Chapter Text
March 10th, 2010
Cotswolds, England.
Gerard felt a mixture of anxiety and fear. He was just a 14-year-old boy trying to convince his mother to let him move to another continent in pursuit of the promise of a promising music career.
"Son, I understand it’s your dream, but Los Angeles?" The woman seemed unyielding, and Gerard felt himself dying inside little by little. "It’s not like letting you go to London on a school trip. Los Angeles is on the other side of the world!"
"But Mom, this might be a once-in-a-lifetime chance! You read the contract, it’s a really good opportunity! I’ll study with the best in the music field for two years until I finish my first album and launch myself into the music market!" The teenager gesticulated wildly, his eyes shining with someone who had countless dreams.
Donna felt her heart falter. Gerard was just a boy full of dreams. She couldn’t deprive him of living his life, but fuck, he was her son. Her 14-year-old son, who now wanted to move to another continent to try to make a living out of music. He had only just entered adolescence. As a responsible mother, she shouldn’t let him go, but as a mother who loved her son unconditionally and believed in his potential, she knew that the right thing was to let him live and have his own experiences.
"Love," Paul, the boy’s stepfather, whispered beside her so only she could hear. "Let him go. You know he needs this."
The woman met his eyes, wavering, but her shoulders soon dropped in defeat. Gerard saw his mother’s body language shift and tensed with anticipation.
"Okay, Gerard, you win." She declared, but before he could even try to say anything, she continued. "But we’ll spend every holiday in America, and I want you to keep us informed about everything! I’ll need to set up a meeting with your manager…"
Her speech was cut off by her son throwing himself into her arms. She was startled — Gerard never hugged anyone.
"Thank you, Mom! Thank you!" Gerard hugged her tightly and whispered so only she could hear, "You’re amazing."
The older woman’s eyes welled with tears, and she felt that, somehow, she had made the right choice.
"I love you, my son," she began, her voice slightly wavering from the mix of emotions. "I’m sorry if I’m not as…"
"I know." He cut her off, now looking her in the eyes. "I love you too, Mom."
[...]
August 10th, 2010
08:53 p.m.
Los Angeles, USA.
"Way, this will be your housing for the next two years," the teenager’s manager said while answering something on his phone.
Gerard was ecstatic. He loved music more than anything, and the idea of making money with it? He couldn’t think of anything better. Sure, okay, it was on the other side of the world, and he’d have to be far from his family — and even though he loved them deeply, he had never truly felt like he belonged there.
He longed for something bigger, something that quiet life in England would never give him. He craved the American dream — the money, the fame, the success. Yes, he was here for the music, but the idea of becoming something big would leave anyone dazzled.
"Well, you can put your belongings on that side of the room." The man pointed to the spot.
Gerard gave him a strange look, but the man didn’t even notice, too absorbed in his phone. The room wasn’t bad, but it was surprisingly small, and he would be sharing it with another boy who was signed under the same company. Something like Maxell or Mason — he honestly couldn’t remember. His roommate’s side of the room was an absolute mess: basketball player posters plastered all over the wall, a pile of books tossed onto the nightstand, and then the disaster on the bed — clothes scattered everywhere. It was chaos.
Gerard wrinkled his nose a bit but shrugged. What did he expect? He was going to live, at the very least, the next two years of his life in a shared apartment with other young guys also trying to make a living through art. He had kinda expected this already.
And since his manager didn’t seem inclined to say anything else, Gerard grabbed his things and brought them to his side of the room, dropping his two suitcases on the bed along with his guitar case. He would organize everything later, after the man left — ignoring him now would feel weird.
"Well… Mr. Jones," the boy began, a bit embarrassed. "I was hoping you could give me the schedule of my appointments, so I can be prepared for the activities."
"Yes, of course, Way, don’t worry about that. In the drawer of your nightstand you’ll find all your schedules for this month." The manager, Martin Jones, said, looking at him for the first time during the whole conversation. "I recommend you don’t lose it under any circumstances. You know, this is work — we collaborate with serious people. Keep up with your schedules, your rehearsals, your studies, and I’m sure that in two years your debut single, along with your first album, will be ready."
"You won’t be disappointed, Mr. Jones," the teenager responded quickly, making the man let out a half-laugh.
"You’re going to do well, Way," he said with a smile. "You’re talented from what I’ve seen, charismatic — a bit shy, sure, but that’s just practice. You’re good-looking too, the media will go crazy when we launch you. Mark my words, kid: you’re going to be something big."
Gerard listened to those words with shining eyes, clinging to them tightly, like a mantra. You’re going to be something big. Yes — he would be something big.
"Well, Way, I think that’s it," the man continued before the boy could reply. "I’ll be heading out now. You have my number and the address of the label’s headquarters. Don’t worry about the other boys; they’re chill. In the end, you’re all looking for the same thing — don’t forget that. Friends are important, yes, but your career matters more. Keep that in mind too. For now, organize your things and rest — tomorrow you’ve got a full day, don’t forget to check your schedule." The older man took one last look around, as if making sure he hadn’t forgotten something. "See you tomorrow, kid."
And just as quickly as he had entered, he left, shutting the door behind him and leaving Gerard alone for the first time in his life. He was excited at the prospect of a new life, but scared too. He was alone — and now it was official. Only he could make something of himself.
[...]
10:45 p.m.
The teenager had finished organizing his belongings a while ago. He had placed his clothes in the small dresser available in the room, arranged his books on the nightstand beside his bed, and decorated the wall next to him with a few posters of artists he liked and some family photos. Despite the strange feeling, it now looked a bit more like home. Of course, it couldn’t compare to his old room, where he had better furniture, but it was something he could live with. He had also read through his schedule and prepared himself for tomorrow — the anxiety was consuming him.
With nothing else to do, he was reading one of his books, waiting for his roommate to leave the bathroom so he could get ready for bed.
"Gerard Way, right?" The voice startled him at first, making him drop the book onto the bed, which caused the other boy to laugh. "Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you. I didn’t think you were that focused. Nice to meet you, Matthew Sanders, but you can call me Matt."
The boy extended his hand to him. Gerard looked at him and accepted the friendly handshake. Matthew was definitely something — handsome and friendly, with an elegant smile on his face, hair with bleached ends that gave him personality, slightly toned, and his light eyes were so intense they gave him a unique, striking appearance.
Gerard felt ridiculously small in comparison. Okay, he knew he wasn’t ugly, but Matthew was on another level. For the first time in his life, he felt too skinny. His black hair wasn’t bad at all, but next to Matthew’s fantastic, personality-filled hair, he suddenly felt plain. He couldn’t help but compare — he was just a 14-year-old boy entering the mainstream, while Matthew already had experience and was beginning a very promising career. Gerard had read a bit about him on some blogs when he found out they’d be roommates, and even then he didn’t remember his name, which was a bit embarrassing — though Matthew would never know that.
"Yeah, that’s me. Gerard Way." He smiled, putting on his best confident-boy mask. "Nice to meet you, Matthew. I’ve heard a lot about you — ‘breakout artist of the year,’ huh?" He laughed, trying to make conversation, and Matt returned the laughter.
"I try," he replied with a grin, sitting on his bed and leaning his back against the wall. "You seem like a cool guy, Way. We were kinda worried about what the new kid would be like. We had some problems with the last one who shared the room with me. Unfortunately... Gleen was a good guy."
Gerard felt uncomfortable at the mention of the name. He only vaguely knew what had happened — something about theft — they hadn’t given him much information.
"Well, I hope I live up to your expectations." He felt a little awkward. Matthew Sanders was a rising star — comparing himself to him in multiple ways was impossible not to do. "Uh… Matthew, can I ask you something?"
"Sure."
"How is it?" he asked. When he saw Matt’s confused expression, he continued, "How is it to be where you are? To make music and have people listen to it — people who care about it? Knowing that someone cares enough about your work to fund it because they truly believe in the music you make?"
Matthew stayed silent for a few seconds, thinking about what to say.
"It’s crazy, man, that’s what I can tell you. I’m not much older than you — I’m 17, I just got into this — but it’s just crazy. You have to keep your head straight and know who you are and why you’re here. This world is complicated. There are advantages, but there are also disadvantages. You just have to learn how to deal with it. You’ve got a lot of potential, Way. I can see it in you. And even though I don’t really know you or your work yet, you give me a sense of something. I hope I’m not wrong about you."
For the first time in his life, Gerard felt understood. Matthew Sanders’ words, though direct, were comforting. It felt good knowing someone like Matt believed in him. He thought he knew what he was getting into, but doubt would always exist — after all, what does a 14-year-old really know about life?
"I don’t want to scare you, it’s honestly way more good than bad," Matthew continued after a moment of silence. "Just stay true to yourself. And don’t really trust anyone — people can be really sneaky, man." Gerard didn’t respond, but his expression said everything. "Well, dude, let’s get some sleep. Tomorrow I’ll introduce you to the guys, and I’m sure your first day is packed, right?"
Gerard laughed. He noticed the sudden change of subject and was grateful for it.
"Yeah. Yeah, it’s packed as hell." They exchanged a small laugh, and silence settled again. "Thanks for the talk, Matthew." He continued, and the other boy just nodded. "Good night."
Gerard then got up from the bed before Matt could reply and headed to the bathroom to get ready for sleep. His life was different now — and it was only just beginning.