAH
Dick :(
Shut uuuupppp
Stephanie 👎
never this is hilarious, you made Bruce log into twitter
you’re lucky you and “Jacob” look so alike
Dick :(
I’m sure people will forget about it in like a week
•••
Part 2: Damian’s lucky he has a private account
@dogsoverpeople 🔒 just posted a TikTok!
[Video Desc.: Damian is sitting at his desk in front of the camera, looking as serious as ever. “These are my drawings of Titus,” he says quietly as he holds up his sketch book to show off the various inked and penciled drawings, pointing to each one and elaborating on the artistic choices he made. After a moment, his bedroom door swings open behind him.
“Did you finish the book?” says a voice from out of frame, in Arabic.
“I did, it’s on the shelf next to the one I borrowed from Richard,” comes Damian’s reply. He continues showing off his other sketches from the week, continuing to explain them as he ignores the tall man who walks into frame behind him. He’s only in frame from his shoulders to his waist, his loose red hoodie, the waistband of his jeans, and the faint scars on his hands are the only notable things about him.]
Comments:
@loljkjk 🔒
> these are awesome, Dami!!
@dogsoverpeople
>> Replying to @loljkjk: Thank you, Jon. I look forward to seeing you this weekend. :)
@GAstolemysole
> Damian, WHO is that
@dogsoverpeople 🔒
>> Replying to @GAstolemysole: To whom are you referring?
@GAstolemysole
>>> Replying to @dogsoverpeople 🔒: the guy you were talking to?? i’ve never seen him before
@dogsoverpeople 🔒
>>>> Replying to @GAstolemysole: Oh, him. That is my younger brother, he was home for the weekend.
@GAstolemysole
>>>>> Replying to @dogsoverpeople 🔒: YOUNGER???
•••
Part 3: Tim is just as bad
@TimDrakeOfficial just added to his Instagram story!
[Video Desc.: Tim is standing in the middle of the frame, hunched over the kitchen island as he points an accusatory finger at the camera. He appears to be mid rant as the recording picks up where his last story left off.
“—and that’s not even the half of it! You can’t parade yourself online as some kind of expert on the Star Wars franchise if you don’t understand something as simple as—“ he continues on, even as someone else enters the frame in the background and slips a black apron over his red hoodie.
The newcomer seems to ignore Tim, with his back facing the camera anyway as he appears to be cooking something on the stove. His slightly unkempt, dark curls are the only feature of his visible to the camera. Tim’s rant remains undeterred, and continues for many installments.]
•••
@TimDrakeOfficial Messages
—> @sunshineluver (1 unread message)
@sunshineluver
lolol did you not notice Jason was in the background the entire time
@TimDrakeOfficial
are you serious
@sunshineluver
deadly
@TimDrakeOfficial
and after we just got done making fun of Dick for accidentally posting him TT
what am i supposed to do?? those stories already have thousands of views and it’s not like i can claim he’s MY secret biological brother, it would be too easy to look that up
@sunshineluver
idk man this is a problem very specific to you
@TimDrakeOfficial
ugh you’re no help
@sunshineluver
awww love you too
•••
@TimDrakeOfficial just added to his Instagram story!
[Image Desc. 1: A simple, vertical black rectangle with white text that reads “Sorry for the confusion yesterday, guys. You guessed it, that’s our cook! Please stop asking me if he’s single, thank you.”]
[Image Desc. 2: A second slide with the same layout, this time reading “No, he doesn’t have an Instagram, or Twitter, or TikTok, or Facebook, or MySpace or whatever. He’s a very offline guy, be more like him.]
•••
Part 4: Stephanie just doesn’t care
@yeeouch just posted a TikTok!
[Video Desc.: Stephanie is sitting at a desk in front of the camera, carefully applying her makeup as she talks. “Unfortunately, most of the questions I received from you guys were about my girlfriend, which I will not be answering because I respect her privacy and also I am a person outside of our relationship, believe it or not. Anyway, this is an all purple palette from—“
She cuts herself off abruptly, pausing with the eyeshadow palette still presented to the camera as someone else walks into the room. He’s slightly too tall to fit in frame, but the embroidered Wonder Woman logo on his red sweatshirt is on full display.
“What on Earth are you doing?” he asks, less judgmental than seemingly genuinely confused.
“A get ready with me. I answer questions while I do my makeup, and—“
“You look like shit.”
“I’m not done yet, Jason. Besides, it’s not like all of us can take a three year long beauty rest and come back with flawless skin.”
The man, presumably Jason, lets out a soft huff of laughter before leaving again.
Stephanie turns back to the camera and continues as if nothing had happened.]
Caption: GRWM except i was RUDELY interrupted >:(
Comments:
@CassNotCassie
> is he bothering you, queen
@yeeouch
>> Replying to @CassNotCassie: so much, you’d think i broke into his apartment because it has much better lighting than my dorm or something
@daylightgivings
> he can be so rude sometimes
@yeeouch
>> Replying to @daylightgivings: i can always count on you, Duke
@lizardsrcool
> omg purple is definitely your color
•••
Messages
—> Dick :( (1 unread message)
Dick :(
Oh, so when I do it…
Stephanie 👎
oh come on it’s not like anyone has any reason to connect me of all people to Jason Todd
Dick :(
You literally said his name!
Stephanie 👎
there are so many Jason’s in the world, probably too many
anyway notice how no one is asking about him in my comments, you and Tim are just rookies
Dick :(
We’re literally the only ones with PR training
Stephanie 👎
and you still thought it was a good idea to say that Jason was your secret biological brother named “Jacob”? wow…
•••
@yeeouch just made a post on Instagram!
[Image Desc.: Stephanie is centered in the frame, giving a piece sign to the camera and smiling wide. Her blonde waves are pulled into two french braids on either side of her head, and her makeup is still done from her video earlier. She’s wearing light purple, glittery eyeshadow with a simple winged eyeliner, and a neutral pink lipgloss, which goes well with her lavender tank top, coincidentally leaving her muscles on full display.
Half in frame on the right side of the photo is the man from her earlier video, still in the same Wonder Woman sweatshirt, holding a copy of what appears to be Jane Austen’s Persuasion in front of his face to maintain anonymity as he walks past.]
Caption: thank you so much @GothamBeautyBrand & @SpoilerAlert for the Spoiler-inspired palette!! you’re really doing the heavy lifting for purple girlies like me
Comments:
@SpoilerAlert
> purple really is the best
@yeeouch
>> Replying to @SpoilerAlert: so true
@sunshineluver
> girl why are you still in his apartment
@yeeouch
>> Replying to @sunshineluver: the lighting, Conner, the lighting
@CassNotCassie
> you are so beautiful <3
@yeeouch
>> Replying to @CassNotCassie: awww thanks babe
•••
Part 5: Cass unleashes Hell
@CassNotCassie just made a post on Instagram!
[Image Desc.: A mirror selfie taken at a recent Wayne Charity event. Cass is on the left, holding her phone. Her hair is slicked back and she’s dressed in a black pantsuit that was clearly tailored specifically for her, the white dress shirt she wears underneath unbuttoned down to just beneath her clavicle.
On the right is a man who looks to be nearly a full foot taller than her, similarly dressed though his shirt is a deep red rather than a crisp white. His hair is also slicked back, though a few distinct curls seem to have escaped and rest loosely on his forehead, accentuating the white stripe slightly left of center in stark contrast to the rest of his dark hair. He has been tagged in the post as @JTlovesreading.]
Caption: Twins
Comments:
Comments have been limited.
@yeeouch
> hubba hubba
@WayneTracker
> ummmm…
@boldlygoingsomewhere
> why is that guy tagged as Jason Todd hello??
@spookymulder
>> Replying to @boldlygoingsomewhere: no that’s exactly what i was thinking god i hope it’s a typo
@ghostsofgotham
> a little weird to tag someone who’s very much alive as your dead brother’s inactive account…
•••
Gotham Gazette | @GGazetteNews just made a tweet!
Gotham Gazette | @GGazetteNews
> Cassandra Wayne appears to have tagged the late Jason Todd-Wayne’s former Instagram account in her newest post. Her followers are both confused and offended as she has yet to speak out on the matter. To learn more you can read the full article on our website here.
•••
Messages
—> The Kids Table (No Bruces Allowed) (19 unread messages)
Brother #1
Cass whhyyyyyy
Cass!!
I asked permission first
Barbara :)
This is beyond even me at this point, you guys are just going to have to deal with this one.
Brother #5
I love how I’m not involved in this at all, you guys have fun though
Brother #2
She did ask for permission, I’m sure B will come up with something that makes sense
•••
Bruce Wayne | @TheBruceWayne just made a tweet!
Bruce Wayne | @TheBruceWayne
> [Image Desc.: An official Wayne Enterprises press docket, the body of which reads “It has come to my attention that my daughter Cassandra has recently come under controversy for tagging an Instagram account that formerly belonged to my son, Jason Todd-Wayne. As you all are well aware, 8 years ago Jason tragically passed away due to uncertain circumstances after a 48-hour period in which he had gone missing. A private funeral was held, and a body was buried.
What you may not know, as I did not myself for quite a while, is that Jason, miraculously, managed to survive. The body we buried is now believed to be a fake, a decoy that someone had fabricated presumably to ease our pain. We still do not know what Jason experienced that night or in the following 4 years before he made his return to Gotham. Since he has returned, Jason has expressed a desire to keep information regarding what happened to him private and to remain out of the public eye. We as a family have tried our best to respect these wishes as we navigate this unprecedented situation.
The Wayne Charity gala hosted three days ago, which was where the photo in question was taken, served partially as a way for Jason to test the waters of being a public figure after we were finally able to have him declared legally alive once more. The official announcement was meant to happen this Friday in a more formal press release, which as of now will still be going through. I ask, not as Bruce Wayne the CEO, but as Bruce Wayne the father, that you remain patient and understanding as my family navigates these unusual circumstances.”]
•••
@JTlovesreading just made a post on Instagram!
[Image Desc.: Jason stands in the center of the frame, visible from the waist up wearing his now signature red t-shirt. He is holding a book out in front of his face, a clearly very well-loved and heavily annotated copy of Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein.]
Caption: Steph told me I should post, she said this was fine. I made this account when I was fifteen because I didn’t think anyone would see it, and now thousands of people have seen my review of Pride and Prejudice from almost ten years ago… A lot has changed since then, but I still read a lot. Maybe I’ll post about it, maybe I won’t.
Comments:
@yeeouch
> he will post more guys dw
@JTlovesreading
>> Replying to @yeeouch: I said I wasn’t making any promises
@yeeouch
>>> Replying to @JTlovesreading: it’s okay i made them for you
@daylightgivings
> can you help me with my english paper PLEASE 🙏
@JTlovesreading
>> Replying to @daylightgivings: You’re literally sitting on my couch right now why didn’t you just ask me out loud
@rharchery
> hot
@JTlovesreading
>> Replying to @rharchery: Blocked
@rharchery
>>> Replying to @JTlovesreading: wait nonono
@librarianofdelphi
> Of course you’d choose Frankenstein
@JTlovesreading
> Replying to @librarianofdelphi: I like what I like, Babs, leave me alone