Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Moritz shouldn’t have even been there, to be honest. Ilse told him the sleepover wouldn’t be all-girls, but when he arrived he discovered that the reason it wasn’t all girls was because he, Moritz Stiefel, was there. It wasn’t even that he didn’t want to spend time with his friends, especially since he had seen so little of them while studying for midterms. Honestly, he just felt like he was intruding. He was seeing a different side to them than when they were around the guys, since clearly none of them considered him in that way. Well, that wasn’t entirely true, since Martha was about the same as usual, but other than that they seemed much...freer.

So here he was, lying on Anna’s carpet with his eyes half-shut while the girls were sitting in a circle playing truth or dare. He wanted to play, honest, but he was so tired and the carpet was so soft…

“Ok, Thea, truth or dare?” Ilse said as she braided Wendla’s hair (Moritz was surprised to learn that girls really did braid each others’ hair at sleepovers.)

“Truth.”

“Umm, oh! If you had to marry someone in our school, who would it be?” The rest of the girls started laughing.

“Aww, that one doesn’t count. Everyone knows who Thea wants to marry.” Wendla said. Ilse looked over at Moritz, who shrugged.

“ Melchior Gabor ,” the girls said in a frightening unison.

Melchior Gabor. Moritz had known him since they were kids, when he, Wendla, and Ilse would come over to the Neumanns' house and play pirates after school. Of course, in high school he stopped seeing Melchior as much because Moritz had to focus on studying just to stay in school and Melchior, well, Melchior was busy doing everything. He singlehandedly formed the school’s classics club and then gave up control of that so he could join the debate team (and win the national tournament), then afterwards he played varsity baseball and after that he went on a semester abroad and, well, Moritz had a hard enough time keeping track after that. Moritz missed Melchior, partly because when he was with Melchior his grades skyrocketed (well, skyrocketed for Moritz anyway), and partly because he was just fun to be around. That's why they had been friends for so long.

In seventh grade, Melchior was way ahead of any of their class when it came to, uh, sexual stuff, and he even wrote Moritz an essay to help illuminate some dreams he’d been having. Long story short, the dreams just got worse, but at least Mortiz knew what he was doing when he hooked up with Greta Brandenburg at a party his freshman year.

Moritz couldn’t help seeing Melchior as the same kid he’d known when they were younger. Hell, he still kind of looked the same, with his boyish cheeks and bright eyes. He thought of the way his laugh was loud, like a bell, and yet gentle at the same time.

So this is why, when the girls revealed that Thea longed to marry Melchior Gabor, Moritz couldn’t help but say “who doesn’t?”.

It wasn’t until he felt five pairs of eyes on him that he realized what happened. “Uh, I, it just seems like everyone has a crush on Melchi- Melchior ,” he corrected, feeling all of a sudden guilty for using Melchior’s cutesy childhood nickname.

“When you say everyone, do you mean yourself, Moritz?” Moritz cursed Ilse a thousand times in his head, then took some of those back because she still was a pretty good friend. But fuck that.

“It’s okay if you do, Moritz,” Wendla said softly. Why did she have to be so nice all the time? “There’s nothing wrong with being gay.”

Moritz knew this, of course. He knew that his friends, himself included, were desperately waiting for their Ernst and one Hanschen Rilow to finally discover they were in love and start dating already.

“I’m not gay” was all Moritz could manage to say, though.

“Okay, bisexual, whatever,” Thea rolled her eyes. “Truth or truth, Moritz, do you have a crush on Melchior Gabor?”

He wanted to protest. He wanted to point out that technically she should have let him pick truth or truth before asking the question (although it’s not like that would have fixed anything). He wanted to fake being sick- no, scratch that, he wanted to throw up. But he knew any of the above would paint a big red arrow in the sky pointed at Moritz with the words “Has a crush on Melchior Gabor” on it in flashing lights, so he let his head slump into the carpet and gave in.

“I don’t know.” And that was the truth. He wouldn’t have thought of himself as having a crush on Melchior, but something about the way that his stomach was doing triple-somersaults and how his cheeks were no doubt fire-engine red made it clear to him that, even if it wasn’t a crush per se, he wanted something else from Melchior than just friendship.

“I knew it!” Anna laughed. Moritz looked horrified.

“Did everyone know but me?” Thankfully, his confusion seemed to be shared by the rest of the group.

“What? No- Anna just- well I don’t really know what Anna means, but none of us knew,” Ilse said. “Well…”

“We may have thought you were gay-or, you know, bi,” Thea said. “And by may have I mean definitely knew. But we all had different theories.”

“For the record, I didn’t think he was,” muttered Martha, but she smiled anyway. “I’m happy for you though, Moritz.”

“Theories?” Moritz said, sitting up straight.

“Well, yeah.” Somehow Wendla’s innocent eyes made everything she said more excruciating. “See, we all figured you were, uh,”

“Queer,” Ilse supplied.

“ Queer , and we all had a little too much fun guessing who you might have a crush on. For example, I personally guessed Ernst since you two study together all the time.”

“Only because we’re both nearly failing.”

“Thea thought it was Hanschen,” Ilse blurted out. Moritz scowled. There were many things he’d like to do to Hanschen Rilow, but those kinds of things were not among them. In fact, his favorite fantasy at the moment was of him pushing Hanschen in front of a train.

“Like an enemies-turned-lovers thing! Happens all the time,” Thea defended. “And, for the record, Ilse thought you would be cute with Georg .”

“I said might be !” Ilse screeched. Moritz wished he could die at this point, or that the house would burn down so he would have to stop listening to his friends arguing over whom he hypothetically was dating.

“Enough!” He nearly shouted. Everyone turned to look at him as he said, more quietly, “Does anyone else know?” The girls looked at each other, as no one wanted to talk. Wendla finally answered for them.

“Well, Ernst may have been the one to suggest the idea…”

“And knowing Ernst, he probably mentioned it to Hanschen...” Anna said. She didn’t have to say anything else; everyone knew what that meant. Moritz held his face in his hands.

“So you’re telling me,” he said with slow, precise words, “that everyone in the goddamned school thinks that I like boys?” Martha put a hand on his shoulder.

“It’s not all bad,” she said. “No one knew that you liked Melchior-”

“What does it matter?” Moritz said angrily. He could feel tears forming in the corners of his eyes but god damnit he was allowed to be upset. “The entire school thinks I’m gay. Maybe bi. And so what if I am? I should be the one who gets to know first.” He grabbed his knees. “Does Melchior know?”

“Probably, but who cares?” Thea said, surprisingly blunt. “It’s not like he’s straight as a line, either. And Moritz, darling, you haven’t exactly been subtle about your affection for guys. I’m honestly surprised that you didn’t already know.”

“Honestly? I did, but I didn’t tell anyone because I was trying to figure out for myself, thanks. How long has everyone known?”

“It can’t be more than, I don’t know, five months?” Five months?

“Do you think Anna would have let me bring you over tonight if we thought you were straight?” Five months.

Five months! No wonder everyone had been so strange, from the girls who snickered at him in the hallway (well, more than usual, that is) to the odd look he got from Greta as he refused her invitation to attend a GSA meeting (there had been a reason he and she weren’t an item after that one night). Even his friends had been acting awfully different, like how Ernst oh-so-subtly leaned away from him if he got too close while studying (as if he’d be interested in Ernst. They both knew he was taken). They all thought he was gay!

“Five months!” Moritz wailed out loud, and then everything after that was sort of unintelligible whimpering. The girls all looked at each other in a way that very clearly said ‘oh shit’ with a side of ‘what do we do?’ Suddenly, Ilse had a thought.

“Hey Moritz, baby, I know this is shitty, but there’s a bright side to all of this.”

“There is?” He said, blowing his nose on the tissue Matha had handed him. Ilse nodded and grinned in that way she did when she had a plan.

“Now that we know you’re into Melchior, we can help get you two together?” That didn’t sound to a bright side. In fact, judging by the way that both Martha and Thea were gaping at Ilse in disbelief, he wasn’t alone in thinking this.

See, the last time his friends had tried to get two people together (namely Otto and Marianna), things were, well, catastrophic. That was why everyone agreed to go hands-off when it came to Ernst and Hanschen (although look how well that plan was coming along).

“First of all, I thought we agreed never to try anything like this again,” Moritz said.

“But Moritz, I feel guilty about what we did,” Wendla said as her eyes seemed to grow two sizes and she bore an uncanny resemblance to a puppy. “The least we could do is try to help you. And besides, it would be good for Melchior to have something he can believe in.”

“Fine, I’m in,” said Thea. “It’d be better than having you so sad all the time.” She gave what was almost a genuine smile and everyone else nodded- Moritz was under a lot of pressure, and it showed.

“Well I’m not in,” Moritz said. “If you want to fuck up my friendship, you’re going to have to do it without me.” He hadn’t meant it to come out like that, but he was too busy storming out of the room to care.

Everyone was quiet for a moment.

“So… does that mean we have permission to try and get them together?” Anna said cautiously.

“I think so,” Wendla said proudly. Ilse stood and followed Moritz out of the room. “Hey, where are you going?”

Chapter Text

Since Anna’s house didn’t have a porch, and since Moritz needed some fresh air, he sat all the way on the curb as he fumbled to text his mom to pick him up. That poor boy, Ilse thought as she made her way down to him and sat beside him.

“Hey, Mor, I’m sorry. Are you okay?” She looked at him with genuine concern in her eyes. “I really do care about you, and I don’t want you to have to wait out here alone.” Although it went unspoken, both of them knew why she was there.

About a year before, she had gotten a call from Moritz that she couldn’t really understand, as it was mainly composed of a sort of soft crying. While still on the phone, she ran all the way to the Stiefels’ house and found Moritz sobbing on the floor, holding his father’s pistol. Ilse grabbed it away from him and managed to calm him down until he revealed that he was failing two of his classes.

For the months after that, no one could have pried her away from him. She dragged him to her counseling sessions and personally made sure one of their friends checked in with him every night so that he could never become so isolated, but every time he got a paper or a test back in class, she was terrified that she wouldn’t see him the next day. And now that he knew... this , she was afraid to send him home alone.

“I’ll be fine, Ilse,” he said, then after a pause “but thanks anyway.”

“No problem.” Moritz’s phone buzzed and he looked at the screen.

“She’ll be here in a few minutes.”

“Did you really not know you had feelings for Melchior?” Ugh. This subject again. Moritz sighed.

“I guess this makes sense, now that I hear it out loud.” He forced a laugh. “Maybe he’s why I haven’t been able to connect with anyone else. I’m waiting for him.”

“Moritz, if you really don’t think you’re into him, it’s okay. I don’t want us pushing you two together when you didn’t really mean it.”

“No, I really do think- what do you mean pushing us together ?” Ilse turned her head to look at the sidewalk. “Ilse,” he said as calmly as he could manage. “What exactly is going on in Anna’s room?”

“Why not? It’s the perfect plan.”

“Anna, name one time in real life where locking two people in a closet together has ever worked?”

“Besides,” Wendla admitted, “knowing Melchior they wouldn’t be in there for very long. I’m pretty sure he always has two sets of lock picks on him. Two!”

“Wendla’s right,” Martha agreed. “Plus isn’t locking them in a closet together a little on the nose?”

“Well, if someone has a better idea, let’s hear it.”

“Maybe we need to start small,” Wendla said, tapping her chin. “Set them up on a study date.” Thea groaned. “What?”

“That’s how they already spend time. Nothing would change. I  say we bring in reinforcements.”

“Like who? Moritz will be able to tell if we bring the boys in.”

“Maybe, but he didn’t even realize he was crushing on Melchi Gabor until we told him. That boy is so caught up in his own problems that he probably wouldn’t see what was happening even if we did lock him in a closet.”

“Okay, fine, we can tell the boys. But it has to be in person, I don’t want to risk Melchior seeing any texts.”

“Fine. What do we do in the meantime?”

“Honestly, I couldn’t tell you. But it’ll be fine; I’ll make sure things don’t get too out of hand.”

“Promise?” Moritz said, and Ilse nodded.

“You’re sure you’re going to be okay tonight? You can still stay over if you want.”

“My mom’s already coming. Plus, I don’t want to go back in there after my big dramatic walkout.” Moritz sighed and lowered his head, just to jolt back up a second later. “Oh, shit.”

“What is it?” Moritz waved his hand, as if to dismiss the thought.

“I left my bag inside.”

“I’ll go get it for you. You shouldn’t have to face them again tonight.”

“You’re the best friend a guy could ask for.”

“Yeah, yeah,” she said, standing up. “Maybe that’ll mean something if you say it around Melchior.”

“He is pretty amazing. But what do I do?” But his words hit empty night, as Ilse had already gone inside. He stared down at his feet. Maybe it wasn’t so bad that his friends knew. After all, as far as secrets went, his wasn’t nearly the worst. And maybe admitting that he had a- that he liked Melchior was the first step to getting over him.

He heard Ilse’s footsteps and felt her plunk down next to him.

“Ilse, hypothetically speaking, what would you do if you had a crush on a guy?” Ilse chuckled.

“You don’t want to know.” He glared at her. “Alright, fine. If I had a crush on a guy, I’d try to spend time with him. Show him that I care about him more than a friend would. I’d-” She was interrupted by the big black car that pulled up in front of them, mere inches from Moritz’s feet.

“I guess I’d better go. See you tomorrow.” He stood up and slung his overnight bag over one shoulder.

“Promise?”

“Yeah,” he smiled at her, “I promise.

It was only when he got into the passenger seat that he realized his father was the one driving, and his mood plummeted 20 stories.

“Do you have any idea what time it is?”

“Thank you for picking me up,” Moritz said in monotone as he stared at the glove compartment while they pulled away from Anna’s house.

“Your mother insisted.” Moritz did his best to save face, but on the inside he scowled. If this was another of his mother’s attempts to bring him and his father closer together, it was failing miserably. “Was that the Neumann girl?”

“Ilse.” Her name came out as barely a whisper. His father made a huffing noise.

“Her father really is a deplorable man,” for a moment Moritz was shocked that he agreed with his father on something until he continued- “are you sure you should be spending time with that- wayward daughter of his?”

“Ilse and I have been friends for as long as I can remember, and she’s one of the best souls I know.” His father made a noise that could have been a laugh, if he was capable of such a thing. To Moritz’s luck, they had just pulled into the Stiefels’ driveway. “Goodnight, father.”

“I’d say see you tomorrow, but it’s already well into the hours of the morning,” he grumbled as he got out of the car. Moritz didn’t feel like protesting that it was only 1 A.M., or that his parents were usually still up anyway. He just held his tongue and made his way up the stairs.

Moritz didn’t even bother to turn the lights on as he collapsed on his bed, pausing only to plug his phone in. He managed to smile a little when he saw a text from Ilse saying sweet dreams, followed by a kissy face emoji. He kicked off his shoes and then rolled under his covers, all set to drift off into sleep and forget about all this, for a few hours at least.

Chapter Text

Getting eight people together to talk about two other people may have sounded easy, but it was especially difficult considering A. they had to do it without Melchior Gabor (the nosiest motherfucker on the planet) finding out, B. they had to make sure that the second-nosiest person in the world (and Moritz’s number two least favorite person, right behind his dad), Hanschen Rilow didn’t find out (which was made especially difficult by the fact that Anna decided to invite Ernst, his other half), and C.- well, there really was no C, but A. and B. were bad enough as it was.

Lucky for them, Georg (who even invited Georg?) offered for them all to meet in his basement. Normally, not one of them would want to ever go to Georg’s basement, but desperate times called for desperate measures. Surprisingly, the basement seemed to have been decorated by Georg’s mother and was actually a reasonably nice sitting room. The other nice thing about Georg’s house is that they didn’t have to worry about any of their friends making an unexpected visit.

“So,” Otto said when everyone had finally arrived. “Would someone mind telling me what the hell we’re all doing in Georg’s basement?”

“Don’t thank me all at once,” Georg said sarcastically.

“First of all, you all can’t tell anyone or I will personally pull your throats out through your necks.” Everyone looked a little terrified and Wendla’s threat, except Ilse, who grinned. “We’re here,” she continued, “because two of our friends need our help.” The boys glanced around. Ernst was there, so this couldn’t be about the thing with him and Hanschen…

“Moritz is in love with Melchior.” Thea said before anyone could stop her. Otto and Georg burst out laughing, while Ernst smiled.

“Oh thank god,” he said, then froze when he saw the confused faces of his friends. “I just mean I’m glad it’s, uh, one of our friends, and not…”

“Not who?”

“When we found out Moritz was into guys, Ernst was worried it was him,” Otto teased.

“That is not true!” Ernst protested. “And I hardly need to remind you that I was the one who figured out he liked guys in the first place. Speaking of which, how did you find out? You know, about Melchior?”

“We were playing truth or dare last night when he told us,” said Anna.

“Last night? How come I wasn’t invited?” Georg pouted. Ilse sighed.

“Normally we wouldn’t have invited any of you, but Moritz hasn’t been himself lately. Which is another reason that I agreed to come here at all. I think having Melchior in his life would really help him.” The girls all nodded.

“But still, Melchior?” Otto said. “It’s not like this is the first time someone’s had a crush on him. I say our efforts are better spent trying to help Moritz get over him.” Otto did have a point. Melchior was frequently asked out, and very rarely did anything last beyond a first date (if you could call it that).

“True, it’s not like we can make Melchior fall in love with him,” Ernst said.

“There’s not much that you can make Melchior Gabor do,” Wendla sighed.

“But that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t try,” Ilse said. All the girls looked at her, confused, especially since last night, when she came back inside, she did her best to dissuade them from meddling. “This is Moritz we’re talking about. And if Melchior does have feelings for him, you know Moritz will never figure that out on his own.” Everyone nodded.

“Well, okay, but first we have to find out if Melchior even thinks of Moritz that way. There’s no use in trying something futile, especially since Melchior is involved.”

“What did you have in mind?”

It was a rare Sunday when Moritz Stiefel didn’t have to go to church. Lucky for him, today was one of those rare days. His father had to go on a work trip out of town (Moritz knew this because he had been grumbling for weeks about the ‘godless heathens’ that ran the bank), and since there was no one to wake him up, Moritz could sleep as much as he liked.

The main problem with more sleep, however, was that more sleep meant more dreams. These were the kinds of dreams Moritz hadn’t had in years, the kind that left him startling awake and sweating. Today, though, he bolted upright with a name perched on his lips. Melchior . Usually, when he had these kinds of dreams, there was only one person he could call, so he already had the phone up to his ear before he realized who might pick up on the other end.

“Hello? Moritz?” He almost passed out right then, his heart was beating so quickly. “Is anyone there?” He heard that oh-so-familiar laugh, the same laugh that dream-Melchior had before he- “Helloo?”

Focus, Moritz , he told himself. Ilse had told him just to show Melchior that he cared about him, and dialing someone without talking to them was definitely the opposite of that.

“Hey Melchior,” he found himself breathing into the microphone.

“Moritz! I thought maybe you’d dialed me by accident. What’s going on?” Be cool, Moritz. He doesn’t need to know what happened last night.

“I was just wondering, uh,” Think think THINK! Moritz anxiously scanned the room before he had an idea. “I was wondering if you could help me with some biology. I mean- the biology homework.” He was honestly proud of himself for coming up with an excuse so quickly. And, truth be told, he really did need help.

“Of course! Are you free this afternoon? Maybe you could come over to my place…”

“Yeah! Sure, that sounds great. Uh, can I come by around two?”

“See you then.”

“Same. I mean, you too.” Moritz hung up before he could embarrass himself anymore and slumped back down on his bed.

Melchior was sitting on the back porch thinking. And waiting for Moritz. Neither of those activities was new to him. He smiled as he thought of the countless times his friend had burst through the door, breathless, only to realize that he’d forgotten his bag or something else at home. Melchior took a drag on his cigarette and blew the smoke out slowly. He’d never admit it, but it made him feel cool . Not that he cared what anyone else thought, obviously.

“Melchior,” his mother said as she poked her head out the back door. “Moritz is here to see you.”

“Tell him to come back here, ma.” Moments later, one Moritz Stiefel was out on his back porch. And coughing. “Oh, shit, I can stop if you want,” Melchior offered.

“No, it’s fine, it’s just… been awhile.” Moritz sat down next to Melchior and accepted the cigarette that Melchior held out to him. Melchior looked at his watch and laughed.

“You said you’d be here an hour ago. Did you fall back asleep?” Moritz nodded.

“I ran over here as fast as I could.” Melchior grinned.

“Just like old times.” They sat on the porch in silence for a bit, occasionally passing the cigarette between them. However, Melchior Gabor was not one to sit in silence for long. “You said you needed help with biology homework?”

“Uh, yeah,” Moritz said sheepishly as he pulled his notebook out of his bag. “I’m doing my best, but I start looking at the problems and my head goes all fuzzy.” Melchior scowled.

“I blame it on the system. I mean, how do they expect us to learn anything when they’re so focused on making us memorize facts? If they took a more application-based approach, students could learn skills like critical thought and problem-solving instead of how to, I don’t know, memorize the different parts of the brain .” He laughed bitterly. “Do they realize how ironic it is to teach us about the brain without letting us use ours?”

“I’m sure that would be better, but this system is the one I’m failing in, and as much as we’d all like to change that, I’d rather start with being able to pass my bio tests.” Melchior looked at him with wide eyes.

“Sorry,” he said earnestly. “I hadn’t thought about that.” What? Moritz brought up something that Melchior hadn’t thought about? Impossible.

“Yeah, well,” Moritz said, desperate to keep Melchior’s attention. “Sometimes you need to realize that even though you’re good at this ‘mindless work’”-that was a direct Melchior quote-  ”Some of us would rather keep our heads down and make it through the semester than rock the boat, like you.”

“Point taken. So, how about we take a look at those problems?”

Honestly, Moritz couldn’t tell which made studying harder: the material, or the fact that Melchior Gabor was pressed up next to him, helping. And honestly, Melchior’s way of explaining did make things clearer despite every time that Melchior reached across his body to point something out or laughed at a problem, only to see Moritz’s worried look and go on to explain what was going on. What Moritz also realized was that having a crush was very different from knowing you had a crush. After all, when he was younger, he and Melchior were practically inseparable, so much so that there was that one year where everyone called them Melchioritz to save time. They could have been sitting with no room between them and Moritz would have just felt happy in his friendship. Now that he knew what he felt was a crush, everything Melchior did was a thousand times more noticeable. Moritz had to consciously keep himself from freaking out because they was so close that Melchior would have been able to hear his heart pounding in his chest.

About halfway through, Moritz stomach roared, interrupting Melchior mid-sentence, who laughed.

“Slept through lunch, eh? Why didn’t you tell me?” Melchior got up and Moritz followed him into the kitchen, where Fanny Gabor was already making sandwiches.

“Is your mother a psychic?” Moritz whispered while Melchior tried to hold back a laugh.

“Hello boys! You’re just in time.”

“I’ve already had lunch, ma,” Melchior protested, rolling his eyes.

“I haven’t. Thank you, Mrs. Gabor.” She laughed.

“Fanny is fine, Moritz. As for you, Melchi, you’re a growing boy, I’m sure you can’t say no to one sandwich.” Melchior sighed and accepted it, while Moritz was already digging in. “I’ll be upstairs if you need me.”

After she left, Moritz turned to Melchior. “Your mom is the best.”

“You don’t have to live with her,” Melchior grumbled, but he couldn’t hide his smile.

“Thanks again for helping me with the bio,” Moritz said as he finished off the first half of his sandwich. “You’re really good at helping me understand.”

“It’s nothing.”

“No, I mean it. I’m so confused all the time; it’s nice to have a little clarity.”

“Moritz, you know I can help you whenever you need it. Just let me know.”

“You mean it?” Melchior nodded. Moritz looked over at his half-eaten sandwich. “Are you gonna finish that?”

Moritz was willing to trade all the sandwiches in the world for the laugh Melchior responded with.

Moritz steadies himself before he opens the front door. When someone comes knocking at this hour, he knows who it is before he even lets them in. This could be good or bad, depending on whether she’s crying or not.

He pulls open the door and barely manages a “hey Ilse” before she falls over into his arms. She’s shaking. Bad sign.

“Can I stay tonight?” She asks softly. Moritz closes the door behind her and helps her up the stairs.

After Ilse comes out of the bathroom, she plops down next to where Moritz is sitting on the floor, waiting for her.

“Where’s your homework?” She asks. Moritz knows not to question Ilse about what happened; she would tell him when she was ready.

“I finished, if you can believe it.”

“I’m so proud!” She leaned in to hug him, and then stopped short. “Moritz...have you been smoking?” He shrugged.

“A little bit.” But Moritz doesn’t smoke, Ilse thought. Only…

“Tell me everything.” She commanded.

“Ilse, I don’t-”

“Yes you do. The finished homework, the smoke. You saw Melchi Gabor today!” She practically squaled as he tried not to smile as big as he wanted to.

“We’re friends, Ilse. I needed help studying, and he invited me over.”

“He invited you over! I can’t wait to tell Wend-” Moritz grabbed her arm.

“No, please, Ilse. I’m not ready for them to know.”

“But you already told her-”

“That I like him. That’s different. I just- I want to do this by myself Ilse. I don’t want any of them to “help”,” he made air quotes with his fingers that indicated that his friends’ “help” was anything but. Ilse’s stomach twisted with guilt.

“Okay fine. We won’t talk about Melchior.” Ilse sighed and relaxed her head into Moritz’s shoulder. They’d been friends forever, so affection like this was commonplace.

After a while, Ilse finally spoke. “My mom wasn’t home tonight.” Moritz waited for Ilse to continue at her own pace. “She has the late shift this week, but I guess my-” she stopped herself- “I guess Mr. Neumann had a few too many drinks tonight. I heard him stumbling around downstairs, calling out my name.” She was shaking now, just like when she first came inside. “So I climbed out the window and ran here.” She looked up at him with worried eyes. “What am I going to do tomorrow?”

Moritz wrapped his arm tighter around his friend. “Have you told your mom?” Ilse shook her head.

“I don’t want to break her heart. Besides, if he’s not there to support her, I don’t know where we’d be.” Moritz nodded.

“You should tell her, but it doesn’t have to be tomorrow.” Moritz yawned. “You can stay here whenever you need to, though.”

“You’re the best friend a girl could ever want, Moritz Stiefel.” But Moritz didn’t respond because he was already passed out on her shoulder. She laughed quietly. “Now it’s my turn to be a good friend,” she said as she hoisted him onto his bed and set an alarm for tomorrow.

Chapter Text

On Monday morning, a miracle happened. There was a pop quiz in Moritz’s last period biology class. Well, that wasn’t the miracle. The miracle was that Moritz knew the answer to every single question and finished two minutes before time was called. That never happened. Usually Moritz spent his pop quizzes sweating nervously and hoping he’d somehow remember answers that he’d never learned. But today he understood.

His other classmates seemed to notice, as he could feel their eyes on him when he walked up to turn in the paper. Moritz Stiefel never finished before time. Moritz Stiefel never finished .

Most of the gazes from his classmates were those of awe, but there was one person staring at him with a look on his face like he’d just swallowed an entire lemon. And that same person followed Moritz to his locker.

“What are you up to?” Hanschen Rilow nearly spat in his face when he turned around.

“What do you mean?” Moritz did his best to stay calm; this sycophant (and yes, Moritz knew what sycophant meant) was not about to ruin his high.

“You finished that quiz with time to spare. I could see how shocked the teacher was when she was grading your paper, which means you got the answers right . So how did you do it?”

“Maybe I just studied more. What’s it to you?” Hanschen smirked.

“Well, if it turns out you’re getting your answers from someone else, then it is my obligation to report you. For the good of the class, who actually work for their grades.” Moritz was shocked. Hanschen thought he was cheating ?

“I’m not cheating, okay? Besides, you’ve said it before, I don’t have the brains to get the answers right even if they were in front of me.” Moritz slammed his locker door shut and stormed down the hallway.

Hanschen scowled. Maybe Moritz wasn’t cheating, but still, no one goes from that hopeless to that confident without something happening. And Hanschen Rilow didn't like mysteries. So Hanschen Rilow was going to find out what that something was, even if it killed him. Well, first he had to practice violin, but then he was going to find out.

As if his day couldn’t get any better (and by now Moritz didn’t know if he meant that sarcastically or not), who should he see waiting outside but Melchior Gabor, ranting passionately to Thea. Even though she’d been crushing on him for years, her eyes seemed glazed over and she nodded absentmindedly to whatever Melchior was saying. As Moritz got closer, he could make out the words.

“Not to mention how everything we do is so inherently gendered that if someone so much as wears the “wrong” color, they could get shamed for it!” At least Melchior was cute when he ranted, with his flushed cheeks and wildly gesturing hands. Thea noticed Moritz and waved him over, interrupting Melchior.

“Moritz!” He hated that Thea smiled at him as if she knew a secret of his (which she did, but that was beside the point), and he hoped he wasn’t blushing too hard when she wiggled her eyebrows suggestively behind Melchior’s back.

“Hey! How’s it going?” Well done, Stiefel, Moritz thought. That could have been a lot worse .

“I’ve got to go, my mom’s here,” Thea said. “I’ll see you two later.” Traitor.

“Are you walking home?”

“Yeah,” Moritz said.

“Great, we can walk together.”

Moritz and Melchior lived nearby, but they hadn’t walked home together since, well, probably middle school. With Melchior’s countless activities, Moritz never had the chance to walk with him.

“So, how was class today?” Melchior rolled his eyes and Moritz internally kicked himself for asking such a stupid question.

“The same as always.” Sensing that Melchior was about to go into another rant about the school system, Moritz quickly responded.

“Remember how you helped me with bio yesterday?” Melchior nodded. “Well, we had a pop quiz, and I’ve never been more confident in my life!”

“Moritz, that’s amazing!”

“Yeah, Hanschen even thought I was cheating or something.” Melchior snorted.

“He’s always been the jealous type. One threat to his status of best in the class and all of a sudden he’s up in arms.” Moritz looked down at his feet.

“He won’t have to be jealous for long; it was only one quiz.”

“Wait, Moritz, do you think that was the only time I’d be willing to help you out?” Melchior stopped mid-stride to look Moritz in the eyes. Wow, those are some blue eyes . Moritz shrugged.

“I don’t want you to have to waste all your time helping me-” Melchior’s laugh cut him off.

“Please. I have to waste my time doing schoolwork anyway; I might as well use that time to help someone I care about.” Moritz decided not to address the ‘someone I care about’ part because he feared that doing so would be too obvious. “You can come over this afternoon, even.”

“Sure!” Moritz said, a little too enthusiastically. “Let me just text my mom…”

STUDY BUDDIES 2K16

Otto: for the record this is a dumb group name :P

Otto: and /totally/ not suspicious at all

Ilse: how about u come up with something better

Wendla: ok guys focus

Wendla: thea, how did it go today?

Thea: >:( i hate you all for making me do this

Thea: he just ranted at me! i couldnt get a word in

Thea: buuut

Thea: i did see him walking moritz home as i was leaving

Wendla: !!!!!

Anna: we’re supposed to be using code names remember?

Thea: w/e

Thea: why is there no eye roll emoki

Thea: emoji damnit

Anna: ok so you didnt get any information out of BOB but you did see him walk JOHN home?

Martha: i thought melchior was john? :?

Ilse: the codenames arent important

Ilse: but yeah melchior is john and moritz is bob

Anna: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Georg: how did u even do that

Ernst: hey guys!

Wendla: hi ernst :)

Ilse: so plan a failed

Ilse: kinda

Ilse: what do we do now?

Ernst: i think Wendy’s should talk to john

Ernst: *wendla oops

Marta: john melchior or john moritz

Ernst: john melchior

Wendla: y me?

Ernst: idk it seems like u know him the best

Anna: ^^

Ilse: plus doesnt he always talk about feelings with you

Wendla: ok ill try and talk 2 him

Ilse: :D

Georg: hey does anyone have an xtra copy of Hamlet i could borrow? i left mine in my locker

Anna: dude. Shakespeare is all online

Martha: ^^

Thea: hey could we not use this chat for extra stuff? yall are blowing up my phone

Otto: same

Ilse: u kno you can put conversations on do not disturb...

Moritz felt like skipping all the way home and honestly, if it wasn’t still light out, he would have. All his homework was done, he’d just spent over two hours with Melchior, and he had an invitation to come by tomorrow afternoon. Moritz was a balloon, soaring over the houses he passed on his way back home. Even better, his father was still out of town. When he got home, he dropped his bag off and went into the living room.

“Moritz, you’re supposed to finish your work before you play video games. You know that.”

“I already did, mom. Melchior Gabor helped me.” His mother looked pleasantly surprised.

“Well isn’t that nice! I was wondering what you were up to this afternoon.” Moritz nodded.

“He’s really helpful at explaining the concepts.”

“I’m glad that you had such a productive time. Won’t you tell his mother hello for me the next time you see her?” Moritz nodded a yes. “Then I’ll leave you too it.”

For the first time in what felt like forever, Moritz Stiefel went to bed without worrying that he wouldn’t be able to turn something in tomorrow.

Chapter Text

When Ilse knocked on the Stiefels’ door, she was not expecting to see Moritz when it opened.

“Moritz! What are you doing here?” He looked confused.

“Well, this is my house-”

“I mean what are you doing awake already?”

“I set an alarm.”

“I thought I was your alarm.” He rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly.

“Yeah, but I thought this might be a nice change. Besides-”

“Moritz,” his mother called from the kitchen. “Either go out or stay in, don’t just leave the door open like that.”

“Yes mom,” he called, grabbing his backpack and following Ilse out onto the front steps.

“What were you saying?”

“Oh yeah,” Moritz remembered as they made their way down to the sidewalk. “I learned that getting a consistent amount of sleep, rather than getting as much sleep as possible, can actually make you less tired.”

“Really? And where did you learn this?” Ilse smirked. Moritz didn’t necessarily want to hide the fact that he’d seen Melchior again, but it’s not like Ilse needed to know either. So he told the truth.

“I read it in my biology textbook.” If Ilse had any suspicions about that, she didn’t voice them. However, Moritz couldn’t worry about that for long, since they heard loud footsteps slapping the pavement behind them, almost like someone was running-

“Hey,” Melchior said, out of breath, but his heart can’t be beating faster than Moritz’s right now because god damn. What was it about when Melchior’s cheeks got flushed like that? Moritz forwent a greeting and basically just stared until Ilse, bless her, cut in.

“Hey Melchior! Moritz here was just telling me about how he’s trying to adjust his sleep cycle.” I take back the blessing. Curse her. Fortunately, Melchior looked amused.

“Really?” He said, as if he had no part in teaching Moritz this just yesterday. “Well, let me know how that works out.” Moritz forced himself to smile. Look normal! “I was surprised to see you guys walk by my house this early.” Ilse shrugged.

“I was surprised that Moritz was awake this early,” she said.

“Yeah, you know me,” Moritz said before he could stop himself. “Always sleeping.” Moritz regretted it in the split second before both Melchior and Ilse burst out laughing, and he couldn’t help but laugh as well.

Luckily the walk to school was relatively short, so Moritz managed to keep his cool the whole time. Barely. Why was he able to spend hours at a time studying with Melchior but he could barely talk when they were just walking? He guessed he was so focused on the material when they did homework that he couldn’t afford to pay attention to anything else. Take the work away, and he was left stranded and unprepared to talk to Melchior. He would have to get over this if he ever wanted a shot at hanging out like normal...friends. Yeah, friends. If he thought about that other thing he’d like Melchior to be, he was afraid he’d turn bright red wherever he was.

When they got to school, Ilse spotted Wendla and dashed off with some excuse about an English project. Moritz knew there was no English project, but he couldn’t exactly say that in front of Melchior.

“Do you think there’s something there?” Melchior mused as he watched Ilse jog away.

“Something where?” He gestured with his chin. God, that chin. Moritz hadn’t known chins were so important until this one.

“Ilse and Wendla.”

“I don’t know; I’ve never thought about it.”

“But just look at how close they are.” It was true, the girls were practically pressed together, discussing something quietly. “It makes sense, they’ve known each other forever.” As long as I’ve known you , Moritz thought.

“Huh,” was all he said. Melchior turned to Moritz.

“So, same time today? We’ll meet after school?”

“Uh, yes.” Moritz said. “Thanks again, Melchi, you’re really a lifesaver.” If Melchior noticed the nickname, he didn’t let on.

“You don’t have to thank me every time,” he laughed. “I’ll see you after class.” And with that, he walked away, but not before patting Moritz on the shoulder. And Moritz died right then and there. I’m never washing this jacket again . Okay, it’s not like he’d ever washed it before, but still.

Hanschen was definitely not spying. After all, lots of people went to the library during lunch break. For example, Moritz and Ernst went twice a week to study. And the fact that Hanschen got there early wasn’t because he was sneaky, it was because he was studious . And he was sitting in the desk behind the bookshelf because he needed a quiet space to work. Totally normal. Totally not spying. So what if he just happened to hear the conversation going on next to him?

He shouldn’t have been surprised, though, that they spent the first twenty minutes of their study session, well, studying. He tried to stay alert so he could hear if they were changing topics, but come on, they were quizzing each other on Latin conjugations. Just as he was beginning to regret coming to the library (again, not spying), he heard Ernst speak.

“You have math next period, right? Were there any problems you didn’t finish on the worksheet?”

“You’re never going to believe this, but no.”

“That’s awesome! But I thought you were having trouble with this unit?”

“Well, I was, but Melchior gave me some tips yesterday that really helped.” Melchior? Why was Melchior helping Moritz with his homework? Ernst coughed.

“Really?” Ernst’s voice was higher-pitched than usual. That was also odd.

“Yeah. It really helped to have someone sit down and explain how the problem worked instead of just asking for formulas. Like, I’m still having trouble, but at least I know why.”

“When did you talk to Melchior?” Pause.

“Uh, yesterday.” Hanschen wanted to turn around and see what faces they were making, but he forced himself to stare at the wall.

“That’s really great that he helped you, though.”

“Yeah, I guess. So did you have any problems with the math?” They spent the rest of the period going over homework, and when the bell rang Hanschen had more questions than answers.

It was clear that Melchior Gabor had something to do with Moritz’s recent successes, but from the way both Moritz and Ernst had talked about him, something more than just studying was going on. Luckily, Tuesday meant that Hanschen and Ernst had the same last period class (orchestra), so he’d be able to get answers from his friend then.

“You sounded really good today in rehearsal,” Ernst heard from behind him as he put away his viola.

“Thanks, Hanschen,” he said without turning around. If he didn’t look into the other boy’s face, he might be able to keep from blushing. “But it’s not like you can hear the viola part anyway.”

“Honestly, Ernst, you’re so talented. Why do you play a rhythm instrument?” Breathe in and out, Ernst; don’t focus on the fact that he just called you talented. Ernst finally turned around and faced Hanschen. And those blue eyes.

“I guess I like how the viola sounds so much, I never really cared how important it was.” Oh my god, Hanschen thought, that is the most precious reason ever.

Focus, Hanschen .

“I-” Just then, he was cut off by a message tone. Ernst took out his phone, and Hanschen couldn’t help but see the lock screen:

STUDY BUDDIES 2K16:

Wendla: john says i can c…

“Who’s John?” Hanschen found himself saying. Ernst squeaked. God, he’s cute when he’s nervous.

Hanschen you’re not supposed to think that’s cute. You’re supposed to think that’s suspicious.

Well why can’t it be both?

“It’s a codename, actually.”

“A codename?” Hanschen raised an eyebrow. “For whom?”

“It’s a secret,” Ernst smirked. Two could play at this game. He started to walk up the stairs towards the main hallway.

“Come on, you never keep secrets from me.” Ernst almost laughed out loud. If only he knew how wrong he was!

“That’s not true. I bet you don’t even know my favorite movie.” He walked over to the rack where he kept his bike and started unchaining it.

“If I guess right, will you tell me who John is?” It’s not like he’s going to get it right, anyway.

“Sure.”

“Well,” Hanschen said, tapping his chin. “It’s tricky because you tell everyone that your favorite movie is Brazil because it makes you seem cultured.” Brazil was actually one of the creepiest movies Hanschen had ever seen, but since Ernst had talked through the whole thing, it hadn’t been so bad. Although he still sometimes had baby head-related nightmares. Not that he’d ever tell anyone that. “ But , if you had to pick a favorite, you’d pick the Princess Bride, wouldn’t you?” It was a leap of faith, since he and Ernst had only watched it once together (and Hanschen was the one who picked it), but the way that Ernst had laughed at all the jokes and mouthed the lines (even the ones that weren’t iconic) clued Hanschen in. And, judging by the way Ernst was blushing-

“How did you know?”

“We’re friends, Ernst. You think I don’t know your favorite movie?” After all, Ernst knew his (March of the Penguins, although if anyone ever asked he’d deny it). “So, since I won, who’s John?” Ernst looked at his feet.

“I really shouldn’t be telling you this, but it’s Melchior.” Melchior? No wonder Ernst had acted strangely when Moritz mentioned him earlier. But still-

“Why do you need a codename for Melchior?” Ernst sighed.

“Promise you won’t tell anyone?” Hanschen nodded.

“Cross my heart.” And cross my fingers. As much as Hanschen respected Ernst, he couldn’t guarantee that he would never reveal a bit of juicy gossip. Or, at the very least, use it for blackmailing purposes.

“Okay, fine.” Ernst took a deep breath, looking around to see if anyone was nearby (no one was, of course, since everyone had already gone home). “Moritz has a crush on Melchior, and we’re trying to set them up.”

“So Moritz really is gay?” Hanschen knew he shouldn’t laugh, but come on. Moritz Stiefel, the kid with the worst grades in the school, was crushing on Melchior Gabor , who basically had people throwing themselves at him (and to be fair, it wasn’t like Hanschen hadn’t considered it once or twice…)

“I think he’s bi, but that doesn’t really matter. The point is, before we even try to set them up, we need to find out whether Melchior even likes Moritz in the same way.” Hanschen almost felt bad for Moritz. As passionate as Melchior was, he was hardly known to have lasting relationships. “But I’m not even supposed to know so if you tell anyone they’ll know I told you and I don’t want Moritz to feel any more embarrassed than he already must. Do you remember how awkward you felt when you realized you were bi?” Hanschen shrugged.

“It was actually pretty freeing. But I’ll respect your wishes; I won’t tell anyone.” Yet. Ernst sighed in relief.

“Honestly, even though a bunch of us are in on it, it feels good to get that off my chest.”

“That’s what I’m here for.” Ernst fastened on his helmet.

“See you tomorrow!” He called as he pedaled away. Hanschen took a moment to admire the view.

So. Moritz Stiefel was in love with Melchior. Good to know, Hanschen thought. Good to know.

STUDY BUDDIES 2K16

Wendla: john says i can come over later!

Wendla: I’ll upd8 u guys tonight

Ilse: you should have been there this morning

Ilse: john walked bob and me to school

Martha: :3c

Anna: thats so cute!!!

Martha: the :3c or the fact that they walked to school together?

Anna: both tbh

Otto: ok but technically he could have been walking for isle

Otto: that doesnt mean anything

Wendla: ur just jealous :P

Otto: of?

Ernst: bob told me that john was giving him study tips :D

Otto: how romantic :/

Ilse: if youre going to be negative i will remove you from this group chat

Otto: you wouldnt

Anna: i wouldnt test her

Ilse: im not going to remove you

Ilse: but i could

Ilse: ◉_◉

Georg: again how did u do that

Chapter Text

“Wendla! Melchior didn’t tell me you were coming over,” Mrs. Gabor said when she opened the door. “Melchior!” She called up the stairs. “Wendla is here to see you!” A garbled response came back down. “You’d better go on up; he’s had a long day.”

Wendla thanked Mrs. Gabor and made her way up the stairs to the first door on the right.

“Melchior?” She said as she pushed the door open. “Are you okay?” He was lying face-up on his bed, with his eyes open and staring at the ceiling. Wendla made her way across the maze of books on the floor and sat at his desk chair. He sat up.

“How long have we known each other?”

“Is that a trick question?” Melchior didn’t respond. “Seriously, is everything okay?”

“Twelve years,” he said. Wendla could see that he was going somewhere with this. “And in all the time you’ve known me, have I ever been subtle? In general?”

“Are you asking me this because someone told you you weren’t subtle, or because someone told you you were?” Melchior scowled. “Okay, fine. From what I’ve personally seen, you’re usually very direct and obvious about what you want. Happy?”

“No,” Melchior moaned, flopping down onto the bed again. “If I’m not being subtle, that means he’s just ignoring me.”

“He?”

“I mean,” Melchior continued as if he hadn’t heard her, “what am I doing wrong? I’ve had him over three times now. Three times! And I’m listening to what he says, and he’s laughing at my jokes, and I even told him that he’s someone I care about!”

“Who?!” Melchior looked at her and sighed.

“ Moritz .” Wendla tried to keep her face from showing the whirlwind of emotions she felt inside.

“Wait, so you’re saying…”

“Yeah, laugh all you want. Melchior Gabor has a crush on Moritz Stiefel.” Melchior sighed. “He’s probably straight after all. No wonder he gets so nervous when I talk to him. He’s just too polite to say anything.”

“Melchior, you’re the smartest guy I know, but you are an idiot .” Melchior sighed dramatically.

“I kn-”

“Let me finish! First of all, we’ve both known Moritz for what, twelve years? You know as well as I do that he is a wonderful, caring person, but he’s just as dense as you are.”

“Huh?”

“He won’t know how you feel about him unless you tell him . Just like you can’t tell the difference between fear and friendship.”

“If we’re friends, why is he so scared of me?”

“Have you ever considered that maybe he likes you?”

“Well, no, but-”

“ Melchior. You and Moritz are friends. Even if he doesn’t like you that way,” which he totally does, “telling him how you feel can’t hurt. And if he’s not willing to work past that with you, then, maybe he’s not someone you want to be friends with after all.” I’m so sorry Moritz!

“But what if I don’t want to lose him?” Wendla put on a comforting smile.

“You have to decide for yourself whether you’d rather stay friends or become something more. I don’t have all the answers.”

“Can’t you scope him out or something? You know, find out for sure if he likes me?”

“Can you imagine how that would feel for Moritz? One day he tells Wendla that he has a crush on Melchior, and the next Melchior asks him out?”

“I guess you’re right.”

“Of course I am.” Melchior had a thought.

“So, why did you want to come over in the first place? Sorry, I made this all about me…” Wendla, no, think!

“Uh, I wanted to ask for your advice.” Melchior smirked.

“So the tables have turned. What about?” Wendla regretted getting into this, but she was going to have to take one for the team.

“I have a crush on a girl.”

“Let me guess. Ilse?” Wendla’s heart legitimately stopped beating.

“How did you know that?”

STUDY BUDDIES 2K16

Wendla: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thea: ?

Wendla: JOHN IS CRUSHING ON BOB TOO

Wendla: IT IS SO CUTE

Anna: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Ilse: how’d u find out?????!??!

Wendla: so i went over to his house

Georg: oooo

Ilse: shut up, george

Wendla: and i didnt even have to mention anything he just started complaining abt how he was trying so hard to impress this one guy and i was like who?

Wendla: and he was like bob and i was like !!!!!

Wendla: and he doesnt even know that bob likes him!!

Martha: did you tell him :O?

Wendla: no

Wendla: i wanted them to figure it out themselves

Thea: …

Thea: you do realize the whole point of this chat is to set them up?

Wendla: yeah but i was also worried john wouldnt believe me

Thea: fine

Martha: but that’s still awesome news :DDDDDDD

Ilse: !!!!!!!!!

Ernst:

Otto: ernst wtf

Ernst: hes happy for them okay?

Anna: so what do we do now?

Ilse: yeah weve come this far

Ernst: what if u guys meet at lunch on thursday? bob and i study then and i can keep him away while you plan?

Wendla: i dont know, lunch is kinda risky

Ilse: live on the EDGE

Georg: theres usually no one in the band room

Otto: yeah when’s the last time u saw john in the band room

Anna: ok then

Anna: thursday lunch in the band room we discuss step 2

Anna: and ernst you keep bob occupied

Ernst: ;)

Ernst: oh god

Ernst: i mean that conspiratorially

Ernst: not in a sexy way

Otto: yeah this isnt operation set ernst and moritz up

Anna: u mean bob

Otto: *sigh* yes i mean bob

Chapter Text

Moritz noticed two things about Ilse when she showed up at his door on Wednesday. The first was that she had a purple umbrella propped on one shoulder. The other was that she looked ridiculously happy.

“Sleep well?” He said as he closed the door behind him.

“I guess. Did you?” Moritz decided not to tell her about the dreams, about the way that the blue angel who used to visit him at night had become much more like someone else they knew, and how (forgive him), he was starting to enjoy it. He shrugged.

“Same as usual. Why the umbrella?” Ilse spun it around her arm impressively.

“The forecast says it’s going to rain. It’s good to be prepared.” As if her words had summoned it, a fat raindrop hit Moritz on the cheek. Then another hit his shoulder. Ilse laughed and swung the umbrella open above their heads. “And an umbrella means we can share.” It was a good thing, too, since the skies decided to open up and let down a shower so thick that Moritz could barely see two feet in front of him.

“It is good to be prepared.”

“Are you doing anything after school today?”

“Nothing out of the ordinary.” That wasn’t technically a lie. “Why do you ask?”

“Because I’m trying to get you to ask me what I’m doing after school,” Ilse teased.

“Okay, then, what are you doing after school?”

“Well, I was texting Wendla last night, and she mentioned bubble tea, and I told her I’d never had it.”

“That’s the one with the black balls in it? She’s made me try it before.” Moritz hadn’t minded the tea part so much, but the boba was just too chewy and kind of distracting. Wendla, however, loved the stuff. “I’m surprised she hasn’t forced you yet.”

“Well, yeah, I guess I never thought to try it. But anyway, she invited me to go out with her and get some this afternoon!”

“Do you think she means, like, on a date?” Ilse blushed.

“Honestly? I hope so.” Moritz grinned.

“Hey, great for you! She’s so sweet.” Ilse laughed.

“Back off, she’s my prospective girlfriend. Besides, don’t you already have your eye on someone?” It was Moritz’s turn to blush.

“I don’t think anything’s going to happen. I mean, I’m pretty sure he sees me as a friend, and honestly I’m okay with that.” You are lying through your teeth, Stiefel. Ilse gave him a pitying look.

“You know, if you ever need a wingwoman, just call.”

“Yeah, I will, when you’re not busy with your new girlfriend.” Ilse shushed him playfully.

“Don’t say it when there are people around!” She shook out the umbrella when they were under the roof, and rolled it up. “I’ll let you know how it goes!”

“See you later, stud.”

The rain was still pounding steadily on the windows by the time Moritz slid into his seat for biology class. He didn’t really have to pay attention to what his teacher was saying, but then she started counting the class off into pairs. And Moritz may have had the worst math average in the class last year, but he could still count. And-yup, just as he feared, his partner was going to be the kid sitting right in front of him. Moritz could feel each time the clock ticked as he waited for Hanschen to turn around and realize who his partner was.

And a moment later, he did. At least his face (which was already showing that he was not interested in a partner project) didn’t change much. When the teacher announced that they could spend the rest of the period working in the library, Hanschen got up without a word and Moritz followed him down the hallway.

But then, when they sat down in the library, Hanschen still didn’t say anything. He just started on the packet the teacher had given them. Moritz sat for a moment, confused, before he finally spoke up.

“Hey,” he whispered. “What do you want me to do?” Hanschen didn’t look up.

“You can keep doing what you’re doing. I’ve got this.” Moritz rolled his eyes.

“This is a partner project. She’ll be able to tell if you’re the only one doing the problems.” Hanschen snorted.

“Yeah, because half of the answers will be wrong.”

“At least let me try them. I’m feeling pretty good about this.” Hanschen stopped writing and finally looked at Moritz.

“If I wanted the kind of answers you’ve been turning in, I’d just ask Melchior.” Moritz froze.

“Melchior?”

“Look, it’s no secret that the only reason you’re doing better in school is because you’ve been getting help from Melchior.” Moritz’s face was burning. “Honestly, it’s kind of sad.”

“There’s-there’s nothing wrong with needing help sometimes,” Moritz sputtered, trying to retain his composure.

“That’s not why it’s sad. It’s sad because you’re so pathetically in love with him that you use any excuse to force him to spend time with you. It’s sad because he has to help you with your homework and he’s too nice to let you down.”

“I’m not in love with Melchior!” Moritz hissed. Hanschen rolled his eyes.

“Please. Don’t act like the only reason he’s still around is because he pities you.”

“You’re lying.” Hanschen shrugged.

“If I was lying, you wouldn’t care this much. You really want to do these problems? Fine. You do the evens, I’ll take the odds.” Moritz wanted to respond, but he was afraid that if he tried to say anything he would start crying. And he was not about to burst into tears in front of Hanschen Rilow. So he worked quietly on the packet until the bell rang and they had to go turn it in. Then he grabbed his books from his locker and walked home without stopping to talk to anyone.

He closed the door behind him as he heard his mother call “Is that you Moritz?”

“Yeah.”

“I didn’t expect you back so early!”

“Melchior was sick today.”

“Oh that’s a shame. Well then, you’d better go do your homework.” Moritz walked up the stairs, closed the door to his bedroom, and then collapsed on his bed and finally cried.

As soon as it started raining, Hanschen knew it was going to be a bad day. Especially since it started raining partway through his walk to school and he was caught unaware, so by the time he got to school he was soaking wet. He tried his best to dry off before class with paper towels, but his hair was still damp and his clothes clung to him, heavy and cold. Great.

Second period he got back his math test, and while he hadn’t felt as confident as usual while taking it, he didn’t think he’d do this poorly. When he got to lunch, he looked around for Ernst, but he was already sitting at a table packed with people didn’t know. And he was laughing at one of their jokes. Ernst wasn’t Hanschen’s only friend, but sometimes he felt as though he needed Ernst as an excuse to sit with, say, Wendla’s friends. Hanschen sat by himself, ate quickly, and then tried to bury himself in the library.

Hanschen Rilow did not cry. Could not, would not, never did. So instead of crying, he shut his doors. Lit up the big neon sign in his front window that said CLOSED and didn’t let anyone get a word in. Not that anyone cared enough to talk to him, anyway. They didn’t even know he had emotions, and right now, he was trying his best not to.

So it was just his luck that he got partnered with Moritz. Moritz, who somehow had friends even though he was the most pitiful person on the planet. Moritz, who managed to get good grades effortlessly because he had a crush on the smartest kid in school. Moritz, who had the audacity to interrupt Hanschen’s attempt at getting this stupid biology packet over with by himself.

So Hanschen didn’t regret a thing he said, then. And he didn’t regret it as he packed his bag and mentally prepared himself for the long, wet walk home.

And he only regretted it a little bit when he saw Melchior Gabor’s face fall every time someone walked out the front doors of the school that wasn’t Moritz Stiefel.

And even then, he only regretted it a little bit.

Wendla had to physically curb her smiling as she unlocked the back door with her spare key. Like, she literally had to put her hand over her mouth to keep from grinning like the world’s biggest lovesick idiot (and yes, she was counting her boys, because even they couldn’t feel this wonderfully smitten). She went to her room and lay down on the bed and squealed silently for a little while. She couldn’t help it! Then, she took her phone out of her purse and plugged it in. As it buzzed, the screen lit up with some notifications she missed while she was out:

MISSED CALL: Melchior Gabor

MISSED CALL: Melchior Gabor

MISSED CALL: Melchior Gabor

Melchior Gabor: where are you?

Melchior Gabor: call me

Wendla dialed Melchior’s number. Maybe he had finally asked Moritz out! She swung her feet over the side of her bed as she waited.

“Hey, Melchior!” She said.

“ Did you see Moritz today? ” That was a weird question.

“Yes. Why?”

“ He didn’t show up today. ”

“Didn’t show up?”

“ We’ve been studying together all week after school, and he didn’t show up today. ”

“Why not?”

“ I don’t know. I didn’t get any text, any call, nothing. Do you think he found out? ”

“Found out what?”

“ That I like him. I bet I scared him off. ” Wendla heard what was probably a sniffle on the other end.

“You don’t know that.”

“ Why wouldn’t he say anything if he didn’t hate me? ”

“I’m sure he doesn’t hate you.”

“ Then why? ” Wendla was pretty sure Melchior was crying now.

“Have you tried asking him? Maybe something came up.”

“I’ve called twice; he won’t pick up. What do I do?”

“We’ll figure this out. Don’t stress about it, okay?”

“ It’s kind of hard not to. ”

“I’ll see what I can do. Are you going to be okay for tonight?”

“ I just want to know what I did wrong. ”

“I’ll call you as soon as I know something.”

“ Okay. Thanks, Wendla. ”

“Goodbye.”

She hung up the phone and then immediately texted Ilse.

Wendla: weve got a problem.

Chapter Text

Moritz tried and failed to focus on his math homework. Every time he looked at the equations, he could just hear Melchior’s voice in his head explaining. And then he heard that other voice.

You use any excuse to force him to spend time with you.

“Shut up,” Moritz mumbled.

He pities you.

“Stop it.”

You’re so pathetically-

Moritz slammed his math textbook closed.

“I’m not in love with him anymore, okay?”

It was a lie. God, if Moritz had ever lied in his life, that was it. Of course he still loved Melchior. Of course he wished that Melchior was here right now, helping him with variables and exponents and all the shit he never could have understood by himself. Hanschen was right. If it wasn’t for Melchior, Moritz wouldn’t be able to understand anything. He was pathetic.

It’s sad.

Three sharp knocks on his door snapped him back to reality.

“Moritz? Your friend Ilse’s here.” He groaned.

“Can you tell her not tonight?”

“Of course. Are you feeling well?”

“I’m fine, mom.”

“Alright.” He listened to the sound of her footsteps as she went back down the stairs and dismissed Ilse.

It wasn’t that he didn’t want to see her, but facing Ilse would also mean facing the fact that his eyes were red and his hair was sticking up and he was crying over a boy that didn’t even like him. He knew that Ilse would try to talk through the problem, and even though he knew that was the best way to go, he didn’t want to tonight. Tonight he needed to be frustrated and alone and unloved.

His phone rang a moment later, like he expected it would. God, what if Ilse wasn’t even here because of him? What if her dad was having a bad night? He was such an idiot.

“I’m sorry Ilse. If you need a place to stay, you can come back.”

“ What? No, this isn’t about me. This is about what happened this afternoon. ”

“You don’t even know what’s going on with me, okay?”

“ But I know something’s wrong. ”

“Give me tonight, Ilse. Please. I’ll be fine.”

“ Moritz- ”

“I’ll tell you everything tomorrow, I just,” he sighed. “I need tonight.”

“ Okay, fine. I’m here if you need to talk to someone. ”

Moritz hung up the phone and put it down on the floor next to him.

What would happen tomorrow? What would happen if he saw Melchior? Would Melchior be concerned? Happy? Would he even care?

He rolled onto his side and lay like that for a while, just staring at the wall. Then he slowly picked himself up, got into bed, and shut off the lights. At least when he was asleep he didn’t have to listen to that voice.

At least when I’m dreaming, Melchior likes me.

When the bell rang for lunch, 8 students moved with a purpose. Not to say that no one else in the school had things to do today, but come on, this was important. And 7 of these students ate quickly and went to the (thankfully empty, except for one kid practicing-and those rooms were soundproof) band room.

After a quick game of rock-paper-scissors, they moved the band chairs into a circle so they could all sit facing each other.

“Can I be the first to say, this is kind of dramatic,” Otto said.

“Maybe it was yesterday,” Wendla said. “But not anymore. People, we have a catastrophe on our hands!” Everyone looked around, confused.

“Okay, that’s dramatic.”

“Can someone please explain what’s going on?” Martha said. Wendla sighed.

“First of all, for context, I just found out that John and Bob have been meeting after school for the past three days.” There were some audible squeals. “But,” she continued, her serious look quieting the group, “yesterday, Bob didn’t go to John’s house.”

“Okay, but that doesn’t necessarily mean anything,” Thea pointed out. “He could have had other plans and just forgot to tell John.”

“Yeah, or maybe he felt sick and went home because he didn’t want John to get infected.”

“But I called Bob last night,” Ilse said. “Because he wouldn’t talk to me in person. And he didn’t tell me much, but he definitely wasn’t doing so well.” She shrugged. “I’m betting it has something to do with John, especially since on our walk to school today, he went out of his way not to see him.”

They heard the door of the practice room open, and turned to see a slightly confused Hanschen walk out.

“Spy!” Anna shrieked. “Grab him!”

“I’m not a- what ?” He looked down to where Thea was holding his arm. He looked back up at her and she shrugged.

“What are you doing here?” Ilse demanded.

“I was practicing my violin solo. What are all of you doing here? Only...two of you even play an instrument.”

“He knows too much. Tie him to the chair!”

“Otto!”

“Sorry, I was getting excited.”

“What do we do now? He know something’s up.”

“Only because we keep mentioning that something’s up.” Hanschen pressed his free fingers to his forehead and sighed.

“Will someone please tell me what’s going on, or at least let me go?”

“No offense,” Martha said, “but you’re not exactly the best at keeping secrets.” The group nodded.

“But maybe he knows something we don’t,” Anna said.

“About what? What is happening?”

“What do you know,” Ilse said, “about what happened to Moritz Stiefel?” Moritz Stiefel? Wait a minute…

“You’re the ones who are trying to set him up with Gabor, aren’t you?” Shocked looks.

“I knew we couldn’t trust Ernst to keep a secret!” Hanschen felt guilty.

“No, I made him tell me. He was trying his best.”

“Okay, so you know why we’re here,” Ilse said, crossing her arms. “That still doesn’t answer my question.”

“What do I know about Moritz? Let’s see. He was getting shitty grades, then he stopped, which had something to do with Melchior. Then I figured out he was in love, and then yesterday-” Hanschen cut himself off.

“Yesterday what? ” Anna glared at him.

“You guys will kill me if I tell you-ow!” Thea’s hand on his arm was like a vice, and tightened suddenly.

“What. Happened. Yesterday.” She growled.

“Fine, I’ll tell you, if you promise not to kill me. And for the record, I was having a really shit day, so it’s not my fault-”

“Spit it out,” Otto said. Hanschen let out a breath.

“I may have told Moritz that Melchior knows he has a crush on him. And he seemed pretty worked up about it.”

“You’d better be glad that I’m friends with Ernst,” Thea said, “because my desire to break your arm is just a hair less than my desire not to break his heart.”

“Well, great,” Wendla said. “So now both of them think the other one knows, and they both think the other hates them.”

“Wait, Melchior actually-”

“Yes, Melchior actually likes Moritz back. That’s a thing that happens when you’re nice to people.”

“Hey, plenty of people like me!”

“No, plenty of people fuck you. There’s a difference.”

“Woah woah,” Ilse said. “As much as I, too, am angry about what Hanschen did, that is no excuse to slut shame. Georg, you’re just jealous since you’re not getting any.”

“ Roasted. ” Otto high-fived Thea.

“This is ridiculous. Can you let me go now?”

“How do we know you’re not going to ruin things any further?”

“Fine. Can I at least help figure out what to do about these two?”

“Hmmm.”

“Okay,” Otto said. “On one condition.” Everyone groaned. “No, guys, I’ve got this.”

“Don’t make me break your arm,” Thea said.

“You can help us if you promise to tell Ernst how you feel about him. And give me that bullshit where you tell him how good of a friend he is. You have to tell him actually tell him.”

“That’s actually pretty good, Otto,” Anna marveled.

“I know, right?” Hanschen blushed.

“Fine, I’ll tell him. Does that mean I can help you guys?” Ilse shrugged.

“I guess.” Thea let go of his arm, and it was bright red where she had been holding it.

“Back on track,” Wendla said. “So, now that we know what our problem is, how do we fix it?”

“It seems like all we really need to do is get them to talk to each other.”

“How are we supposed to do that? They aren’t talking; that’s the issue.”

“Okay, what if we get them each to confess separately? And then film it, and show it to the other?”

“Like in High School Musical, except, the opposite?”

“No, that’s too complicated,” Hanschen said. “Besides, neither would believe it.”

“We could always lock them in a closet…”

Chapter Text

Ernst could feel his phone buzzing nonstop against his leg in math class, and he prayed to whoever was listening that no one would notice. When the bell finally rang, he pulled it out so quickly that he almost dropped it. He was eager to see what his friends had come up with while he had studied with Moritz (who seemed to be falling behind in his homework compared to last time, but Ernst had decided not to mention it).

The first red flag was that not one of the texts was from STUDY BUDDIES 2K16. They were all sent to him, individually. And while they ranged in tone from

Wendla: first of all please dont get mad

to

Otto: holy FUKC ur not gonna BELIEVE what your boyfriend did!

The message was pretty clear.

As Ernst read each one, he could feel his stomach drop lower and lower and he could not believe his eyes. He didn’t want to. He could barely focus during his last period (not that he usually could, but that was beside the point). As he walked down the hallway towards his locker after class, he kept waiting for one of his friends to pop out and say “just kidding!”

But no one did.

The worst thing happened next. He spotted Hanschen down the hall, leaning against a locker. And not just any locker. Ernst’s locker. How could he look so calm? And oh god don’t look this way.

Hanschen grinned when he saw Ernst approaching. He would grin. God, that smile. He seemed to notice that something was up when Ernst didn’t wave back, didn’t smile, anything. Just stared blankly, hoping he would wake up from whatever nightmare this was. Hanschen didn’t say anything, so when Ernst got close enough, he asked quietly.

“Is it true?” In the span of a millisecond, Hanschen’s face fell because he knew exactly what Ernst meant. But he tried to pretend he didn’t.

“Is what true?”

“Wendla told me everything. So did Otto. Also Thea, Ilse, Anna, Martha, and I think Georg did but I couldn’t actually understand. But they all told me what you did.” Hanschen looked down at the floor.

“My question is,” he took a deep breath, “when were you going to?”

“Can we talk about this outside?” They walked in silence to the bicycle rack and Hanschen leaned against it, rubbing his hands over his face. He let out an audible breath. “What do you want to know?”

“I want to hear from you what happened,” Ernst admitted.

So Hanschen told him. Slow and sure. He told him about the rain, about the test, about how he saw Ernst at lunch, and how he couldn’t bring himself to sit with him. Ernst was silent until Hanschen finished telling him about Moritz.

“Why him?” Hanschen couldn’t meet his eyes.

“He doesn’t have anything, Ernst. He doesn’t have good grades, he’s not creative, he’s awkward, and he’s barely contributed anything to this school. But somehow he has people who love and care about him more than…”

“More than?” If Hanschen could cry, maybe he would be right now. Maybe that would relieve him of something that was lodged right behind his chest and cutting off his air supply.

“More than me, Ernst. Even when I do everything right, somehow everyone loves fucking Moritz more than me. They have big group meetings and help him when he’s sad and ask him over and what does everyone do for me? Fuckall. So yeah, I made him go crying home and break Melchior’s heart. But do you know what else I did? I helped his fucking friends come up with a plan to get them back together because they want to see Moritz happy again. Because at least they care.”

“Yeah, I heard about the plan. It sounds ridiculous, though. If you were there, why didn’t you stop them?” Hanschen blushed.

“There was a vote, and the majority won.” Ernst didn’t need to know that Hanschen was part of said majority. “Are you mad at me?” Ernst didn’t answer for a moment.

“Yes.” He said, simply. Hanschen looked back down at his feet. “I’m sorry about what happened, and I’m glad you told them what you did, but of course I’m mad at you. You broke two hearts, both of which belong to people that I’m friends with.” Ernst looked at Hanschen until he met his gaze. “But you know who else I’m friends with? More than Moritz and Melchior?” Hanschen nearly snorted.

“Me?”

“It’s cheesy, whatever. I’m mad at you, and I want you to apologize to them, but I also care about you so much. No matter how mad at you I am, I’ll still always care about you more than anyone else.” He paused, trying to find the right words. “I love you, Hanschen.” Hanschen laughed quietly, and for a moment Ernst’s heart stopped. What have I done?

“That’s my line.”

“What?”

“That’s what I’m supposed to say. I had to tell you how I felt, but I guess you beat me to it.”

“What do you mean “had to”?”

“Some weird things happened today at lunch, but long story short, I was only trusted once I promised to tell you how I felt.”

“And...how do you feel?”

“I love you, Ernst, and I can’t believe you actually love me.” Hanschen wanted to say more, but Ernst leaned in and kissed him. It wasn’t wild, it wasn’t very long, but it radiated emotion. It radiated love .

“Is this okay?” Hanschen nodded.

“This is perfect.” They sat for a moment in silence, the sounds from the front of the school having long since diminished.

“Can you do something for me?”

“Anything.”

“I need you to apologize to Moritz. And maybe Melchior, but if you don’t that’s okay.” Hanschen groaned.

“Why do I have to do it?”

“You fucked up, Hanschen. You need to be the one to make things right.” He sighed.

“Fine. But only because I love you.” He pressed a kiss to Ernst’s hand, and Ernst smiled.

“I hope it’s a little bit because you feel guilty.” Hanschen shrugged. Ernst was right; the longer Hanschen thought about what he’d done, the worst he felt.

“You’re right. I’ve got to go fix this before your friends try.” Hanschen pushed up off the bike rack. “I’ll see you tomorrow?” Ernst nodded.

“See you tomorrow.”

Hanschen could never remember a time he’d been this nervous before. He might actually have been sweating. His heart was beating so loudly in his chest that he could feel it all the way down in his toes. Hanchen never got this nervous.

He issued a silent prayer that this was the right house after he knocked on the door. Ernst had given him the address after Hanschen realized he had no idea where Moritz lived. Honestly, he probably could have waited until school tomorrow to do this, but A. Hanschen wasn’t expected at home until five and B., he really did need to get this off his chest.

He was relieved to see that Moritz had answered the door (what would he have done if it had been one of his parents?), but at about the same time that Hanschen realized who opened the door, Moritz realized who had knocked. And then he promptly shut the door in Hanschen’s face.

Oh well, looks like he doesn’t want to see you. You tried.

No, you have to do this. Knock again.

Hanschen knocked a second time and Moritz opened the door.

“What do you want?” Hanschen felt like crawling out of his own skin; he did not want to be here.

“Can I talk to you?” Moritz rolled his eyes.

“Why? So you can make me look like an idiot even more than I already am?”

“Actually, I needed to tell you that I’m sorry.”

“Uh-huh,” Moritz said skeptically.

“And that I lied to you. About Melchior.” Moritz looked around as if he was afraid someone might come by.

“Let’s go to my room to talk, but only because you’re letting all the air out.” Hanschen nodded and followed Moritz up the stairs to his bedroom. There was nothing unexpected about it: the walls were covered in posters and sheets of papers with reminders on them, the floor was scattered with books and pens, and Moritz’s bed was unmade. Moritz sat down on his bed after closing the door, and looked at Hanschen, who was still standing. “What were you saying?” Hanschen sighed.

“What I told you, about Melchior pitying you, it isn’t true. I made that up.”

“Why would you do that ?”

“Fuck, I don’t know, okay? I was having a bad day, and you happened to be there. I knew how to hurt you, so I did.”

“You’re not really making the best case for me to trust you.”

“I’m telling the truth. Melchior doesn’t hate you, and he doesn’t know how you feel about him.” Moritz turned bright red, ready to defend himself. “And don’t act like you don’t have a crush on him, because that part is definitely true. But he thinks you hate him now, since you ditched him.”

“It’s not like he cares anyway; he didn’t even ask what was wrong,” Moritz mumbled. Hanschen had to keep himself from rolling his eyes. These boys and their emotions. Why is everything so complicated?

“He does care about you, Moritz. He’s not helping you because he pities you, I told you, I made that up. He’s helping you because he likes you, and you like him, so you two need to talk it out and start dating already.”

“What do you know about what Melchior thinks?”

“It’s obvious, okay? If you want, you can stay in your room and avoid him forever, that’s fine, or you can tell him how you feel.” Moritz looked down at the floor.

“And what if you’re wrong? What if he doesn’t feel that way?”

“Look, I came here to apologize for what I did, not play matchmaker for you two. I told you what you need to know, now you have to go and fix it.” Hanschen turned and headed towards the door. He heard Moritz say something quietly behind him. “What was that?”

“Thanks,” Moritz said. Hanschen smiled in spite of himself (but Moritz would never see).

“Good luck,” he whispered to himself as he went down the stairs, although he doubted Moritz would need it.

Chapter Text

The major flaw with Moritz’s plan was that he was too chicken to actually knock on the Gabor’s front door, so he was reserved to walking slowly past Melchior’s house in the hopes that he would come and join him outside. The first time, Moritz failed and felt utterly ridiculous, but he was committed, so he circled around the block and tried again. At least he had left some extra time before school even started. Honestly, Melchior might not even be awake yet.

The second time, he was heading away down the sidewalk and readying himself for a third pass when he heard a door open and then his name, and his heart stopped beating.

“Moritz?” He turned around slowly to see Melchior walking carefully towards him. If he had been a little more relaxed, he might have noticed that Melchior looked just as nervous as he felt.

“Hey,” Moritz said, unsure how to begin. What do you say in this situation?

“Are you going to school?”

“Yeah.” He paused for too long. “Do you wanna walk with me?” Melchior smiled cautiously.

“Okay.” They started down the sidewalk and Moritz desperately racked his brain for a way to sum everything up that he wanted to convey. He’d gone over this conversation a million times in his head, why was he coming up blank now? He stopped in the middle of the sidewalk. “Is everything okay?” Melchior looked concerned. Moritz let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding.

“I’m sorry I avoided you the past two days.” Melchior looked down at his feet and kicked a pebble on the sidewalk.

“I don’t blame you, I’m sorry I made you uncomfortable.” Moritz furrowed his brow.

“What? Why would you think that? This isn’t your fault at all.”

“No, you don’t have to lie to me. I know that I did something wrong.”

“Melchior, look at me.” Moritz took a moment, debating on whether or not to say what he really wanted to. “I stopped coming over because I thought you were only hanging out with me to be nice.”

“Why would I have done that?” Moritz averted his eyes.

“Because you found out that I have a crush on you.” For a moment, he wished he could scoop up those words from the sidewalk and put them back in his mouth. Melchior’s eyes went wide and Moritz instantly regretted everything he’d ever done in his entire life. But then Melchior smiled at him and his heart started beating again, faster than ever. He was pretty sure it was going to dive out of his throat.

“Honestly?” Moritz nodded, as his heartbeat dilemma kept him from speaking. “I can’t believe it.”

“Which part?” Moritz squeaked out, fighting to breathe and keep a semi-straight face and not pass out right then and there.

“I can’t believe how lucky I am.” Melchior held out his hand. “May I?” Moritz put his hand in Melchior’s, who looked down at it, concerned. “Are you okay? I can feel your pulse, and it’s-”

“I’ll be fine. What were you saying?” Melchior laughed.

“I can’t believe you have a crush on me, because I’ve had one on you for ages.” This whole pulse thing was getting very dangerous.

“Really?” Melchior nodded.

“I meant to tell you, but then you were avoiding me and I thought you were feeling weird around me , and I honestly can’t believe that we both had the same problem.” Moritz could barely process what was going on, as not only was Melchior holding his hand, but he had a crush on Moritz!

“Would you, I mean, could you maybe?” Moritz took a deep breath to compose himself. “Melchior, do you want to go out with me?” Melchior, despite himself, began blushing.

“Yes.” They gazed at each other in a way that may have looked cheesy, but felt for each incredibly beautiful. Suddenly Moritz had a realization.

“We should probably get to school if we don’t want to be late.”

“Oh, yeah.” They continued walking down the sidewalk, a little quicker than usual. “Hey, what do we tell other people?”

“Do we need to tell them anything?”

Right before lunch period, Moritz’s phone buzzed with a text. As soon as he could, he took it out and checked it.

Ilse: moritz come to the band room its an emergency

He walked as quickly as he could. Although Ilse’s definition of emergency was incredibly broad, he knew it was just as likely that she might actually need him as it was that she wanted his help deciding who to ask to the winter formal. And Moritz didn’t really want to take a chance if Ilse really did need help (plus, he kind of owed her for blowing her off the other night). But when he walked into the band room, she wasn’t there yet. Maybe she had gotten caught up in the hallway. Moritz sighed onto one of the chairs and waited there until someone walked into the room. But it wasn’t Ilse, it was-

“Melchior?” He looked out of breath, as if he had just run here. Not two seconds after he walked into the room, the door slammed shut behind him. “What the-” Melchior walked closer to Moritz and spoke in a low tone.

“I overheard Otto talking to Georg last period. Apparently, our friends have been trying to set us up, and they still think we haven’t talked about Wednesday.”

“So they locked us in here to...talk it out?” Melchior nodded. “Those motherfuckers.”

“Yeah. And I’ll bet they’re trying to listen to us right now.” Figured. “Do you want to have some fun with this?” Moritz grinned. “Follow my lead.” Melchior took a small step away and dramatically put his hand on his forehead. “Moritz,” he said in an exaggerated voice. “How could you abandon me for our study sessions?” Moritz turned away from Melchior and spoke in an equally dramatic voice.

“Because I didn’t want your pity.” He leaned against the wall for effect and pretended not to notice his friends’ heads peeking through the glass window on the door.

“But Moritz,” Melchior said as he dropped to his knees. “I’ve never pitied you. I’ve always admired you.” Moritz sniffed.

“Don’t pretend you don’t know my horrible secret.”

“Your horrible secret?”

“I...I...love you, Melchior. And I stayed away from you because I couldn’t stand to be around a man who didn’t love me back.” Melchior looked a little surprised that Moritz had dropped the L-word, but he stayed in character.

“But you’re mistaken. You see, I love you too.” Moritz gasped (partly for show, but partly for real).

“You do?” Melchior stood up and mouthed can I kiss you? . Moritz nodded.

“I do.”

Even the sound-protected walls of the band room couldn’t keep out the cheering and clapping of their friends as Melchior and Moritz dramatically kissed. And kept kissing. And knocked over a chair. Moritz was pretty sure Georg said something indignant at that point, but he honestly was barely focusing since there was so much focusing to be done right in front of him. Melchior supported him with a hand against his back and everything felt just right and oh god this was a million times better than the first time Moritz had kissed someone . After an uncomfortably long (for everyone else) makeout, Melchior whispered “Are you alright?” Moritz nodded, out of breath. He looked over Melchior’s shoulder at Ilse, who was excitedly giving him a thumbs-up while Anna and Wendla high-fived behind her.

“Do you think they really fell for that?” Moritz whispered. Melchior shrugged.

“Whether they did or not doesn’t really matter since we’re together either way. It’s okay that they know?”

“Only if it’s okay for me to kiss you again.” He looked up at Melchior, who nodded, and then pressed their lips together. This wasn’t the dramatic kind from moments ago, this was something more tender. It felt fuller. They silently agreed that, later, when they thought of the first kiss they shared, it was this one. They pulled apart and stood for a moment, the room vibrating with energy. “What happens now?”

“I guess we have to face our friends.” Melchior slid his hand into Moritz’s and they walked towards the door where their friends were eagerly watching.

“Wait a second,” Moritz said when they opened the door. “How long have you been scheming about this?” Everyone was instantly much more fascinated with looking at the wall or the floor than with looking at Moritz. He sighed. “Ilse?” She smiled sheepishly.

“I didn’t want you to be even more worried. Besides, everything worked out okay, right?” Moritz sighed, but Melchior laughed.

“ I’m honestly surprised that this plan worked,” Thea said. “I thought for sure it was a stupid plan.”

“Yeah,” Hanschen said as he sent a knowing look to Moritz. “Isn’t it funny how things worked out.” Moritz would never admit it, but he was silently thankful that Hanschen had apologized when he did. Moritz would much rather have apologized in private than with nine pairs of eyes on him (ten, if you counted Melchior).

“So you guys are, like, together now?” Anna said. Melchior looked over at Moritz, who nodded in confirmation.

“Yeah,” he said with a smile. “We are.”

From the crowded lunchroom to the quiet bookshelves of the library, everyone in the school heard something that they could not identify. Some of them would talk about the sound, others would forget it, but for a moment, they all wondered what it was.

And, as far as Moritz was concerned, none of them needed to know that it was the deafening cheer of nine students for him and his boyfriend.