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Silver was a secret keeper.
This was something that people either had no idea about or knew very well. He could keep anything secret out of necessity or choice, no matter how important it was.
He had many secrets.
Both his own, and those of his own making.
When Silver was seven, he had run away after learning that his father wasn’t his father. Silver had run out into a storm, intending to disappear. He had hidden in a hollowed-out tree.
The first to find him then hadn’t been Lilia. No, it had been a spirit with beautiful white wings and a golden halo that matched his long blonde hair. The spirit wore white, shiny armor, befitting of a knight. The spirit had stared at him with worry filled aurora eyes, the same colored eyes as Silver’s. Silver had never understood why the spirit was so concerned about him or why their eyes were the same color. But the spirit had stayed with him, hugged him and combed his fingers through Silver’s wet hair, until Lilia eventually found him.
The spirit had disappeared before Lilia could see him.
Silver kept the spirit’s existence a secret.
Lilia had taken him home, taken care of him even after he passed out from exhaustion and sickness. When Silver awoke, Lilia asked why he had run away. Silver had gave in and told Lilia the truth.
It was the only secret that Silver had ever let spill from his lips.
Another time, when Silver was only about eight, Lilia had once come home drunk after a night out with Baur, barely even awake. Lilia had been so drunk that he probably hopefully didn’t even recognize Silver as his son.
Lilia had shouted at him, called him a filthy, iron blood and slapped Silver for calling him ‘papa’.
The next day Lilia didn’t even seem to remember what had happened. Silver didn’t tell him. If Lilia didn’t remember, then Silver didn’t want to burden him with the knowledge of what had happened.
Silver also didn’t tell Malleus or Sebek about what happened that night. Silver simply assumed that Sebek wouldn’t believe him. Why would he? Silver is human, less than any fae could be. And Lilia was a fae, a former war general who couldn’t remember what had happened. Sebek would no doubt assume Silver was lying, even if he had never done so in the past.
As for Malleus, Silver knew the dragon fae would believe him. Believe him without hesitation. That was what scared him. Silver knew that Malleus was protective of him, a blind man could see that clear as day. Silver assumed that Malleus would bypass the fact that Lilia was drunk and try to take Silver away. He knew that Malleus would take care of him, not let him end up with some stranger far away. But Silver didn’t want to be separated from his father, especially not over something as stupid as a slap that hadn’t even left a lasting bruise.
So, Silver kept it a secret.
Silver started visiting BlackScale palace to see Malleus and train when he was ten. He dutifully kept it a secret when fae picked on him for being human. Being weaker. Picked on him for his ears being round unlike their pointed ones.
Silver hid how much those comments affected him. How much he started doubting himself from their comments about him being weak and useless. How much he started hating his own ears because they were what made him so obviously human.
But that didn’t matter.
They would get in trouble if he told anyone, and they didn’t deserve that when they merely spitting cruel facts.
And when Lilia asked why Silver was suddenly styling his hair in a way that hid his ears? Silver had simply said that he just wanted to try a knew hairstyle out and that it was nothing too serious. He lied, yes, but it was a secret. His secret.
And the secret was his to keep.
One secret, perhaps the one he purposely hid the most, was that he had known who his biological father was long before Malleus’ overblot. He had learned that when he was fifteen. One of the fae council members had spat that knowledge out at him with such cruelty it had made him flinch. Maleficia had been quick to defend him then, as she always was. She took pride in her self-appointed title of his godmother after all.
But even after she had defended him, making the fae council member scurry away in fear of her wrath, Silver hadn’t been able to look her in the eye when she asked him if he was okay.
How could he ever be okay after learning that? Perhaps that was why Lilia traveled so much when he was little. Because he couldn’t stand the sight of Silver. How could Malleus be okay with Silver training to be his knight? How could Maleficia want to willingly be his godmother in spite of what his bloodline had done? Why hadn’t he run away again that day? Why had he just stayed frozen in place until she put his hand on his shoulder oh so gently, as gentle as she’s always been with him. She had lifted his chin then, so he would look her in the eye. She did it so she could check for injuries.
But that was the last time he had ever looked her in the eye.
That was the last time he had looked a Draconia in the eye.
He could no longer bear to look Malleus in the eye after learning what he had. How could he? He was unworthy.
But Silver still kept this knowledge a secret.
Perhaps because he was scared, perhaps because he was selfish. Silver wanted to continue staying beside Lilia and Malleus’ sides, even with the knowledge of what his biological father had done.
It was a secret after all.
When he had gotten to go to Night Raven College alongside Lilia and Malleus, he was happy. After all, he could finally continue being with them.
Even with the knowledge of who’s blood ran through his veins, that didn’t take away from how much he enjoyed being around them.
But not only had Lilia asked Silver not to call him father while they were there, but he had also asked Silver to stay away from them. Lilia had said it was because he wanted Silver to make friends outside of them, but Silver could only see it as a way to get rid of him, even if only for a little while.
But Silver obeyed Lilia’s request, he always listened to Lilia. And he didn’t let how much it hurt him show.
It was just another secret to keep.
Even so, one person could only take so much.
So, he had taken the dagger, the same one Lilia had given him when he started training to become a knight and cut his wrist. It was only once, but it helped more than Silver had thought it would.
Silver had obviously hidden the cut from Lilia and Malleus. He couldn’t let them know. He couldn’t face their reactions. Perhaps Lilia would even be pleased that the spawn of someone who had taken so much from him was in pain. And Silver couldn’t bear the thought of confirming that fear, even if it could also prove that fear irrational and wrong.
And it wasn’t that big of a deal anyway, after all, guilt kept him from ever even thinking about doing it again.
So, Silver kept it a secret.
But, as Lilia had requested, Silver had made new friends. Friends that he did quite like. Friends that he hadn’t hurt before he was even born.
But, of course, that always led to him keeping secrets.
Silver once kept Riddle’s feelings for Trey a secret until Riddle had worked up the courage to tell him.
Silver knows all of Leona’s secret napping spots by heart. After all, the lion had once shown him when Silver accidentally mentioned that he needed to be away from others for a few hours. The only condition? That Silver kept them a secret.
Silver kept Azul’s fear of being alone a secret. He simply offered his company to the octopus-mer whenever Azul was alone and needed someone there. Silver never asked anything in return obviously. And most importantly, he kept it a secret.
Jade and Floyd had once confided in him about their fear of Azul fearing them due to their chaotic and cruel nature. Silver had comforted them, told them that Azul could never part from them, all without letting Azul’s secret spill. And Silver had kept that encounter a secret as well.
Jamil had once confided in him about how he truly felt about Kalim. About how he hated the heir with all he was, how he wanted Kalim gone but could never bring himself to hurt the heir. It felt wrong, but Silver had kept that a secret too. He didn’t want to betray his friend’s trust, that was wrong, and he didn’t want to hurt Kalim by telling him how Jamil – his best friend – truly felt about him.
It was during winter break that year that Lilia allowed him to stop avoiding them at Night Raven College, though he still wasn’t allowed to call Lilia father.
Silver had asked Lilia why. Why he wasn’t allowed to call him father and why he had to avoid them in the first place.
Lilia had explained to him. The explanation for not wanting Silver to call him father was simple enough, it raised less questions. As for the avoidance…
Lilia had told Silver that he didn’t want Silver to be lonely due to only truly having him, Malleus and Sebek. Silver would have refuted that he could never be lonely as long as he had them, but he held his tongue. Especially since Lilia had seemed so happy when Silver told him about the friends that he had made.
So, Silver had kept his lingering hesitance and sadness a secret, along with all his other secrets, and the secrets that others had entrusted to him.
After all…
Silver was a secret keeper.