Archive of Our Own

The truth is, nobody cares about the opinion of a dabo girl. Nobody wants to know what her life was like before she started spinning the wheel; nobody is interested in her life when the costume is off.

Thinking is bad for business, Quark says, and because she needs to keep this job, Leeta keeps her thoughts to herself.

Even when it's hard. Everybody on the station knows about the Cardassian war orphan, and everybody has an opinion on what should be done with him. So does Leeta, and she wishes everyone would just shut up about it because none of them know what they're talking about. None of them are orphans of the Occupation. She is. 

She's appalled when she finds out that the Emissary sent the child to stay with the O'Briens. Miles O'Brien's hatred of the Cardassians is well known, almost notorious, and that kind of hatred isn't balanced out by Keiko O'Brien's kindness. And while they may be parents, they are neither Bajoran nor Cardassian, and it strikes Leeta as almost cruel to rip the poor boy from the only family he's known and send him to live with strange people, in a strange culture, who hate him. Why didn't the Prophets send the child to her? She's a Bajoran orphan who grew up in a Cardassian household -- as a servant and not a daughter, but she is still in a better position to understand the boy's plight than the O'Briens. 

When the Emissary sends the boy back to Cardassia, Leeta briefly questions the wisdom of the Prophets. It breaks her heart to see Proka Midgal walk to the shuttlebay alone. 

She says nothing. When her shift at Quark's is over, she goes to the temple and offers up a prayer.

She says nothing when she overhears Major Kira and Constable Odo talking about the Jem'Hadar boy, although it's sorely tempting. She's fascinated by his development and what it says about Jem'Hadar culture. How do you genetically encode an entire social structure? Nothing in any of the sociology reading she's managed to do with the remnants of Bajor's libraries has mentioned anything about a genetic component to the development of civilization. She's fascinated by the debate between them, the timeless "nature versus nurture" quandry.

But it's clearly a very personal discussion for the Major and the Constable, and not one that has room for her academic interest. 

Most people would be surprised to learn that she has academic interests. Quark certainly had been, and when he found out that she's interested in becoming a sociologist, he forbade her from talking about it. 

She doesn't. Not because of Quark…entirely. Mostly she just gets sick of the condescending looks people give her when she doesn't already know something. She's self-taught, not stupid, and sometimes she wants to remind the Starfleet officers that it isn't her fault the Cardassians destroyed so much of Bajor's intellectual resources. 

When she learns about Kai Winn, Vedek Bareil, and the peace negotiations with the Cardassians, her first thought isn't of her murdered parents, but of the terrible date she'd had the night before. The Starfleet officer had been absolutely charming until she mentioned her interest in sociology. He then proceeded to namedrop writers she's never heard of, books & articles she doesn't have access to, and altogether did his very best to make her feel like an ignorant country bumpkin. He seemed shocked when she didn't want to kiss him at the end of the night.

She doesn't want peace with the Cardassians, the people who shattered Bajor's ability to educate itself and then claimed its "ignorance" was justification for enslavement. And sometimes she's pretty sure she doesn't want Starfleet's so-called "help" either.

Still, she's not exactly happy when Akorem Laan takes Sisko's place as the Emissary. The d'jarras are not kind to orphans who have only one name. The Cardassians have ripped away their families; a return to the caste system would strip them of their identities as well. How can the Prophets turn their backs on children who have already suffered so much?

She doesn't dare mention this to anyone, in public or private, especially after Vedek Imutta is murdered. She feels like a kind of madness has taken over her people, and she has no d'jarra, no family, to protect her. 

Work becomes almost dangerous. Most of the Bajorans ignore her completely, as though she doesn't even exist, but more than a few see her lack of d'jarra as a license to do as they please with her. After the third time calling Starfleet security to his bar, Quark makes sure she only works tables with Starfleet or other alien customers, which cuts down on the harassment. He also cuts her hours. Leeta's not sure if that's to "protect" her or revenge for her participation in the Guild of Restaurant and Casino Employees.

When the Prophets restore Sisko to his position as Emissary, Leeta goes to the temple. She intends to offer up a prayer of gratitude, but it quickly turns into tears, washing away the pain & fear of the past few weeks. 

If life were like a Federation novel, she would have walked out of the temple  a different woman. She would have made some kind of resolution - to stand up for herself more and always speak her mind. But life isn't a novel, and not every decision is a mistake that must be learned from.

Do what you can with what you are given, for such is the will of the Prophets. She remembers that old proverb as she listens to Jake tell Nog all the rules of storytelling. How characters have to go through a "dramatic arc," grow and change so that by the end of the story, they can make a decision that they would not be able to make at the beginning. It strikes her as such a Terran view of story; Leeta wonders if she should point it out.

After a moment's consideration, she asks him if he's read any Bajoran literature.