Chapter Text
August 26th 1992
“So how are the nightmares?”
Will sat on the beige couch in the therapist's office. The nightmares started in May, every other night he would wake up sweating in panic that something was going to ‘get him’. After Will moved away he met people, got friends, made a life for himself. He was happy. Then in April he saw his boyfriend making out with some random guy on a street corner and it all went downhill. The next day they got into a huge argument about it. It ended in Will screaming at Carlton to get out and with that all the windows shattered. Carlton basically ran out of the apartment. Will was left in the mess with a bloody nose. He realized that he still had Henry's powers except they were different. They weren't Henrys anymore. When Henry died it seemed like his powers didn't disappear, instead simply transferred to Will. He hadn't told anyone about his powers, how could he? Jane had killed herself just to get away. He tried to hide them at first, but every time he lashed out or got too overwhelmed they would just come right back. He had went and gotten himself a therapist.
Obviously he would never be able to tell her about why he was really there. All she knew was about how he got lost in the woods for a while when he was younger, lost a sister and started randomly lashing out.
“They aren't as bad the past few weeks, I think the new medication is working.” Will responded not wanting to make eye contact.
“When was the last nightmare?” Mrs. Rodney said with her kind eyes. She reminds Will of his own mom. Boy did he miss her. He hasn't been able to visit her in a couple months.
“Last night… but it wasn't that bad really!” Will said almost like he was trying to defend himself. ”I don't even remember what it was about!”
Mrs. Rodney set her notebook on the table next to her, she lowered her glasses and gave Will that kind look. All Will saw was pity.
“Will… we can’t keep doing this if you're just going to keep lying to me.”
Busted.
“It's not a total lie… I mean I can't remember all the details.”
Mrs. Rodney pushed her glasses back up, and picked up her notebook and started scribbling down something.
Will thought about what she might have been writing. Maybe she thought he was crazy, making it all up for drugs. Or maybe she thought he was weak, for coming to a random lady just to blab about all his issues. Or maybe she knew, knew that he hated himself, knew that every night he went to sleep he was just wishing that he wouldn't wake up again. Wishing that this whole nightmare would be over.
“I’m prescribing you some SSRIs.” She said hastily.
“Some SS- wha what?”
“SSRIs, selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors.” She said slowly, almost like she was spelling out a word for a kindergardener. “They will help you stabilize your mood swings and reduce irritability. I’m also going to give you this.”
She reached into the small box next to her on the coffee table and pulled out a couple of teabags. “Have a cup of tea before bed. It might help with the nightmares.”
“A cup of tea? Why no sleeping pills?” Will asked surprised.
“You know why.” She responded.
Will had swallowed half a bottle in June. If his roommate wasn't there that day then Will would have died. Jonathan, his therapist and his roommate Sammy were the only ones that knew about that. He regrets telling Jonathan. Now he won't stop calling and stopping in for surprise visits.
“I was having a bad week. I won't do it again.”
“I'm sorry Will, but unless I see significant progress in our sessions I can't prescribe anything that could be lethal.”
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September 3rd 1992
Will was sitting in his bed sketching his view from his window. He drew the shadows of the dumpster. The random meth-head sleeping by the alley, even the granny smoking outside her shawarma shop. He flipped through some of his older drawings from Hawkins. Mike, Mike, Mike and more Mike. Damn, he drew that kid a lot. Will set down his sketchbook in frustration. Every little thing he did made him think of Micheal freaking Wheeler. But Micheal Wheeler probably hadn't thought about him in months.
After Jane died they still had to go to school. Pretend everything was normal when everything felt like it was falling apart. The last time he saw Mike was before he moved to New York two years ago. Mike was helping him pact up what little stuff he had when they shared a moment. Will wasn't exactly sure what it meant. I mean Mike was straight, he didn't feel the same way. But for those 10 seconds when they stared into each other's eyes, it felt like more than just friendship. He felt that gravitational pull towards Mike, towards his lips. He thought that Mike might have felt it too.
But then he never called. Not once since he moved to New York. He hadn't heard Mike's voice in two years.
“Hey.” Will jumped.
“Jeez, Sammy, you scared me.”
He turned fully towards Sammy. Sammy was short for Samantha but she thought that Sammy sounded hotter. She was wearing a sleeveless red v-neck with a flannel shirt tied around her waist. She had her light brown hair tied up in a half-up half-down type hairstyle. Her freckles decorated her face and shoulders, along with at least 10 different rings and bracelets. Will had met Sammy at a club about a week after he moved to New York. She needed a place to stay and Will desperately needed a roommate. Plus none of the neighbours would bother them anymore since they all just thought they were dating. Sammy reminded him of Robin, not just because she liked girls but because of her urge to always say what was on her mind. It was honestly refreshing not being around people who were scared to say what they really thought.
“Sorry man, I was just wondering if you wanted any cereal? I was going to order some pizza but then I remembered we’re like super broke sooo.” “Yeah, no cereal sounds fine.” he replied looking down. “You okay Will? Did you have another nightmare last night?”
Will thinks back about his dream last night.
Will is twelve again, standing in cold woods, just like home but wrong. The air is too cold, weird particles floating in it. It reminded him of Mordor or maybe the vale of shadows. He's tired. He doesn't know how long he's been walking through these vine covered woods. All he knows is he can't let the monster get him.
Then he hears it. “Will!”
It's almost like an echo, like they're screaming through the other side.
His heart jumps. “I’m here,” he says, but his voice is barely a whisper. He tries again, louder. “I’m here! Please!” His throat scratches as he yells, he starts to cry but he doesn't care. Not when he can hear his moms voice.
“Will! If you can hear us, call out!”
“I am calling!” he cries. “I can hear you. I’m right here.” The voices start to fade, as if they were walking away. Leaving little Will all alone.
The woods fall quiet. There's no real wind here, no birds, no squirrels. It's just empty and quiet.
Too quiet.
Something snaps behind him. He whips his head around to see a shadow zip through the trees.
It’s found him. It always does.
Will covers his mouth with both hands, shaking so hard it hurts, trying not to make a sound. His heart pounds against his chest.
Far away, someone says his name again. “Will?”
He wants to run to it, but he knows there's nothing there. Instead he takes off in a different direction, towards castle Byers.
He hears the monster let out a loud nasty screech before taking off after him. Its big claws break branches as it runs. He trips and falls on his face, slicing open a large gash on his face right over his nose. He turns around desperate to see the monster, it's taller than he thought, maybe 9ft. It approaches him now just using its two legs, sort of human like. But this thing is far from human.
It looks wrong. Its arms are too long, fingers with boney joints and prominent bloody claws. It looms over him, almost as if its taking in his fear. Its face splits open, slowly, the skin peeling back in thick layers in almost a flower shape. Inside there’s nothing familiar—just rows and rows of teeth, wet and uneven, leading into a dark hole that seems to go on forever. No eyes. Nothing to look back at him. And somehow that’s worse. It goes to lunge at him, mouth first.
The dream ends there, it always does. Will knows what actually happened. He knows that he shot it and escaped. But the dream never shows him escaping just when he thought he was going to die.
“Nope. No nightmares” Will finally responds to Sammy.
Ring ring ring, Ring ring ring
Sammy looks like she doesn't believe him but sighs before going to get the phone.
Will lets out a breath he didn't know he was holding. Every time someone's around he feels like he needs to perform. Pretend that everything's okay when he knows that nothing is. New York is nice, but it's not home.
“Will!!” Sammy calls out from the other room, “It's for you!”
Will rubs his eyes. Before standing up and walking towards the blue phone on the wall.
“Hello?” Will asks.
It was Dustin “Hey man! It's been a long time since we've talked, it's been, what a month? Jeez time flys, anywho was wondering if you were going to come down to Hawkins for the Dnd weekend!”
In all honesty Will had totally forgotten about it. They all made a pact that everytime someone made an accomplishment in life they would all head back to Hawkins from wherever they were and have a big dungeons and dragons and sleepover weekend together at the squawk. Recently Dustin had passed one of his college courses with the highest grade in the class and so they were going to have one of the first dnd weekends. Will didn't want to go, on any normal occasion he would want to spend the whole weekend making DnD characters, building stronger bonds with his friends and celebrating Dustin's achievement.
But these weren't normal conditions. Ever since he got his powers he had been terrified of feeling anything. If he accidently broke a glass with his emotions around Sammy or any of his other friends they wouldn't know it was him. But if he got a nosebleed in front of anyone from Hawkins.
Life is over.
Another reason he didn't want to go was Mike. Things had been so awkward when he left and he hadn't spoken to the boy in two years. What would they even talk about?
“Right… listen Dustin you know I love you guys but I don't know about that.. I've been really busy with art school recently and life. I hope you understand.”
There was silence on the other end for a long time, Will had thought that maybe the line had hung up or that Dustin didn't hear him.
“No.”
“What? Dustin, what do you mean no?”
“I mean no! You are not doing this again Will! It's been forever since we have all been together! Look, I know that losing your sister was hard on you. But it was hard on all of us. You've been distancing yourself, and I am not letting you do it. September 10th at the squawk. Be there or I swear to god I will drag everyone's asses in the van and we will drive to New York ourselves! ”
Click!
Well, shit.
I guess Will is going back to Indiana.