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It wasn't unusual for Mizukis girlfriend to disappear for hours on end- that was the problem. Kanade had a habit, an uncontrollable urge to lock herself away, composing until the silly hours every night just to feel worthy of the love of her partners. Everyone had their own issues, but for some reason far from Mizuki, the smaller girl had decided hers weren't important; that talking would burden the others, and no amount of reassurance would calm her. All Mizuki could do was be there. And she would be damned if she wouldn't do that.
Sometimes, being there involved just listening. Sometimes it involved cuddles, reassurance and love. But this didn't seem like that sort of day to Mizuki. She hadn't seen her angelic girlfriend for more than a day, which was never a good sign. On bad days, the pale haired beauty had a habit of running. Pushing the ones she loved away so they wouldn't see the cracks in her carefully built facade of "okay." She had been getting better at trusting recently, only a week ago did she cry into Mizukis chest, lamenting about the stress and pain of the position she caught herself in (and then promptly apologizes for getting tears on her carefully assembled outfit, but progress is progress, right?)
Today, being there simply involved ensuring her girlfriend doesn't die. She wouldn't eat on days like these, so that meant hot chocolate. And that was exactly what she was carrying as she knocked on the door to the dark, messy bedroom belonging to her self sacrificing beloved.
No answer.
She knocked again, unfazed. It wasn't like Kanade to respond when someone knocked, she would be too busy blasting whatever she was composing on her headphones. Really, knocking was only a formality, for no reason other than to know she did it. The pink haired girl pushed her way in, opening the door with her elbow so as to not spill hot chocolate anywhere, immediately being hit by the damp smell of a room that hadn't seen a mop in weeks. Mizuki would try to clean when she could, but it was hard with a girlfriend who wouldn't let her in half the time, and a full time job at a dressmaking shop for the other half. Plus, it was rare Kanade would even let her help, and not have a panic attack deciding she was a burden. But beyond the familiar piles of clothes and old papers on the floor, lied a sight scarily familiar in it's own right. Her girlfriend, usually so stressed, lying motionless against the keyboard she was so protective over, locks of pearly hair streaming like waterfalls around her head, reaching all the way down to the floor. Strands caressed her hands, one on the keyboard and one still holding a pen over a score. Her milky skin had faded to an even paler colour, almost matching in tone to her hair, and her soft breathing seemed shallower than normal, at a rhythmic pace uncharacteristic of someone who spent their life in a constant state of panic.
As Mizuki edged closer, she cursed herself for not coming in sooner. It was painfully common for her sweet, angelic girlfriend to pass out from exhaustion and overworking, driving herself beyond the edge. There was only one cure Mizuki knew of, and though it may not be medically recommended, it had always worked for her sweetheart. Without another thought, she scooped up the small cat-like girl from her position against the keyboard, hot chocolate abandoned at the door, holding her close to her chest, which Kanade reflexively nuzzled into, letting out a small rumble that resembled a purr. Mizuki was glad to see her girlfriend alive, coming out of her unconscious state, even if only slightly.
Mizuki yet again elbowed a door open, this time to her own room, this time holding much precious cargo. While it would've been easier to leave Kanade on her own bed- Mizuki may be strong, but she couldn't carry a full blown person with ease- it was dark in there, and damp. She just couldn't bear the thought of leaving her girlfriend like that, especially during this sickly period. Instead, the sleeping beauty was layed out on the taller girls own bed, lying among plushies, cushions and sickly sweet bedsheets. She really did look beautiful like that, Mizuki mused, watching the light from her window illuminate the unconscious face of her girlfriend, which she was overjoyed to see the colour coming back to.
But as gorgeous as the opal haired girl was, Mizuki didn't have time to just stand there and admire her. She could wake up any minute, and if six years of experience had taught her anything, Kanade would be crawling back to her den the moment she could move. Mizuki wasn't about to stand for that- she sighed to herself, letting out a small giggle as she positioned herself curled up half on top of her smaller girlfriend- not with enough weight to crush her, but enough to keep her down until the larger girl deemed her fit to run off. And after today, that might be a while...
It was about an hour until Kanade woke up, and just as Mizuki had predicted, her girlfriend was trying to roll out of her grasp before even knowing where she was, breathing quickening as Mizuki saw her eyes dart around the room. The next time she felt a pull from under her, Mizuki whispered to the smaller girl.
"Where are you off to in such a hurry?" She let out a small smile, trying to soothe her girlfriends nerves with her vaguely stupid humour.
"Need to compose..." The pale girl screwed her eyes shut and bit one of her rosy lips, clearly struggle to get out a sentence. "Nearly... There..."
"Nearly where beautiful?" Mizuki didn't let up in her grip no matter how much her girlfriend struggled, holding her tight against her chest and stroking her long hair with one free hand.
"This one... The one..." Kanade let out a shaky breath, "this one will save him-"
"Oh no," Mizuki smiled, "you aren't composing any time soon; youre on bed rest!" With that, she gave a grin, and leaned fowards just enough to plant a kiss on her girlfriends beautiful face.
The sentence took a moment to register in the smaller girls mind, but the moment it did, she began to hyperventilate, a sound that sent shivers down Mizukis spine, coming with the dreadful realization she had made it worse. She sat up, squeezing her girlfriends hand, legs still lying over kanades stomach to ensure she couldn't escape. From this angle, she could stare right into her beautiful cloudy blue eyes. But she wasn't here to stare.
"Hey, whats wrong?" Mizukis eyes filled with concern, staring into Kanades without wavering for even a second.
"If I can't compose... Im not good enough." Kanade sighed, burying her face in a pile of plushies.
"And... If I'm not good enough. Youll all leave me..." That last bit came as a whisper, barely audible as the smaller girl shook.
"Were still here, arent we?" Mizuki smiled, but her girlfriend just shook her head violently letting out a whimper.
"But what if that changes-"
"What if I stop being good enough-"
"What if you find someone better-"
"What if-" Mizuki refused to take another second of self slander from the perfect girl beneath her. She knew Ena and Yuki weren't the type to leave, and she sure as hell wasn't. Kanade knew this too- the rosy haired girl knew these spirals too well, and she knew just how to stop them too, leaning fowards yet again kissing the girls soft lips, rendering her incapable of any more self deprecation, before lying back down on her girlfriends chest, chin resting on the top of her head, cushioned by soft, hair
"I'm sleepy..." Kanade yawned, turning her head over and burried her head in the neck of her larger girlfriend. Mizuki knew this was the closest to submission she'd get in these situations- so long as Kanade was safe, she was happy.
So she sighed a contented sigh, breathing in the smell of her girlfriends snowy hair
"Get some rest then."