Chapter Text
“I think he fainted. Please do something.” Her voice was breaking. Whether it was from the tears causing her to choke up or the bumpy road as the ambulance shook on its way to the hospital, Seo Dan couldn’t tell. “Do something, please. Anything.” She watched the man in the corner shake his head. “I feel…so bad for him.” The tears burned her eyes. He was so stupid. How could he have done this to her? The first man to like her–the first man to look at her–was slipping away. She was desperate. Her hands reached out to him.
“Wake up. Please wake up Seung-jun. Please,” she begged. The ring on her finger shifted as her hand splayed against his face. Her hand trailed down, her fingers pressing against his neck. She drew in a shaky gasp. She had felt it. A pulse. It was there. Her head shot up to the man in the corner. “Please, help him. I felt–” She can’t finish. Her words start to blend together as she desperately begs the man for help. He shifts, finally, his hands going to Seung-jun. Dan leaned back, her hands shaking. His blood is on them. She could vomit. The man puts the mask back onto Seung-jun’s face and Dan sees his chest rise. It’s shallow, barely noticeable, but it’s there. For a split second she’s able to breathe. The ambulance hits a bump in the road and Dan’s hands shoot out to stop Seung-jun’s body from moving too hard. She’s shaking terribly.
She doesn’t leave the hospital. She refuses. A nurse has to usher her away from Seung-jun’s body in the stretcher as he’s rushed inside. Her legs can’t stop shaking as she sits and waits for any word about him. Her face is buried in her hands for a moment before she pulls them away, staring down at them. They’re stained red from where they pressed against Seung-jun’s wounds. She stands and rushes to the bathroom, barely making it before she hunches over a toilet and hurls. She’s sobbing.
Hours pass. She’s called her mother and her uncle. They’re in the hospital waiting room with her, silent for once. Dan sits in a seat, her body numb. She can’t get rid of the tight feeling in her chest. Once the doctor she had seen earlier comes out, she immediately rises. She stays quiet but her body is coiled tight.
“He’s lost a lot of blood. He’s still unconscious but we’ve managed to get him to a stable condition.” She simply nods but her gaze is at the floor. She feels powerless. “You can go to see him.” Dan’s throat dries up. She doesn’t know if she could stand to. Not now. Not when he’d still look like he had died. Would he be warm if she touched him? Or would his body feel unfamiliar? Her mother’s hand touches her arm, breaking her from her stupor. The next minute is a blur. She can hear the voices of her mother, her uncle, the doctor, patients around them, the nurses, but nothing is sticking.
Suddenly, before she can fully process it, she’s staring down at him. He’s right there, in front of her. Dead asleep. She could touch him. Her hand reaches out–still reddened. She might vomit again. She can see him breathing. It’s not shallow anymore. It’s not barely there. She can see it through the blanket wrapped around his torso. He’s so sickly pale. Her shoulders begin to shake. She can’t stop herself. Someone’s hand is on her shoulder, she can’t tell which one of the two it is but it’s holding onto her like a lifeline. Her tears are falling onto his sheets and leaving wet splotches. But she can breathe. Her lungs fill with so much air as she chokes out sobs. The tightness in her chest leaves her alone for a bit.
Her mother convinces her to go home. Just for a bit. Just to wash up and eat and get some semblance of rest. Her uncle stays in the hospital with Seung-jun. He swore he’d call at any sign of something. It’s only when she’s getting dressed does her brain begin to think again. He could have left.
He should have.
He would have been on a flight to Europe. He’d have touched down by now. There wouldn’t be gaping holes in his chest. He’d probably be trying to smoothtalk someone into helping him. He’d be smiling. He wouldn’t be debilitated. He would have visited, eventually. And she would have been waiting for him. What was he going to do when he woke up? He couldn’t stay here. He’d still be a wanted man. Even after he had given up everything to save her life. Her chest begins to tighten again and her knees shake. She might have preferred to grieve him.
It’s restless, the hospital. There’s a constant noise outside of Seung-jun’s room. It gets brought in when her uncle stops by to leave something for Dan. Something from her mother. Something from him. Something from anyone just so there’s an excuse to see her, to see how she’s doing. She barely moves from her spot when she’s there. She stays perched in a chair by his bed. Close enough to see every small movement from him. Far enough so it doesn’t hurt. She leaves when she has to. But always confirms with as many nurses as she can that she’ll be contacted at the first sign of anything.
It’s devastating.
She can’t help it.
It’s so cruel.
But her eyes never look away.
He’s still pale. Still looks like something’s wrong. But he’s kept alive. That’s all she can ask for at this point.
It’s been three days since Seung-jun’s been admitted when there’s finally something. A nurse tells Dan that she saw his fingers move. It’s enough to have her rush to the hospital and not take her eyes off him. The sun streams in through the window, going past her and hitting his eyes. For a second, she was sure that he stopped breathing. Dan hesitated for a moment, worried about someone walking in before she lifted her hand up and blocked the sun from hitting his eyes. Seung-jun drew in a shaky breath and Dan’s shoulders relaxed before they started tensing up again. He was moving. She stopped blinking entirely and it was then that his eyes slowly fluttered open. They were open just a crack but enough for him to see her as she was stuck with her hand up, shielding his eyes from the sun. A weak smile tugged on his lips.
“Heaven,” was all that he hoarsely croaked out. Dan couldn’t help it. She let out a small huff of a laugh, the relief hitting her body like a truck. Her breathing grew heavy as she stared at him, his eyes open, that stupid smile of his faintly there. The tears from her eyes begin to fall before she even registers that they’re coming. Her hand finally falls as she grips onto the fabric of her skirt, drawing in gasping breaths. Seung-jun’s expression quickly changed, concern flashing over his features. He starts to sit up before Dan’s head shoots up.
“Stop it. You’ll hurt yourself further,” she says as her hands reach out to stop him from moving. Her touch is gentle yet firm as she pushes him back down a bit. Before he can speak again, her eyes widen slightly before she abruptly stands. “Nurse. I have to get a nurse.” She rushes towards the door, looking back at him one time to make sure he’s really there–make sure he’s really awake before she almost bolts out the door.
Nurses crowd him at his bed, checking his vitals, assessing his level of consciousness, a few just there to ‘appreciate the view’ as Seung-jun lays there with his body slightly aching. It feels like hours until he’s finally able to be left alone. He pretends the strain of talking is too much when they ask him anything personal. He can only hope whatever information Dan filled out for him would keep him safe for a bit longer. For a moment, while he laid there staring at the ceiling, a dull and constant ache between his ribs, he wished the bullets would have slightly disfigured his face to better disguise him. His vanity kicks back in when the door to his room began to open. He does his best to look as pained as he can when Dan’s eyes meet his. She stops at the foot of his bed.
“Europe,” is all she says. Seung-jun’s expression falters. There’s a heavy silence between the two of them before she speaks again. “You were supposed to be there by now.”
“Dan–”
“You were supposed to go to Europe and visit me when you were doing better. You were supposed to find me here, single, and ask for a chance.” There’s an urgency in her voice like she needs him to hear her. “What am I supposed to do with you here now?”
“I should have died to be spared the lecture.”
“Stop it,” she almost lashes out. “You said you would keep in mind where you were going from now on.”
“I did,” he quickly retorts, his voice definitive.
“You would have been safe–”
“You would have been dead,” Seung-jun cuts her off. “I kept in mind where I was going, Dan. I kept in mind that you were there. That they had you.” He tries to sit up again, partially succeeding as he props himself up on one elbow. He’s drawing in heavier breaths now. Dan goes to his side, her face contorted into a grimace as she fights the urge to let tears spill again over the state of him. She sinks into the chair right next to his bed, her head going into her hands. His gaze never leaves her. “Your life is worth thousands more than mine is.”
Her shoulders begin to shake.
“I would have gone into that building a hundred times over, knowing the outcome of what would happen to me, just to make sure you live a long and healthy life.” He lets out a pained huff as he shifts how he’s propped himself up.
“They stitched your wounds. You have to stop moving or you’ll–” She can barely finish the sentence before a sob forces itself out of her throat. Seung-jun’s hand reaches out to her. It trembles slightly as he brushes the tears from her face.
“Don’t worry about me. I’ll figure out a new plan to make it out of here.” Dan’s eyes flick up to meet his. A smile started spreading on his lips. “As long as you’re taking care of me in here, I’ll get better quick.” She lets out an exasperated scoff, her lips fighting the frown on her face and her eyes glint with a hint of warmth.
“How do you say so many foolish things?” Seung-jun’s smile breaks into a grin.
“You make it easy for me.”
“Mom.”
“Yes.”
“Uncle.”
“Yes.”
“I want to get my revenge.”
Seung-jun was still in the hospital. He was getting better right before her eyes. Despite his words, Dan wasn’t sure how much she was really taking care of him but it seemed her company was all he wanted. But the moments she was home away from him, finally letting herself rest, her mind festered with her own thoughts of what should be done. She started to go over what he had told her about his life, how he ended up here. She’d need help. Obviously. There were too many factors–too many people–involved for Dan to take care of everything herself.
“We’re experts in that field.” Perfect.
“I was starting to think you got on a flight yourself,” Seung-jun greeted her as she entered his room. He was sitting up in bed properly now, a lack of a scowl on his face from pain.
“What have you figured out for yourself?”
“What?”
“To make it out of here. Alive.” Seung-jun’s face became partially blank at that.
“Well I–There’s this–You see, I” He stops himself before he can get too far.
“I know how to get you out. And ensure your safety.”
“How?”
Dan lifts her sunglasses up, pulling them off her face to hold in gloved hands. “You’re going to have to die.”