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Yuji flinched, the darkness of the cavern pressing in until it felt like the walls were shrinking in on them. A huge blob of water plummeted from the ceiling and struck his forehead, leaving behind a cold, wet trail as it dripped down to his cheek.

He wiped it off, dragging the two sleeping bags behind him with a groan. A second drop hit his nape right after, sending a shiver down his spine, "Goddammit. Is there really no better place to stay in than this dump?"

The cave echoed the wild storm from outside, as if the rock itself were a living thing offended by Yuji's insult. The thunder's roar was softened only by the wet slap of heavy downpour against the mountain, and a pale light of lightning flickered at the entrance every few minutes, far too weak to penetrate deeper inside the tunnel.

"No."

Yuji didn't push. There was no point in arguing with Fushiguro when he used that voice.

He pointed the flashlight down, eyes searching the ground for the driest spot. His soaking boots squeaked against the mess of puddles that was the cave floor, and with every step, the hope of finding a decent place to sleep began to dwindle.

The surroundings changed as he tread further into the grotto, green patches of damp moss mixing in with the earth and stone to give it life. Yuji squinted his eyes. A spot of ground that was considerably lighter compared to the dirt surrounding and barely wide enough to fit his sleeping bag, let alone both, caught his attention.

Crouching down, he pressed his middle finger hard into the soil. The turf was cold and packed tight, but thankfully, no water seeped out under the pressure. Yuji breathed out in relief, letting go of the sleeping bags. It would do well enough for now.

"Oh, good."

A stack of sticks clattered right in front of Yuji's eyes, sending a nasty cloud of grime his way. A violent cough tore out of his throat as the dirt attacked his nose, and he tumbled back. Fushiguro's face emerged from above as he casually brushed off his hands, completely indifferent. His hair had already begun to dry out, with only a few dark strands still clinging to his skin.

"Dude," Yuji wheezed out, waving a palm before his face, "What the hell?"

He nudged the wood with his foot, "What? You said you'd set up the fire."

"Well, yeah–" Yuji scrunched his nose, getting up on his feet, "But I'll put it by the wall so we can sleep here where it's dry, duh."

"Thinking isn't your best suit, is it?" Fushiguro groaned, pointing at the ceiling. Yuji's eyes followed his finger up to the protruding stalactites scattered around the whole roof of the cave. Big beads of water hung suspended from every single tip, threatening to drip down any second, "Good luck keeping the fire alive, idiot."

Yuji ducked his head in defeat, pouting, "I don't want my ass to get wet, man."

There was also that other reason Yuji didn't mention, but with how things were looking, he doubted it would change Fushiguro's mind.

"You'll live," Fushiguro threw out offhandedly, brushing past him, "It's better than freezing to death."

Not able to come up with a better argument, Yuji gave in. The pattern of not getting any sleep at night had been following him for the past few weeks anyway, and things probably wouldn't get any better tonight, even if he did have to sleep on wet moss.

He dragged one sleeping bag over by the pile of wood and tossed the other one across from him, letting the soon-to-be fire pit sit between them. If he had to wake up with mold growing over his dick, he'd sure as hell make sure to get a good view of Fushiguro's snoozing face at least.

"Nue."

Yuji whipped his head back at the entrance, where the shadows of the cave had already molded into the shape of a familiar shikigami. The owl-like creature let out a low shriek, head shaking as it tucked its massive wings tighter, trying to fit in the small space between the stone walls.

Fushiguro placed a reassuring palm on its head, leaning over, "Search the area. Make sure no one is around while it is out."

Nue dipped its head in silent acknowledgement before obediently jumping out into the rain. The shikigami shuddered as the harsh wind blew through its feathers, before leaping up and disappearing into the night.

"I hope that thing is still out there," Yuji dragged his backpack into his lap, shoving a hand inside.

Truthfully, saying he hoped was a bit of an understatement. It was more like pretending that they weren't in as deep a shithole as they quite obviously were. Yuji expected no less when Kusakabe had brought them into Principal Yaga's old office, head propped against his hand on the desk. 

"It already killed more than fifty hikers. Grade 1 at least. Hard to say, since it went right into hiding after we found it." The man leaned back on the chair with a squeak, rubbing his temples, "We've been trying to exorcise it, but now that it knows we're out to get it, it's like looking for a needle in a haystack."

He opened the worn-out drawer and pulled a piece of paper before handing it over to them. Yuji held up the rough sketch, making out the shapes in the black lines that barely resembled anything.

​"Weather’s going to be hell, so there shouldn't be any civilians," Kusakabe waved a hand dismissively, "Act fast. We might not get a better chance later."

"I can handle a Grade 1 on my own," Fushiguro snatched the paper out of Yuji's hand, jerking a thumb at him, "Why are you dragging him into this?"

Kusakabe's face twisted into a frown. He scratched the back of his neck, looking everywhere but at them, "To be honest with you, the higher-ups only sent for Itadori to go. I picked you to tag along just to make sure it went fine. I would like to keep the casualties on missions to a minimum from now on."

Just like that, they were made to pack and prepare for the worst trip of their lives. The very next morning, Ijichi dropped them off at the foot of the mountain, leaving behind the two sleeping bags, a single rolled-up tent for them to share, and a trembling "good luck".

It wasn't all that bad at first. The drizzle of rain at dawn was nothing compared to that downpour now, and it even gave him a false sense of security that things would go smoothly.

Before they got stuck in the cave, they had spent most of their time walking around the forest looking for any residuals of cursed energy. The search ended up futile, and they found nothing that would indicate a curse had ever stepped into the mountain, let alone resided there.

To make himself feel better about the lack of payoff for all the trouble, Yuji came up with the brilliant idea of pretending they had gone on a boring walk with their dog instead of a boring mission.

The Divine Dog played his part of an overgrown pet perfectly as it ran around with its nose buried in the wet grass, and while it was shrouded in the thick fog, Yuji couldn't even see his massive hand-like paws to break the immersion. But as to be expected with such boring-yet-possibly-deadly missions, things couldn't stay nice for long.

The illusion shattered after just a few hours of peace, when the sky had all but clouded up with a dark omen. Thunder began to roll in from behind as they dashed through the trees blindly, lightning bolts creeping in on them as rain began to pick up.

It was the shikigami that led them into the nearest safe space it could find, which happened to be a massive cave exposed in the rocks. They were only supposed to stay there for an hour or two to wait out the worst of it, but after a few had rolled by, it became clear the thunder wasn't going anywhere. The day had already ended by then and stretched out into a night, leaving them stuck as all hell broke loose outside.

"Yeah," Fushiguro's voice called out. He leaned back against the wall, gazing out into the distance of the forest, "Me too."

In any other circumstances, Yuji would be ecstatic to spend some time alone with him. Sure, they technically had a curse to exorcise, but after all the shit they've survived, it was hard to believe some random ugly out there was capable of defeating them.

That basically made it a free romantic trip to the mountains with just the two of them. Yuji had almost seen it with his eyes as he packed his backpack– them lying out under the bare sky, huddled together for warmth as they pointed out the constellations above.

Or Fushiguro would, since he didn't know all that much about them. But watching the boy trace the invisible lines while Yuji nodded along would make him just as happy as if he were the one doing it.

Fushiguro…

The lighter flickered with a small tongue of fire. He brought the dry stick closer, guiding the flame to where he'd stripped off its outer layer, revealing shavings of light wood. They burned instantly, turning into gray dust as Yuji blew at them in desperation to get the flame going.

What's gotten into you?

Seeing how the reality turned out like anything but the fantasy in his head, Yuji couldn't ignore the weird tension between them anymore. It had been there ever since they left, but with all the thoughts already weighing on his mind, he tried blaming it on the whole circumstances of their mission.

It was easier than believing that Yuji's worries were actually beginning to take shape.

After all, Fushiguro wasn't exactly the "let's go on an adventure" type of guy. Logically, he was bound to walk around pissed off. He didn't like walking around in the rain with his hair soaked, hated going up the steep mountain paths, and definitely didn't appreciate having to sleep in some shitty tent in the cold.

Guess the last one worked out for him in the end, since the tent didn't even last five minutes before snapping in Yuji’s hands. As he watched the torn fabric be snatched away by the wind after Fushiguro had angrily chucked the whole thing outside, he started to think that maybe the mission was getting to him a bit too hard.

"Can you move it?" An annoyed groan broke him out of his thoughts.

But now sitting in there, engulfed in darkness and the damp smell of moss, Yuji started to second-guess himself. Was it just the mission that got Fushiguro so pissed off, or was it… him?

"I'm going as fast as I can," Yuji furrowed his brows, shaving away more of the wood to feed into the flames, "Chill."

Fushiguro was always a little rough around the edges– that was just the way he was, and Yuji grew to genuinely love that side of him, half-hearted insults and all. But this borderline hostile attitude felt different than just his usual moodiness.

Sure, Yuji's movements were a little sluggish from the lack of sleep, and maybe the overexcitement he took on to hide it better began to annoy Fushiguro– but even then, in normal circumstances, he would just tell him to stop and not go all prickly on him.

That morning was the biggest telling that something was wrong. First, Fushiguro chewed him out for getting them lost. He blamed it all on Yuji just because he was the one to choose a path, never mind that neither of them had ever set foot on this mountain before.

Then came the accusation that he wasn't taking the threat seriously, all because he’d suggested hitching a ride on Divine Dog back. Fushiguro didn't even try to listen to him, and no amount of explaining how "it would be faster" got through to him. Yuji bet the dog would be happy to do it too.

"I am," Fushiguro snapped, wrapping his arms around himself, "I'm fucking cold. I told you we should have done it earlier."

After all the outbursts, he gave up on trying to understand his sudden anger. If Fushiguro himself didn't want to say what had caused it out loud, no amount of prying could get it out of him either, so Yuji figured they would just sort it out later.

It's not like they had a big fight beforehand, so whatever was eating at him couldn't be too serious. Nothing that a few soft kisses pressed on that sweet spot of his neck wouldn't fix, anyway.

A faint wisp of smoke grew under the wood, struggling to breathe before releasing into the air. Yuji watched it rise, letting out a dry laugh, "Yeah, I'd be cold too if I went out of my way to stand by the entrance."

"Do you think I'm standing here because I want to?" His voice echoed through the walls, making it twice as loud, "Nue is out there searching for that thing while we're sitting on our asses."

"Okay, okay! I didn't mean it like that," Yuji backpedaled instantly, "It just isn't exactly hard to miss with that big ass orange head and wings. It'll be fine, so just come–"

The sound of footsteps grew louder, and before Yuji could even finish his sentence, Fushiguro had stopped in the dead center of the tunnel.

"Is this shit funny to you?"

The sky outside split open. A flash of lightning turned the cave white for a second, followed by a roar of thunder that shook the stone walls. The rain hitting the roof of the cave became louder, and Yuji swore, leaning over the fire pit to protect the struggling spark from the cold water falling around them.

"What? No. I wasn't–" Yuji bit his tongue, trying to ignore the feeling of freezing water splashing down on his nape and sliding under his clothes, "Babe, I'm just trying to lighten the mood."

"You're doing a shit job, then."

It's fine, he's just annoyed.

"Yeah, no shit." He gritted out, "It's pretty hard to do when my boyfriend's walking around with a stick up his ass."

Nothing is happening.

Another boom outside. Yuji felt the cold seeping into his skin, but kept the shiver in. He just needed to get that goddamn fire working, and then they'd stop arguing, and everything would go back to normal.

"Can you act serious for one minute? That fucking curse could be out there waiting to kill people right now, and you're sitting there taking the piss out of it!"

We're fine.

"We didn't see anything out there! If it was–"

We're fine.

"You didn't see anything, Itadori, and I'm not surprised since–"

We're fine, so please, just stop–

Soft crackles filled the air, breathing a roar of fire into the darkness of the cave. Yuji hadn't noticed the flames growing stronger until their warmth washed over his chest. He forgot just how close he was leaning by the fire pit, too, but all it took was one sharp sting for him to remember. The fire flared up before his eyes, wild and uncontrolled, bursting right in his face.

Fushiguro froze, the anger gone from his voice as he called out, "Itadori!"

Yuji recoiled, his body hitting against the ground with a thud. He rolled over to the side, one hand clawing at the dirt while the other flew up to where the pain began spreading across his jaw. Before he could cover the wound, he felt his wrists being forced down. A hiss escaped his lips as air bit into the raw skin of his chin, revealing a nasty burn.

"Itadori–" Fushiguro was already over him, his eyes wide and frantic as he cupped Yuji's jaw, carefully tilting it up, "You okay? Show me."

His voice was gentle and kind now, and his pale face so full of worry that Yuji couldn't help but melt under the soft touch. He hadn't realized how much he missed it until it was there, and if getting burned meant he could feel it forever, Yuji would gladly shove his whole face back into the fire right now.

"Could be worse," Yuji let out a ragged laugh, trying to focus on his palm and not the pain, "You could kiss it better, though."

Fushiguro sighed, pulling away without a word. Yuji's chest cinched in pure agony as he watched him move away, the warmth of the hand still lingering on his cheek as if to break him even more.

No, come back, he pleaded, I don't want to argue anymore.

Fushiguro grabbed his backpack, frantically searching the main pocket before ripping out a plastic water bottle, "Here–"

"It's fine," Yuji choked out, waving his hands dismissively, "Don't waste it."

Having given up on that kiss, Yuji squeezed his eyes shut to get a better grip on the other healing power. It had been a while since he’d needed to use the Reverse Cursed Technique, and even after all the training, the sensation of multiplying the energy still didn't come that easily.

Thankfully, after a moment of racking his brain, steam began to hiss from his chin as the blistered flesh knitted itself back together.

Fushiguro pulled the water bottle back slowly, letting it slip from his fingers and drop to the ground.

"Oh," He murmured with a blank look, "Right. You can do that."

Yuji didn't have time to unpack that sudden shift in the air between them. A wild gust of wind broke into the cave, nearly snuffing out the fire with one blow.

He lunged to cup his hands around the pit, barely managing to keep it from completely going out, "Now wind? Give me a break!"

Fushiguro whipped his head around. He jumped to his feet, staring at the entrance, "It's not wind."

A familiar, electric screech echoed off the stone walls, followed by the heavy beat of wings. The shikigami forced its way in, its moving shadow momentarily swallowing the whole tunnel as it returned to its owner. Nue shook its feathered body like a wet puppy as it landed, spraying droplets of water all over the ground.

It nodded its head with a few sharp screeches, jumping up on the bird-like feet. Yuji couldn't quite figure out what it meant by that, but Fushiguro seemed to get it just fine. He sighed, putting his hands behind his neck and leaning back with a grunt. As he turned away, the shikigami lost its form, melting into black sludge that dissolved into the ground instantly.

"Didn't see anything," Fushiguro said, refusing to meet his eyes. "Guess you were right."

"Okay. Yeah," Yuji muttered, scraping a finger against his chin where only the intangible traces of a burn remained, "We'll just look in the morning."

Outside, the lightning faded, leaving behind only the dripping sound of rain. Silence stretched between them as they stared into the fire, broken by its crackle as Yuji tossed another branch to be swallowed into the flames. The gray smoke rose and scratched against his throat, suffocating him, but it was a small price to pay for keeping Fushiguro warm.

"…Itadori," Fushiguro started, his voice straining, "I–"

Yuji flinched as the fire popped, sending a spark into the dirt next to him. The warmth of the flames did nothing to soothe the coldness of his soul, and yet, he couldn't help but cling to them anyway.

"It's okay," He cut him off, digging into the pit with a stick. There was no need to reopen the old wounds, even if they still stung, "It's fine, really."

Drip.

Yuji rolled to the side with a quiet grunt, tugging at his hoodie. He was seconds away from ripping it off and throwing it to the flames for the crime of making him uncomfortable.

Drip.

He stared at the cave wall, watching the dark shadows cast by the fire dance against the stone. The odor of wet dirt filled his nostrils to the brim, and with every inhale, it became harder to ignore the way it stuck to his throat.

I'm gonna lose my fucking mind.

Drip.

The sleeping bag rustled as Yuji kicked his legs, trying to force blood back into his numbing toes. Not even wearing two pairs of socks could save him from all the moisture in the air, amplifying the coldness of his feet all the more.

He waited for the next drop of water to hit the ground.

"What are you doing?"

The sound of the drip was stifled by a hushed grumble. Suddenly, all the boring shadows he had stared at for the past hour or so became that much more interesting. And yet, the last thing Yuji wanted was to bring more of Fushiguro's inexplicable anger onto himself.

Reluctantly, he turned to face him. Fushiguro was snuggled up in his sleeping bag from neck down, with only the spiky head sticking out over the cover. The exhaustion became just a tad more bearable as Yuji took in the sight of his messy hair, sleepy expression, and those half-lidded green eyes staring at him.

"Sorry." He whispered, voice laced with dreamy tenderness, "I didn't mean to wake you up."

Fushiguro's eyes fluttered shut, his chin dipping down as he struggled to keep it up, "That's not what I asked."

Yuji bit his tongue. He had hoped that by leaving him without an answer long enough, Fushiguro would eventually drift off and forget the question entirely. The exact opposite happened, and as the drowsiness began to shake off, the look on his face hardened with a demand for a proper reply.

"Can't fall asleep," Yuji cracked under the insistent gaze. It wasn't a blatant lie– just a very simplified truth.

"You?" Fushiguro's voice came out rougher than usual, "Since when? You sleep like a rock."

It was obvious he would notice something was off. Fushiguro’s perceptive nature was both a blessing and a curse, and right now, Yuji wished the flames of the firepit would swallow it whole just for this single night.

"Well, right now the only rock's the one digging in my crack." Yuji threw out, lying back on his arms in forced relaxation.

Fushiguro didn't laugh at the joke, unsurprisingly. If Yuji wasn't so desperate, he would have felt ashamed at how poor his attempt at changing the subject was.

"That's all?" He asked.

"Just some nightmares," Yuji waved a hand before his face, "It's fine."

He knew Fushiguro wouldn't be happy with that answer either, but figured after another open dismissal, the boy would give in and let the matter drop.

"What type of nightmares?" Fushiguro pressed on so unlike himself.

"I don't remember." He wouldn't budge anyway and shrugged it off all too quickly, "It's not like it matters, really."

Why did Fushiguro choose today, of all days, to be so stubborn?

Yuji wouldn't make him remember the worst moments of their lives just because he was too weak to get over them on his own. His love for Fushiguro was too great to let him bear the weight of his wounds, when he already had to carry his own.

"Fine." Fushiguro's tone wasn't as cold as Yuji expected it to be, sounding more resigned than anything. "Have it your way, then."

Yuji falsely assumed that was the end of it, and Fushiguro would roll over and go back to sleep. To his surprise, the other sleeping bag ripped open. Fushiguro emerged from it with a grunt and moved over to the wall, brushing his palms against the dark pants of his uniform.

"Fushiguro?" Yuji lifted his head, one eyebrow raised as he watched him roll up his sleeves.

Ignoring him, Fushiguro reached for a dry branch and tossed it into the pit. The wood went up in flames, lighting the whole cave in a brighter glow. He pulled the drying jacket of his uniform off their makeshift drying rack and spread it on the ground to sit on.

"Just watch," Fushiguro muttered, crossing his legs, "I… have an idea that might help."

Yuji went still, watching as if in a trance. The flickering light illuminated Fushiguro’s pale hands as he crouched between the stone and the pit, casting a massive shadow on the wall behind him.

He brought his palms together, sliding one over the other until his thumbs locked and his fingers fanned out like feathers. Yuji didn't understand at first, but as his gaze shifted from Fushiguro's slender hands to the wall, a familiar winged shadow stretched over it.

"Nue?" Yuji propped himself up on his elbow, tilting his head to the side, "Why are you summoning him again?"

"I'm not," Fushiguro rolled his eyes, but there was no bite in his words. It was just his usual you still don't know the basics, do you? tone of voice, "It's not just about the hand signs. The intent behind them matters, too. Like with binding vows."

"Oooh, okay," Yuji nodded. If there's one thing in particular that he loved about him, it was being able to use him like his own personal jujutsu Google search, "Shit, that's good. I can only imagine what it would be like to do it by accident."

Fushiguro paused, "…That can still happen."

"Huh?"

"Never mind."

He twisted his wrists, pressing the backs of his hands together. The next gesture was far too complicated for Yuji's eyes to follow, with some of Fushiguro's fingers wrapping around each other while the others bent in various ways, but the confusion faded the instant the shadow took on a tangible outline.

Yuji's mouth hung open, watching the shadow puppet nod its little head with a twitch of long ears. With a few flicks of his fingers, the animal on the wall began hopping up and down as Fushiguro worked his magic.

"Oh! I know!" Yuji's hand shot up as if back in middle school, desperate for his hot teacher to call on him to answer, "Bunny! No, no– Rabbit! Rabbit Escape!"

Fushiguro scoffed, the fire lighting up the half-smirk on his face, "Good. I was worried that might be too hard for you to guess."

"Hey!"

The rabbit dissolved into nothingness as Fushiguro’s hands unwound. He glanced up at the roof, brow raised in thought. He turned his body to face Yuji and raised two palms over his head. A big hole formed with his hands as he pressed the index and middle fingers together, bending the little ones inwards to make two bumps sticking out on each side.

"That's… uh…" Yuji tilted his head, squinting hard.

Maybe it was the exhaustion that made his brain malfunction, but no matter how much he stared, Yuji couldn't figure out what shape it was supposed to represent. The big hole just reminded him of one of those tests for psychopaths in crime movies, where they have to describe what they see in shapeless splodges of ink.

Seeing him struggle, Fushiguro bit into his bottom lip to contain a smile creeping onto his face, "Do you want a hint?"

"…Yeah."

"It's one of my shikigami, too."

"Oh, damn…" Yuji leaned in closer, scratching his chin as he studied the shadow. It would make him look pretty stupid if he couldn't guess his own boyfriend's shikigami, but that gaping hole barely resembled anything, let alone an animal.

Even if he assumed it was a mouth, and the two bumps worked as its little eyes, that didn't narrow it all that much. Because what animals didn't have a mouth and eyes? Maybe some dumb bug, but there was no way Fushiguro just so happened to have a dumb bug shikigami in his arsenal. Wasn't there?

"Time's up," Fushiguro sighed, dropping his hands to break the shadow, "It was Toad."

"Aw, man!" Yuji groaned, whipping his head back. He dragged his palms down his face in defeat, "That didn't even look like him!"

He furrowed his brows, "The big mouth?"

Yuji stared at him, his own big mouth open, "Okay, in my defense, there are ten of them. That's a lot of animals to remember."

"For an idiot," Fushiguro tilted his head, eyes glinting with amusement.

"Shut up," He pouted. Fine, maybe.

Fushiguro shook out his hands, fingers flexing to work out the stiffness. Yuji took the time to spread his legs, letting the flames warm up his numb toes. He almost forgot a fight had ever taken place by the same fireplace. Maybe Yuji was just overthinking, after all?

Everything was fine now. Fushiguro was back to calling him an idiot– but in that affectionate way, and not with the dismissive tone from earlier. Yuji even caught the traces of a smile tugging at his lips from time to time, and he didn't look even slightly annoyed anymore. And he even used his technique to cheer him up! Fushiguro wouldn't do that if he hated him.

"Did Gojo-sensei teach you all that?" Yuji mused, the fire crackling as he spoke.

Fushiguro tried to play it off, but Yuji caught the way his body tensed up just slightly. "Not directly. He took me to the Zenin estate once, and the clan head at the time shared some scrolls on the technique."

A big drop splashed right before his eyes, and he flinched. Yuji grabbed his uniform jacket and tried to toss it across to him, but he just shook his head.

"Though… I had already learned some of them before that. By accident," He paused, his expression darkening as he stared into the flames, "When I first started seeing curses, I was terrified to fall asleep. Tsumiki made me play this dumb little game with her before going to bed."

He clasped his hands together, wrapping one over the other and sticking his thumbs up to form perked ears. The corners of Fushiguro's lips curled up gently, the flames dancing in the reflection of his eyes, "It helped back then. Figured it could work for you, too."

The shadow on the wall took on a shape that closely resembled a snout. It followed the graceful movements of his hands, up and down, giving life to the head of the wolf.

Yuji grinned instantly, voice full of fondness as if talking about his firstborn son, because he was, "Oh! My favorite puppy!"

"Puppy, huh," Fushiguro scoffed, looking at the wall with that same tender affection, "How about this, then?"

The wolf's head morphed, stretching and extending until a full body formed out of the darkness. The outline was so sharp, and the movement so lifelike, that Yuji glanced behind them to make sure Fushiguro hadn't actually summoned the beast behind them just to mess with him.

Yuji watched in awe as it ran across the rock's surface, bound by the invisible strings tied to Fushiguro's fingers. He dropped one palm, and the shadow-wolf sat down, curling its tail neatly around its paws just like the real thing.

"Dude," Yuji breathed out, his eyes wide, "That's… wow."

Fushiguro twisted his wrist and clawed his fingers at the air. On the wall, the shadow-puppet mimicked him, now frantically digging into the bottom of the rock. The next moment, he threw his palm open, and the shadow-puppet leaped upward with him. A gust of wind swept outside the cave as it threw its head back, giving the eerie impression that the shadow was actually howling right there on the wall.

Yuji couldn't sit still anymore. He scrambled out of his sleeping bag with a giggle, crawling on all fours to get closer, "Me too! Lemme try!"

He sat across from him at the other end of the wall. Shooting his hands up, he tried to mimic the hand sign, but it didn't come nearly as well as he expected it to. Next to the intricate, living artwork of Fushiguro's technique, Yuji’s shadow looked more like some shabby stray dog than a wolf.

And yet, Fushiguro indulged him all the same. Without uttering a single word, he twitched his fingers, and the shadow on the wall morphed into a wolf just like his own, if not a little fluffier. The two wolves sat across from each other, surrounded by cracks and scratches in the stone. He tried to copy Fushiguro's hand movements to make his shadow-puppet howl, but the figure remained still, completely unaffected.

A stifled chuckle came from the other side. Baffled, Yuji cocked his head and looked to Fushiguro for help, but found only the image of him sitting there with his shoulders shaking.

"Nice try, dumbass," Fushiguro ducked his head, clutching his stomach, "You know, I would gladly hand the technique over to you if I could."

"Oh, right," Yuji laughed with him, a bit too loud, and scratched his neck, "Yeah, that does make sense."

Fushiguro lifted his face to reveal that gorgeous, subtle smile. His face was flushed just a bit, warmed even more by the flames from the fire pit. He looked so beautiful, so delighted by his idiocy, that Yuji would gladly be a fool for the rest of his life just to see him smile again.

"Any other requests?" He cocked his head to the side, and suddenly, the other wolf sprang to life as well. It spun around itself, tail wagging behind in excitement as Yuji bounced in his seat.

"Let them fight! Come on, do it, do it–" Yuji clenched his free fist, raising it higher with each word as he leaned in with a giddy laugh.

"At least try to say please," Fushiguro muttered, but reached his hand out anyway.

His shadow wolf followed after him, slowly trotting ahead despite all the cracks in the wall distorting its shape just a bit. Yuji crawled forward, his hand shooting out as he guided his own puppet closer, eyes following the two shadows as they were drawn towards each other.

They met, noses grazing as they ruffled against each other in soft affection rather than a brutal fight. The fluffier wolf licked at the other's muzzle, while the other one rested its jaw over the fluffy one's head. Yuji wouldn't get to question him, his mind going blank. It was hard to focus on the shadows when all his senses were stolen away by the electrifying sensation of Fushiguro's palm pressing against his own.

According to every law of physics that Yuji didn't know shit about, Fushiguro's skin shouldn't feel as warm as it did. And yet it was, and he accepted it greedily, even if it was just his touch-starved mind playing tricks on him. Fushiguro's long fingers slid between his, interlacing tightly, and suddenly nothing else mattered.

After the whole day of being apart, it was as if Yuji had lived an entire lifetime without ever having touched him. He never wanted to go this long without being near him, without having his fingers cover the stumps on his hand, and without Fushiguro's fingers pressing into the dips between his knuckles, filling the empty spaces of his hand perfectly.

"Itadori."

No, please.

"Look at me."

Yuji hesitated, eyes digging into the wall still. He could tell just by the tone of his voice that whatever he was about to say to him would shatter the little peace they made. Yuji didn't want to go back to that distance between them, heavy with things neither wanted to say out loud.

It was just them in their own little world, two interlaced hands casting a single shadow. It didn't matter if that peace was real or not– as long as they believed it was, it would make it so.

The shadows morphed in the blink of an eye, and Yuji wasn't looking at a pair of wolves anymore. He watched the shadow of a hand pull, and then his own body was dragged along with it, landing heavily on his knees between Fushiguro’s legs.

Fushiguro caught him, his hand wrapping around Yuji's neck, "It isn't just a nightmare, is it?"

​Yuji couldn't pretend not to hear anymore. When their eyes met, Fushiguro's gaze was so calm and yet so sure that he felt himself come right under it.

"It's okay, I told you," Yuji gently pushed the hand at his neck away, "It doesn't matter."

Fushiguro didn't let him go, grabbing onto Yuji’s forearm with furrowed brows, "Don't say that. Of course it does."

"It doesn't, Fushiguro," Yuji tore it out of his grip, stumbling back as he got to his feet, "It won't change anything, even if I tell you."

It will just hurt you even more. More than everything I’ve already done to you.

Fushiguro ducked his head, the dark spikes falling over his face. His hand slowly dropped to the ground, and seeing him all slumped over like that made Yuji regret ever leaving his side. But the moment was gone, and now that reality hit him again, the disappointment washed over him like the downpour outside.

"Do you not trust me anymore?" Came the weak reply.

"I do," Yuji said. There was no hesitation. The answer would always be the same. "Of course I do. Always."

"What is it, then? And don't lie to me," Fushiguro snapped, sounding more confused than angry, "You think I didn't notice how you're letting me walk all over you? How you can't sleep at night, and you barely eat anymore? I don't want to hear another dumb ass excuse again."

"I'll get over it," He whispered, turning away from him, "I'm doing it all for you, I swear."

"You think seeing you like this without knowing what's going on will make me feel better?" The bitterness seeped out from his voice like venom, and Yuji couldn't help but shiver, "That I'll be grateful when you roll over and die, and all I'm left with is I did it all for you? Fuck you."

"I won't–"

"At least try to hide it when you look at me," Fushiguro cut him off.

"Please, stop."

"At least try to pretend," He hissed, "That looking at me doesn't make you sick."

"It's because of me!" The scream tore out of his throat. The sound of the rain muffled out his ragged breath, "It has nothing to do with you!"

Fushiguro went still. Slowly, he stood up, "So, you do remember."

Yuji let his head fall back against the wall, feeling the cold stone dig into the side of his skull, "I couldn't forget it even if I tried."

He couldn't hide it anymore– not with Fushiguro's voice trembling because of him, not with the twitch of his lip laced with all that confusion. But even worse than that was the deep, settling sorrow in his eyes, begging for an explanation Yuji didn't want to give.

Yuji didn't realize just how much acting like nothing was happening could make Fushiguro start doubting just how much he meant to him. And he meant everything.

Every break of Yuji's heart and every mended muscle existed because of him. Every punch Yuji threw, every drop of blood he spilled, he did just to ensure he would see his face again. His mind was full of him, longing for him while asleep and thankful for his presence while awake.

Fushiguro was his blessing, the proof that he could be forgiven for all that he had done, and the curse that reminded him of his sins. And yet, Yuji would gladly live with that pain, if only to watch him exist and breathe in the same air.

His voice trembled as he spoke, "It's always the same. I see you, Fushiguro, standing right in front of me– so much smaller, and untouched by any scars. But you're just as spiky and annoyed as always, if not more."

Yuji laughed bitterly, "The little you cocks his head at me, scrunching your nose like I just told the dumbest joke you've ever heard. I want to reach out and take you away, to pull you to safety, to tell you to come back–"

He looked at his outstretched hand as it appeared in the nightmare, squeezing the stumps of his ring and promise finger together– the one promise he broke and the future he gave up on to save him.

"The image blurs before my eyes, but I know you're there. I don't know if it's the tears or something else that pulls you away from me. I start talking, and as I do, I realize it's pointless." Yuji swallowed hard, feeling the words get stuck in his throat, "So I beg. I beg, and I pray that you take pity on me, and come back anyway. For me."

Even while dreaming, Yuji couldn't help but be selfish; even while awake, he seemed destined to repeat the same mistakes. How could he claim to understand Fushiguro's pain, to feel it himself, only to completely ignore it for his own comfort?

"But you don't. You disappear, and all I'm left with is nothing. I look at my hand, and the two stumps start to throb, reminding me of how I failed. I look at them when I wake up, after, and it feels like I failed you still."

Now saying it out loud, Yuji realized maybe the real nightmare wasn't the one he saw while falling asleep. Maybe the part that scared him the most was waking up and it becoming true– that Fushiguro would regret coming back to him. That he would leave him alone again.

"I'm sorry, Fushiguro." Yuji sniffed, his fingers clawing at his chest as if trying to rip his useless heart out, "I told you back then that I couldn't ask you to keep going, but I lied. I did it anyway. I wanted you to come back for me, even if you already gave up."

"You–" Fushiguro finally muttered from behind him, "Did you really think I'd get mad if you said it? Me, of all people?"

"Then why are you pushing me away?" A big drop of cold water splashed against Yuji's nape, but this time, he didn't flinch at the sting it left, "It's not just the mission, is it? I'm sorry. I'm sorry that Kusakabe dragged you out here with me."

"Itadori, stop," Fushiguro called out. It sounded more like a plea than a command.

"I'm sorry that I broke that dumb tent. I'm sorry about the stupid jokes," Yuji rambled on, not even listening to the words that came out of his mouth, "I'm sorry for not taking things seriously enough, for being dumb–"

"It's not like that."

"I just wanted us to be happy again," He choked out, "Please, don't hate me, Fushiguro. I'm sorry, I'm–"

"I'm afraid."

It didn't make sense at first. Yuji thought he might have misheard him while drowning in his own pathetic sorrow, but when he turned around, the look on Fushiguro's face told him just that. His shaking pupils, the sweat dripping down his neck, and his bleeding lip from having bitten into it too hard.

"I don't hate you, Itadori– I can't hate you." He stepped just a bit closer, carefully, as if walking towards a wounded animal ready to scurry away before it could be helped, "No matter what idiotic thing you do, and no matter how much you make it easy to hate you with all that protecting me from myself type of crap. I'm… I'm just afraid."

"Afraid?" Yuji repeated, but the voice that came out didn't feel like his own. He rushed forward, almost tumbling over his own legs, "Fushiguro, I would never let that thing even try to breathe in your direction. I would split this mountain open if it meant keeping you safe. I'd do everything in my power–"

Fushiguro cut him off, "That's the problem, Itadori."

"Why?" He tried to reach out and cup his face, desperate to reassure him, "You don't believe me? I can do it, Fushiguro, I will–"

Fushiguro caught his wrist before it touched him, pulling it away with a glare, "Don't you understand? I don't want to be the goddamn damsel in distress that you need to come and save. I'm fucking tired of it."

He threw Yuji's hand to the side, staring bitterly into the fire pit, "But the truth is, it will always be like this. I can't reach your level. I will always lag behind you, dragging you down, because I don't have it in me to try."

"That's bullshit, and you know it!" Yuji shoved him back with one hand, only to regret it and instantly grab his shoulder with the other, "You're just being too negative! You are so strong already, Fushiguro, and you can always grow–"

Fushiguro moved in closer, his fingers grazing against Yuji's forearm softly, "I don't want to get stronger, Itadori."

Yuji swallowed hard, his breath becoming faster, "You don't have to, then." The finger dragging up his arm left a burning trail on his skin, "You don't have to do anything that you don't want to anymore, alright? I'll take care of everything that you don't want to do. I'll get stronger for the both of us, and for everyone else–"

The finger was just a decoy. The slight graze turned into a firm grip as Fushiguro's palm wrapped around the back of his neck, tugging him closer. Once they were touching noses, and Yuji could feel his heart ready to burst out, Fushiguro slid both hands up to cradle his face.

"I don't want you to get stronger, either." He dug his thumbs into Yuji's cheeks. His warm breath washed over Yuji's face, and looking into the green eyes, Yuji felt himself being swallowed whole until every part of him couldn't think of anything else but the boy in front of him.

"I want you to leave it all behind," Fushiguro whispered, "For me."

Yuji's mouth opened, just to close again a second later. The words rang in his head, beating against his skull to make him understand, but he couldn't. Not with him being barely able to breathe, chest heaving as he looked to Fushiguro's eyes for an answer, or an explanation– just to find nothing, only a dull shadow of that shining jade he'd grown to know.

"The only reason I became a sorcerer was to protect the people I cared about, but now there's just… you. I have no one else left to worry about." His voice was flat, devoid of any emotions, as if stating the most obvious truth and not the worst thing Yuji might have ever heard from him. "Sukuna is gone, too. You don't need to fight anymore, either. The rest of them can take care of whatever curses are left."

"I don't understand," Yuji shook his head frantically, his bottom lip trembling. He didn't want to understand.

"Itadori– nothing is holding us back there anymore." Fushiguro's fingertips scraped against his scalp, and he couldn't deny the meaning of his words anymore, no matter how sick they were, "We don't have to go back to Jujutsu High. We can just take what we have and run away from it all. No one will look for us– and even if they do, they won't be able to stop us."

Fushiguro leaned in, pressing a trembling kiss against the bridge of his nose. It felt wrong, and anything but like every other kiss he had ever given him. Yuji shoved his hands between them, desperate to push him back.

But then Fushiguro's cold lips began leaving a trail of wet, shivering pecks all over his face, and the urge to fight him died out. There was nothing soft or loving about them, and Yuji hated himself for leaning in and wanting more of them, despite knowing that.

"Just imagine it, Yuji," Fushiguro leaned to the side, his lips grazing against Yuji’s ear, "We can find ourselves a little cottage in the woods and settle in, or rent some small apartment in a town. We could move to a city, or maybe stay in the countryside while everything else passes us by."

His hands drifted down, one rubbing on Yuji's neck while the other wrapped around his waist. The touch burned his skin, but whether it was from anguish or longing, Yuji couldn't tell anymore.

"We could grow a garden. Eat home-cooked meals every single day. We'd get a dog or two and take them for a stroll every morning. And then," He whispered, hand going up to tug at Yuji's hoodie, "We’d spend the rest of the day doing nothing. Without a single care in the world."

Fushiguro pushed him down, and Yuji's back hit the dirt with a groan. He followed after him to the ground, trapping Yuji's head between his hands, face looming directly over his, "It would be just the two of us. I'd play with your hair, or lie on your chest, or sit in your lap."

Fushiguro's words were so sweet. So beautiful that Yuji could almost see the vision with his eyes right in front of him– if not for the empty smile behind them, which held none of that affection.

"And I'd kiss you all over," His voice came out in a low whisper, scattering whatever thoughts there may have been left in Yuji's mind.

"On the lips," Fushiguro's lips pressed against his own. It was warm and tender now, but with the dark wisps of hair brushing against his skin, Yuji wasn't sure if it really was as fond as he prayed it was, or perhaps his mind gave up on questioning it.

He pulled apart with a smack of their lips, and Yuji let out a needy whine, lifting his chin to meet him again. Fushiguro just growled a half-laugh, cupping his face and forcing it down.

"On your cheek," His nose pressed against Yuji's cheek, nibbling the skin between his teeth. Yuji kicked his feet, clenching his hands onto Fushiguro's shirt to stop the urge to force his sweet lips back onto his own.

He missed him, and he needed him, and he desperately wanted him to do everything he promised he would, even if he didn't mean it.

"On every scratch on your body," The sensation of Fushiguro's cold hands slipping under the hem of his hoodie, and then tracing lines over his hot abdomen as he sucked a bruise on his neck, sent a shiver down Yuji's spine.

He didn't even know if the scratches Fushiguro's fingers followed were real or if all the strokes he made were just excuses to have him go crazy.

"Until you'd beg me to stop."

And then he pulled back, taking away everything and leaving him with nothing but the suffocating feeling of being alone again. Yuji stared up at him, dazed. He would never beg him to stop– he could only beg him to stay and never leave again.

"And you could do anything you ever wanted," Fushiguro’s fingers moved deliberately, undoing the top two buttons of his shirt and leaving just a bit of his neck and collarbones exposed as he hung over him. The skin was flushed and so perfectly smooth, and Yuji knew it would feel just as nice as it looked under his lips, "Wouldn't you like that?"

Of course, Yuji would like that. That twisted look on Fushiguro's face showed he knew it just as well, if not a little too well.

It was wrong– so incredibly wrong that Yuji felt sick just considering it. How could he leave everyone behind– all the people at Jujutsu High, all the people who continue to suffer at the hands of curses, just to chase the sick satisfaction of feeling Fushiguro's chest pressed against his own?

Just to run away to god knows where, to live out his fantasy? To spend the rest of their lives together, and to grow old together with him, just to peacefully die at his side? No, he shouldn't even think about it. The more he did, the better it sounded, and the closer he was to considering it.

"Nothing could ever hurt you again." He raised Yuji's hand to his lips, leaving open-mouthed kisses all over the bruised knuckles, desperation seeping in his voice. Those green eyes gazed at him with such hope and fear, and Yuji quickly realized he was just as desperate for him, if not more.

"I'd make you forget all about it, Yuji." He leaned in, and with every inch closer, he planted a kiss on Yuji's arm, traveling slowly up to his shoulder. His fingers tangled in Yuji's hair, nails scratching against his skull until it stung.

"Everything." Fushiguro breathed out, his voice thin and on the verge of giving out.

He pressed a finger into the corner of Yuji's mouth, his nail slowly tracing the scar as his gaze bore into him. The other trembling hand hovered above, brushing a thumb over the wound between the ridges of his eyebrows.

Yuji understood that the same pain was wound into the face falling apart in front of him. And then leaned in. Their lips met, soft and urgent as if sealing the promise of forever. This time, Yuji wouldn't let him go– not until he made him forget about it all as well.

His hand lunged toward the dark hair, fingers burying deep and bringing Fushiguro's head closer with a sharp tug. He rolled him over, pinning him to the ground, and Fushiguro groaned, wrapping his arms tight around Yuji's neck before sucking on his lower lip.

The storm died out, or maybe he just couldn't hear it anymore over the wet sound of their sloppy kiss echoing against the stone walls, every click of their tongues coming back twice as loud.

He would do it. He would leave it all behind if Fushiguro wanted him to. For every kiss and every flutter of his eyelashes, and for every time their skin brushed against each other. For every pained cry, and every tremble of his lip, and every tear brimming in his eyes. Yuji would discard it all for him without thinking, reject every possibility in which he didn't, and make it so that only the cave and they remained.

He would be happy with that.

Fushiguro writhed beneath him, legs tangling with Yuji’s as he arched into the touch. Yuji's hand slipped under his waist, fitting there as if it were made just for him to hold. He finally felt warm again– not from the fire crackling beside them, but from the pure delight of being needed by the one person he couldn't bear to lose.

It didn't matter if other people needed him too. The only thing that mattered was making Fushiguro happy, keeping him alive by his side even if the rainstorm outside tore everything apart. They could forget about it all– forget about the pain and overlook the memories etched in their skin, and pretend that the world is just them and the fire keeping them alive.

That should make him happy.

The others would be fine without them. Kugisaki wouldn't care that they were gone– she would curse them out once, get over it quickly, and go back to being herself. And even if Yuji wouldn't get to argue with her anymore, or carry her bags as they went shopping, or steal her eyepatch when she wasn't looking– he would get over missing it, too.

Eventually, he would forget what the scars on his face meant. All the lives lost by his existence, the curse that once resided in his mind, and all the people who stood by his side despite that.

He would forget and move on with his life, leaving behind all the ghosts of the past who shaped him into who he was now. The suffering he promised to carry on for them, and all the memories of them that gave them life, even if they were gone now. The people he cared about, and who cared about him, until their last dying breath.

It should ease the burden of his soul. It should be enough.

Why can't he be happy with that?

Yuji didn't notice when his lips stopped moving. He pulled back, wrapping his arms around Fushiguro to sit them upright.

Fushiguro froze. Then, in a burst of panic, he tried to lean in again, his fingers grabbing Yuji's chin with too much force to urge him closer– but Yuji couldn't pretend there was anything but hopelessness in his touch anymore. He brought his hand up, pressing his palm firmly against Fushiguro's lips to stop him.

"We can't," Yuji whispered, looking into his eyes to make him understand, "We can't stay here."

Fushiguro's body tensed instantly, and the grip on Yuji's chin tightened enough to hurt. He looked down, letting out a shaky breath, and let his hands fall to clench tight onto the collar of Yuji's hoodie.

"Why?" He gritted out, his face hardening to hide any hint of emotion it might have revealed.

Yuji didn't fight, letting the collar cut into his neck. He would make him understand, even if it destroyed them both, "I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I did."

"Why!" A raw, broken scream tore out of his throat, echoing in the cave. Fushiguro shoved him to the ground, shaky fist still in the air as his face contorted. Yuji knew he couldn't soothe this with soft words or gentle touches– not unless he gave in to the plea.

"Because there are people who need our help!" He shouted back from the ground. There was no anger behind it, only hope that it would get through to him, "We're the only ones who can do that–"

"I don't care. We didn't choose to be sorcerers!" His jade eyes seized with anger, the only crack in the indifferent facade on his face, "We paid for our mistakes already, didn't we? We gave everything we had!"

The words came out in a rush, his whole body shaking as if they tore right out of him, "Is the only way for us to go is to keep fighting, just because we're the only ones who can? To keep going until we die like the rest of them?"

He snatched his uniform from the ground, clenching the material in his hands as he bit on his lip. His hand shot up, and with one violent swing, he hurled it right into the fire, "That's bullshit!"

The flames surged into a tower of red for a split second before instantly vanishing under the weight of the jacket. Yuji crawled over to the pit blindly, hands reaching out to grasp it in the suffocating darkness before the fire gave out.

The hot fabric brushed under his fingers, and he snatched it back, clutching it to his chest. The dark cave lit up again as the pit gasped back to life, but the flame had grown weak, on the verge of dying out. Yuji leaned in and blew at it desperately, tossing the rest of their wood scraps to keep it going.

"We don't owe anything to anyone."

Fushiguro grabbed his arm, pulling him back from the fire and forcing Yuji to look at him. The light from the rising flames shone over his face, revealing utter detachment etched into every crevice of his skin, "And even if we do, I don't care."

Yuji clutched the uniform tighter, the cold metal button digging painfully into his palm, "…Is that what you really think, Fushiguro?"

It was there, if only for a moment. A single tremble of his lip, and a split second of hesitation before the sneer plastered itself over Fushiguro’s face, "Why wouldn't it be?"

"Because if you really meant that," Yuji snatched his hand back, his voice rising. He would break that mask of indifference, smash it with his bare fist until it became nothing, "You wouldn't be here!"

He shot up, whipping the material over his shoulder and through the air. The jacket slapped against Fushiguro's chest before sliding down to his feet, but he didn't flinch. Not even when Yuji lunged forward, grabbing the collar of his shirt with both hands and hauling him close.

"If you didn't care for anyone else, you'd leave! You could just pack your bags and disappear, and yet, you stayed!"

Yuji pulled him forward just to push him away, shaking him as Fushiguro braced against him, eyebrows knitted together in a frown, "You apologised to everyone! You promised Kurusu you would be there for her if she needed you! And you kept going on missions, saving people just like always, even if you didn't have a reason for it anymore!"

"It doesn't matter!" Fushiguro snapped, finally shoving Yuji’s hands off his chest.

"Then why did you stay?" He gritted out, grabbing his collar again.

"Shut up!"

"Answer me!"

The fire roared behind them as they clashed, shoving each other back and forth. Suddenly, Yuji felt his footing give way, sending him slipping toward the ground. Fushiguro's eyes widened instantly, and even though he had looked ready to kill him just a second earlier, his grip on Yuji's hoodie tightened, pulling him forward by the collar.

Yuji collided into his chest with an exhale, and they froze, the sounds of their panting merging over the thunder. He looked up, but Fushiguro wasn't looking at him. His gaze, filled with pure loathing, was fixed on the slightly charred jacket tangled with Yuji's shoes.

With one flick of his wrist, the jacket was blasted to the other end of the cave. The explosive force of Fushiguro's cursed energy propelled it through the air, tearing into the dirt and leaving behind a trail.

Yuji let out a shaky breath, still feeling the sting of the sharp energy that had brushed past his face, "Fushiguro–"

"I stayed, because I don't want you to end up like him, Itadori!" Fushiguro gritted out, hand lunging back towards Yuji's collar.

Him.

There were eight billion people alive in the world. If he didn't know any better, Yuji could play dumb and pretend he didn't know which him Fushiguro meant.

If he didn't see Fushiguro's face– all the resentment and the attachment mixed into the ghost of a single, confusing expression he wore every time his name was mentioned in passing, Yuji might have confused him for someone else.

If he had never seen that haunting look in Fushiguro's eyes, lingering on the family name etched into the memorial stone when he thought no one was watching, Yuji could have believed it wasn't him who still weighed on his mind.

And ever since that day he came back, he wouldn't say his name. It became a taboo, like an open secret that no one dared mention to him for fear of reawakening that guilt again.

It was never Gojo-sensei, it was just him.

"Even if it saves the whole damn world. Fuck that," He spat the words out. His face contorted into a grimace, as if even saying the words out loud seared his tongue, "I can't take you carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders and suffering while putting on a smile. I can't take people expecting you to risk your life just because you can, and will."

He looked down, his shaking hands still on the collar of Yuji's hoodie, "But when I look at you…I can't help but think it's bound to happen. I don't want you to be like him. I don't want you to leave me behind, because I can't follow you there."

Yuji covered Fushiguro’s trembling hands with his own, squeezing them lightly, "Fushiguro…"

"I want you, Itadori. Not Itadori Yuji, the sorcerer. My Itadori Yuji." Fushiguro shook his head, still fighting against him, "The person who gives my shitty life meaning. The one I'm willing to wake up in the morning for, knowing the whole world will fuck me over as always, just so that I can see him. Alive and breathing in front of me."

Fushiguro leaned in, his forehead pressing against Yuji's shoulder. He released the grip on his collar.

"You can't leave me. Not after telling me you needed me. Not after making me believe we could live," His breaking voice came out muffled against the fabric, "So just stay here at the bottom with me, Itadori. Stay where nothing can take you away. Where we can pretend nothing can hurt us as long as we look at each other and nowhere else."

Yuji buried his face in the dark hair. Any other time, the scent of dirt and damp moss would have overwhelmed him, but right now, all he could smell was the lingering scent of rain and sweat– the familiar scent of their morning runs, their daily routine waiting for them, and of their life outside of the cave walls without the need to keep the fire alive.

"Even if everything around us goes to shit, I will be fine as long as I have you," Fushiguro's head moved up, and he murmured against his neck, "I'll make you happy, I promise. So stay. Please."

Fushiguro smelled like home, and safety, and like the one place he would always return to. The place where he had left his heart for safekeeping– tucked into Fushiguro's trembling palms, woven into each strand of his hair, and lingering in every touch they had ever shared.

"Would living a boring life with me be so bad?" Fushiguro whispered, letting his hands slip out of Yuji's gentle grip, "Does it have to have some deeper meaning to make it worth it to you?"

"Megumi," Yuji laughed, his voice soft and sweet as the name rolled off his tongue.

He had shown him the truth, perhaps without even meaning to, and Yuji understood it now. They had been fighting against each other since the moment they set out, not knowing their hearts had been beating for the same cause all along.

"Every life is worth it," Yuji said, wrapping his arms around him, "Even if all we did was shit, sleep, and eat all day until we turned old and ugly."

​He pulled back just enough to look him in the eyes, "It's living in ignorance, acting like all the bad things don't exist just because we don't see them, that would never make me truly happy."

They were both stuck in their cycle of suffering, so different yet all the same. While Yuji mourned the past, consumed by the flames of guilt over what could have been had fate spun a different course, Fushiguro tried to make the fire go out before he could ever know what it meant to be burned by it.

​"Whose thoughts are these, Itadori?" Fushiguro muttered, pressing his palm against Yuji's chest, right over the beating heart, "The human in you, or the sorcerer's?"

​"Both. Because it's the same person." Yuji muttered softly, "I'm not just a sorcerer, Megumi, and neither are you."

He lifted Fushiguro's chin, watching as his dark lashes fluttered open, "We're people first."

Fushiguro scoffed, doubt laced in his gaze, "What difference does it make?"

"You tell me."

Yuji stumbled back, dragging Fushiguro down to the ground with him. His back hit the sleeping bag, absorbing the impact of the fall. Fushiguro didn't resist. He went limp as Yuji shifted, rolling them over until he was pressed into the fabric and Yuji was looming over him, blocking out the rest of the cave.

​"Isn't that why you came back?" Yuji's face hovered right over his, refusing to let him look away, "Because you know there are people out there worth saving? People worth risking your life for?"

Fushiguro looked up at him, lifting his fingers to brush Yuji's cheek, "You're that person, Itadori."

​"I know," Yuji tilted his head, thumb rising to caress the scar clawed into Fushiguro's skin, "But I'm not the only one in this world blessed by your love, am I?"

Fushiguro stopped, letting his hand hang in the air. His gaze softened, losing its focus for a moment. Yuji knew that behind that shadow in his mind, the one obscuring the things he was too afraid to see, lay the memory of all the people who gave their all to bring him back.

​"It will never be just us. There will always be people around– strangers with their own dreams, loves, and hopes," Yuji said, pressing his forehead against Fushiguro's and shaking his head gently, "And I want all of them to live on, no matter how small or insignificant they might seem. That's what I'll use my strength for."

His strength. The power he had grown, built on the pillars of all the people who gave up their lives to protect him. Their memory, their legacy, and all the feelings they brought into this world and left behind– it was all molded into the shape of his soul.

"I want you to live on, too." Yuji swept the unruly bangs, planting a soft kiss on his temple, "Not trapped in your fears, hiding from what could be if we continue down this path– but looking past it, and seeing all the good things that make it worth remembering the shitty ones for."

Yuji couldn't forget the past. Fushiguro had made him realize that. It would always come back to haunt him– whether it be in his nightmares, where he can't help but watch it happen again, or while awake, with the pain it caused still carved into his skin.

"What if I can't do that?" Fushiguro whispered, his voice barely audible over the drumming of the rain.

But behind the scars and the echoes was something far stronger than the fear. It was the bright light of their present– living in all the quiet moments they shared by the graves, remembering those they loved. In the faces of their friends, sharing the same pain as theirs, but finding a reason to smile despite it all.

"Then I'll go with you."

He would make Fushiguro understand. Even if it took days, months, or years to get it through to him. Yuji would stay by his side until he realized that no fantasy could ever replace all the things they had bled for. No peace could ever replace the noise of the people they were willing to fight for.

Fushiguro's eyes widened, "…After saying all that?"

"Yeah," He let out a soft laugh, dropping his head to rest next to Fushiguro's, "Because you are my dream, my love, and my hope. I can't leave you, no matter which way you go."

The storm outside had long died out, leaving only the rain to wash away the havoc it once caused. Yuji looked into the fire pit as it crackled, the soft light now straining his weary eyes. He wrapped his arm around Fushiguro, tugging him closer. A soft groan left the other boy's lips as he pressed his head into the crook of Yuji's neck, melting into the embrace.

"But only if that's what you truly want." Yuji mumbled, the wisps of dark hair grazing against his lips as he spoke, "Only if you're sure that running away will make you happy."

He would never give up on trying to drag him out of the depths. Until it was his own choice to leave it behind, and not one mandated by his fears, he would keep fighting for him.

The roar of the downpour slowly faded into a distant hum, and Yuji nuzzled deeper into the warmth of the sleeping bag.

​As he waited for an answer, he wondered what would greet him outside the cave come morning– Fushiguro's outstretched hand, waiting for Yuji to follow him into the unknown, or one meant for Yuji to pull, asking to be led back home?

The spoken answer never came. A soft, weary nod against his chest was the last thing he felt before drifting off to sleep.

They stood outside, the sun beaming down on them from a clear blue sky. If not for all the broken branches and snapped trunks scattered all around, there wouldn't be a single sign that a storm had ever passed by the mountain. A few birds flew over their heads, high by the trees, chirping a bright song that almost fooled Yuji into thinking spring may have arrived early.

"So," Yuji swung the backpack over his shoulder with newfound strength, finally having experienced a night of peaceful sleep in weeks. He brought the broken compass closer, watching the needle tremble in the direction of the south, "Have you decided?"

The heart skipped for a second after asking, before returning to normal. He should have been more concerned about possibly having to throw away life as he knew it, and yet, there was no fear. He would go through with his promise, no matter what Fushiguro would choose.

Fushiguro looked down at the ground, the unzipped jacket of his uniform swaying gently in the breeze, "I have."

Yuji came up next to him, close enough that their shoulders brushed. Fushiguro raised his head, gazing far ahead into the distance of the mountain. He went back to his usual stoic expression, but this time, the calm was tinged with a trace of uncertainty.

Yuji slipped his hand into his to reassure him, letting their fingers intertwine softly.

"I want that peaceful life with you, Itadori," Fushiguro closed his eyes, blinded by the bright sunbeams, "I want to walk through the countryside with you. I want to watch the sun rise over rice fields and come back to a home we built together. I want that to be the only thing I know, and the only thing I have to remember."

Yuji didn't say anything. He nodded, gripping his hand tighter.

"But more than that…" Fushiguro muttered, the wind blowing the wisps of hair from his face to reveal a dreamy look, "I want to wake up in the morning and drink my coffee with all the idiots back at the dorms arguing in the kitchen. To have Kugisaki yell at you for talking about some dumb movie, and you sticking your tongue out on the side she can't see."

Yuji grinned, a teary giggle slipping out of his lips at the thought.

Fushiguro squeezed his hand back, "I want to read that idiot's letter again and laugh just like I did the first time. I want to visit Tsumiki's grave and tell her how much I miss her. I want to tell her how much she would have loved you."

And then he finally faced him. The corner of his lips curled up into a soft smile, the sunlight grazing against the scar drawn over his face.

"To put my head on your shoulders in the back of Ijichi's car, sharing your shitty headphones. To make you run around with the Divine Dog while I watch from the side. For us to go back to my room and watch a movie while I fall asleep next to you. Again, and again, and always."

​Yuji sniffed, wiping his damp eyes on his sleeve. He reached out, cupping Fushiguro's cheek gently. Fushiguro leaned into it, nuzzling against the palm as he covered Yuji’s hand with his own.

"I want to live for others," Fushiguro whispered, "For you."

He pressed their foreheads together, dark eyelashes fluttering against Yuji's wet ones, "So don't you dare die on me. If you do–"

"I know," Yuji silenced him with a kiss, grinning into it as he pulled away. Before Fushiguro could even think of changing his mind, he tugged on his arm towards the lit-up path through the forest. He had chosen.

"You will kill me yourself, right?"