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Sand, Seashells, and Seagulls

Summary:

September 3, 1979

Remus makes the mistake of complaining to his boss about his boyfriend's adamant refusal to use cooling charms all summer. Sirius finds out and a day at the beach is obviously in order.

“Where are my swim trunks?” James’s voice was muffled as he rummaged through his bag.

“I have no idea!”

“Fine, don’t tell me. I don’t need them anyways.”

“You wouldn’t—oh you would! Moony! Give Prongs back his swim trunks! Now!”

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

September 3, 1979

9:13 a.m.

“I never should have complained.” Remus J. Lupin deadpanned through a mane of thick black fur that kept smacking him in the face with the steady stream of fresh air through the open car window.

Remus had several regrets in life. He was currently regretting his decision to complain to his boss, Winnie, about his boyfriend’s adamant refusal of using cooling charms in their flat. He’d gone all summer without so much as a growl about it, but earlier this week had been the last straw. Sirius and James had somehow gotten it into their heads that attempting to replicate Mrs. Potter’s famous curry recipe was the best thing to do on their day off, and working with a hot stove and spices and generally shite cooks was most certainly not the best thing to do on a hot day.

Remus’s right eye twitched at the memory.

Their poor kitchen.

Although Sirius had to walk around shirtless for the next few days, so it wasn’t all that bad.

Long story short, Remus’s brief complaining led Winnie to casually mentioning it to her muggle sister, Sarah. Now, this wouldn’t have been so bad, if she didn’t do it loudly and very obviously when Sirius was well within earshot. No amount of “Summer is basically over, we don’t have to do anything about it now!” would dissuade Sirius from his rapidly forming plan to cool Remus down.

One thing led to another, which ultimately led him to be stuck in the back seat of Lily’s borrowed van with Snuffles currently sitting in Remus’s lap with his monstrous fluffy head stick out the open window on their way to the beach.

“No, you really shouldn’t have.” Lily narrowed her brilliant green eyes at him in the rear view mirror. She had one hand on the steering wheel and the other on James’s arm in an attempt to prevent him from sticking his head out of the window like Sirius. “James! If you don’t put your head back in right this second, so help me MERLIN I’ll—”

“No worries, Lily-love, no worries here.” James sat back down properly right away.

Peter gleefully watched the changing scenery beside him. Remus thought about shoving Sirius over onto their fair-haired friend who was currently only sweating because of the sunlight, and not of an unholy combination of sunlight, a blocked window, and a huge furnace of a shaggy dog.

With a smirk and an inconspicuous flick of his wand, he was free.

“Moony! Get your boyfriend off me!”

Remus did no such thing.

10:01 a.m.

It took much longer than anticipated to set up their spot on the beach. This was mostly due to Sirius’s insistence on doing it the ‘muggle way’.

Remus distracted Sirius with seashells as James and Lily charmed and transfigured their umbrellas and towels appropriately.

Peter had initially tried to help in the distraction process by turning into a rat for one reason or another—the beach was empty aside from them, so no one thought anything of it. However, they all quickly realized that the action did nothing more than draw hordes of seagulls towards them.

Peter quickly vowed to never turn into a rat at a beach again.

“You two set that up fast!” Sirius looked at the impressive setup. “Future Mrs. Prongs, I do believe we missed a lot of your mischief making potential from our Hogwarts days. I almost didn’t notice all that charm work.”

“What about me?” James puffed out his bare brown chest. His hair was already even messier than usual with damp salty air around.

“Subtly has never been your strong suit, mate,” Sirius said without mercy. “I could’ve smelt your transfiguration from half way down the beach.”

James crossed his arms over his bare chest and was about to make an official complaint, but Lily had chosen that time to start smearing sun cream all over her pale arms and stomach, and all thoughts of Sirius flew right out of his head.

“Lily-love! I can help with your back. I know how much you hate getting sunburnt.”

Sirius took out his own sun cream.

“Moony! Help a bloke out, would you?” the Animagus grinned.

“I doubt the sun is going to emerge from the clouds long enough for it to do any damage.” Remus rolled his eyes and took the bottle.

“Watch your mouth! My fair, delicate, inbred skin is extremely light sensitive. You remember the Sunburn of 1973?”

Remus’s right eye twitched again and he put a second layer of sun cream on Sirius’s back.

Peter had taken the liberty of applying his own sun cream with the assistance of magic when everyone was distracted.

10:16 a.m.

“Where are my swim trunks?” James’s voice was muffled as he rummaged through his bag.

“I have no idea!”

James and Sirius stared at each other for a moment.

“Fine, don’t tell me. I don’t need them anyways.”

“You wouldn’t—oh you would! Moony! Give Prongs back his swim trunks! Now!”

The werewolf was quick to act.

10:34 a.m.

“Lily and I are—er—going to go for—er—a walk.”

“That was incredibly convincing,” Remus replied sarcastically.

“If you’re thinking what I think you’re thinking let me tell everyone that there should be no attempted shagging on the beach. The sand gets bloody everywhere, and it’s not pleasant for anyone.”

Everyone slowly turned to Peter, who stilled suddenly as though realizing what exactly he just said.

“Wormtail… do you know this from experience?” James asked with a sly smirk. Lily smacked his shoulder.

Peter make an indiscriminate noise and scampered off yelling something about collecting seashells for the wedding centre pieces.

“We must make him confess,” Sirius stated, leaning his chin on Remus’s still T-shirt clad shoulder.

“It’s his own business, Pads.”

“It’s eating you up inside! We must find out!” Sirius whispered loudly, just in case Peter were to overhear.

Remus was not about to admit that it was irking not knowing, but wasn’t about to give in that easily. Everyone was entitled to their privacy. Including James and Lily, who still scampered off like to love-birds.

“What we must do here is make Wormtail think he’s safe. He’s expecting us to do something when he returns, so obviously we do nothing, and he’ll confess later to avoid whatever he thinks we have planned.”

“You’re a bloody genius.” Sirius kissed Remus for his brilliant ideas.

11:19 p.m.

Remus watched as Snuffles jumped into another wave, chasing a stick James threw.

“Your boyfriend is seriously barking mad sometimes,” Lily mused, flopping down on the towel beside him.

“You—no, we are so lucky he’s not here to hear that,” Remus grinned, setting his book aside.

“Sorry about stealing Sirius a lot over the past few months.” Lily adjusted her big floppy sunhat. “I don’t think I would have been able to go through all this wedding shite without him though. You know he cried when he saw me in a wedding dress?”

Remus snorted.

“No, but I’m not surprised. And it’s really no problem, Lily. This is Sirius’s way of officially accepting you into the Marauder clan. He’s quite the meddler sometimes.”

“I can’t wait until you two get married, now THAT is going to be an event,” Lily teased, taking the book from his loose grip.

Remus blushed, and opened his mouth to say something, but Lily just laughed, rolling away from him. He had about two seconds for his sharp mind to realize what was happening, but by then it was already too late, and a huge black, soaking wet shaggy dog lay down on top of him.

“Sirius, bloody—ow! What are you—?” Remus gasped for breath, laughing. Snuffles’s head disappeared and Sirius took over his field of vision. “People could have seen you!”

“I wanted you to come play in the water with me! Plus, there’s no muggles anywhere. I’m pretty sure Evans did some sort of anti-muggle charm when I wasn’t looking. She’s admittedly clever sometimes.” When Remus made no move to join him, Sirius pouted. “I missed you.”

Sirius’s long hair was coming out of its bun, cascading around Remus’s face like a curtain.

“I missed you too,” the werewolf murmured, bumping his nose against his boyfriend’s.

The two said nothing for a few moments, just staring at each other while salt water dripped from Sirius’s nose.

The oddly intimate moment was broken soon afterwards.

“Wanna charm the seagulls to go after Evans and Prongs?” Sirius asked with a shit-eating grin.

Remus laughed.

“Obviously. I don’t even know why you even bother asking anymore.”

Notes:

... I'm back~

Sort of. I meant to get this out in July, but then July was like "lol too late I'm over!" and then August was like "whoops, I'm over too, sorrynotsorry". On the plus side, I'm about 35,000 words into my book now and I'm actually kinda happy with it? I also have like half a year left in Japan before I move back to the Canada~ which is really weird to think about...

Thank you for reading, and for sticking with me in spite of my long hiatus. Hopefully the next one will come out sooner. I love it when I get those emails saying a guest or a user has gone through the entire series and left a kudos on every episode... Keep that up!

This episode is for Bunny b/c she's had an extremely stressful summer, but she's only got one stressful week left! Woohoo~

As always, have a wonderful day, and remember! Sand is for making sandcastles in, not for the sexy times (completely basing this off of what I've heard, I have no personal experience with it).

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