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Mateo eyes Victoria where she sits on the bench across from him. Most of everyone has left, it’s just Donnie, Victoria, and him left but Victoria’s been staring off into space for the last seven minutes. Mateo would be lying if he wasn’t concerned.
Donnie claps his hand on Mateo’s shoulder, jolting him from his focus on the girl across from him. “I’m gonna head out. Gotta get home to the missus.”
Mateo nods at him. “Go, enjoy your sleep.”
Donnie gives a dry chuckle and packs the cooler up. He looks up at Victoria who still hasn’t moved and whispers under his breath. “You think she’ll be okay?”
Mateo follows his gaze. “Yeah, she’s a tough cookie. I think she’s just tired.”
Donnie nods. “Just… make sure she’s alright before you leave. Don’t leave her out here alone.”
Mateo gives him a blank stare. “No shit, Sherlock. What, you think I’m a piece of shit or something?”
Donnie rolls his eyes and smiles. “Whatever man, goodnight.”
Then he’s gone with his cooler.
Mateo returns his attention on the younger girl, who hasn’t even seemed to realize that Donnie left. He sighs softly, yeah she needs a distraction. It’s a road he’s gone down many times before, after a shitty shift it’s easy to get stuck in your own head and he doesn’t want that for her.
So he stands and walks over to her, sitting right next to her. Again, no acknowledgment from her and he doesn’t like it. It worries him, how she’s so deep into her thoughts.
He knocks his knee against hers. “Victoria? Hey,” He murmurs lowly, trying not to scare her. “C’mon, come back to me.”
It takes a couple of seconds and more gentle nudging of her knee, but eventually she blinks multiple times and takes a sharp breath in. Her big Bambi eyes take in their surroundings and finally land on him.
He gives her a soft smile. “Hey, you okay?”
She swallows and nods slowly. “Uh, where’d everyone go?”
The smile stays on his face, careful not to make her feel silly for zoning out. “They left not too long ago. Hey,” He knocks her knees again. “What are you gonna do tonight?”
“Um,” She shakes her head looking tired as ever. “I don’t know. I don’t really want to go home, my mom will make me recount all the cases I did today and tell me everything I did wrong and…”
“The last thing you want to do is rehash everything that happened today.” Mateo finishes for her, nodding his head.
“Yeah,” She breathes out, looking relieved that he got it.
He hesitates but thinks fuck it. “Hey, you know how I told you about my post shift routine?”
She blinks slowly at him. “Yeah, yeah, uh, long shower, comfy sweats, takeout, and tv, right?”
Mateo grins, touched that she remembered. “Yeah, that’s it. If you don’t have anywhere to go tonight, you could come over and… have your first post shift routine with me.”
Mateo thinks that if Victoria was any less tired, she’d be stammering and all flustered. But all she does is blink slowly. “What?”
Mateo backtracks just a bit. “I know that we only just met today, so that might be weird to offer you-“
“No, I, uh,” She seems to shake herself. “I’d like that, thank you.”
He nods his head slowly. “Yeah?” Then he tilts his head. “Wanna head out now?”
She nods and grabs her bag, which Mateo doesn’t let her carry. He immediately pulls it from her hands, giving her an easygoing smile and a head shake to not worry about it.
The car ride’s quiet, Mateo’s playlist fills the silence. He looks over at Victoria at a stoplight to see her drifting back into her head, fiddling with her purple scrunchie. Her eyes droop every so often and he can’t help but feel for her.
This was a hell of a shift for anyone, but especially for her first one.
Parking was quiet too, not a word was spoken. Just soft smiles and head tilts did most of the communication. But Victoria looks dead on her feet so Mateo slides her hand in his, just to make sure that she has something to hold onto while they climb the stairs to his apartment.
Her little gasp when he does that makes him grin softly to himself. But he doesn’t acknowledge it, just guides her to the door.
As they walk in, he sets their bags right by the shoes. “Shoes off and I’ll get you a change of clothes.”
Victoria opens her mouth. “Oh, you don’t have to-“
“Victoria, we worked well over 12 hours.” He pulls her into his room by the hand. “The last thing you want to do is spend another second in these scrubs. Here,” He rummages through his drawers, pulling out a gray shirt and black sweatpants. “Change into these and I’ll put your scrubs in the laundry with mine.”
She blinks at him. “Okay?” She says meekly.
He nods with a smile. “Okay. Bathroom’s right here. Enjoy your long, long hot shower.”
He winks at her. He probably shouldn’t flirt with her, but it seems like the only thing that gets her out of her stupor.
And it works, she gets all flustered and some life comes back into her eyes. And his chest eases just a bit at the sight.
While she’s showering, Mateo changes into his sweats and rushes around the apartment to clean up some clothes and blankets he left lying around. Victoria comes out just as he pulls up the menu on his phone for his favorite place to eat.
He looks up as she walks into the room, her damp hair frames her clean face. She still looks tired but looks like some life has some back to her eyes. And he can’t avoid how good she looks in his clothes. Mateo quickly shakes himself of that thought and hands her his phone.
“I have my order in the cart already, are you okay with ordering while I shower?”
She blinks. “Oh, uh, sure.”
He gives her a gentle smile. “My card’s already in there, so’s my address. All you gotta do is pick out whatever food you want and submit the order, ok?”
“Oh, uh I can pay-“ She says.
“No,” He stands and heads to the bathroom. “No chance. Order the food. Pick a show to watch when you’re finished.”
Usually, he’ll do a long shower, but he doesn’t want to keep her waiting. So he washes as quick as he can and finishes just in time to see her getting comfortable on the couch. He flips the lights off to see the tv screen better on his way to the couch.
“Order the food?” He hops over the couch with an energy that should not be there, but he musters it up just to hear her little giggle.
“Yup, it should be here in like five minutes.” She nods, lifting the blanket she had over her to include him. Without hesitation, he slides in right next to her. “And picked the Office to watch.”
He nods and grins. “Solid choice. I didn’t want to say it, but I might’ve kicked you out if you picked a bad show.”
She giggles again, her eyes drooping. “Glad I got it right, then.”
He nudges her arm. “Who’s your favorite character?”
“Jim. I highly relate to his need to stare into the camera every time something stupid happens.” She hums. “Who’s yours?”
He grins. “Yeah, I can see that. Mine would be Dwight. Man’s just hilarious.”
She giggles again. “He really is.”
“Which character would you be if you were in the show?” He asks.
She hums. “Pam, for sure. She’s just… relatable. Plus she gets the guy in the end. How about you?”
He doesn’t know why he says it but he did anyway. “I think I’d be Jim.” Mateo tells himself it has nothing to do with the fact that Jim and Pam end up together, but that’s where his mind immediately went.
Fuck, he’s not supposed to like her.
Before they can say anymore, there’s a knock on the door. He sits up and looks at her with excited eyes. “Food’s here.”
Once he tips the delivery guy and gets the food all situated for them, they sit side by side under the blanket. They don’t say much while eating, other than commenting on the show.
When the food’s all gone, they watch the last of the episode. Mateo’s about to ask her if she wants to watch another one when her head lightly thumps onto his shoulder. He dips his eyes down to see that she’s fallen asleep, looking peaceful.
He slowly shifts his arm to drape over her shoulder, so that she’d be more comfortable resting on his chest instead. The next episode plays and he lets himself fall asleep somewhere in the middle of it.
——
He wakes up to sunlight filtering in through the windows. A soft grunt escapes him as he realizes that he fell asleep on the couch. A pressure on his chest has him dipping his eyes down to see a Victoria Javadi asleep on him.
He blinks the sleep from his eyes. They must’ve moved in their sleep during the night, he’s now on his back with her on top of him. The tv’s stoped playing the episodes, leaving the screensaver playing.
He expects to feel panicky at her asleep on him, like he usually does if a girl spends the night. But the urge to push her away never comes. There’s no regret pooling in his stomach or an itch to run. Instead, he wraps his free arm around her back, playing with her hair absentmindedly. He smirks when he sees that she has naturally curly hair and he thinks that it fits her well.
A soft murmur comes from the girl as she slowly wakes up. He doesn’t move his hand, letting her realize where she is. And she must’ve gotten enough sleep, because now she’s back to being her bumbling, awkward self.
“Oh! Uh,” She tries to push off his chest, but he tightens his grip on her. Mateo isn’t sure why he does it but, he knows he just wants her to stay with him.
“Shh, it’s okay. Just…” He clicks the tv remote to resume watching the show. “Watch an episode, calm down a bit.” He lets his hand drag down her spine. “It’s a good way to spend the morning.”
He can feel her gulp hard, but she stops trying to get up. “I didn’t mean to fall asleep on you, sorry.” She murmurs so quietly that he almost misses it.
He drags his hand back to her neck, making sure his fingers find her pulse. It’s too fast for his liking. “I know,” He murmurs back. “I don’t mind.”
Then, her body finally relaxes in his hold and he lets a small smile grow on his face. Her pulse is still fast, but he knows that’s because she likes him. And he grins even more at that fact.
“Don’t you- don’t you have work today?” She asks.
He hums, rubbing his thumb on the top of her spine. “No, I work four on, three off. So I won’t be back to work until Tuesday.” He squeezes her neck and enjoys the jump in her pulse, be he reminds himself that he’s trying to lower her pulse.
It’s like he’s trying to do exposure therapy for her, hopefully the more she feels more comfortable and not nervous around him, the more he’ll get to see who she really is. And he’s gotten a glimpse of it when overhearing her conversations with others.
“Oh, you don’t have to go to the hospital today, right?” He really hopes not.
“No, no.” She takes a deep breath. “Off on the weekends, for studying… which I should probably be doing right now.”
But she doesn’t make a move to get up and he smiles again. “Well, you had a hell of a shift yesterday so… I think you can let your brain rest for today.”
She hums and rubs her cheek into his chest to get more comfortable. And finally, her pulse slowly lowers.
“This is a really nice way to start the weekend.” She relents, but then rushes to add. “Uh, I mean laying on the couch and watching a sitcom, not waking up on you… not that I’m not enjoying it or, uh that you’re- please stop me.”
He chuckles and runs his hand over her back to the base of her spine. “I get what you mean.” He tucks his other hand behind his head and rubs her back. “It’s the best thing to do after a rough week in my opinion.” He threads his hand through her hair again. “I’m glad you’re here.”
She moves her head up to look at him, her chin pressing gently on his sternum. He doesn’t move his hand and meets her stare.
“Thank you,” She murmurs. “For helping me last night. I know I was… kinda out of it.”
He moves a strand of hair out of her face. “Anytime, you weren’t the only one struggling. It was a rough night.”
She blinks at him, her eyes showing some sadness. “How do you do it? The whole day was… I mean, the children that died, Dana getting punched, the mass shooting,” She swallows hard, her eyes welling up. “How do you do it?”
He swallows hard. “Sometimes I don’t know I do it, or how any of us do it.” He continues to play with her hair. “Some of us try to forget it, bury it as deep as possible. Some of us will share our shitty days with others, sometimes you need to spend time with people so you’re not alone with your thoughts.”
He bites his lips. “I… I try to remember that there’s good parts to the job. There’s the times where we save people, and that’s what makes it all worth it. On days like yesterday, I’ll usually get a good cry out and then just try to forget about it.”
She lets a tear fall and he’s quick to catch it with his thumb. “Guess I have a lot of learning to do. Nothing in medical school or any of the books prepare us for how to handle the aftermath.”
He rubs her cheek and agrees softly. “Yeah, but you’ll figure it out, I’ll help you. You’re not alone in it.”
“Thank you.” She whispers. Then she moves her cheek back to his chest and they watch the office for most of the morning.
She ignores her mother’s phone calls and his hand never stops running up and down her back or in her hair.
It was a good morning. And Mateo thinks that he could get used to mornings like these.