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When Snape walked into the Order meeting the first time that night, his pace was already impatient and his jaw clenched. Being late got him more than a few disapproving glances and the usual remark from Black, who couldn’t pass the opportunity.
“Having too much fun playing with your little Death Eater friends?”
That was fair game. Not that he could do anything about it, of course, but one wouldn’t expect a dog to understand that.
When, ten minutes later, he suddenly hissed and got up from his seat, interrupting Moody’s speech, that got him another round of sarcasm.
“Missing them already?”
Arthur and Molly had the good grace to send him a look of commiseration as he walked away, readying himself for what was to come.
“I should be back in 15 minutes, 30 if I’m unlucky.”
Dumbledore nodded, patting him on the shoulder.
When he did come back, 30 minutes later, they all noticed the stiffness in his walk, the tension in his features, and refrained from commenting.
“Severus, anything interesting?”
He snorted. If they only knew…
“I guess. Plans are off tonight as the Dark Lord is too busy but Lestrange and Mulciber have been…”
He hissed again, half in indignation this time, as he clutched the mark.
“You can’t be serious, I just left!”
They all looked at him with something that looked suspiciously like sympathy as he steadied himself one more time.
“Fifteen minutes. I’ll be back.”
And he walked away.
Concerned looks followed him as he left the room.
“That is unusual,” Arthur noted. “I hope this doesn’t presage something terrible.”
“I guess we will have to wait to find out,” Dumbledore calmly replied, but the worry in his eyes was obvious.
When Severus stepped back in again 30 minutes later, the first thing they noticed was the twitch in his eye, significantly redder, and the tremor in his hand. Even Black didn’t dare make a remark as he let himself collapse in his chair, his mood foul and ready to snap the head off the first person who would try him.
“There is an attack planned on the Ministry,” he started through clenched teeth. “But it’s at an early phase, because the Dark Lord has been extremely busy and annoyed. Right now, everyone is avoiding Malfoy Manor like the plague, supposedly all on recon missions, I don’t even know what that coward Avery is doing and…”
He took a deep breath.
“Water. Can I have some water?”
They all jumped to get the jug and a glass to him, as he settled a bit more in his seat, letting out a long sigh.
“This is just ridiculous,” he mumbled.
“That is a very good piece of information,” Dumbledore said in a soothing voice. “Thank you, Severus, you are doing an excellent job.”
“I don’t need to be placated,” he snapped back. “”What I need is for… oh for Merlin’s sake, come one!” he let out, looking at his sleeve in desperate disbelief.
Pulling himself together, he stood up, not looking at anyone.
“Fifteen. Who am I kidding, thirty minutes. Just… can someone make himself useful and make some coffee?”
Tonks let out a nervous chuckle as he disappeared again, leaving the whole Order feeling more gloomy than they had in a long time.
“Maybe we do ask too much of him,” Lupin said softly. “Isn’t there anything we can do to make things a bit easier for him? Apart from coffee, I mean?”
“I wish there was,” Albus nodded sadly. “Unfortunately, there isn’t much that is in our power to change now.”
“He made his choices,” Sirius said between his teeth. “He can live with them now.”
But even he had no more retort, that night, when Snape was called back from the meeting for the fifth time. The spy looked more like a madman now, hair sticking in all directions, shoulders so stiff they were shaking, his usual mask of sternness finally slipping.
He had been sipping his cup of coffee for no more than twenty minutes when he had dropped the mug, closing his eyes in exhaustion as they all looked at him, pity plain on their faces.
When he opened his eyes, trying to smooth away the anger and quiet desperation, all that was left was resignation.
“I won’t be back tonight. That’s clearly useless.”
“My child, I hope you know we are aware of your sacrifice…”
But he didn’t seem to be listening as he left his chair, not even noticing that Black himself looked at him with concern.
He paused in front of the fireplace.
“I can’t. keep. doing. this.” Each word was punctuated by a punch on the mantel.
The last thing he heard was Lupin’s voice, urging Dumbledore.
“You have to do something, we’re going to lose him if this goes on!”
But he didn’t care. He knew what he had to do.
Again.
Lucius Malfoy looked at the scene with blank, tired eyes. This was his life now. He had chosen this. THEY had chosen this. He had to agree with Severus though, Avery would have to pay for what he did.
It had been a week now since the Death Eater had brought it back from a muggle home he had raided. “MAGIC DOMINATION II”. The title of the thing had made him curious and he had diligently brought it back to his master. What was that doing in a muggle house?
Severus had to explain to them the concept of video games. Then, the Dark Lord had insisted that they get the whole setting installed in his living room, here in Malfoy Manor. The television, the console, the electricity…
And that had been the beginning of the end. Now here they were, again, and he could tell Snape was at the end of his rope. The guy was going to snap any minute now. Apparently, he was the only one who knew how to “beat the boss”, whatever that meant.
“No, my Lord, look, all you have to do is press X and Y while simultaneously jumping. Like this.”
“THAT IS WHAT I AM DOING!”
“Well CLEARLY NOT, if you would just look at my finger placement now, you push THIS button and… no, THIS button. Yes. No, you can’t attack while he’s in this form, your spells are locked.”
“THIS IS CLEARLY BUGGED!”
“It’s NOT, you just need to wait for it to… now, attack now!”
Half bloods, Lucius thought. This is what you got for following half-bloods.
As he watched the two men fighting over the controller and the potion master lose whatever was left of his patience, he let out a long sigh.
Hopefully, this would soon be game over for them all.