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Kaveh was no stranger to piles upon piles of gifts on her desk on Valentine's Day. She would never admit it herself, but she was probably the most well-liked person in her grade. She was smart and kind to everyone, not to mention beautiful. It was only natural for people to crush on her— and being corny high schoolers, most of those people confessed on Valentine's each year. The kids on the shyer side wrote sweet letters confessing that they thought Kaveh was an angel. The bolder ones handed her chocolates directly.
Of course, Kaveh rejected them all. Politely, as to not hurt anyone's feelings; That was the last thing she wanted. She rejected the boys almost immediately, the thought of dating one— holding hands, kissing… It grossed her out in a way she didn't understand. As for the girls, they were always so very sweet and shy, she'd feel terrible breaking their hearts. So, out of guilt, she'd "date" them for a few days until they realized they didn't really know her. None of her admirers did. All they knew was the "angel" Kaveh, who held doors open for girls and helped people struggling with their math homework.
That's why it greatly surprised her when, on Valentine's in her junior year, she opened her locker to see an envelope flutter down to the floor. Classes were already over, with all of Kaveh's candy and cards placed carefully into her backpack. Ever curious, Kaveh picked up the envelope, turning it over to see a real-life wax seal on the front, in a deep crimson with a little heart imprinted into the design.
Kaveh raised a brow. Absolutely no one had ever given her a card like this— in her locker, no less. She looked around, hoping to see the culprit nearby, watching or shyly turning the corner. When she saw nothing out of the ordinary, she hummed and opened the envelope.
Inside, there was a letter written on very nice, patterned paper. With the level of dedication this admirer had, she expected neat, near-unreadable cursive. But instead, and she found this rather adorable, the handwriting was shaky and scratchy, as if they'd tried to write with their opposite hand. How odd, yet strangely endearing.
Kaveh slowly read the letter, her face growing redder with each heartfelt word that entered her mind.
To my dearest Kaveh,
As they say, "love is in the air." I'm sure you've received many kind gestures today, as you always do. I do not have the means to offer you expensive chocolates nor the confidence to express myself in person, so I've decided to tell you how I feel in the best way I know how: The written word. Though, there is not a singular finite amount of words in any known language to fully express the extent of my devotion to you. Still, I will try. For you.
You may not regard me as anyone of particular importance in your life. Archons know you have many colleagues dying to get a chance to sit with you during the lunch period. You may only think of me in passing, but believe you me, you are always in my thoughts. Even in my dreams, your radiance is a constant presence in my consciousness. Your brilliant mind, comparable to none, except perhaps the great Michelangelo, fascinates me with every word that spills from your lips. You are a marvel, not in just the matter of integrity and knowledge, but in your presence and physical beauty as well. Though, I am not the type to hold a high importance in such a thing. Even if you weren't crafted by the loving hands of Aphrodite herself, you would still steal the breath from my lungs each time you smile. And perhaps, in such a case, death by suffocation would not be so terrible.
Regardless, I have much more I wish to tell you, however I'm running out of room on this paper and it is dangerously close to my bedtime as I write this.
By the time Kaveh had reached the end of the paper, she was stunned into silence. Never in her life had anyone said anything like this to her before. Normally, people would just call her cute or pretty. This was the type of thing you only read about in books! Either this was a prank, or Kaveh had someone madly in love with her.
And of course, Kaveh's first thought was to tell Alhaitham all about it, and she knew exactly where to find him. It was the same spot he was always in. The back corner where no one ever visited because one of the lights was broken. it didn't help that the entire section was dedicated to books about astrophysics. Alhaitham was in his usual spot, a big book in his hands with his little frog reading light perched on the hardcover. It was really cute, especially with his glasses that took up half of his face.
He didn't look up— he didn't need to. He'd heard Kaveh loudly sprinting down the hall even through his headphones. It was truly peculiar how Kaveh had all the stamina in the world for swim club, but absolutely none for a short sprint halfway across the school. Kaveh made her presence known by bracing herself against the edge of the old table, trembling as she held up the letter.
"And what is this?" He asked dryly, finally glancing up and adjusting his glasses, watching Kaveh pant like a dog.
"This—" Kaveh began, taking deep breaths, her smile widening, "Just… Just look!"
She rounded the table and plopped down next to Alhaitham, leaning in to his personal space as she presented the letter to him. She gave him a moment to read it over, practically vibrating with excitement. He gave her an unimpressed look, but allowed her to speak.
"Isn't it so romantic?" She sighed dreamily, holding the fragile paper to her chest and resting her head on his shoulder, giggling giddily as she began to fantasize aloud about what this secret admirer might look like.
"They're obviously very smart and well-read," she pointed out, getting a rare hum of agreement from Alhaitham in response, "smart people wear glasses. Maybe.. they're tall, too? Like the strong, silent type…"
Alhaitham surprisingly stayed silent. Normally, he would point out that her daydreams were highly unrealistic and she should lower her standards. He just let her ramble on about how they must be very sweet and romantic, but shy too, considering they wrote about not being able to confess in person.
At that thought, Kaveh frowned. She lifted her head, looking up at Alhaitham's lowered gaze. "I hope they don't think I'm mean or anything," she murmured, "Oh, Archons, what if they think I'm like those girls from the movies? Do I give off that impression?"
Before Kaveh could spiral further, Alhaitham closed his book with a soft poomf, adjusting his glasses again. He finally looked directly at her— well, as direct as he could, and spoke slowly. "I doubt they do, Kaveh. If they had such a terrible impression of you, they wouldn't feel so strongly, would they?"
Kaveh pursed her lips, leaning forward and resting her head on the table. "I don't know…" She whispered, "Why else would they be so shy..? I mean, I've gotten written letters before, but… Nothing like this. They didn't even sign their name."
Alhaitham hummed, fidgeting with the sleeve of his sweatshirt, gazing off at some random bookshelf, "Maybe they're worried about how you'd feel if you found out who they were."
Kaveh furrowed her brows and lifted her head a little, "Hm…? But… why confess if you didn't want me to know who you are…?"
Alhaitham was now focused on a completely different side of the room, "Who's to say?"
Then, quieter, "Do you want to know who it is?"
"Of course I do!" Kaveh exclaimed as she shot up, a bit too loud for the library. Even though there was no one around, she shied back into her seat, embarrassed, "I mean… I just… Have no idea how I would. What should I do?"
Alhaitham thought in silence for a few seconds, "You know I'm not one for romance—"
"Obviously."
"— But perhaps you could go around asking possible suspects if it was them."
Kaveh let out a snort. "That's so embarrassing! I couldn't do that," she smiled, "and don't say suspects like they're criminals!"
She lightly punched Alhaitham's arm, a tiny smile tugging at his lips. "Fine, then what do you think would be best?"
Kaveh hummed in thought, before perking up with a cheeky smile. "I'll write them back! Tape it to my locker so they see it!"
Alhaitham rolled his eyes, though that tiny smile only widened, "What if someone steals it before they can see it?"
Kaveh shrugged. "Then I'll just keep writing until they do."
When Kaveh arrived to her apartment that night, she quickly tugged off her shoes and nearly tripped, laughing at herself. She always seemed so much clumsier after swim meets. She made a bee-line to her mother, giving her a kiss on the temple as she prepared dinner, glancing back at her daughter with a fond huff. Teenagers.
Kaveh flew into her desk chair so fast she almost fell over, searching for the cutest notebook paper she could find. She settled on tearing a page from one with pale pink pages and a chubby grey cat in the corner, writing out everything she wanted to say in record time. She then folded the paper in half, writing in big red marker, "SECRET ADMIRER ONLY!!!" with hearts around it. The letter read:
Hi! I'm taping this up on my locker so you can see it, because I don't know if you noticed, but you didn't sign your name on your letter :( :(
I want to tell you I really liked it, and it was really really sweet. If you're shy, we can keep talking like this- its kind of fun! until you feel comfortable telling me who you are. But just know I won't judge you for anything! ♡ Its really admirable to even confess to someone at all, you know!!
But, if you do wanna tell me, we can meet after school soon. Maybe by the big peach tree near the soccer field? It's really romantic this time of year!
She shoved it into her backpack and finally took a shower— chlorine water and curly hair was a miserable combination to be left alone for too long.
The next day, before classes began, she taped the paper to her locker, patting it for good luck. Unluckily though, she had several tests in the same day, and ended up completely forgetting about the letter until she finally got a small break period, where she saw that the note was now gone. Excited and rejuvenated, she powered through the rest of the day, and sure enough, as that final bell rang… There it was. A new note.
Kaveh grabbed it so fast she nearly ripped it. There was no envelope this time, it was only folded in half like her own. She opened it, and couldn't stop the grin on her face as she recognized that terrible handwriting.
This time, the letter was shorter.
Kaveh,
Thank you for reaching out to me. Yes, the lack of signature was intentional. I apologize if that makes this difficult for you… I worry for what will become of me if you were to find out who I truly am. I would prefer to communicate like this, until the time is right.
In truth, I do not find myself to be "admirable" whatsoever. I do not mean to self-deprecate, but I would sooner call myself a coward for my inability to face you. I know you would not place judgment upon me, for I know that is not the type of person you are, Kaveh. You may disagree with my next statement, but I wholeheartedly believe it to be true.
You are the most pure of souls, truly a beacon of heavenly light upon someone such as myself, so deeply submerged in darkness that I would surely be unable to claw my way back to the surface.
And yet… I'd been blessed with the chance of meeting an angel.
I do not believe in concepts such as fate or luck, nor do I believe in "pure goodness" or "pure evil," but your existence alone is evidence enough to prove me wrong. You put so much of yourself into the world around you that it strikes me with the truest feeling of unease, but also a strange fascination. You show kindness to those who certainly do not deserve such a thing— myself included. Alas, even for an angel, I see the glow of your halo dim, even when you polish it to near perfection. No one is perfect, Kaveh. But that's why I love you.
This letter made Kaveh's heart flutter, but left her even more confused than before. She felt a strange bitter tightening in her chest. An angel. Right… That's what she was to everyone, wasn't she? A sweet girl who could do no wrong.
…And yet, reading the letter again, Kaveh realized that this person, whoever they were, had managed to notice the cracks in her shining armor. She'd never confided in a single person about the bone-deep insecurity she felt, that despite all the good she tried to do, she felt like it was never enough. She was a cruel, selfish person that could never make up for her past mistakes.
Furrowing her brows, she flipped the page, looking at the back of the paper. In tiny, familiar handwriting that she could recognize anywhere after two years of sharing notes, she read:
P.S., peaches sound lovely. I do hope that brilliant brain of yours hasn't failed me again.
Kaveh booked it to the soccer field. Her mind was racing, processing a million revelations at light speed. She stuttered out apologies to each person she bumped into on her single-minded mission, until she reached the giant peach tree that was older than the school building itself.
Before she could get a word out, she heard his voice from behind the tree. "You run incredibly loud, did you know that?"
Kaveh nearly burst into tears as Alhaitham turned the corner, avoiding Kaveh's gaze. He wasn't wearing his usual black sweatshirt, he was wearing a white button-up shirt with his long hair tied back in a cute little half-bun, his full face finally visible— and oh, Archons, was he blushing. He even had a bow-tie on, obviously done by himself for the first time. In his hands, he was holding a bouquet of red roses.
"Alhaitham—" Kaveh began, smiling wide, "Archons, fuck, you're so cute!"
She surged forward, hugging him tightly with a giggle. "You should have just told me it was you!"
"…But then it wouldn't be fun," Alhaitham murmured, burying his burning face in Kaveh's soft curls.
Kaveh laughed harder, then pressed three kisses to his chubby cheek, finally taking a good look at his face. "You're wearing contacts," She noted, "I like your glasses better… They make your eyes look bigger."
Alhaitham shifted, ducking his head, "Grandma said I should look handsome for you."
"Alhaitham!" Kaveh scolded gently, pinching his cheek, "you don't need to dress up for me. I like you exactly as you are."
"You… like me?"
Kaveh's cheeky grin came back, "I wouldn't have run all the way here if I didn't, now would I?"