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“Tim, I think it's time we had a talk."
"For fuck stake, I nearly managed to kill that boss, what is it?" Tim responds irritated that Dick interrupted him.
"Tim, we're concerned."
"We're concerned? Who’s we? About what?"
"You keep insisting that you're living with your partner. I've been hanging out here for 3 days, and I have gotten no hint of anyone here."
"They left to give us space?"
"Tim, there is absolutely no evidence that you have one, there are no photos, no objects that belong to them. When I went into your bathroom yesterday to rinse the coke off that you spilled on me, there was nothing there that showed a sign of cohabitation."
"They tidied up their stuff? They also took their personal care products with them?" Tim doesn't see any problems with his partner being neat and not leaving his things around carelessly.
"Tim, are you lying about having a partner? Or is it more embarrassing like a virtual boyfriend, Tim you cannot date an AI Bot." Dick lectures.
"First of all, how dare you imply that I would even use AI, second of all they exist!" Tim shouts outraged at the mere idea that he would use AI and the concept that he made up his partner (totally ignoring the fake uncle debacle).
"Are you sure about that?" Dick presses on, "What's their name?"
"Danny!"
"What's their last name?"
"Nightshade!"
"You're dating a Danny Nightshade."
"Yes!"
"You couldn't have made up a better fake name?" Dick looks so done with Tim, which is beyond rude.
"He's real!" Tim insists.
Dick without a word pulls out his phone and dials a number and puts it on speaker.
"The hero voted the worst haircut by the Justice League 3 years running, why are you calling me?" Oracle taunts.
"Look up a Danny Nightshade. Tim allegedly finally spilled and gave up the name of his partner," Dick asks, completely ignoring Oracle's first comment that makes Tim snicker.
"I'm honestly surprised you got him to break," Oracle mused to Dick as the duo heard rapid typing.
"Danny Nightshade, aged 24, no recent photos, or any photos. He graduated from a high school in….the fuck is amity park. Took some time off and is now a PhD student at Gotham University studying theoretical physics. Tim this guy sounds like either a really bad fake profile or you’re dating a future villain,” Oracles ends in a teasing tone.
Tim looks away embarrassed at the thought of his Danny being a villain.
"If I was making a profile, it would not be that bad!" Tim defended himself.
"24!?!!? Tim you're 19!" Dick explodes out.
"Danny doesn't mind."
Dick looks like he's about to have an aneurism.
"Dick let the boy have fun, he's young," Oracles says with a reproaching tone.
"The guy isn't?!?!?! He's clearly too old,” Dick argues.
"What is the age difference between you and Babs?" Tim demands.
"This isn't about us,” Dick refutes.
"3-4 years!" Barbara calls out.
"See, it's not that weird." Tim says nodding to himself.
"You said that you're living together? For how long?" Dick is almost begging to know.
"A little over a year." Tim admits.
"Tim, when is your birthday again?" Dick questions looking at Tim with a crazed look on his face.
"So funny thing, I have multiple depending on the identity and profile,” Tim says trying to sidestep answering the question.
"Tim,” Dick growls.
"2 months ago," Tim very reluctantly admits.
"Tim did this guy barely wait till you were legal? Wait how long have you guys been together?!?!" Dick shrieks starting to pace in front of Tim.
"I plead the fifth," Tim knows his rights and he's not gonna say shit.
"Omg. You’re a victim, my brother is a victim. Tim we can help you, you can get away,” Dick spirals, trying to come up with a plan.
"Dick, I am happy, I didn't even know Danny until after my 18th birthday," Tim says trying to minimize the freak out occurring in front of him.
"What did you do, meet the guy and have him move in the same day you met him?" Dick chokes out.
"…"
"Oh god, did anyone teach you stranger danger?" Dick is beyond spiraling, he might be on a new plane of existence now.
"Consider my childhood and how we met,” Tim says while recalling portions of his life.
"Oh fucking hell, you never had a chance,” Dick mutters.
"Tim why can't I find a single photo of this guy?”Oracle interrupts.
"He's really good at avoiding cameras?"
"Public security cameras. Along with photos of the guy for ids,” Oracle presses further.
"Really good at it?"
"Tim,” Oracle is not impressed.
"Listen, what do we say about forcing people to come out before they're ready."
"You're a bat try again,” Oracle refutes.
"Fine he's a metahuman and cameras short out around him." Tim is not happy to admit this.
"You're dating a meta and no one knows?" Dick interupts a mix of scandalized and excited at knowing a secret no one else does.
"You two do."
"How does Bruce not know?"
"He's not my dad, I didn’t have to tell him."
"Tim," Dick chides.
"What I have the paperwork and the scar to prove it!"
"Tim."
"Fine, Bruce doesn't know I ever have a partner. Only you, Cass, Babs and Jason know."
"Jason?!?!!"
"Yeah he met Danny, thinks he's cool, they talk about books."
Dick is about to go murder Jason for letting Tim be a victim and allowing it to continue.
"Tim I need you to come back with me, we can pack up some of your stuff."
"Dick this is my condo? I paid for it? I'm not leaving."
Dick grabs a hold of Tim's shoulders almost hysterically, "We can get you a new condo, Bruce will do anything to protect you."
Tim shrugs Dick's hands off of him, "Dick I'm fine, honestly."
Before Dick can argue and pull Tim out of the house, a door opens and they both hear ruffling as someone sets stuff down in the entry hallway.
Dick and Tim standing in the living room freeze.
"Starlight? Are you here? Did your brother leave? I know you said he was supplies to leave like a day ago but I know siblings, they cling like barnacles to be annoying," A deep voice calls out.
A figure walks in and Dick is mesmerized. The most beautiful man that Dick has ever seen has just walked in looks around the room, sees Tim and grins. (How did he get more beautiful??? Dick internally wails.) He completely ignores Dick to walk to over to Tim, pulling him into a hug and brushing a kiss against Tim's quite frankly disgusting hair (Tim was 2 days late on washing it.)
"Hey love, how have you been?" The man leans down and presses a kiss to Tim's lips before tucking Tim into his arms. He finally looks up and sees Dick standing there staring in wonder.
"Oh hey, Tim's brother right? I'm Danny," Danny stretches forward and shakes a stupefied Dick's hand.
"You guys having fun? Tim's been kind of quiet and I assumed you guys were busy." Danny states, squeezing Tim in tigher as he mentions him being quiet.
"…How did you guys meet?" Dick asks.
"Oh! I was lost trying to find Gotham University and Tim found me completely confused in a coffee shop. He gave me directions, suggestions and helped me out when my student housing fell through," Danny explains.
"Scarecrow,” Tim mutters under his breath.
"Ah."
"We were fast friends and just fell in together, your brother is persistent," Danny chuckles.
"Oh yeah definitely,” Dick laughs back starting to put pieces together.
"How much longer will you guys be hanging out? Don't let me interrupt you all," Danny says with a gesture.
"Oh I'll be leaving after dinner, actually let me go grab it, my treat!" Dick says in a hurry, already checking to make sure he has his wallet, phone and keys.
"Dick?" Tim questions with a certain look on his face, as though he knows exactly what Dick has just figured out.
"Chinese sound good? Great be back in a half hour to an hour!" Dick runs into the entry hall, tugs his shoes on and runs out the door.
Oracle who had been listening the entire time, makes a humming noise.
"Dick?"
"That was the most beautiful man in the world. I'll send you a photo later."
"Okay?"
"Tim totally stalked this guy and set this while fake meet cute up. Tim also probably wiped the profile of the guy off online so no one could see this guy."
"Dick."
"Honestly I'm not sure if I should try and save Danny from Tim." Dick mutters into the phone, still trying to process everything.
"Are you saying Danny is a victim?"
"Probably?"
But Danny and Tim are just listening to the bug that Tim planted on Dick's jacket ages ago and laughing.
"What so now I'm the victim?" Danny says in wonder at the thought Olympics occurring in Dick's head.
"He needs to make his mind up, he changed his tune so fast from me being the victim,” Tim muses almost insulted.
"I know I was listening and dying."
"And you thought bugs around the house was a bad idea."
"No I said to make them ghost proof."
"Oh yeah."
"Wait who's the victim, you or me? You for being so young and easy to manipulate or me for being stalked, profiled and digitally wiped by you?" Danny asks in a teasing tone.
"Oh love, everyone but us." Tim declares pulling Danny in for a kiss while they both listen to Dick spiral to Babs.