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Sometimes you turn and gaze over your shoulder
as if you're waiting for a strong rebuke;
subconsciously you start, "Fullmetal..." – only
there's no one there. And you can only look
at emptiness. You didn't think you'd miss him:
he was a child. He's still a child, you fool.
He is the poor soul that lost its innocence
when his naive young mind met Truth in full.
You saw that thing yourself, can't help but shudder
every damn time your memories play games:
you're mournful 'cause your worldview had been shuttered,
you're thankful for the 'real talk' all the same.
You're an ex-officer that wants to rule a country
that has been lost to greed for far too long:
you're a cold-blooded git, but a romantic
in everything that has survived your wars.
You think he'd be an excellent companion:
to make you move when you don't want to act,
to tell you with derision, "You're not funny...",
to whisper that the thing you did was right.
But he's not here. And you're not where you should be.
Why aren't you following your chosen plans?
You seem depressed, though didn't shoot himself,
lost in the memories about the past events:
about dictators of a supernatural nature,
about uprisings, loses and conquests,
about the underbelly of Améstris,
about the guilt that's squatting in your chest...
You had your chance to kill yourself – and didn't,
so now you have no right to try that ploy:
your death won't resurrect the dead: forgiveness
is something that you're freely given, Roy...
He would have told likewise – but more profane:
that your avoidance and procrastination
won't do you any good, won't break your shame,
much less they'll help you to improve your nation.
Your country moves already in the right direction
with reinstating Ishval as a sovereign state:
your government's past sins are payed for by the actions
of those who now rebuild the devastated.
So, what's the purpose of your living at the world's edge?
What are you waiting for? It's not a midlife crisis:
you are too young, you're still a little reckless,
despite the things you lived through – and survived.
If it's hiatus, you're allowed breathing space:
civilians or soldiers – you're just humans.
But life's not gonna change for you her rapid pace,
you won't be saved by your experience or humor.
Or... are you hesitating, 'cause your tired heart
is skipping beats when you think of the golden hue?
Do you believe you'd better be and keep apart
from that unstoppable and very stubborn youth?
You're doubting your past and days beyond,
you are uncertain of your here and now.
But almost nothing can destroy that solid bond,
with which you and who served with you are bound.
So, there's no need to choose between your job and heart,
you can have both and make the best of what you have.
You will not know if it is easy or too hard,
if you're not gonna try. Don't pile regrets.
Don't waste your life on 'what-if's, be its master.
Life is too short to fret about the things you can't foresee...
There's knocking on your door and loud, "Führer Bastard!"...
Your future's not as bleak as you would like to think.
4-8/02/2026