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Lucy trudged into the guild half awake, plopping down on the bar and making vague gestures towards Mirajane that hopefully communicated that she wanted a strawberry milkshake.
She had another nightmare.
Again.
For the third night in a row.
While Lucy wasn't exactly a stranger to nightmares, they've unfortunately become a very predictable part of her life, but they absolutely can't keep being every night. It was absolutely destroying her mentally.
What did a girl have to do to get a good night's sleep around here?
Lucy paused, blearily staring up at the ceiling. There had to be a magic item for good dreams or something. There's no way someone hasn't made some kind of incense, or tea, or literally anything.
Rent be dammed, Lucy was buying something to fix this. She needed the peace of mind.
She'd make the money back eventually, and she'd do worse at jobs without sleep anyway.
If she needed to make sad eyes at Natsu about potentially losing her apartment and moving in with Erza to force him to keep the property damage to a minimum, that was simply using every tool she had to her advantage.
A beautiful glass of strawberry goodness in front of the poor celestial spirit mage, and Lucy made the terrible mistake of looking up at her savior.
Mirajane's expression was one Lucy had very quickly learned to identify when she joined Fairy Tail.
The amused look of a She-Devil who was about to get entertainment at someone's expense.
The look itself was often the only warning sign before something happened.
Lucy stares at her strawberry salvation apprehensively. Tapping the glass, turning it around to inspect it for weird colors—before giving up and drinking it.
If someone was Mirajane's target they wouldn't know until it was too late anyway, so her drink was probably fine. She wants her milkshake too much to resist the allure any longer.
The sweet delicious taste of strawberries and happiness graced her tastebuds and not only was her morning was significantly more manageable, but she firmly in the clear for whatever Mirajane's look was for.
Lucy chanced another look at the She-Devil.
No change.
That did not bode well.
"I might regret asking this," Lucy started, blearily squinting up at Mirajane. "But why are you smiling like that?"
Mirajane's face lit up with pure excitement, which only set off more alarm bells in Lucy's head.
"We won the Grand Magic Games, right?" Mirajane asked, a coy expression on her face. "That means we're gonna get a lot of mages trying to join our guild!"
That—that was an entirely normal reason to be excited.
Which was worse, somehow.
Lucy watched the She-Devil warily until Mirajane's face dropped into a far realer, sly grin. "Everyone is gonna be in rare form for at least the next month to fuck with the newbies." Mirajane leaned towards Lucy, smile widening. "It's gonna be great."
"What?" Lucy asked, definitely regretting going down this road in the first place.
Mirajane's expression switched back to false innocence. "It's just a little something that Fairy Tail has done since the first master created the guild!" She said cheerily, clapping her hands to punctuate the sentence. "We give each prospective member the full Fairy Tail experience before they join so they know what they're getting into!"
Lucy stared.
Mirajane smiled.
"So like hazing?" Lucy asked incredulously.
"Yep!" Mirajane replied gleefully.
Lucy sighed. "I can't believe you guys." Except she could, very easily even.
Mirajane laughed at Lucy's disappointment before two arms pulled Lucy into a hug from behind.
"Don't be such a boooore Lucy," Cana said, from where her head was now planted on Lucy's shoulder. "It's just a little fun! Anyone who can't handle it wouldn't last long here anyway."
Which was fair, but still. "There's no need to antagonize the new people on their first day." She maintained.
"It's not antagonizing them on their first day~" Cana replied, rocking back and forth into her hug. "We stop once they join. If they still wanna join after they see a full bar brawl, then we know they'll fit in! Totally different."
Lucy twisted her head to glare at Cana.
"It's like an asshole deterrent," Cana explained, waving one of her arms. "As the strongest guild in Fiore, we get a lot of self-serious dickweeds coming in on their stronger-than-thou bullshit, wanting to be top dog." Cana flashed Lucy a sharp grin. "We send every last one of them packing."
That made a frankly absurd amount of sense. Lucy had to concede to that point, but "What about the nice ones?"
If they had done any dumbshit to scare Wendy when she first joined—strength be damned, Lucy would have found a way to make them regret it.
Gemini always had some lovely ideas.
"We're practically doing them a service!" Cana said, throwing her arms out. "Can you imagine what would happen if some bright-eyed baby-mage came in here on a slow day and didn't even know what they were actually signing up for? The poor fool might not even be ready to dodge the tables!" Cana said dramatically, poking Lucy's face with her finger. "The tables, Lucy."
Lucy smacked Cana's hand away from her face. "Seeing you idiots doesn't prepare you at all to dodge anything! I barely made it through my first week by hiding close to the bar!"
Cana exaggeratedly rolled her eyes, clearly mocking Lucy's struggles.
Lucy pinched the other girl's waist in retaliation.
Cana flicked her forehead.
"Wait," Lucy said, sleep-addled mind slowly putting the pieces together. "You guys did that to me, too!"
Cana openly laughed at her, while Mirajane giggled.
Lucy used both of her elbows to shove Cana off her back.
This only made the woman laugh harder.
"Obviously," Cana replied, still laughing. "I mean, Elfman knocking you to the ground when you weren't a part of the fight, Natsu stealing Gray's boxers—hell! You're on a team with Gray. Has he ever asked for someone's underwear?"
Lucy sputtered. "Is that why he asked for my underwear? I thought he was a massive creep until Erza dragged us on a mission, what the fuck!" She meets a guy, and he immediately asks to wear her panties. It was beyond bizarre and off-putting, and the only thing she regrets about hitting him over with a table leg is that she only did it once. He absolutely deserved that for being a dumbass, doubly so now that she knows it was on purpose!
And Natsu—that bastard constantly complained about seeing Gray naked, and then he goes and takes Gray's underwear on purpose just to harass her?!
Lucy sharply turned her head to where Natsu and Gray were arguing with each other and attempted to glare a hole through the back of their heads. An action that went entirely unnoticed by either of them.
"I am going to get them for that," Lucy stated simply.
Mirajane smiled sweetly, and Cana cackled.
"If you need help planning, I'm always here~!" Mirajane said with a wink, walking away.
"Make sure you do it while I'm at the guild!" Cana added, patting Lucy's back, before following Mirajane.
Alone, Lucy began to meticulously plan out her revenge.
Revenge for having to see Gray's goddman dick on her first day, revenge for Gray having the audacity to ask her for her underwear as their first meeting, and revenge for Natsu having set the whole damn thing up.
Lucy takes another sip of delectable strawberry.
Revenge that would happen after she finished her milkshake.
--
"Observe! The Fairy Tail building is within reach!" Rembrandt announced, pointing at the tip of a building that Wynonna could barely see, before grabbing her arm and racing towards the guild.
It was a little surreal. Going from watching the Grand Magic Games to actually being close to hopefully becoming a member, but Rembrandt never did half measures.
The two of them had barely managed to get a cramped hotel with only one bed, didn't manage to get a single seat in the stadium, and had to stand outside in the hot sun to watch the giant lacrima screens showing the games—all in service of getting a chance to study high-level mages at their peak.
Or well, that's why Rembrandt was there. Wynonna had just been following Rembrandt.
While watching said lacrima screens, one thing became very clear. Multiple guilds were unfairly targeting Fairy Tail, even stooping so low as to cheat to try and win over them.
Rembrandt had been immediately furious, yelling curses at the screen from the moment they realized Raven Tail had only attacked Fairy Tail through the entire first event. Their rage reached new heights, as their yelling upgraded to screaming, when Flare of Raven Tail attempted to literally brand Lucy of Fairy Tail in front of an audience of thousands.
After seeing what was obviously a dark guild given free reign to harass at best, and attempt to torture at worst, Fairy Tail in front of both the audience and the referee, with everyone merely deciding it was Fairy Tail's fault for being weak... it was no suprise that when the two of them got back to their hotel room, Rembrandt was already planning how to get out of their lease and which things they were taking to Magnolia. Vowing that they were gonna be guild members before the end of the month.
Now, after a full week of running around, packing, breaking off obligations, selling all their furniture, and traveling, they were finally here.
In front of the building itself.
"We have arrived! Fairy Tail! The most debauchedly evil guild in all of Fiore!" Rembrandt excitedly announced.
"That's not what evil means," Wynonna replied absentmindedly. Hopefully, no one in Fairy Tail took Rembrandt's quirks as an insult.
All the reports described the guild members as frankly bizarre people, so Wynonna was holding out for it to be a non-issue.
If it wasn't, that would break Rembrandt's heart, and Wynonna would have to put arsenic in their water supply—and of course help Rembrandt with their own revenge.
"We shall meet Natsu! And Laxus! And Erza! And Gajeel! And Gray! And Lucy!" Rembrandt cheered, making a sweeping gesture with one of their arms, their half cape fluttering behind them. "I tremble in trepidation! Evil frauds could never prosper over the truly wicked!" Wynonna smiled. That was really high praise.
Not wasting any more time, Rembrandt threw the doors of the guild open as hard as they could, resulting in them slamming into the walls with a loud and resonant bang—not that anyone in the guild seemed to notice.
"Juvia will never forgive Natsu!" The woman in question yelled, pointing aggressively at the aforementioned dragon slayer, while literally boiling in rage. Wynonna watched, almost mesmerized, as parts of her body took on a watery consistency before snapping back to being solid. "Natsu stole Gray-sama's boxers—on love-rival's first day! You're the reason Lucy wants Gray-sama so much! If it wasn't for you, Juvia wouldn't have to fight love-rival for Gray-sama!" Her body whirled like a typhoon.
A boiling typhoon.
Wynonna stepped ever so slightly behind Rembrandt, happy that Juvia was on the left side of the building. Opposite of Wynonna.
"If it's a fight you want," Natsu said, wide smirk on his face. "I'm all—" A large bullet of water slammed into him, crashing through multiple tables, and sending several of their guild mates flying.
"Incredible..." Rembrandt stage whispered. "Juvia and Natsu.... he destroyed those Sabertooth assholes! And they both participated in unison raids! The evil splendor of teamwork!"
A pillar of flame burst through the water that had trapped Natsu, which retracted back into a physical Juvia, who then tried to smack him with a water whip.
"That's not what evil means," Wynonna replied mildly, not looking away from the two Fairy Tail members attempting to beat eachother unconscious.
At least Rem isn't bothered by the fighting.
Several of the other guild members who had been hit when Natsu and Juvia went through their tables were getting to their feet and throwing magic at the two at the center of the fight, which didn't always hit their intended target. Turning the one-on-one into a full-on guild brawl.
Most notable of these new combatants were a man yelling "Babies!" who was using dolls to shoot at Juvia that only hit when her body was solid, a woman with soft pink wings who was sending volleys of magic at Natsu and hitting the entire crowd around him, and a green haired man who had been at the same table as the other two, but instead of jumping up and joining the fight, was on the ground furiously scribbling with a light pen.
Despite not throwing any attacks, multiple other guild members physically jumped and ran away from him when they looked down at what he was doing. Wynonna decided that she didn't want to know.
More interesting to Wynonna was how each of them dressed. It was bizzarre to say the least, but considering Rembrandt was wearing black leather shorts with stockings attached through garter belts, a dark button up shirt with split long sleeves that turned into a half body cape in the back—Wynonna was dressed in a blouse with bishop sleeves, a long bow delicately tied around her neck, and a tube skirt with a small slit at the bottom. It was nice knowing the two of them wouldn't stick out next to... she wasn't quite sure how to describe the doll's man's outfit, but it was safe to say they didn't look that weird in comparison.
A loud crash and a man yelling in surprise rang out from the other side of the guild.
Wynonna and Rembrandt turned their attention to see Gray in the middle of a broken wall, likely after being thrown into it.
Looking around him revealed Lucy with her whip out, a ginger cat man dressed in a full suit, and a bipedal goat dressed in a butler's uniform... with a small fish's tail sticking out from under his coat.
Gray got to his feet and glared at the group. "Really bro!?"
"Aw, come on," The ginger man said, tail flicking back and forth. "You know when Lucy cooked up this little plan, I had to get in on it." Shit-eating grin clear in his voice, as the man dramatically put both hands to his heart. "There is no way I'd miss out on harassing my best bro."
"Fuck off man!" Gray put his fist to his palm. "Ice-Make—SHIT!" He yelped, frost being spit out aimlessly as he barely dodged a whip at his ankles, two volleys of light magic thrown at his face, and the goat man rushing him.
"Ice-Make:" Gray said, the moment he got an inch to breathe. "FLOOR!"
Wynonna watched entranced as almost everyone in the guild slipped and fell on their asses, catching Rembrandt's arm before they met the same fate. Spells missing their target worse than usual, people panic-casting as they fell. It was a complete and utter trainwreck.
The pink-winged woman and dolls man from before were openly cackling at everyone else's misfortune, especially the green-haired man's, from the air.
The ginger man had jumped onto a table the moment Gray had begun the word floor, and immediately went back to trying to deck his friend.
The rest of the guild wasn't far behind. Natsu had quickly recovered by setting himself on fire, melting the ice around him, and flipping back into the standing position. With Juvia taking an opposite approach of using the ice to her advantage by skating on it, faster than she had been running before.
Wynonna looked back at Rembrandt, who had managed to stabilize themself in their stilettos by stabbing them into the ice.
Rembrandt gave her a smile and thumbs up.
"Ice Make: LANCE!" Wynonna turned her head back to see several spears pointed at Lucy, and what were likely her spirits.
"Loke!" Lucy yelled, pointing up at the ice attacks, which he immediately moved to punch out of the air. She quickly moved her hand back down to point at the ice mage himself. "Capricorn!"
"Ice-Make: Slicing Dance!" And Capricorn's knee met an ice blade jutting out from Gray's elbows, before getting kneed in the stomach by Loke, and kicked by Capricorn directly into the ceiling.
Where he freezes both of his feet to a support beam. "Ice Make: ARROWS!"
"OH SHIT!" Lucy yelled—both of her spirits visibly panicked, breaking out into a sprint towards their mage—before pulling out a key. "FORCED GATE CLOSURE!" Capricorn disappeared, and Lucy jumped towards her final spirit.
A volley of arrows covered nearly the entire left side of the guild towards the bar, ice shards and frost covering the area in a thick fog, hundreds of magic spells went off at once in an attempt to protect themselves from the onslaught.
"WHAT THE FUCK GRAY!?" Shouted a very pissed off woman in a bikini top, ice shards littering her dark brown hair.
"Cana—the one of infinite strength!" Rembrandt said, clasping their hands together in awe.
"I WAS GETTING TRIPLE TEAMED!" Gray yelled back. "FUCK YOU—YOU TRY DEALING WITH THAT!"
Wynonna used this moment to look back at Lucy, who was kneeling on the floor, looking frazzled as she caught her breath, Loke gently brushing the ice off of her.
"YOU'RE ABOUT TO GET QUADRUPLE TEAMED, JACKASS!" Cana pulled out several cards from her purse before pointing them out towards a broken wine barrel. "LOOK AT WHAT YOU DID TO HER!"
"WE HAVE MORE!" Gray shouted.
"FUCK YOU!" Cana shouted back.
"REAL MEN SETTLE THINGS FACE TO FACE, WITH THEIR FISTS!" Elfman, who was also visibly covered in ice shards. "HIDING IN THE CEILING ISN'T MANLY, BUT GANGING UP ON SOMEONE IS EVEN WORSE!"
Lucy's head snapped up to glare at Elfman. "SCREW YOU! THAT'S HOW MY MAGIC WORKS, JERK!"
Gray threw his hands out, which looked hilarious while he was upside-down. "THANK YOU E—"
"GRAVITY CARD!" Cana yelled, and Gray was promptly yanked down from the ceiling—crashing into a table, headfirst.
"TAKE OVER: BEHEMOTH!" Eflman shouted, magic circle glowing beneath him, turning him into a giant... elephant man? Before charging at Lucy.
Lucy jumped up and pulled out a key. "OPEN! GATE OF THE RAM: ARIES! STOP HIM IN HIS TRACKS!"
A bell rang, and a ram woman appeared with a puff of pink smoke. Squeaking in fear, Aries squeezed her eyes shut, curling one arm into her chest, and threw her other arm out. "WOOL BOMB!"
A mass of pink wool exploded from the ram's hand. Elfman managed not to get swallowed by the wool before a chair came flying from the other side of the guild and smacked him in the head, allowing him—and about a fourth of the bar—to be completely and utterly buried in wool.
Following the arc of the chair back to the other side of the guild revealed that Juvia and Natsu weren't fighting each other anymore, or well, just each other.
Natsu was primarily fighting the green-haired man now—and the area he had been writing around had utterly destroyed when she hadn't been looking—and Juvia seemed to be being distracted by the pink-winged woman and the doll's man.
Distracted being the keyword, as she kept throwing random objects—likely including the chair that had brained Elfman—at Natsu. Judging by the multiple people on the ground with broken furniture lying on top of them, her aim was not that good.
"Hello!" A woman suddenly said, and Wynonna jumped behind Rembrandt. She had short white hair, a kind smile, and extensive scarring across her face, limbs, and torso. "My name is Lisanna. Are you two looking to join the guild?"
"Yes, of course!" Rembrandt responded, Wynonna taking a practiced step back to avoid the arm that Rembrandt flung out to make their cape flare. "This is truly the most evil guild in Fiore. I would graciously accept an invitation to join this diabolical group!"
"That's great!" Lisanna replied, faster than Wynonna could, and not missing a beat. "Quick question. What made you think we're the most evil guild, out of anyone else?"
"Standing up for your friends and defeating those sheep in wolves' clothing, Sabertooth, after their undignified behavior in that lawless tournament!" Rembrandt replied just as quickly.
"Ahh, well, you're in the right place for evil," Lisanna said with a wink. "The notorious She-Devil herself is in this guild!"
Wynonna blinked.
This guild was amazing.
"I'm aware!" Rembrandt responded, excitedly wrapping an arm around Wynonna. "We didn't get to see the depths of her fiendish behavior in the games, so we're very elated to make her acquaintance."
"Perfect," Lisanna said sweetly. "Please follow me."
Lisanna turned and began to walk directly through the middle of the chaos, and Wynonna struggled not to laugh as people froze mid-attack to let Lisanna pass, before immediately getting back to fighting the moment she was barely out of the way.
Rembrandt grabbed Wynonna's hand and began walking through the crowd, getting afforded the same courtesy, with attacks whizzing right by their heads as the Fairy Tail members only waited the absolute bare minimum for them to pass. It was nerve-wracking, but in a thrilling way.
Arms came out from the chaos behind them, wrapping around Wynonna and Rembrandt's shoulders.
"Hello," Loke said, pushing himself between the two of them. "Do you two lovely ladies have the time to talk about the most beautiful, amazing, talented, and kind mage of this generation, Lucy Heartfilia?"
"Oh my god!" The woman in question hissed in mortification. "Stop that!"
Gray snorted. "Are you serious?"
"You're such a dumbass Loke," Cana said, casually shuffling the cards in her hands.
"Yes, absolutely!" Rembrandt responded excitedly, and Wynonna nodded her head.
"Supporting your friends is manly!" Elfman shouted from where he was digging himself out of the small mountain of wool with an entierly diffrent takeover.
"Awesome! I'll be back in like," Loke leaned his head back to look at Gray. "Five minutes."
Gray scoffed. "You can try."
Cana cackled. "Oh, we absolutely can!"
"It would be faster if someone didn't butt in!" Lucy pouted.
"A real man stands his ground!" Was Elfman's reply.
"Aries," Lucy said dryly. "Again."
"I'm sorry!" The spirit squeaked, startled again. "SUPER FLUFFY WOOL!" Though this time, Elfman was far more prepared for the attack, despite still being partly trapped by the wool.
At that signal, chaos immediately broke back out again.
"ICE MAKE:—" Gray jumped back into position.
"REGULUS BEAM!" A light beam shot directly into Gray's face, who stumbled back with a curse, rubbing his eyes.
"BOOM CARD!" Cana yelled, capitalizing on Gray being blinded.
"ICE MAKE: COCOON!" And her attack didn't hit.
Turning away from the fight and back to where Lisanna was leading them, she saw a blue cat with a glass of milk sitting on bar.
Wynonna decided to ignore that.
"Hi! My name is Mirajane." A woman with a striking resemblance to Lisanna and cracks all over her body welcomed them the moment they stepped up to the bar. "It's nice to meet you both!"
"It's wonderful to make your acquaintance as well!" Rembrandt responded, and Lisanna sat on the counter. "I am Rembrandt, and this is my loyal assistant in all things, Wynonna."
Wynonna gave a shallow bow.
"You two want to join, right?" Mirajane asked, bending down to dig under the counter. "Think about where you want your guild marks while I grab this stamp..."
Wynonna turned to Rembrandt, who was practically shaking with excitement. They had picked out their mark placements in advance; it was one of the many things they talked about while packing.
"Oi, Salamander!" A voice shouted, startling Wynonna. "Quit fighting Juvie and those losers, and step up to a real fight!" Wynonna turned her head to follow the sound, only managing to catch a glimpse of black before he yelled, "IRON DRAGON'S ROAR!"
The attack—which looked stranger up close—looked both solid and strangely liquid as it blew past her and Rembrandt, starting from the right-most side, crashing into everything in its way as it traveled towards Natsu.
Who was on the left.
Wynonna watched in pure amazement as nearly everyone still standing was hit.
There was a moment of silence where only Gajeel's distinct-sounding laughter could be heard, before it all absolutely exploded in sound.
"HELL YEAH! COME AT ME GEARHEAD!"
"YOU HIT ARIES, YOU PIECE OF SHIT!"
"Oh, hey, I didn't know Gajeel was back." Lisanna said mildly from where she was sitting on the bar.
"YOU DISRESPECTFUL LIZARD!"
"GAJEEL, YOU FUCKING BASTARD!"
"He wasn't actually gone," Mirajane replied from where she was now searching a different set of cabinets. "He was just downstairs with Levy planning their job." She lifted her head to smile mischievously at Lisanna. "They were down there all alone for quite a long time, hmm? I wonder if Levy had anything interesting to share~" Lisanna giggled at her sister's words.
"WATCH IT, YOU NEANDERTHAL!"
"GATE CLOSE! YOU'LL PAY FOR THAT!"
"By the way, do you know where the stamp is?" Lisanna shook her head, and Mirajane frowned before standing up. "Kinana! Do you have the stamp?" Wynonna followed Mirajane's gaze to a purple-haired woman sitting behind the bar, eating chili peppers.
"WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU AIMING?!"
"NATSU IS JUVIA'S PREY!"
"Oh!" The woman responded, covering her mouth with her hand. "Yeah, I moved it to the top cabinets behind you. Some of the kids were trying to give themselves multiple marks again."
"BABIES! CHANGE OF TARGET!"
"REAL MEN FIGHT FACE TO FACE!"
Mirajane smiled brightly. "Thanks, Kinana!" Before tuning around and pulling the stamp out of the cabinet.
"FIRE DRAGON'S—"
"LOKE!"
Lisanna hopped off the bar, catching the stamp that Mirajane tossed to her. "Now," Lisanna said, facing the both of them with a kind smile. "Where do you want your marks?"
"REGULUS—"
"DARK ÉCRITURE—"
Rembrandt unbuttoned their shirt, before pointing to just beneath their collar bone on the left side of their body. "Right here!"
"RANDOM—"
"FAIRY BOMB—"
"Perfect!" Lisanna said, gently leaning over and stamping Rembrandt.
"ICE MAKE—"
"WATER—"
Rembrandt beamed at her new mark, and Lisanna turned to look at Wynonna. "And you?" Lisanna asked.
"X FORMATION—"
"PARTAL TAKEOVER—"
"Ah," Wynonna started awkwardly. "I want mine on my right shoulder blade."
"—ROAR!" "—IMPACT!" "—PAIN!" "—THROWING!" "—GREMLIN!" "—HAMMER!" "—SLICER!" "—FIRE!" "—SCALE BULL!"
A loud boom echoed throughout the guild, air whipping through the building from the sheer amount of spells hitting their target at once, blowing their hair and clothes violently. Small bits of debris being flung at them by the blast.
Lisanna clapped her hands in delight, holding them to her cheek. "You're matching but opposite! That's so cute!" She said brightly, without so much as a sideways glance towards the explosion. "Turn around so I can stamp you as well."
Wynonna did as instructed—lifting up her blouse so Lisanna could reach under—only to see a very unconscious Gajeel only a few feet away from her.
A stamp was pressed into her skin, and Wynonna saw a short, blue-haired girl sigh at the unconscious dragon-slayer, shaking her head.
"All done!" Lisanna said, and Wynonna didn't turn around, still watching as the blue-haired girl began dragging the slayer out of the wreckage.
"Are they always like this?" Wynonna asked.
"Oh, absolutely!" Lisanna replied with cheer. "Never a dull day!"
"Splendid!" Rembrandt replied, and Wynonna felt a bit silly being worried about their reaction to Rembrandt's quirks. The entire guild was just as weird.
"BRATS!" A giant man bellowed as he slammed the guild doors open. "WHICH ONE OF YOU IDIOTS VANDALIZED THE GRAND MAGIC GAMES COLOSSEUM?!"
The guild went silent. Eveyone confusedly looking around.
"Why the hell would any of us do that?" Natsu grumbled from the floor, looking scraped up and bruised, but mostly fine. "We won the games, and those idiots already had to apologize to us."
"Oh," Rembrandt said offhandedly. "Had I known that, I would have scaled down my evil plans a bit."
Everyone still conscious turned to look at Rembrandt, including the giant guild master. "Do you have your guild mark yet?"
Rembrandt nodded excitedly. "Yes—"
The guild master grabbed Rembrandt by their shoulders and began shaking them. "WHAT WERE YOU THINKING, CHILD! I LEFT THAT WHOLE SITUATION WITH NO PAPERWORK! NONE! AND YOU RUINED IT."
Wynonna laughed at Rembrandt getting scolded over paperwork, unable to get a word in edgewise due to being shaken too fast to speak.
Yeah, they'd fit right in here.