Chapter Text
„How did I get here?”
There Connie was, fantasising about the same girl. It’s been like this for months now, she just can’t let go of this damn crush. Was it still a crush? She’s felt like this for such a long time, almost a year, and she wouldn’t mind waiting longer. She was so used to hiding from herself that she’s become comfortable with the silence in her own mind one she shuts herself down. Of course there’s worse ways to deal with it, and those ways she’s ashamed of. Those ways left permanent scarring on both her both and mind, along with her friends’ minds, and worse - Myra’s. She still remembers that night, as hazy as it was. Myra was the one that found her. In that god forsaken bathtub.
Connie shakes the thoughts off again, and decides to take a shower, one to clear her thoughts, a cold one. She grabs an old t shirt, pyjama pants, a hairbrush and towel and proceeds to head to her shared bathroom. She looks at the sink - her side is clean, a small bit of makeup still out from this morning. Connie then looks at her brothers side, utter disaster.
“Oh my god..” she says under her breath before hollering for her brother
“Elliot! Come pick up the bathroom, I’m not showering like this!”
Connie hears a groan, followed by footsteps approaching the bathroom as Elliot enters, clearly tired. She watches as the caramel-haired boy puts his things away, then gives her a look that says “done. Now leave me alone.” Connie watched as her brother leaves and walks back to his room, leaving the bathroom door open. Of course. Can nobody close doors around here? She starts the water, only turning the knob a little bit, ensuring ice-cold water. She waits for a few minutes, and as she waits, she stares into the mirror. Into her own eyes, her eyes grazer her skin, her hair, and suddenly it’s like she was aware she was a person again. Obviously she knew she was a person, but sometimes it can be hard to feel yourself when you’re experiencing thoughts that aren’t your own. She snaps out of her tunnel vision-like haze, her eyes landing on the shower curtain.
As she planned, the water was cold, and her thoughts were consumed with the feel of the thudding water against her skin, her plan really worked. Her thoughts were surrounded with how cold the shower was, and not her past. Her future.
After around ten minutes, she steps out, putting on the change of clothes after she dried off.
── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──
The next day, Connie is walking to her 3rd period class. One of the classes she had with her. As she walks in and sets her bag on her desk, a figure comes behind her and taps her on the shoulder, followed by a giggle as Connie turns to see Myra, beaming at her.
“Oh- Hey Myr-“
“Are you free after school?”
Connie blinks. Then quickly nods her head “Uh- Yes!- yes..I am.”
“Good. Wanna come over?”
Connie tried to ignore the way her ears burned red. Going to Myra’s house? God this is so cliche. Well, they were best friends. They’ve hung out before obviously, but only really at Connie’s own house. She’s never been to Myra’s house that’s for anything other than quickly grabbing a coat or a bag that Myra forgot. She almost forgot to answer the question, just staring into the blonde’s eyes.
“Of course..yeah, I’d love to.”
“Good!! You can just come over around 5.”
“Good, sounds good.”
As the bell ring, Myra walked off to her seat as Connie sat at her own, still processing the new plans for later that day.
── ⋆⋅𖤓⋅⋆ ──
Connie rung on the doorbell, fiddling with the strap of her messenger bag that held her notebook- the one she wrote her stories in, her pager she got last Christmas, her sketchbook and lipgloss. She waited for around a minute or two until she heard the door unlock and open, her heart pounding out of her chest.
“Hey!” The same smile from that morning shone at her, and she watched as Myra opened the door wider, inviting her in.
Connie walked into the house, taking in the atmosphere. It’s clear that something had been cooked up recently, the smell of herbs, vegetables and freshly cooked meat filled her nostrils. “Thanks for inviting me over.”
“Anytime! You wanna head up to my room?” Myra watched Connie nod her head and grabbed her hang, leading her upstairs.
As they entered Myra’s room, Connie looked around at the decor. A few movie posters - ET, Mean Girls, 500 days of summer, and a few other posters of movies and shows she didn’t recognise. There were lots of lamps, and a small flower rug slightly under her baby pink beanbag. She mentioned how much she loves that thing, Connie thought to herself. Myra sat down on her bed, patting a stop next to her, inviting Connie to sit with her. The brunette sat down, her heart still hammering.
“Do you mind if I put on some music?” Myra asked
“Of course not, go ahead.”
Myra got up, grabbing the cassette player off her dresser and inserted a cassette that Connie couldn’t quite read the name of. As the blonde hits play, a whirring down it heard with a bit of snapping, Myra quickly scrambles to get the tape out.
“Damn it, I always forget to rewind these things.”
Connie chuckles as she lets her gaze take over Myra’s appearance. She usually looks for put together, not that Connie minded, if anything she was glad that Myra felt comfortable with her like that. Her hair was down, a bit frizzy, and she was in an oversized t-shirt and sweat pants. As soon as Myra reminded the tape fully, she let it play and sat down. Suddenly, Connie’s head snaps back up at the cassette player as the familiar tune of “Apart” by The Cure begins to play.
“Wait- you like The Cure?”
“Yeah, is there something wrong with that?”
“No, not at all, I just…”
“What, you think just because I’m a token popular girl I can’t like gothic rock?”
“Well, no- I just didn’t expect—“
“It’s fine, really.” Myra lets out a spurt of giggles before going silent. It’s unclear if it’s an awkward or comfortable silence, but it’s silence nonetheless. Just as Connie did earlier, Myra lets her eyes follow Connie’s figure, her movements.
“…”
Myra mutters something that shakes Connie to her core.
“You think I didn’t notice you checking em out a few minutes ago?”