Work Text:
It was a late except Vox actually took off work for once in his fucking life, you were surprised but decided to not dwell on it. You and Vox both laid in bed together, he was scrolling on his phone. And you were just fucking tried. After a while of the two of you just sitting in silence you got up to take a shower.
The second you closed the door you sunk to the floor. Your bones aced with a feeling you thought you left behind after you died. You felt like you were drowning, you’ve felt worthless. You wondered why Vox would ever date someone like you. You were ugly old scars covered your thighs how could he find you attractive!? You held yourself close as you tried to make your sobs as quiet as possible, the last thing you wanted was for him to hear your relentless crying. you fought the urge to relapse right there. The thought itself made you cry more you’ve gone a year resisting the urge. You let out a shaky sigh and stood up your legs shaking, you turned on the water but didn’t get into the shower just stared at it your eyes drifted over to the razor your fists clenched you couldn’t.. but fuck you needed too.
just one cut wouldn’t hurt right…?
You struggled for a moment getting the razor blade out but once you knew what you needed to do. Your palms sweat
You cut once.
Twice…
And sooner than you’d like to admit you lost count of how many new cuts covered your thighs.
What the fuck have you done…
You began to cry again tears falling down your face your own blood pooled down your legs. You stood up grabbing the counter for support. Your legs could barely support you in your state of panic. fuck what if Vox found out- of course he would find out fuck you were so fucked.
You managed to get into the shower as you washed yourself trying to be extra gentle around your cuts they just ended burning more than before. You switched the water between burning hot and freezing cold trying to distract yourself. You turned the water up WAY too high ended up burning yourself you yelped and attempted and jump back only to fall
“shit!”
Vox overheard this was was panicked one by the hoarseness of his partner’s voice and two the loud thud the fallowed after her yelling. he barged in immediately normally you wouldn’t care but now was probably the worst time he could’ve.
You froze like a deer in headlights. Your whole body was shaking blood stained the tub making it obvious of what she did
“What the fuck happened!? Why didn’t you say anything I was a room away!”
Vox yelled although he wasn’t mad at you he was mad at himself for letting this happen.
“I-I’m sorry..! I just I- I’m sorry..!”
You continued to babbled ‘I’m sorry’ more times than you could count. He sighed and carefully picked you up.
“Hey.. hey you’re ok.. just breathe can you do that for me darling.?”
He let out a few exaggerated breaths that were a little shaky as he held your trembling body in his arms. You tried to mimic them but they came out in short gasps for air. Your hands tightly clutched his suit, he sighed and after some time your breathing calmed down.
“Let’s get you cleaned up ok.?”