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6 months.
That was how long we lasted, me and Akira. To be fair, I never really expected us to last this long. I somewhat hoped that it would end sooner than that though. Not that I didn’t enjoy the time I spent with her. It’s just that we took things a little bit too far before we could establish ourselves as people. We found ourselves wanting to grow apart rather than together. In short, we got sick of each other… in a romantic way at least.
She’s still a good roommate, friend and classmate to have. Seeing as we’re both attending the same program and school, someone as responsible as her is rare nowadays. Not to mention, she looks beautiful.
Which leads me to the current situation: I'm living with my ex-girlfriend, Akira.
“Good morning.” She greets me with a raspy voice, coming out of her bedroom.
“Morning.” I respond, tracking her movements as she traverses the apartment going to the washroom.
She weaves across the living room barely missing the coffee table. She finally reaches the door at the other end of the house.
“I made you some coffee if you want some.” I said, cleaning the ashtray filled with cigarettes at the coffee table. The ash and dust has settled, it’s easier to dispose of when it all bundles up.
She finishes washing her face and brushing her teeth as I finish my coffee. What’s left inside the coffee pot is already cold, there wasn’t really any point to pouring one out for her.
“Thanks, but no thanks. I still have some tea-bags left.” She replied, wiping her face whilst walking across the room towards the kitchen.
That’s right, she never liked coffee. She was always a tea person. Even though the coffee’s been cold, the water I boiled was still practically hot enough for tea.
I watched as she got her tea-bag and soaked it in hot water, adding honey after a few seconds. Just the way she likes it. She notices the empty jar of sugar next to the honey.
“We’re out of sugar, huh? I better get some for you, since you like your coffee a bit sweet.” She remarked, mixing her tea religiously with her sweetness of choice.
She sat next to me on the couch in the living room. She sips her tea as I fidget my phone for a while. We never really spoke much after the break-up. Actually, we never spoke much at all. There was simply nothing to talk about, or rather, we never found common ground.
Now that I think about it, we only ever got together because it was convenient. There’s only so much restraint two young adults could have whilst being alone together for prolonged periods of time. It started with casual conversations that were too comfortable, then flirting, then turned serious after I slept with her. It was inevitable, she yearned for a kind of warmth she never had before and I looked for the comfort that having a relationship would provide.
“You know, you could use honey for coffee as well if you want something sweet. I don’t mind you using my honey.” She said, taking little sips of tea.
“Eh… I’m not really a big fan of honey. Thank you for offering your honey though. It means a lot to me.” I replied, putting my phone on the table faced up.
“There wouldn’t really be much of a difference though. I don’t understand why you would prefer sugar over honey, when it won’t change your coffee’s taste in any way?” She asks, staring down at her tea.
“I don’t know, maybe I just want my coffee to have sugar regardless. It just wouldn’t really be the same without it, even if it wouldn’t change anything.” I rebutted, slouching on the cushions.
“Hmm… I guess I would say the same for my tea. Yeah, you're right.” She says, finishing her sweetened tea.
She lights up a cigarette, then nudges at me to take one from her pack. I took one from her and lit up her stick. When it was my turn, the lighter ran out of liquid.
“Well, that’s just great” I said, sighing in frustration.
“Too bad, guess it’s time for you to quit the habit.” She remarks, huffing and puffing a huge cloud of smoke.
“Yeah maybe I should. I’ve picked the habit up way before you did anyway. I’ve had my fair share of smokes in my life.” I responded, putting the cigarette back into the pack.
“What made you pick up the habit anyway?” She asks, holding the stick in between her fingers and letting it linger.
“Well, I had my first smoke on a random weekday. Some of my friends offered it to me and I took the chance. I ended up coughing before I could even finish a heap.” I answered, grinning loosely as I told the story.
“After that I bought a pack for myself, I smoked the entire pack just because I could. By the time I finished my last cigarette, I realized that maybe I don’t need these things just to feel comfortable or relaxed. I can do those on my own.” I added, looking at Akira as I finished my sentence.
“Heh, that last cigarette must have hit you the hardest for you to have such an epiphany right after.” She responded, flicking her smoke’s ashes on the ashtray.
“Yeah, it had one hell of a face and personality too.” I replied, trying to contain my laughter.
“Well, if this was supposed to be your last time touching a cigarette…” She inhales deeply into the light and without warning, she drags me closer to her.
She landed me a kiss and blew smoke inside my mouth.
The initial taste was sweet, but I exhaled it with a bitter aftertaste. It all happened too fast, but I didn’t really mind. I have no right to complain about such things. In fact, I should be grateful that it happened. Although…
I wish her kiss lasted forever.