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Growing up as a queer individual in the 1980s is not easy. You can never really tell anyone about your sexuality. There's lots of judgement, debates about your rights, and you could possibly risk your life by sharing that information.
But for Richard, in his mind the hardest part is the dating pool. It's very hard to tell which guys you could actually come out to and ask out. It's not like his town is filled with gay men ready to find a boyfriend. It was very isolating, not knowing who to tell, who to trust, or who is also gay.
Hot guy after hot guy, everywhere all he saw was them with some girl. Making out, holding hands, matching outfits, giving each other gifts. He wishes he could live that life. He wishes he could find a boyfriend where he could do these activities with.
His friends always ask him why he doesn't have a girlfriend yet. “You're a great guy! You could be a womanizer! All the chicks would love you!” Could these have been hints for something deeper? Or is he deluding himself again with the desire to have a secret relationship?
His excuse was always “I just haven't found the one yet.” And that wasn't entirely a lie. He hasn't found the one. He can't even find anyone. So many men around him, some cute, and yet he knows he'll never have a chance.
Maybe things would be better outside of high school. Maybe he could grow up, go into the world, and find his community. People who understand him for who he is. People who also struggle with these feelings. And maybe then he could find the one.
Or maybe the universe was in his favor sooner than he thought.
-
His name was Pablo. 5’8, dark hair, beautiful, soft skin, eyes that would light up a globe. The two met in the library. They reached out for the same book. Their hands touched. It was like a cheesy, cliche movie scene. Sparks flew as they locked eyes. Both were stunned, and didn't know what to do. Their hands didn't move an inch.
Eventually, the silence was broken by an apology for Richard. “No worries,” Pablo responded. Oh God, his voice. Just when Richard thought he couldn't be anymore ethereal, his deep, tender octave ran through his body. Richard couldn't just walk away. He had to talk to him at least this once. Just to hear that amazing voice.
“I didn't know anyone else read The New York Trilogy!" Richard said.
“Are you kidding?” Pablo responded. “I love The New York Trilogy!”
“Me too,” Richard said.
Even though this was their first time ever meeting, they chatted the day away as if they were childhood friends. The conversation felt so… natural. Like they were drawn to each other. Like they were meant to meet each other this way.
The two lost track of time, and ended up late to class. Before splitting up, Richard had one more question to ask. “By the way, what's your name?”
“Pablo,” he responded. And Richard refused to let himself forget that.
-
If you had told Richard 35 years ago that he'd be married to the guy he had a crush on in high school, he'd think he's going crazy. Even when they went their separate ways, the universe has its funny methods to bring soulmates back together again.
Pride parades were not common, so it shouldn't come as a shock to anyone that many queer people would be there. What would come as a shock is seeing an old high school friend there. What would come as even more of a shock is recognizing him at first glance.
Immediately they recognized each other. They never forgot each other's names. They never forgot the stories they shared together. They never forgot the memories.
Long story short, they kicked off their relationship, and 35 years later, they're married with a beautiful daughter. Life has been an amazing journey with each other. Through all of the ups and downs, they never split up. They couldn't. It was always them against the world. And in their retirement years, they want to move to a beach house together. They can spend their last moments at shore, staring off into the sunset, in each other's arms