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You and Dave had been at the adoption center for well over an hour. The two of you had decided to divide and conquer, so you haven’t seen him for a while now. You’ve talked to a lot of the kids here. Most of them are nice and sweet, but you’re just not sure. You and Dave decided on adopting only one child, but you can’t just choose one! You should just go find Dave and see if he is fond of any of them. He’s the picky one. You’re about to go looking for him until he comes walking towards you, a small girl in his arms. He’s grinning.
“John, she’s the one,” he says. “We’re adopting her. Go ahead, tell John what you told me.” You look into her wide blue eyes. She’s smiling.
She looks to Dave, and he nods. She opens her mouth and says, “Fuck.”
Your eyes widen slightly. “Dave, did you teach her to say that?”
“No, I didn’t!” he exclaimed. “I just asked her if she knew any naughty words, and that was the first one she said. We’re adopting her, John.”
“How old is she? She shouldn’t know those kinds of words,” you say.
“She’s three, John,” Dave says, “and she grew up with older kids saying that kind of stuff all of the time, how would she not know it? At least she knows it’s a bad word.”
“Fuck,” the little blonde says, smiling innocently.
“Thanks,” you say to her. “But I don’t know, I found a lot of other kids that-”
“John.”
“What, Dave?” you ask, exasperated.
“Her name’s Casey,” he says. You look at the little girl. She nods happily.
“It is?”
“Yup,” he says, popping the ‘p’.
“Where’s the head lady person?” you ask. Dave just smiles.
“I knew that would get you,” he says.
“Well, she does look a lot like Casey, minus the whole salamander thing,” you say. “She’s even wearing a yellow dress.”
“I knew you’d love her,” he says.
“Shut up, Dave,” you say, pushing past him to find the director.
“That’s a mean word!” Casey exclaims from Dave’s arms. It’s a good thing she has her priorities straight. You roll your eyes, but you smile.
“I’m sorry, Casey. I’ll remember that for next time.”
Dave snorts.
“Shut-” you stop yourself. “Be quiet, Dave. Let’s go adopt this cutie.”
