Work Text:
He’s thinking about Zanka again, that's not uncommon anymore, the last time the other was off his mind in some way was before he had met him. Hes been searching him out lately, something about him overwhelmingly curious, the shiny beetle he prods the belly of. And he thinks that Zanka may be hoping for it too. That same desire they shared. He cant help but look for him.
They had a fight earlier that week, Zanka had fought so desperately, and yet, his big sad, soulless eyes stared down at him like he was the pitiful one, a disgusting bug deserving to be crushed, not even worth the heel. Interesting.
But for once, there was little gratification. his eyes had trailed over the wound he'd inflicted, dark rich blood oozed out of the other, he loved how Zanka kept up with him, how he could lay his hands upon him in such a welcomed way, and especially when it was returned, he understood how he was perceived, but Zanka turned into some sort of feral, little stray every time, it was addicting, Though, this time, and while he had felt some sort of trickle of this thought for a while now, he felt odd, staring at him writhe, it wasn't a feeling he liked, and that only grew. He hated it.
Sometimes, they wouldn't even fight.
His eyes would stray from the wounds, more focused on the imprint his hands would make on the others skin, he also hates this, tearing harder and harder, until that thing that is Zanka— who would bite and snarl, was nothing but a red welt in his mind, Zanka was his favorite toy, yet with each time he willfully dug him out, he regretted ever meeting him, he missed when life was before him. When he knew what to do.
Jabber rolled his neck around, looking down. Zanka had clearly known he'd be here, as he'd known Zanka would also. The other has been getting better at standing up to him, the unpredictability of Jabber's own fighting style becoming second nature, still, as his current nature, he'd lose.
Some dusty land where the trash had ground up fine, strange wind kicking it up into the air to fall like snow. They've both been here awhile.
Zanka's Lovely Assistaff makes a satisfying smashing noise as it slams into a trash beast, twirling elegantly as she does, rebounding off into another, while a similar item, Zanka, follows her in tandem.
The last one falls. Zanka puffs out a breath, he must've intentionally separated from his group. Lovely doesn't deactivate yet, Jabber giggles at the sight, knowing its time to surprise him, letting gravity pull him away as he steps out of his hiding spot.
"Zanka my man! don't tell me you're already tired," he chortles, gleaming. Zanka stares back. riling him up is necessary, when he looks at him like this, its hard to tell whats behind those eyes. Jabber's brow ticks.
"Don't you hav' anythin better to do?" Zanka says, but he can tell how much he needs this.
“Come on, you know me better than that.”
Zanka hums “do i?” side eyeing him, it makes his teeth itch.
Jabber gets to see how Zanka fails and fails, and fails, and fails. with any other he'd grow bored, but there's something about Zanka that provides him no other feeling, his improvement feels like his own, each hit he lands on him feels well earned. It leaves a sweetness behind.
“Quit lookin at me like that,” he says instead.
“Did you take somethin weird again?” Zanka backs up, his boot gracefully waves through the sand, Lovely Assistaff gears up into her other, deliciously sharp form, he really wants it to pierce through his neck.
He steps forward.
Zanka's eyes squint at him, he seems confused. Mankira lights up and shifts.
"Wha's up with you," Zanka says, he readies himself but it looks hesitant, gripping Lovely with more force than usual. Jabber tracks the motion, zoning in on it uselessly, the words out of Zanka's mouth make him annoyed before he can even process them.
He realizes he's been quiet when Zanka's eyes scan his face, eyebrows furrowed.
"Huh?" he rolls his body, feigning indifference. Zanka lets out a 'tch'.
And then, Jabber's body moves, blades cutting through the air and making contact against Lovely with a shrill noise, metal on metal screeching like hell. Their faces are close, really close.
Zanka's own scrunches up in an ugly way, he can't even find it in himself to laugh.
He says something, he thinks, but it's drowned out by the blood rushing in his ears.
He also feels the force of her bash him away, and that maybe Zanka is yelling at him.
Jabber narrows his eyes into slits, he rushes forward again, quicker this time. But he finds himself unable to enjoy it. A feeling so strong he needs to pull his skin away from its interior and dig for it, but when he thinks about someone's fingers scraping out his evil, he thinks of Zanka's.
He knows he's obsessed with him, he hates him so much, hate isn't something he's felt in so long, not since he was a child -impact- but when he stares at the other, it's all he can think, hate. -swing- a creature so repugnant that only Jabber could love.
Love? That ones new.
A loud crack and then he feels warm on his face, seeping into his skin, it takes a moment to understand. A familiar comfort, but why. Mankira deactivates without him.
Every sensation he feels comes back one by one, peering down, Zanka, Zanka. oh wow. the other lays a strew, the floor pooling with red and pooling into the cracks. He's that delicate? He giggles, Zanka looks dead, he laughs, and he thinks he loves him.
He looks terrible. Hes been fully gutted, a horrible creature, a beautiful person made of flesh and blood, he sees all of it, down to the minute he usually doesn't stick around for. He cant live without him. That's what it is, oh, He desires every atom.
Zanka shivers, or maybe he does, intense pain likely rendering him to shock. Maybe they both are.
He stumbles over, tripping over Lovely. She cracked from the force, and in the deactivation, the metal shattered into wood splinters, the sight makes him nauseous, emotion so strong he can't bare it, some of the blood splattered on her.
He forces himself to turn away from her. He nudges him, it's supposed to be a light gesture, but he knows he fails at that, his hands leave streaks of blood on him. He tries to press gently, but his hands shake.
"Zanka.. hey, get up." his voice cracks.
Jabber's face goes blank, and he presses it into Zanka's chest, it eases him some, he didn't kill him, he knew that, Zanka's far too strong. Zanka could die, Jabber could've killed him. He definitely can't die.
His hand reaches over Zanka, he grabs the flare he knows he has, and the other toys with his hair. His eyes burn.
"Sorry..sorry, i didn't- i didn't mean it. i guess.." Hot shame flushes down to his bones, he pulls the flare trigger.
He knocks his forehead into his, staring deeply into his closed eyes, the wet from his eyes mixes with the blood on his face, dripping down onto Zanka's, making him appear as he is crying with him, the visual makes him feel strange. he sucks in the shallow breath coming from Zanka into his own lungs, taking comfort. He leaves with Lovely Assistaff in hand.
He hears distant shouting.
The med-bay is quiet, everyone having left to allow Zanka some time to sleep it off, ugly artificial flowers decorate the space, it took that Rudo kid the longest to leave, horribly angry on his behalf. Jabber heard every bit, but the reprimands seemed particularly light, likely due to the loss of Her.
He looks eerily similar to how he had before, he stares harder. hovering close to the window, Lovely accompanys him, he massages the grooves of her wood into his fingers, the prints from his rings ended up remaining in the filler he used to fix her, carving a permanent pattern of them into Zanka's staff, yet she does not judge him. Zanka's gonna be so mad at him, it'd be a welcome reaction if not for the fact he broke his vital instrument, hes not blind, he sees how much further Zanka goes for her, he shares his own feelings for Mankira, they're the same in so many ways.
"I know you're there," Zanka says, making him jump. his voice is clear, but it sounds wrong.
Jabber takes him all in, making himself visible also. Zanka still remains lying down, but his eyes are open.
There's a dullness to him so uncanny it doesn't even look like him, eyes sluggishly moving over to him, his eyes widen honing in on Lovely, Jabber can't look at him any longer.
"Ya fixed er?" he croaks, sitting up. Jabber climbs through the window and makes his way over to the bed, Zanka reaches a hand out gently, and Jabber places it into his waiting hand, their fingers brush. his long muscular fingers curl around her, and Jabber shamefully follows the movement, again. Jabber toys with his sleeve.
He doesn't know what to say, so he allows himself to stare at his face again. Zanka seems to accept that. but his eyes narrow on him again soon as he steps even closer, his hand reaches out and he places it gently on top of where he cut through, Zanka makes no movement, but he can make out the micro-movements of him, of him pressing his thumb into the repaired spot where Jabber's own fingers just were. Saliva pools into his mouth against his will.
"You're a fuckin weirdo. actin all freaky, i ain't never seen you like this," Zanka says, his face is screwed into an odd shape.
Zanka seems to work himself up, but his hands remain kind against her, how envious Jabber is of that.
"I hate people like you, can't make up their damn minds, get all sad and shit when someone actually gets hurt. As if that's not the point."
Jabber's head tilts to the side, that's a very loaded sentence, not sure how to pick it apart. the simple movement takes the fight out of Zanka for now. he sighs, Jabber's brows furrow at the sound, it's quiet for a while, the halls outside remain peaceful out of respect for him, but it just feels suffocating.
Zanka's eyes scan over him, he can't meet them directly. that manages a chuckle out of Zanka.
That definitely must hurt to do.
“We really are just a couple a’ brats arn't we? “—
—“you really do just look like some snot-nosed little kid who broke their favorite toy”
And since the fight, that fills him with an emotion that's less like guilt, he feels so incredibly pissed off. It feels like their personalities have flipped, Zanka getting a damn rise out of him, from the others perspective, he's sure it looks like he just took the bait, but it feels different than that, his hand presses harder, but Zanka doesn't flinch, only stares at him challengingly, like he always does. All of these things combined cause him to grate out the words that wouldn't come out before.
"Why don't you care." he stares down at him venomously, Zankas face twists into a horrible smirk, its feels harmful. And out of spite he forces his hand to lay as sweetly as possible on the wound, barely a whisper of a touch.
Zanka goes to open his mouth, likely going to spew something self-deprecating and stupid, Jabber's face darkens.
"You're a person."
When the words fly out of Jabber's mouth, it feels like a realization to both of them, more-so than Jabber realizing he loves him, in their own way, he needs him desperately. It's all so fitting how he easily he gets on his nerves in turn. But Zanka being human makes him tangible, consequences, since his mother died, there had been not a single one, there was no need to act with grace, he was to do as he liked. Now what?
This wipes any form of mirth off of Zanka, to him that's satisfactory, how dare he anyways.
"Well, whatever, if you're actually so upset let me hit you back." they both understand how that sounds, and for that reason, Jabber swallows it down and shakes his head, his wicks brush against the both of them, even through all of this, they've moved closer.
Zankas face is static, but he can look closer this time, he looks.. settled, his eyes are clear. He lays Lovely down on the bed, taking up an obnoxious amount of space, but she deserves it after all shes been through.
Jabber laughs at him for it anyways, its infectiousness causes Zanka to slowly join him too, its genuine this time. Jabber crashes down onto the bed beside him, two tall, nearly grown teens and a 10 ft tall staff in one cot, it only makes him laugh harder, until they're both gasping for air. He can feel Zanka's heart-beat.
It dies down as quickly as it started, but the atmosphere is easy, and Jabber buries his smile into his side causing Zanka to huff.
"This better not be the end of it, i still have to kill ya," Zanka says, but its with no animosity, Jabber just giggles again.
"I think we will both die together," Jabber says, and Zanka hums and closes his eyes, Jabber allows himself to copy that motion.