Chapter Text
Tiny Flasks
The party was lit. So lit.
That was what Jay was thinking in his bed, now awake, head pounding, he forced himself to get out of bed and get put on a t-shirt, he looked at the medical prescription on the bedside table, a prescription he got a year after being diagnosed with BPD.
He pressed his knuckles until they turned white, he felt like everything was changing inside him, he received the confirmation,he yearned for the confirmation of something not being right about him, not because of having the actual thing, but to make his mind quiet so he can stop thinking there's something bad about him.
He decided to leave it there, his head was pounding, he went to the kitchen and started chugging water which made him remember what happened in that party.
It was all foggy he remembered going out with Tim to celebrate his graduation he was kicked out his house, his parents told him he can tend alone to himself now. So seeing him without a roof. Living in his car, who accepted to help him?.
Jay
Jay was a bit drunk at the time Tim told him the not so kind news about his parents, so let's say the BPD and the alcohol had him in a let's say.... Altered euphoric state, trying to suppress what he was feeling he ended up taking a impulsive decision:
Let Tim stay at his house
"Was it true or I'm hallucinating" he said to himself, between this and the long names of 4 medications he had to buy he was on edge
"Will the meds work?, when did I invited him?, I don't remember anything, I can barely pronounce Venlafaxine?"
His thoughts were faster than a tennis match on steroids.
I need to calm down he said to his insides.
He finished dressing and went to the pharmacy, there was a long line of people waiting and he was starting to feel anxious again.
"What if I pronounce Venlafaxine badly?" "What if everyone listens to what I buy"
He was in his head while he gets a text from Tim.
"Hey I'm outside of the building, please open the door"
That put him on edge and it made him feel small and embarrassed, he sight and replied:
"Hey, just wait there I'm in the pharmacy line right now, I'll be there in a moment"
His anxiety was killing him inside, in that moment he received another text.
"The one just in the front of your house?"
He was about to bite my nails and was scared to tell him yes but he did because he was a lot of things but a liar wasn't one of them.
"Yeah."
"I'm coming" he replied
He was so nervous he just wanted the line go fast, what was happening inside there, it was Thursday they didn't have discounts on Thursday's, the line was slowly moving he was behind 10 people so he just prayed it moved faster because he was scared ,Tim would see and ask everything, he looked to the horizon and there he was, The Man, The Legend himself, Tim wright walking up to him in a flannel a jacket, some jeans and black shoes.
"Hey, what's up!"
He got closer to Jay and hugged him, it was a friendly hug, nothing more nothing less just a simple and plain hug, he was taken aback but hugged him regardless and said.
"Hey Tim"
He was getting shy to see the taller one close to him, not that he liked Tim, he was nervous about the questions he might ask, he hasn't processed anything that has happened in the last 2 days.
He was changing he was a different person, he felt weirder, like an outcast, like his life was suddenly over and cut short by a lot of things he read online by his diagnosis, the dying at 25, the suicide attempts ideations.
Thoughts that scared him a lot but he has definitely felt before, those first few nights were the scariest nights he's ever lived, of course, he never wants to think about them but they were almost always coming back, he hoped they don't come back.
He thought for himself.
They both separated by the hug, the duration of this hug was running though Jay's head, it was longer than a hello hug, like almost awkward.
Jay doesn't know.
Jay wasn't sure about any of this.
He sighed and smiled.
"So, how was the traffic?"
He says where there was almost absolutely no cars in the block around them, he must've felt pretty smart don't y'all think?
Tim just laughed and said.
"It was alright", while cratching his head.
Jay picked up that scratch as confirmation he was fucking it up so he just said.
"That's alright, what you buying?, are you sick or something".
He asked as they get more closer to the cashier, he didn't wanted to make things awkward so he said.
"Just some Painkillers...and condoms".
WHY DID HE SAID THAT???
we we'll never know why did he said that but he blushed and Tim looked at the big prescription Jay was holding, he cleared his throat and he asked:
"Why is the prescription so big?"
He panicked and when he was about to open his mouth at the counter screamed
"NEXT!"
He walked up to her looked at the paper and....