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For Yuuji and Megumi, the slide between friends to lovers isn't a conscious decision. It's not a sober decision either. It's a decision spurred by too much booze at a frat party a few months after Hana and Megumi's split.
They attend with Nobara, Maki, Yuuta and Toge, which is already a recipe for disaster, being the two single people accompanying their friends who are in happy and fulfilled relationships, and as the night goes on and everyone goes their separate ways, they remain at each other's side throughout.
There's the typical hijinks and shenanigans. They play beer pong against Mai and Miwa. They play poker with Hakari and Kirara, stopping before they can lose too much money. They hang out with Panda for a bit, Yuuji on his fifth beer, and Megumi on his third gin & tonic, wondering to themselves what the guy looks like under his fursuit and whether they know him from elsewhere and don't recognise him. There's some dancing to EDM. More drinks.
Finally, it stops being fun and starts to feel overstimulating for Megumi instead, so he tugs at Yuuji's sleeve, asks if they can both step out to get some air.
On the way there, some film student gives Yuuji their number, smiling and squeezing his shoulder. Once the kid's gone, Megumi gives Yuuji a thoughtful look.
They make their way out of the door. That's when everything really starts.
"Junpei's cool and all," Yuuji admits, folding up the piece of paper and putting it in his pocket, "but I doubt it'll go anywhere. If we actually talk, he'll tire of me sooner or later."
"Tire of you?" Megumi frowns, not liking where this is heading.
"Happens all the time," Yuuji says. And it could be a joke maybe, but there's something about his tone and his expression, a bit too open and honest, a bit too jagged and rough - all sharp edges - that has Megumi wondering at it.
"Don't act like you get turned down frequently," Megumi says, the alcohol turning his tone into something visibly fond instead of snappy or blunt. "You're like, inherently likeable."
"Well, you'd be surprised," Yuuji says with a small self-desecrating laugh. The glow from the streetlamps lights him up subtly, making his hair look closer to peach than to the bubblegum pink Megumi knows it to be. In this light, the circles under his eyes are clearly visible. "I'm too much for a lot of people."
"What," Megumi says, flat. Something flares up in his gut, the same emotion he'd felt before beating up bullies who talked shit about Tsumiki. He'd broken the femur of some guy who'd called her a slut; he knows he'd do the same for Yuuji.
He's never felt this level of protectiveness for anyone but his sister before, but somehow it's not scary. Not when Yuuji looks like that - like nobody's ever fought for him, or told him that he deserves better.
Taking Megumi's simmering disbelief as something else, Yuuji elaborates, "I care too much. Partners don't like that."
He smiles, solely intended to reassure Megumi, no warmth or happiness behind it. "I fall in love too quickly and it freaks people out. After a point, I stopped saying it, you know? Tried to be a little more.... what's the word... blasé. But it didn't work anyway. My actions said what my words didn't. Cooking with people, going grocery shopping together, talking about the future... whatever I did always gave me away."
He sighs, pensive, looking at Megumi for a brief moment before he stares into the distance. "It puts pressure onto people, apparently. They think I want too much. That I'm hard to love." He shrugs.
Megumi frowns. "That's fucked. I find that hard to believe."
"Dude, are you mad at me?" Yuuji stares at Megumi.
"What? No," Megumi says, trying to get his expression back to neutrality.
Yuuji, his best friend, sees through this. "You sound pretty mad."
"Okay, yes, I am mad," Megumi says. Before Yuuji can jump to the wrong conclusion, he adds, "Not at you though. Never at you."
Yuuji's face does a thing, visibly questioning. If they were in a manga, Megumi thinks Yuuji would probably have a question mark drawn above his head - his confusion is that apparent.
"You're the most loveable person I know," Megumi says, and maybe he's shown his hand here, but he can't find it in himself to care. Not when Yuuji looks so sad. "As your best friend, I think I'd fucking know. Anyone would be lucky to have you as a partner. Yes, you love people with all your heart, but that's the best thing about you. I'm angry with whoever made you feel like there's something wrong with you for that, or like you needed to tone it down, to make yourself smaller, to deserve love."
Yuuji stares at him in shock. And then says, quietly, "I don't know. I think you give me too much credit."
Megumi flicks Yuuji on the forehead.
"Ouch!"
"That's for doubting me!" Megumi glares. "Just accept the compliment."
"You've been hanging out with Nobara too much," Yuuji says, but he smiles anyway, a small and shy thing. "Megumi, I don't know how to say this. But I understand where the people who felt that way are coming from. A lot of people don't want a partner like me. They want a partner like you."
"Me?!" Megumi blinks. Waits for a marching band to pop out of the bushes, for someone to say, APRIL FOOLS really loudly. When none of this happens, he narrows his gaze on Yuuji. "Elaborate, please."
"You're thoughtful and considerate, and you're intense, but you're not overly affectionate," Yuuji says. "You'd do anything for the people you love, but you don't smother them. You're so cool and collected all the time."
"Yuuji, are you for real?" Megumi laughs despite himself, in disbelief. "Firstly, are you implying that you wouldn't do anything for the people you love? Or that you smother them with love? Because neither of those things are true. Secondly, most of the things you listed as plus points were Hana's reason for breaking it off with me, so..."
"Shit dude, I'm sorry," Yuuji says, putting an arm around Megumi. He's too close to Megumi, the smell of beer on his breath in Megumi's face, and Megumi would find it obnoxious were it anyone but Yuuji. "Didn't mean to bring her up..."
"It's okay, seriously," Megumi says. "The break-up was mutual, you know that. She wasn't what I was looking for either. There's no bad blood."
"Still," Yuuji frowns. "I hate it when people act like you're some kind of prickly hedgehog with no emotions."
"I project that image so people don't fuck with me," Megumi admits. "So it's fine, you know."
"I just...." Yuuji sighs. He looks sad, Megumi notes. "You said I was the most loveable person you know. I think you're the most loveable person I know. Megumi, you're so devoted and focused in how you care about people. You're so intentional with it. Todo said this thing about me once, about how I'd probably fall in love with someone if they held a door open for me or something. You're not like that."
"I don't think how you are is a bad thing," Megumi says. "And don't make me fight Todo again, because I will."
Yuuji laughs, but it sounds shaky. He turns, wrapping Megumi in a hug. "Maybe we should agree to disagree?"
"No," Megumi says. "I'll accept all your compliments if you accept mine."
Yuuji goes still.
"You see me as loveable, and that's the biggest compliment you could give me," Megumi says. And the next thing he knows, Yuuji is kissing him.
He kisses back, despite everything. They're tipsy and the world feels blurred around the edges, but Yuuji is solid and real. He tastes like beer and soda and salt, but the press of his lips and the warmth of his mouth is addictive and thrilling, and Megumi dives in for more when they first break apart to catch their breath. His hands fist in the collar of Yuuji's hoodie, and he's aware of Yuuji's hands curling around his back, pulling him closer. Their bodies are pressed so close that he can feel the steady line of Yuuji like he's lying on a concrete floor, stable and firm.
And then they break away, Yuuji's face as pink as his hair, and he's shaking as he looks at Megumi. "Megumi, I..." he takes a shaky breath. "I'm sorry," he begins to say.
"What the hell are you apologising for? I kissed you back, in case you didn't notice." Megumi frowns, but then Yuuji sways.
"I don't regret it or anything like that," Yuuji half-mumbles, half-slurs, and Megumi wraps his arms around him, holding him upright. "I just.... too much to drink."
He wriggles out of Megumi's grasp and squats by the sidewalk, throws up in the gutter. Megumi crouches, rubbing his back in circles. Waiting for it to pass.
Like all things, it does. Megumi pulls him up. "Come on, back to mine. I'll make you some tea, I've got some blends that are good for the stomach, if you're feeling nauseous, whatever."
Yuuji is silent, letting himself be shepherded, but after ten minutes of walking, he finally says, "Why are you being so normal about this?"
"I'm a very normal guy," Megumi deadpans.
Yuuji snorts, a laugh he doesn't want to let out yet, and Megumi knows they'll be okay, no matter what.
"Yeah, but I just..." Yuuji gestures.
"Threw up after making out with me? Yes." Megumi lets the hint of a smile slip. "You sure know how to charm a guy."
"You're an asshole," Yuuji says, but he's giggling.
Megumi wraps an arm around him, squeezes his shoulder. Yuuji's usually the one who initiates more physical touch, but drunk Megumi can't think of anything other than how important it is to keep Yuuji close, as close as possible.
"I don't think you learnt anything new there," Megumi says. He ushers Yuuji forward. "We're here."
They take the elevator up to Megumi's, and they're both pretty quiet even as Megumi makes them tea, and Yuuji sits down at the kitchen table, closing his eyes and covering his face with his hands.
He serves the tea, sits across Yuuji. Yuuji thanks him, takes a small sip. "We're going to talk about this?"
"When we're both sober," Megumi says, taking a sip from his cup of tea as well. He presses the arch of his foot against Yuuji's shin. "I think ironically enough we both agree on everything, just... reversed. I think you'd make a perfect boyfriend for all the reasons I suck. And you think I'd be a good boyfriend for reasons that you're not so good at. It's a reasonable conjecture that we should date."
"You're making this sound like a scientific experiment," Yuuji says. "But I agree. And I feel a lot more sober. Puking out my guts and walking for twenty minutes helped. But I also think we should discuss this in the morning, after a good night's sleep. I would love to be your boyfriend, Megumi. I can't think of anything that'd make me happier. But also did you notice, the way you mentioned our reasons, you were so much harsher on yourself than you were on me? The reasons you suck - really?"
"I mean," Megumi sighs, putting down his teacup, staring at the dregs at the bottom of the swirling liquid. "Hana would agree to differ on that."
"I'm not Hana," Yuuji points out. "I'm your best friend. Even if dating wasn't on the table, even if we never get together, and even if we get together and break up and grow apart, I'll emphasize: you don't suck. It makes me sad to hear you say that."
"I understand," Megumi says. "It makes me sad to hear you say you feel like you're hard to love."
"Sometimes I feel like everyone thinks that," Yuuji admits, quietly. "Even Gramps. And Choso in a way - he doesn't see it as a burden or a struggle, but he does consider it a lot of work. Work he's happy to do.... but still."
Megumi sighs, extends his hands across the table, takes Yuuji's hands in his. "Loving you is easy as breathing," he says, and he really means it. He can't think of anything he means more.
The honest vulnerability is worth it to see Yuuji smile like a sunrise, warm and full of light. Golden, pink, glowing in darkness and filling the room with the energy of a new day brimming with infinite possibilities.
"I love you too," he says quietly. "Megumi. You too."
Megumi presses a kiss to Yuuji's knuckles, holding Yuuji's hands up to his face. Both of them have fighter's hands, calloused and scarred from their youth of getting roughed up and roughing up other people. Yuuji, the Tiger and Megumi the King of Shadow. In the kitchen, they're just people.
"No take-backsies," Yuuji says, softly. "You're stuck with me now."
"Haven't I always been?" Megumi smiles. It's true. The romantic aspect may be new, but their bond and commitment to each other is a longtime thing, strengthened and immune to anything that could possibly separate them.
"Well," Yuuji looks to be at a complete loss of words, which is a new look on him. "I'm glad it's easy."
"Easier than anything else," Megumi promises again. He stands up, gently pulling Yuuji with him. "Come to bed."
When Yuuji goes pink, he clarifies, "Just to sleep next to me, my god. Get your mind out of the gutter."
We've done this a million times before, he doesn't say.
And in the quiet of the night, in Megumi's queen-sized bed that's not exactly big enough to leave space between them, they still curl up around each other to get as close as they possibly can. Yuuji's always been a cuddler, and while Megumi usually seeks out cuddles in his sleep, used to waking up to find himself holding Yuuji - tonight he's drunk enough to make the first move. To hold him close.
"I love you," he says, half-asleep.
Yuuji doesn't say anything. Megumi thinks about Yuuji's confession from earlier, about people thinking he was somehow too much, too intense. He frowns, determined. He's going to match Yuuji, if not outpace him. He's going to give Yuuji the kind of love Yuuji always gives everyone else. And maybe then, finally, Yuuji will understand. How rare and special it is. What a true blessing it is, to hold the heart of another person entirely in his hands.
He falls asleep before Yuuji murmurs, shy, "I love you too," but that's alright. He falls asleep knowing it, anyway.