Chapter Text
“Lacy, oh, Lacy, skin like puff pastry
Aren’t you the sweetest thing on this side of hell-”
“Stop. Cut the back track.” Chappell sighs.
Olivia slowly takes off the large headphones and looks towards the control room. Chappell is behind the glass rubbing her temples in frustration. Just before Olivia is about to ask what went wrong, her friend answers the question for her.
“Liv, you sound great. The problem is,” Chappell pauses, really thinking about what she’s about to say. “You don’t sound confident. You’re holding yourself back. Is there a reason for that?”
Olivia racks her brain for a reason for why she might be singing like this. Was it because she wrote this song so long ago, did it lose its significance? Is there something wrong with the lyrics? Was it because of who the song was written about? Olivia closes her eyes and tries her very best to come up with a reason for Chappell. Although, it is strangely difficult considering all that ghosts over Olivia’s mind are a pair of blue and green eyes that so closely resemble an ocean. When Olivia opens her eyes again, Chappell is staring at her with questioning eyes.
“I-I don’t know. I will try to figure out what it is, Chappell.” Olivia whispers.
“Liv, we’ve been working on this song for months. Heck, almost a year at this point. I have other people to work for and my own music too. I don’t know why it’s so hard for you to sing a song you wrote but I suggest you figure that out because it seems that you’re not sure why either. Is it something with the lyrics?” Chappell utters.
Olivia can’t bring herself to tell anyone why she’s been struggling so much with this song. Sometimes not even herself. So instead, she really thinks about what has been difficult. The lyrics. Or the lack of them considering only the first verse and part of the chorus are completed. Olivia can’t write lyrics because that means expressing how she feels. She is good at expressing herself and her feelings, but when it comes to this song, and this topic, she’s like a cat being thrown into water.
“It’s definitely the lyrics.” Olivia swallows.
“Okay. I’ll book a session with Gracie. Is that okay?” Chappell asks, as she lifts up her phone.
“Yeah, that’s good. Thank you.” Olivia murmurs as she exits the recording booth. “Am I done for today?” She remembers to ask.
“Yeah I think you’re good. I’ll see you tomorrow.” Chappell smiles as she sits up from her chair.
Olivia gathers her belongings and gives Chappell a hug before closing the door and walking down the hall to the front entrance. There, Olivia spots her best friend Tate leaning against a wall.
“There you are! How was it? Chappell hard on you?” Tate asks as she falls into step with Olivia.
“She’s always hard on people. But especially me considering the fact that I can’t record a single verse of my song without messing up. Chappell says I “don’t sound confident enough”.” Olivia mimics as she makes quotation marks in the air.
“Ugh, that’s harsh. But constructive criticism is mandatory. Were you recording ‘lacy’ again?” Tate asks, turning to Olivia as they walk towards the parking lot.
“Yeah, I just can’t get the song right. Me and Chappell agreed to feature her as the backing vocals but we can’t even do that with a song that’s one-fourth finished. She’s making me have a writing session with Gracie.” Olivia groans.
“You’ve been working on this song for a while right? How many of the lyrics do you have?” Tate questions as they approach Tate’s car.
“Only the first verse is done. I have some of the chorus though.” Olivia reassures Tate while they settle into the car.
“Liv, you seriously need to finish this song. You still have other songs you’re working on right?” Tate apprises.
Olivia groans. “Yeah, but enough about me. How was your day?” Olivia turns her head towards Tate who’s concentrated on steering out of the parking lot.
“Eh, the usual. Classes then dance practice. Not very eventful. Oh but there’s a party tonight and I was wondering if you were interested in going.” Tate turns to Olivia.
“I’m too exhausted. I need to finish some assignments anyway and work on finishing this song. Who’s holding the party though?” Olivia sighs as she leans back in the seat.
“I think Addison is.” Tate states.
Olivia freezes. If Addison is throwing a party then no doubt someone else will be there. Olivia would love to go now but it is not like she will even talk to anyone besides Tate. It is best she just stays home. Not spending her Thursday night with her classmates getting drunk.
“It’s alright, you go have fun. I know you love those things.” Olivia teases.
“Suit yourself, you old grandma.” Tate teases as she pinches Olivia’s cheek.
When Tate drops Olivia at home Olivia remembers to say “Send me pictures from the party and what you end up wearing. Please don’t get too drunk. I can’t be alone at school tomorrow.”
“Whatever you say.” Tate shrugs.
Olivia waves Tate off before opening her front door. When she enters, the house is dark meaning no one else is home. Olivia takes this as the perfect moment to rush up to her bedroom, kick off her Doc Martin boots, and place a CD on her CD player. A guitar riff fills the air as Olivia starts filing out her homework worksheet regarding Shakespeare’s influence on words and music today. The assignment is quite easy and Olivia finishes in under ten minutes before locating her secret journal full of song lyrics. She stands up and replaces the CD for a more soft album before returning to her desk and open journal. Oliva flips towards the page containing her unfinished song, ‘lacy’. Olivia reads over the first verse.
Lacy, oh, Lacy, skin like puff pastry
Aren't you the sweetest thing on this side of hell?
Dear angel Lacy, eyes white as daises
Did I ever tell you that I’m not doing well?
Olivia stares at the lines for a good minute before sprinting to grab the guitar standing in the corner of her room and returning it to her bed. Olivia runs her fingers across the fret board before closing her eyes and picturing ocean blue eyes and blonde hair that seems too soft to be real. What also comes to Olivia’s mind is sweet perfume. Perfume that causes Olivia’s mind to wander and alters the scent of her days.
Mondays always smell like sweet marshmallows and chocolate that remind Olivia of the smores she would make around a campfire at camp years ago. Tuesday smells of caramel and oranges. Something Olivia’s mom would likely be very fond of. Wednesday is Olivia’s favorite, smelling of cherries. Thursdays smell like coffee. Specifically, an espresso. Not the overly strong kind, but faint and delicate. Fridays have been recently changed and now smell of citrusy lemon and sweet frosting.
Olivia smiles softly at the thought just as lyrics fill up her head and she grabs the nearest pencil before scribbling something down and then rewriting it to perfection. She positions the guitar in her lap as she tries to find the note she wants. When she settles on the note C major Olivia takes a deep breath before the words leave her mouth.
“Ooh, I care, I care, I care
Like perfume that you wear
I linger all the time
Watchin’, hidden in plain sight”
Olivia’s mind is then brought back to earlier this school year. When the early stages of these feelings began. Olivia purposely stayed after class just to see her. Her annoyingly perfect hair and face. Oh how she hated it. How clean she was. How every time she left a room, her sweet scent lingered. Olivia was indifferent to her friends assuming they hated each other. Olivia then lifts her pencil again and writes another two lines. Her hands swiftly find their places on the guitar as Olivia quietly sings.
“Ooh, I try, I try, I try
But it takes over my life”
Olivia pauses before getting dragged right back into thought. How she sees her everywhere but can’t bring herself to talk to her. To listen to what she experienced, to hear what she thinks about Olivia. She has been stuck in this loop for what feels like forever. Apparently when you’re Olivia, two years feels like an eternity. Olivia cannot decide whether this is a good or bad thing. She gets another two lyrics out of this.
“I see you everywhere
The sweetest torture one could bear”
Olivia sighs with relief now that she has a chorus. She sets her guitar on its stand before flipping to another page in her journal. One towards the front, meaning it is a rather older entry. The lyrics on this page stick out to Olivia.
“And you’re probably with that blonde girl
Who always made me doubt”
Olivia scoffs considering what she has come to. She wrote those lyrics back during freshman year. Olivia remembers vividly hating the girl her ex got with after her. She never truly hated her, it was all jealousy and envy. Olivia shudders at the thought before closing the journal and tucking it under her bed. Just as Olivia is about to go change her phone lights up on her desk. Olivia walks up to her phone and is met by several notifications from Tate.
tateee :
6:52 pm
[attachment: two images]
you’re missing ouuuut :(
Olivia chuckles before clicking on the photos. The first photo is a selfie with a bunch of people. Tate is holding the phone and Olivia recognizes a few of the people surrounding Tate. Tate is wearing a gorgeous white dress and Olivia reminds herself to ask Tate where she got it when she sees her tomorrow. She sees Charli, Chappell, Billie, Ariana, Addison, Zara, and a certain face posing with a guy. Olivia’s heart drops when she sees an unrecognizable man with his arm wrapped around Sabrina’s waist. Olivia blinks, thinking the image will disappear if she blinks fast enough. When it doesn’t she slides to the next photo. This photo includes Tate posing with Ariana, Sabrina, and Billie. Olivia notices that Sabrina is wearing a glittering white dress that catches the light a little too perfectly. Before Olivia can think about something else she swipes out of the photos and responds to Tate.
:olivia
6:54pm
i like my bed thank you very much
i love your dress btw
okay have fun i don’t want to keep the others waiting for you
Olivia does not get to see what Tate replies to her with because as soon as Olivia sent the texts she threw her phone on her bed and groaned. She winces when she comes to terms with the fact that she is actually jealous. Olivia just sighs before deciding this was a problem for another day.
When Olivia wakes up the next morning she’s met with a pounding headache so painful she wonders if she was at the party last night. She reaches over to her night stand and unplugs her phone from the charger before checking her messages. The school group chat Olivia is a part of is blowing up and she clicks on it to see what everyone was debating about at such an early hour.
charli :
5:27 am
Is it true?
zaraaa :
5:28 am
oh last night? no clue
Olivia is confused about what everyone was talking about. She is about to type something when she hears a knock at her door.
“Livie, are you up?” Her mom’s voice asks softly.
“Yeah, I’m up.” Olivia calls back. She turns back to her phone abruptly.
Unknown number:
5:28 am
Of course it is. She’s such a slut.
Olivia looks at the messages with a questioning face before shrugging and tossing her phone back on the bed. After doing her makeup she walked over to her closet and picked out her favorite black hoodie with purple butterfly wings etched out in crystals on the back. After deciding on a skirt and slightly regretting it considering it was almost October, Olivia slipped into her boots and headed out the door.
Olivia meets Tate outside the campus she runs and gives her a hug.
“I’m so glad you decided to show up.” Olivia teases.
“Yeah well, I didn’t really drink last night. Wasn’t in the mood.” Tate shrugs.
“Tate not drinking a lot? That’s unusual.” Olivia says as she cocks her head to the side.
“I think yesterday's dance class really wore me out.” Tate shrugs. “Come on, let’s go inside.”
Just as Olivia and Tate settle into their seats in their first class, Chappell runs up to them and sits at the desk nearest to them.
“Is everything okay?” Olivia asks.
“Me? Yeah I’m good. It’s Sabrina that has something wrong.” Chappell states casually.
“What do you mean? We barely know her anyways.” Olivia questions.
“Ohhh, you mean what happened last night?” Tate asks Chappell.
When Chappell nods Olivia asks “I’m confused, what happened last night?”
“At Addison’s last night Sabrina was hanging around this guy. And now some people are saying she slept with him.” Chappell explains.
“Wait, who? Do they go to this school?” Olivia asks.
“No, this other guy. He’s not from around here. Apparently he has a girlfriend. Everyone is convinced she’s a homewrecker and broke them up.” Chappell explains.
Olivia’s mouth hangs agape. This is a repeat of freshman year. When everyone said Sabrina was the reason Olivia and her ex boyfriend split. It was revealed that Olivia’s ex never did anything with Sabrina while dating Olivia but some people never forgot it. The classwide chatter suddenly slows down and comes to a stop when someone walks through the door.
Olivia lifts her head and sees Sabrina standing in the doorway looking around for a desk to sit at. As Sabrina is looking around the class, her gaze meets Olivia’s. Olivia feels like the world suddenly stopped and they’re the only two people on the planet. Olivia, feeling overwhelmed when Sabrina doesn’t look away, swallows and drops her gaze back down to her desk to fiddle with her fingers. The next time Olivia looks up, Sabrina is sitting on the opposite end of the classroom and talking with some boys. Olivia can’t help but notice how neatly she crosses her legs or how effortlessly good her hair looks, falling over her shoulders. She doesn’t know how long she’s been staring, not until Tate’s voice brings her back into her body.
“It could just be a rumor, not like it’s the first time this has happened.” Tate states.
Olivia feels sick to her stomach whenever ‘the first time’ is mentioned. It brings a chill to her bones she did not know existed. Olivia does not have time to drown in her thoughts before the teacher enters the classroom and begins his lecture. The teacher’s lecture goes through Olivia’s ear and out the other. She can’t stop looking at Sabrina whose face looks all the more beautiful when she's focused on the teacher's words. Olivia doesn’t have to think hard about what perfume she’s wearing today. It’s Friday and Sabrina’s pale yellow outfit gives away the fact that she smells of sweet lemon pie.
After class, Olivia is organizing her locker alongside Billie considering the fact that they’re lockers happen to be right next to each other. As the two discuss school events, potential couples, and what music they are currently listening to, their conversation is cut short when someone approaches Billie and taps her shoulder. She turns around and Olivia follows Billie’s gaze to find Sabrina leaning against the locker, notebooks pressed against her chest.
“Hey baby.” Billie smiles as she goes back to taking books out of her locker.
Olivia winces. She doesn’t think she will ever get used to that. Olivia is still embarrassingly jealous of Billie for dating Sabrina earlier last year. Although they only dated briefly and remained friends, the pet name calling never seemed to stop and that never made sense to Olivia.
“I’m not gonna be at lunch today, Shawn is taking me off campus for lunch.” Sabrina says, curiously watching Billie at work.
Billie stops what she’s doing before turning to Sabrina. “Shawn? Are you guys still in touch? I didn't know that.”
“I mean, I don’t like him anymore. I think he might have a thing for me though, that’s why he asked me out. But who can say no to a free lunch date?” Sabrina jokes.
Olivia can’t help but observe Sabrina, taking the fact that Olivia doesn’t think they have ever been this close in recent times. The pale color of her matching outfit somehow makes her ocean colored eyes stand out even more. Olivia looks away before Sabrina catches her staring. She absent mindedly organizes her pens in rainbow order trying her best to ignore the person standing two feet away from her. Olivia feels a wave of coldness wash through her body as a sweet voice says,
“Olivia, I love your jacket. Where’d you get it?” Olivia brings her gaze up and is met with Sabrina’s soft smile. She can’t figure out if it is genuine or just her playing nice.
“Oh, thank you. It’s thrifted. I put the gems on myself.” Olivia says flatly, trying to appear unbothered. When she thinks Sabrina is done speaking to her she focuses her eyes back onto her own locker.
“That’s so cool. You’ll have to teach me sometime.” Sabrina remarks.
Olivia looks up past Billie and at Sabrina who’s still smiling softly. Olivia shrugs before managing to add “Maybe sometime.”
“Okay I have to go. I have english next and Ms. Swift hates when we’re late.” Sabrina whines.
“You have fun with that.” Billie laughs.
“Not funny. Okay bye, love you.” Sabrina quips as she kisses Billie’s cheek before running off.
Olivia tries to mask the weird feeling in her stomach by saying “Sure you’re not dating?”
Billie scoffs before replying with “Pfft. You wish.”
Olivia doesn’t know if Billie meant herself or Olivia. Either way, Olivia simply shrugs as Billie shoots her a smile before walking away.
During English, Olivia can’t help but be aware of the presence sitting right next to her at their shared table. Ariana, who is one of Sabrina’s best friends, is sat to Olivia’s left. Olivia spends most of the hour thinking about if Ariana knows how lucky she is to be Sabrina’s friend. Not having everyone assume you hate her.
Near the end of class when there is about five minutes left, Ariana turns to Olivia before asking “Hey Olivia, I’m having a party at my place tonight and was wondering if you wanted to come."
Olivia blinks, she’s never been invited to a party at Ariana's house direct;y by Ariana herself. Everyone knew that was a rare occurrence. Olivia was in need of some social time and thought it would be more enjoyable than spending her evening at home all by herself.
“Yeah I’d love to come. Thanks for inviting me.” Olivia smiles.
“No problem. By the way, I love your jacket.” Ariana states.
Olivia makes a mental note to wear this sweater more often.
Olivia was sitting at her vanity while Tate styled her hair with a straightener. She kept looking at her closet, trying to put together an outfit in her mind.
“What are you wearing tonight?” Olivia asks Tate.
“I’m gonna wear that black dress we bought at the mall that one time.” Tate says as she repositions Olivia’s head to face forward. “What about you?”
“Good question, I’ve been trying to find the answer to that for the past two hours.” Olivia groans.
Tate chuckles. “Oh I know, wear that purple dress with the black lace. You know the one with the sleeves?”
Olivia thinks about it. She has not been to a party in a very long time but she assumes that would be appropriate party attire. “That’s a great idea, I’ll wear that. Thanks.”
As Olivia and Tate stand in the entry of Ariana’s huge house, they are greeted with hugs and compliments on their dresses.
“Thank you so much for coming! I love your dresses by the way.” Ariana grins, swirling a cup in her hand. The house is covered in a hues of purple and pink. A loud, rap song can be heard from the other end of the hall.
“Come on, everyone is in the back.” Ariana beams as she gestures for the two to follow her down a corridor.
When Olivia and Tate are led into the back of the house they both let out surprised gasps. The large, open room leads outside where Olivia can see a wide pool and hot tub. It takes Olivia a second before she registers the large number of people in the house. The kitchen is crowded, the outdoor area seems full, and people can be heard upstairs.
“I’m gonna go say hi to Addison, you good?” Tate asks as she places a hand on Olivia’s shoulder.
“Yeah I’m good, go have fun.” Olivia assures her.
Tate walks off and Olivia is left standing alone. She looks around the room, in search of a familiar face. No one looks recognizable. Olivia sighs and leans against the wall. After a couple minutes of simply observing everyone else, Olivia feels a nudge at her elbow. Olivia turns herself to face the person.
“What are you doing standing here all alone? Stop sulking and go dance. Grab a drink at least.” Chappell jokes as she raises her plastic cup up towards Olivia.
Olivia almost gags at the scent. “Oh my god, what is that?” She manages to ask between coughs.
“Vodka. Why? You want some?” Chappell grins.
“No thank you.” Olivia mutters, pushing Chappell away.
“Figures. Is everything okay though? Are you not alone?” Chappell asks seriously this time.
"Just no one to talk to, that’s all. I don’t usually come to these things.” Olivia slumps against the wall.
“Liar, I bet everyone here wants to talk to you. Especially Sabrina over there.” Chappell quips as she takes a sip of her drink.
Olivia tense before turning fully towards Chappell. This had to be some sort of joke? Sabrina, looking at her?
“W-what do you mean? She’s probably looking at some guy-” Olivia’s sentence is cut short when she meets a familiar gaze across the room. She’s sitting on the couch, a man’s arm is wrapped around her shoulders. What’s strange is that Sabrina’s not looking at him. She’s staring right at Olivia, a look in her eyes Olivia can only label as hunger and curiosity. Time seems to stop, for the second time today. The loud music seems to slow, people stop moving, and the lights appear to dim. After what feels like hours, Sabrina tears her gaze away by looking at the man around her and laughing at what he had just said.
“Told you.” Chappell grins.
“You’re being ridiculous.” Olivia sputters. “She’s just looking at something over there.” She gestures with her hands.
“You know, I think she might be into you.” Chappell shrugs, ignoring what Olivia had just said.
Olivia feels a blush creeping up her neck at the thought. It is not possible though. Sabrina is the straightest person she’s ever seen.
“She’s not gay though.” Olivia tilts her head.
“Could be closeted. It’s obvious, she doesn’t actually hate you. I’m sure you don't either.” Chappell points out.
Olivia takes a deep breath before considering whether she should tell Chappell about her feelings. She can trust Chappell. Plus, she has way more experience than Olivia when it comes to things like this.
“I don’t hate her. I’ve never told anyone that, was afraid she’d find out and not feel the same way.” Olivia explains.
“Ah, I see. You like her.” Chappell laughs.
Olivia whips her head towards Chappell. “What–Why would you? –” The eyebrow raise Chappell gives her suggests that she isn’t all that convinced. “Okay fine, you win.” Olivia groans, dragging a hand down her face.
“Knew it. See, take one to know one.” Chappell smirks.
Olivia peaks at Chappell through her fingers before looking over towards the living room where a pair of eyes are already locked on her.
Sabrina can’t hear what the guy on her right is talking about. Heck, she doesn’t even know his name. All she can focus on is how distractedly attractive Olivia looks, leaning against the wall. She also can’t help but notice how Olivia’s dress catches her body in all the right places. The first time their gazes met tonight, Sabrina felt her world stop. She had to bring herself together and not get lost in those beautiful brown eyes.
Right now, they are looking right at each other, Olivia’s lips are parted and from where Sabrina is sitting she can see colors blooming on Olivia’s face. She can’t determine if it’s the lights or the result of the eye contact. Sabrina bites her lip without realizing before a hand taps at her thigh.
“What’s with the lip bite? Are you thinking of me?” The guy leans in and whispers.
Sabrina can’t deny the fact that she feels a strange rush of adrenaline. She would love to stimulate whatever she’s feeling but not with him. A guy she met a mere couple hours ago who she doesn’t know the name of. She can’t help it, the idea of touching someone was better than touching no one. No matter how badly Sabrina wanted it to be the brunette girl across the room. Then, Sabrina does what she does best, says the completely wrong thing.
“Yes actually, I’d love that.” She whispers back. “What was your name again?”
“I told you earlier, you're too drunk to remember?” The guy grins.
Sabrina doesn’t remember having much to drink besides a single shot of tequila. Maybe he was the drunk one. Sabrina’s confusion only turns into frustration when he doesn’t tell her his name.
“Let’s get out of here.” He says, standing up and bringing Sabrina with him. As they wave off the people they were sitting with, Sabrina hears a faint “Bye Chase.” Sabrina doesn’t feel surprised at the name. It suits him. Although not in a good way.
When Chase extends his arms for Sabrina to take, she slides her hand into his and interlocks their fingers. They move past the crowds of people and he leads her upstairs. Sabrina starts to feel dizzy, maybe she did have more than one shot to drink.
By the time they reach the top of the stairs, Sabrina is unable to feel her legs. She also cannot feel anything the moment she’s dragged into an empty room and pushed against the door. Sabrina feels his lips on hers before she has time to form a complete thought. Sabrina notes that this man is a bad kisser. He’s already forcing his tongue into her mouth which causes her to whine in discomfort.
He apparently takes that as a good sign by cupping her face and for a moment Sabrina thinks he’s about to deepen the kiss but instead she feels his hands wrap around her thighs and hoist her up. Sabrina lets out a gasp before he walks over to the bed. This is when Sabrina realizes they are in a bedroom. He places her down on her bed before pulling his shirt over his head and tossing it aside. Sabrina backs up against the bed frame as far away from him as possible. The pain in her head from earlier returns and she groans as she rubs her temples. When she looks back up at him, he’s unblocking his belt. At that moment, Sabrina bursts into tears.
Sabrina finally realizes that this man doesn’t want more than a one night stand. Just like the men before him. They don’t want to get to know her, they don’t want an actual relationship.
He looks confused. He crawls onto the bed and sits next to her. He doesn’t speak to her. Sabrina feels stupid for falling for another trick.
“I’m sorry,” Sabrina mutters as she slips off the bed and quickly walks out of the room. She doesn’t bother shutting the door, she doesn’t know why she apologized. What she does know is that no one will ever see her past her body.
When Sabrina exits the room, she looks around the upstairs area. People don't notice her as she slips into the nearest bathroom, locks the door, falls to the floor and cries.
The lip bite Sabrina shot her before glancing away remains on Olivia’s mind as Chappell complains on and on about something regarding math assignments. Olivia can’t help but wonder where Sabrina had wandered off to. They were staring at each other, when Sabrina glanced away, so did Olivia, and when Olivia looked back, Sabrina was gone. She also noticed that the guy Sabrina was with also disappeared.
It did not take long for Olivia to put two and two together. They were probably off together somewhere, a secluded area of the house. He was probably fucking the life out of her, considering his large size. A shot of jealousy found its place in Olivia’s chest yet again. This was inevitable and always seemed to bother Olivia because she knew she could never compare to the men Sabrina seemed to attract.
As Olivia tries her best to be distracted by Chappell's babbling, she spots Charli walking up towards the two of them.
“Have you guys seen Sabrina?” Charli asks, worriedly.
“Not recently, why?” Chappell asks.
“I heard some girl is out for her throat right now. Has a whole group of people who agree with her. Hates Sabrina’s guts. Thinks she’s a slut.” Charli states.
“Cause she is.” An unfamiliar voice cuts in. Olivia and Chappell look towards the new voice. A girl stands on Charli’s left. She’s dressed in a short white dress and has long ginger hair. When they all give the girl a confusing look as to who she is she says “Sabrina. Saw her heading upstairs with another guy just now. He’s probably inside her as we speak. Insane considering she slept with another guy yesterday.” The girl shrugs. Chappell shoots Olivia a confused glance and all Olivia can do is do the same thing.
“We don’t even know if they actually hooked up-” Charli starts but is cut off by the ginger-haired girl.
“Oh please. It’s obviously true. You can’t deny it. All she talks about is men and flirts with them. Sabrina’s a homewrecker.” The girl says, cockily.
The way this girl speaks about Sabrina hurts part of Olivia. Why does this girl hate Sabrina so much?
“You agree right, Olivia? You two are sworn enemies if I remember.” The girl looks straight at Olivia. She is in the middle of figuring out what to say to that when she hears Chappell’s voice.
“Okay Liv, I’m off. I wanna go say hi to some people. Are you coming?” Chappell asks, pushing herself off the wall.
Olivia suddenly feels very overwhelmed and sputters out “Yeah I’ll come. Do you know where the bathroom is by the way?”
“Oh yeah, it’s down that hall.” Charli points to the corridor past the kitchen.
Olivia mutters a thank you before scurrying down the corridor and knocking on the first door she sees. When she hears giggling Olivia knocks again, this time receiving gasps of sudden surprise. She hears a man call “Occupied.” from behind the door before bursting into a fit of giggles. Olivia sighs frustratedly before walking down a hallway to a more quiet section of the house.
Her head is starting to hurt and the lights are too much, Olivia thinks she might be sick. When she rounds a corner, Olivia is met with a staircase. There had to be a bathroom upstairs. Olivia slowly carried herself up the stairs before nearly bumping into someone who was about to rush down the stairs.
“I’m sorry.” Olivia mutters as the person runs past her, down the stairs. When the man reaches the bottom of the stairs and turns towards the left, Olivia recognizes him as the guy that was sitting with Sabrina earlier. She wonders where Sabrina went if he’s all alone.
Olivia then walks down the hall, past groups of people, in search of the restroom when she hears soft crying from behind a door she passed. Olivia comes to an abrupt stop. She leans towards the door, trying to piece together who might be crying. It’s no use, the hallway is too loud.
Olivia takes the risk and gathers up the courage to ask. “Excuse me, are you all right?” When the crying comes to a sudden stop, Olivia fears she should not have asked. She stops and really thinks. Maybe the person needed someone to talk to. Olivia flinches when everyone upstairs starts heading towards the staircase for what Olivia assumes is some sort of game. Eventually, Olivia and the person on the other side of the door are the only remaining people on the level.
“I’m sorry for scaring you. I didn’t mean to.” Olivia apologies as she sinks to the floor.
The person’s voice seems closer now. “It’s fine.” Olivia hears them sniffle.
Only then does Olivia recognize the voice. The last person she thought would be on the other side of this door. Sabrina. Olivia almost stands up right then and there before remembering, Sabrina probably has no one else to talk to considering all that happened last night.
“You can go. You don’t have to stay.” Sabrina scoffs. Now, leaving is the last thing Olivia wants to do.
“No, I can stay. If that’s okay with you.” Olivia assures. She then leans her head against the door and hears Sabrina do the same.
“That’s more than okay with me. I don’t think anyone wants to talk with me right now.” Sabrina mumbles, Olivia can barely hear her.
“No, I get it. I understand. Well not really but, I kind of know-” Olivia’s blabbering is cut short by Sabrina’s laugh. It’s so light and almost sweet sounding.
“You ramble quite often. Did you know that?” Sabrina asks.
Olivia can feel her face turning a deep pink. “No, I guess not. Sorry.” Olivia apologizes.
“You apologize a lot too.” Olivia can hear the smile in her voice. “It’s cute.”
Olivia’s world stops yet again. Being called cute by Sabrina was definitely not something she had planned for tonight. Olivia shakes her head, in an attempt to stop the blush from all but consuming her face. “I didn’t know that either.” And Olivia is replying to both the things Sabrina just said.
Sabrina scoffs before whispering “Can I tell you something I don’t think I’ve ever told anyone, Olivia?”
Somehow, Sabrina adding Olivia’s name to her question made this whole experience seem all the more real. “Of course.” Olivia manages to whisper back.
“I think tonight is the first time I realized that I’m really seen as nothing but a slut who centers herself around men. I think people are right about that, don’t you think?” Sabrina whispers, quietly.
Olivia takes a moment to breathe. Her hearing how Sabrina speaks of herself somehow hurts more than what that girl had said earlier.
“Sabrina, you’re so much more than your body. You’re sweet, funny, and really smart. People just need to realize that.” Olivia realizes what came out of her mouth and gasps. It’s far too late now.
“You think I’m sweet? You don’t even know me.” Sabrina scoffs.
Maybe I don’t but I sure as hell really want to. Olivia thinks to herself. She doesn’t say that out loud, afraid to cross the lines of whatever was starting here.
“I don’t think we know much about each other.” Olivia breathes, so quiet she’s unsure if Sabrina even heard her.
“Oh, definitely.” Sabrina agrees. “By the way, you’re re–your dress is really pretty.”
The stutter catches Olivia off guard. Sabrina isn’t someone known to stutter often. Olivia spends what feels like forever trying to figure out what Sabrina was maybe (maybe not?) trying to say.
You’re re– really what? Pretty? Awful? Weird? Olivia can’t bring herself to decide. To assume what Sabrina thinks of her.
Olivia’s phone buzzes with a notification just as she mutters a “Thank you” in an attempt to hide the fact that she’s spiraling.
Olivia picks her phone off the floor and opens the messages Chappell sent her, as well as an unread message from Tate.
chappelll:
10:38 pm
not in the mood for drinks?
is everything ok???
are you alone?
Olivia disliked your message.
tateee:
10:12 pm
Where r u?
Come to the back
We’re playing a drinking game
Read at 10:39 pm
Olivia places her phone back on the ground before turning her head towards the door. “There’s a drinking game downstairs, you want to go?”
“In a bit. I kind of like it here.” Sabrina sighs. That was the last thing Olivia expected Sabrina to say. Although, she cannot deny the fact that she enjoys it here too.
“Yeah,” Is all Olivia manages to whisper before resting her head on the door again and not noticing she drifts off.
“ –livia? Olivia?” A voice calls, accompanied by gentle knocking.
Olivia’s eyes shoot open. Oh gosh, how long had she been sleeping? She rubs her eyes quickly. “Geez, I’m so sorry.”
“It’s okay. You just weren’t replying or anything so I assumed you maybe fell asleep.” Sabrina explains from behind the door.
Olivia feels her heart get caught in her throat. She couldn’t believe she fucked up the one chance she had to speak with Sabrina. She also completely ignored what Sabrina was telling her and Olivia was convinced it was something vulnerable.
“I’m so, so sorry. I didn’t mean to. You weren’t–what you were talking about wasn’t boring or anything–” Olivia’s rambling is cut short.
“Hey, it’s fine. I wasn’t saying anything important.” Sabrina states.
Even after the reassurance, Olivia still remained feeling like shit. She stood up quickly, causing her to feel lightheaded. “I–I have to go. Someone’s looking for me.” Olivia blurts out.
Olivia doesn’t stay long enough to hear what Sabrina says. If she said anything at all that is. She’s too busy rushing down the stairs, arms wrapped around her torso. Coward. Olivia thinks to herself. When Olivia reaches the back of the building where the current activities were taking place, her eyes fly across the space in search of Tate.
She’s not hard to spot. Tate is talking with some people, red solo cup in hand. Olivia walks over and greets everyone in the circle before turning directly to her friend. Tate, who is mid-sip of her drink, nearly chokes when she sees Olivia standing before her.
“Oh my god, where have you been? It’s been like an hour.” Tate smiles, wiping the drink off her lips.
“Just needed somewhere quiet to go. Do you know where Chappell is?” Olivia asks, looking around.
“I think she’s with Billie out back.” Tate answers, taking another sip from the plastic cup.
Olivia thanks Tate, leaving her to continue her conversation before walking towards the entrance that leads to the backyard. She can’t help herself from gasping as she stands in the entry way. The backyard is huge. Unlike any back yard Olivi has ever seen. A low platform of stone is sparsely decorated with matching chairs and loveseats. Stairs lead down to the large pool surrounded by people sitting alongside the edge with their legs hanging in the water.
Olivia makes her way past the crowds of people until she has a complete view of the backyard’s lower level. Her eyes dart around in search of Chappell and stop when she spots her fiery red hair by the bright pool. She’s sitting on a chair that’s positioned to face a sofa. On the sofa sits Billie and–
Olivia stops dead in her tracks when she spots Sabrina sitting casually on Billie’s lap. Olivia considers convincing herself that whoever she was talking with behind the door wasn’t Sabrina. Olivia snaps her gaze away before returning it to where the two are sitting on the sofa. One of Billie’s hands is around Sabrina’s waist, holding her in place as the other holds a red cup.
Olivia attempts to suppress a wince when Sabrina laughs a little too hard at something Billie says and leans towards her. Olivia can hear Chappell announce that she’s getting another drink before bringing herself to her feet and heading towards the house. Olivia steps off to the side, –trying her best to blend into the large crowd– to avoid being spotted. It’s strange considering the fact that Olivia’s purpose for coming out here was to find Chappell. After Chappell passes, Olivia turns back towards the sofa.
Sabrina and Billie are in the middle of talking about something when Sabrina grabs hold of Billie’s chin and lifts her chin to look directly at Sabrina. Olivia can spot Billie’s quick action of dropping her gaze from Sabrina’s eyes, to her lips, then to her eyes again. Sabrina then begins to lean in and Olivia tears her gaze away before their lips meet. At least Olivia believes they do.
Olivia turns on her heel fast and makes her way back up to the house, trying her best not to bump into overly drunk people. The music has softened but the lights feel even stronger than before. Too much is going on in Olivia's head. Did she imagine the whole conversation she had with Sabrina? Did Sabrina want to be her friend –or maybe more– just as much as Olivia did? Were Sabrina and Billie back together? She makes her way to the more secluded area of the house where only a few people mingle in a well decorated living space.
Olivia takes a seat on an empty chair before opening her phone and quickly texting Tate.
:olivia
11:34pm
tate i think im going home
?do you want to come with me or stay longer
Olivia taps her nails on her phone waiting for a reply.
tateee:
11:37
Realllllyyyy???
It’s not even modnjght
:(
Olivia sighs, suspecting that Tate is far too drunk than she should be.
:olivia
11:38pm
you can stay longer
?do you have someone to drive you home
???
tateee:
11:40
I’ll probably driuve home with Addie and Sabrina or smtheng
The mention of Sabrina’s name makes Olivia’s jaw clench.
:olivia
.Olivia liked your message
Having confirmed that Tate was not driving home with her, Olivia sat up from the seat and walked outside. She walks down the huge steps of the house and makes her way to her car.
On the car ride home, Olivia’s eyes start to sting before streams of tears start falling down her face.
When Olivia arrives home she greets her parents with a wave and practiced smile before disappearing into her room. She has never wanted to take off an article of clothing so eagerly before. After changing into her pajamas and settling into bed, all Olivia can do is sigh and stare up at the ceiling as tears make their way out her eyes and onto her pillowcase.
Before Olivia falls asleep, she opens her secret journal and writes down a singular line.
Smart sexy Lacy, I’m losing it lately